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Thread: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

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    Default Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    For those who don't know me, the details you'll need to know for this to make sense are as follows:

    Relationship: I am engaged to SW member MissMinxx, been together over 2 years. We have a mutual live in girlfriend who is called on these boards GF#1, she's lived with us almost exactly 2 years and been dating us for about 8 or 9 months. There is another girl who started dating all of us and ended up dating only me cuz the girls got sick of her drama, GF#2, who for months now has been the source of all the misery in our collective lives but whom we try to help out and support. She's been around about 8 months.

    Accident: 50 weeks ago MM & I were rear-ended by an uninsured driver. She had nasty whiplash & a concussion, I came out much worse, same as her plus 2 blown disks in my back and one bulging in my neck. We were both on the clock for a company I was a partner in, and it became a workers comp case. I've been on disability for 11 months while the insurance company, doctors, and lawyers argue about my treatment.

    Other shit: I'm a die hard car guy and many year SCCA member who is totally addicted to autocross and sometimes drag races or runs road courses (always at the track). I LOVE my car.

    THE WORST WEEK EVER:

    It started with the usual drama with GF#2. The other girls and I are in a committed triad, but GF#2 has her occasional flings. She was seeing one of them last week and was fighting with me about my attitude about it which was all in her head, as usual, I don't care. At one point, he asked her to come to Phoenix with him for a few days. She asked me if that was cool. I wasn't thrilled, but whatever - your life. I asked if I could see her for a night before she left since she'd been with him most of the week. She picked a fight about it. I got the sense something was amiss here. Long story short, I figured she was getting ready to get more serious with this guy and was lying to him about me to keep her options open. I was right.

    This lead to a series of events the details of which I will spare you all, but resulted in my laptop smashed on the floor, my garage trashed, my hand bleeding profusely from going through a plate glass picture frame, and some other good stuff. There was a lot of emotional outbursts from a lot of people, that was the short version. Anyway - it ended with her taking off with him in his car after lying to my face and then telling him I was going to fight him (I wanted to talk to him and compare stories, she couldn't allow that, lol, I have NOTHING against this guy and still don't despite what follows here) and me chasing them 'cuz by this point I was that stupid.

    Without going into details about both of us doing some stupid shit on the road, my favorite car is now totaled (tree at 60-65 mph), the cops have been to my house twice, her shit is packed and she's living with a friend downtown until she gets a place, and after her trip to AZ she's still lying to me about her intention to move in with that guy (I don't know why, seeing as I have no intention of seeing her ever again) and lying to him about me, and I've had to re-key my house.

    Oh - insult to injury - earlier THAT WEEK I had just renewed registration, put brand new tires on the car, and filled it with Shell premium the night before. All wasted.

    So - bad breakup over the course of Sunday leading to a totaled car and a missed (important) race day, a hand that is going to take weeks to heal (took 3 days to stop bleeding), about a thousand bucks worth of other property damage around the house, and all the associated emotional crap.

    But we are SO not done yet.

    Tuesday morning the workers comp insurance company calls and says they believe I have reached MMI - Maximum Medical Involvement - and they're going to stop paying my disability. Mind you, I'm in the same condition I've been in for almost a year now - they've just decided that since THEY won't authorize surgery, there's nothing else that can be done so they're releasing me. I will win the appeal, but in the couple of months while that goes down I will have no checks coming in at all.

    The bank that held my car note and my car insurance company are fighting about how to handle my wreck now that the car is officially totaled. Neither of their respective positions helps me at all. They HAVE decided that I will owe about $4000 when it's all done though.

    I an emotionally drained, horribly depressed, hurt both physically and emotionally, broke and going broker now, and there's no end in sight for weeks at least. A lot of it is my own damn fault, but a lot of it isn't, too.

    Worst week ever.

    [/crybaby rant]
    Last edited by Almost Jaded; 04-01-2011 at 02:55 PM.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Sorry man, that's rough. Big hug and a shot of tequila proverbially coming your way. What are you gonna do? What happened to the VC company you were starting?

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Sorry Bro...but it's bound to happen with all those women running around you.
    Side note you were right about Shell's gas....smooth!

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Thanks for the shot. I need more. In order for a VC company to do any V'ing, there has to be some C. My partner saw to it that our first V sucked up 80% of our C whilst ignoring several other V's that are now seeking outside C. I love the guy, but his ego killed our company.

