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Thread: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

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    Member jasminebg's Avatar
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    Default How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    So I was just wondering cuz I know everyone has their bad days but you still gotta work, u feel good at first and after rejection after rejection etc. U don't want to give up so what do? What can you do to cheer yourself up? Cuz I'm at work trying and I'm not a bad looking girl I don't know what to do, err rant!
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    Veteran Member UwishUknewhy's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I drink....then I feel it. I'll also listen to music and pump myself up. Or just think of what you need, ie; money for rent, bills...

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    i dont think i ever feel it at all anymore, alcohol def helps tho, have a few shots
    **Stormy Wynter**

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    Before I used to not drink and I would just fake it until I made it. As far as going into work when you don't want to, I have a little story. One day I didn't feel like getting out of bed, my head hurt, I was tired, I was just not in the mood. I didn't want to stay in the house though cause it was a Friday and my friend wanted me to meet her so we could go to work together and I didn't want to ditch her. So I went. I was still miserable at first but on my last set, I got rained on with $800. That changed my outlook on stripping. You never know in this job when things can go from shitty to fucking amazing. After that, I started going to work whenever even if I would rather gauge my eyes out because you just don't know how it can go until the nights over.


    And then I left that club and went to this shit hole place were it was just never worth it. However, after having a long island or two, I could care less how miserable that place was. I was having a good time. Everybody was my friend in my drunken state. Since I'm a happy drunk, I did really good. I would go up to everybodyyyy and just say something funny or sexy and I did good that way. If I was sober at that club, I would literally sit in the dressing room until my set and plot everyones demise or try to come up with a way to escape without paying the house fee. Not saying you should become a drunk, but that worked for me in that horrible club.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    Just keep your mind on your goal. Even if that goal is just gas money to get back home.

    Sometimes I try to learn a new sales technique or skill. For instance, If I had never tried a doorknob close before, and I had just read an article about how to do an effective doorknob close, I would try that. (A doorknob close, btw, is when you have already turned away as if you were accepting defeat after not making a sale, then at the lat minute you turn back and throw in an extremely sweetened deal, catching the customer off guard with an offer he can't refuse.) Maybe it will work, maybe not, but at least it is something different to try, y'know? It helps break the monotony.

    IF you can afford it, you might buy a new outfit, or you could borrow one or dig an old favorite out of your closet. Maybe changing your hair and makeup will help you feel less in a rut.

    Hmmmm.....Do you have regular you can call to keep you company, even if he can't spend a lot? Or just a buddy? Sometimes having someone there who thinks highly of you will help improve your mood, or at least pass the time.


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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    Do you have regular you can call to keep you company, even if he can't spend a lot? Or just a buddy? Sometimes having someone there who thinks highly of you will help improve your mood, or at least pass the time.
    This is a good tip, and works especially well with a regular who understands that you'll have to bolt if money walks in the door. Last Tuesday, I was feeling pretty shitty, but then I had a few drinks (just Diet Coke these days since I quit drinking!) with my favorite regular. It re-inflated my confidence, and I went on to have a fabulous night money-wise.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    If I am having a bad night, Ill find the cutest guy in the club and just flirt my ass off with him. Or Ill find a not-so-bad looking guy who is full of compliments (if not so much money) and flirt with him for a pick-me-up.

    Ill re-read some good threads on hustling. That helps.

    Sometimes, Ill just mentally re-live some awesome moments and tell myself postivie affirmations. "Im a fucking rock star" is one of my faves. That can pick up my mood as well.

    THink about why I am there, why I need the money. Maybe take a short break.

    It's a really really bad night when all of these tactics have been tried and failed. Then I may just as well go home early since I won't be making any money with that suck-ass attitutde.
    "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories -Stainslaw J. Lec

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    Featured Member Natalllia's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    If you're in the middle of a shift, and you're dealing with that "rejection after rejection" feeling, give yourself a little break. Go to the DR, sit down, fix your makeup, maybe change your outfit, and just be good to yourself for 10 minutes (or however long you need). When you start feeling really aggravated and don't want to be there, they can almost smell it on you, and it's going to be that much harder to sell dances. If you give yourself as many little breaks as you need to feel a little mentally and physically refreshed, you might actually make more $$ than if you were spending all your time on the floor trying to hustle through the burnout.
    "I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them"
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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I second reminding yourself of your goals. If you want to buy a house do a search for homes available in your area and start day dreaming about putting your furniture in. If you wanna travel look up some of the area attractions and places to stay. Shallow, but I've said to myself after I make enough tonight I am going to buy a new purse or sunglasses or something like that and I've made way more than the cost because it's motivating and such an easier attainable goal than a long term one.

    I can bribe myself with food. Order in or pick up something delicious and special on the way so you can look forward to a nice dinner break after your first stage set. I push myself to try to make back the cost of my meal before eating so that while it's early and dead I can go up to every guy in there and shake out what I can from them.

    Find or call in a buddy who will pep you up and feed off of their positive energy. Just don't sit too long or else you'll be mad at yourself for spending too much time for not enough money. If they're the chatty but probably not gonna do dances type I drop obvious tongue in cheek hints that I expect money from them. I'll also take a couple of breaks from them to give them the chance to up n leave if they don't plan on paying up or for another girl to make money.. don't want to camp out there, it's good for nobody.