    The remaining two are very little drama Unbeleavable. We have a great little relationship going in here. I shudder to think where I'd be right now without the support they've been to me the last few days, even if the did contribute to the stress the first couple of days into this. For those thinking that getting all depressed about a breakup when you've still got two lovely and supportive young ladies in your life, you need to understand polyamory. The support is wonderful, and I'm not alone. But breakups aren't any easier or less heartfelt just because you have other relationships.

    Glad the gas challenge worked. Another convert, lol.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    it's hard out there for a pimp
    As quoted by Luckyone:
    I asked directions from a genie in a bottle of jim beam and she lied to me.

    Methodus saved my life!

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    You might want to revise your signature looking for more women. I think you've got more than enough to handle easily there as it is.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    You might want to revise your signature looking for more women. I think you've got more than enough to handle easily there as it is.
    AJ and MM offered to come see me at the club, and their intent wasn't to procure more women. They're just friendly, cool people who are trying to enjoy themselves while showing the love for fellow industry people.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    AJ - Sorry you're going through all this. I don't have a lot of advice on being in a relationship with more than one person at a time (I could never do it - It's enough with my one honey-bunny who I love very much. I can't imagine having two!) but break up's suck no matter the circumstances.

    Be strong, and remember no matter how hard it hurts it WILL get better. That simple, well-known fact is so easy to forget when going through heart-ache.

    I hope you get all your insurance info figured out, it sounds like even though it might not be right now when you need it you will get some compinsation, eventually. I seriously empathize. My story (if you want to hear it); always had a bad-back, was in a car accident when I was 17 that aggravated it to hell and back. In the next 2 years it got progressively worse; stopped dancing, did PT, drug therapy, pain management shots/blocks in my spine and finally a spinal fusion.

    Of course, there was a suit going on with the insurance agency, but in the end it was decided that because it was 'pre-existing' there was nothing to be done. My medical insurance was wonderful, but still, health care is not cheap. And the time spent lolly-gagging on your ass it usually the worst part.

    Try and keep yourself occupied and your spirits up. Don't go chasing down any more girlfriends (ex or current) when frustrated!

    Take care!



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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Dude, that fucking blows.

    I recommend completely cutting GF #2 off. I know you say you have no intention of continuing to date her, but you're obviously still in touch with her. That will do you no favors. CUT HER OFF. Stop answering her phone calls or texts, maybe get a restraining order, maybe even sue her for damages. If an ex of mine pulled something like that I'd have no problem hauling his ass to court. But then, I have a thing about cars...nothing makes me angrier than people who fuck with cars to get back at someone. Seriously, the car didn't do anything. Leave the car out of it. My ex used to try to make me crash my car when I was driving to get me to agree to whatever his demands were at the time...it's blackmail, pure and simple. He would grab the wheel and everything.

    But seriously, stop talking to her. Let her go be with her new boyfriend. Get her OUT of your life and the lives of your other girls--who, let's face it, don't deserve to have to tolerate her bullshit just because you choose to.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Get well soon! Sorry to hear you're banged up.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    DJ - what Mediocrity said. The line about meeting other girls should maybe be worded differently? We have gone to see and buy daces from a few members here. If not for recent financial troubles, we would be doing so a lot more!

    Med - Thanks. *hug*

    4ever - Pretty much my story, minus the surgery. In NV, aggravation of a preexisting condition is a valid injury. Lucky for me I had an MRI of my lower back 4 months prior to the accident, and the one they took 2 months after showed a HUGE difference. They couldn't very well argue the point after that. They've been fighting me on treatment options and surgery though. Glad things worked out for you in the end!

    firemaiden - I hear ya. That's pretty much what I did. I am going to see her again before she leaves - I don't have a choice, she has to get her shit into a truck, lol. I will make the one attempt to end on a positive note though. I hate unnecessary anger and loose ends, I really do. About the car - that was largely my fault, not either of theirs. I lost my head and I paid the price. As depressed as I am about the car (very, lol, it's irreplaceable) I'm just glad nobody got hurt.

    mhi - and firemaiden as a PS - I came out of the crash completely unscathed. The direction of travel and angle of impact were such that the energy was directed across and through the rear end of the car - basically the whole back end was ripped off and the frame shifted sideways, but forward of the rear axle it was a sound and a little bump, no jarring or other sensation at all. Kind of surreal when I saw the damage.

    Thanks everyone, sorry for the whining, lol.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Quote Originally Posted by Almost Jaded View Post
    DJ - what Mediocrity said. The line about meeting other girls should maybe be worded differently? We have gone to see and buy daces from a few members here. If not for recent financial troubles, we would be doing so a lot more!
    That wasn't meant as a mod type suggestion, really, and was as much a joke as anything--though obviously in the extremely dry vein of humor. I had wondered way back when you first joined about the signature line, but you seemed pretty cool in your posts so didn't think anything much of it.

    If you want to meet dancers and spend money on them it's no skin off my back.

    And if you also want to meet other people, such as bartenders, managers, bouncers, DJs, etc. from the industry, such as has been suggested, it's not as easy to do as simply going to a club and having a few drinks.


    But whatever your siggy means, it's pretty obvious you don't need anymore girlfriends right now. I didn't mean to sound so unsympathetic.

    I got very little sympathy when I broke off an unconventional relationship of my own a few years back, and bitched about it to some friends. Looking back, I would have reacted the same way they did (I was just mildly disappointed they said 'What did you expect?' instead of 'Wow, sorry to hear you are unhappy about this.').
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Yesterday I spent some time with her in an effort to close things as well as possible. It mostly worked. Today she left for good, to Phoenix in a Uhaul. I am mostly numb but very depressed.

    So - how do you close out the worst week ever and deal with depression spiraling out of control?

    You declare DGAF and HANDLE THAT SHIT.

    I have never smoked weed, not once in my 35+ years. I RARELY drink - maybe 1-5 drinks a MONTH - if that. I have a massive painkiller Rx that I barely touch - my scrip is for 4 LorTab 10-500's a DAY and I go through between 5 and 10 a WEEK and even that is up from where it was.

    But tonight IDGAF.

    So - MM and I blew $140 on a bottle of my fav tequila, headed over to a guys house, and handled it. First time ever smokin in my life and I did it right; worked a connect and I was hitting the same shit Snoop and his boys get when they're in town and from the same guy, after 3 or 4 shots of Anejo over what was left of this afternoons pain pill

    and I got Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggghh as a muthafucka....

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Failed to update thread.

    Hours after that last post - while I was high in fact - I received a notice that a dear friend of many years was losing her fight with brain cancer and had 12-24 hours. She was dead in 23.

    RIP Bridgette Olson, you are missed by many.

    The hits just keep coming. I want off this ride.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Wow, I don't know what to say except I hope things get better. GF#2 sounds like she needs to be cut from your life right away because you don't need the additional stress. Sorry to hear about your friend's death. As for your accident, my dad had to deal with work comp many years ago so I definitely sympathize with your problem. Hopefully, that along with the other drama will work itself out.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    Quote Originally Posted by Almost Jaded View Post
    Failed to update thread.

    Hours after that last post - while I was high in fact - I received a notice that a dear friend of many years was losing her fight with brain cancer and had 12-24 hours. She was dead in 23.

    RIP Bridgette Olson, you are missed by many.

    The hits just keep coming. I want off this ride.
    Damn dude. Wow. I don't even know what to say- I'm sorry seems a little trite at this point.

    Thinking of you and MM.

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    Default Re: Worst week ever - AJ's emo thread, read a your own risk...

    The post about my friend dying was way late, that happened... Last Monday IIRC? This week the storm has calmed a bit, nothing big and scary and new anyway. Just a LOT of really, really bad depression.

    My lawyer found a way to - we THINK - keep the checks coming a little longer, we'll see if one shows up this coming Friday, lol.

    I MAY have found a way to get into a new car, pay off what they're not covering on the wrecked one, AND save a little (lower payment & APR). It involves a lot of moving money around and some trickiness, but it MIGHT work. We'll see.

    An out-of-town fuckbuddy called 36 hours ago and asked if she could crash with us for s few days. This might be the catalyst we need to let go of some things, have some fun, get back to enjoying what really is a great little hing we have going here. Again - we'll see.

    I forgot to mention - in the outbursts that firt night, 2 weeks ago now, GF#1 hurt her hand, too. Thought it was banged up. Turns out - over a week later - she's been icing it & complaining about it but not a lot so we let her deal with it - she got herself a little boxers fracture. Going to run up some bills getting THAT one fixed.

    MM is doing okay at the new club, GF#1 not so much. She's barely cleared house except for a few days in two weeks. We're really worried about her, it's a vicious cycle I've seen many times in my years in sales/sales management/sales training, and a hard one to break. The hand isn't helping, she's a big pole trick type and relies on that for a lot of her attention in the club. It's in her head - she is SOOOO hot, but her pitch has relied for years on guys approaching her on stage and she's having trouble adjusting her hustle.

    Anyway, other than fighting never ending depression, things are at least in a holding pattern. I'm trying to focus on the really good things in my life and on the girls, gt back to doing little things for them and trying to be the guy they love instead of a negative asshole, lol. It's helping.

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