    I have a folder in my locker with some awesome closing lines organized by situations. If I'm having a string of rejections and starting to feel like I'm the only one not making money I'll go reread them and pick a few to use. Go back to the floor, hit up any fresh faces, then return to some maybe later guys with a fresh new attitude.

    Drinking is a slippery slope so just be cautious! Sometimes I get too drunk that I just want to have fun and forget to hustle. That or the tiniest things set me off into raging bitch mode. And that usually has happened on the nights when I get there and the first thing I think when I hit the floor is that I need a drink to make it more interesting. So much better to think who's gonna buy your new car or a night at the resort you wanna stay at or a class at university than who's gonna get you a $12 drink.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    Drinking is a slippery slope so just be cautious! Sometimes I get too drunk that I just want to have fun and forget to hustle. That or the tiniest things set me off into raging bitch mode. And that usually has happened on the nights when I get there and the first thing I think when I hit the floor is that I need a drink to make it more interesting. So much better to think who's gonna buy your new car or a night at the resort you wanna stay at or a class at university than who's gonna get you a $12 drink.
    Agreed. If I start drinking, I usually either end up getting really lazy and just sitting with guys who are getting me drunk but not giving me money, and/or getting really depressed. Drinking on the job can make you take rejection even more personally! One of the many reasons I've (successfully thus far) quit drinking at work.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I try to walk around smiling. Even if I actually feel like killing everyone in the club, making myself force a smile starts to put me in a better mood. I sometimes do this outside the club too. My emotions follow suite to my smile, I guess. Plus guys love a girl who is constantly smiling.

    I also remind myself that there is absolutely no way of telling what the night is going to bring until I hustle. Even if I'm not feeling it, it might just be my lucky night.

    I remember one Saturday night I went to work when was on my period, hungover, and exhausted. I was in a horrible mood until I approached a customer who ended up spending $1300 on me for giving him half assed dances and he didn't even talk to me or try to touch me entire time. I also got one of my favorite kinds of customers that night.. the ones who like you to beat the shit out of them ! I made 2 grand that night. Needless to say, I was sure glad I dragged my ass into work! You just never know what's going to happen.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I agree. sometimes you get lucky. I did a CR with a guy who I was actually kind of rude to. I went up to him all smiley and fake trying to see if he wanted a dance and during the lap dance he said something stupid so I rolled my eyes and ignored him and then he asked me if I could do a CR with him since I was "so sweet" and he was being serious!! o_O

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    If possible, I take the next day off to pamper myself.

    If I'm at work I cool off in the dressing room. Look at tons of lolcat pictures I downloaded onto my phone, chat with a friend, surf the internet/facebook. Anything to turn my mood back around.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I find a nice quiet spot to sit, talk to a trusted friend or go reapply my make up and freshen up my hair.

    Sometimes I even ask guys for dances.




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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    It can be very frustrating when no one seems to want you. The one thing I DON'T recommend is drinking. I've seen many girls over the years who need to drink in order to work, and trust me, you don't want to be the desperate, drunk girl.

    Take a break and freshen up. Change your outfit. We had one girl who would put on a wig and be someone totally new. This made her money on more than one occasion.

    Instead of trying to sell dances how about just hanging out with someone who's cool to talk to. Waste some time just having fun and maybe it will catch on and people will start buying dances from the fun girl

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I put evry single bill around my walls with envelops of money to pay off. i get up..i look at them, i walk-in i see them, i walk-out and it's damn i need to pay that

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    Sometimes u just need a break. For me its a little difficult bc I am scheduled monthly. I am experiencing high burn out. And when u take a month off people start questioning why did she leave? etc Im not so worried about that. I was telling my regular the other night that it wasnt that I hate my job, it was just that almost every night there was no one n the club. I am talking several nights where there are 3-6 customers n the bar. Truth is these are some of the better places to dance n the area. The economy has killed business in this area. This is a military town and alot of the military is currently deployed bc of all the current middle east bs. So its deadd. And it isnt just for me. At another nice club n the area a girl complained that she worked 6 hours on a fri night and walked out w $50. Mind u these are mostly bikini bars w no lap dances...

    Its harddd to stay motivated for me personally bc when I go in and see that its going to be another $50 night for me its just depressing..The state of everything is depressing..But I have to keep going and I cant afford to take time off. Tonight I am going to go in and smile as much as I can despite the horrible almost insulting money situation. I will tell u it brings me down knowing that money just two years ago was twice if not three times more on avg. Ive had many times when I wonder if its just me but I see others struggling as well..Im not alone n this...

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I travel to dance ( sometimes a few hours / sometimes further ) so I focus on my weekly money goal. If I have a couple amazing nights and can make my goal in two days ..... that means I can have the next 5 off ! If it takes me 3 ..... ok ..... I have 4 days to myself that week. If it takes 4 days..... grrr ..... not happy but I still am able to make my goal usually.
    I would feel " frozen " with dancing because of the ups and downs with money and tried that technique ..... just telling myself " I WILL make xzy amount on this trip " . It doesn't matter if it takes 2 days or 3 or 4 . It does take some effort of my part to talk myself out of being angry on a low earning night. On high earning nights, I feel really excited. I'm trying to take some of the emotional up and down out of dancing and if I "know" I'll bring the amount I want home, this helps.

    I'm speaking from the perspective of having three months off from dancing recently and missing the money. My little break was much needed because I hated dancing three months ago. If it gets under my skin and drives me nuts again, I'll bail again until I miss the money and come back like I have 3-4 times already haha.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    I tell myself " C'mon .... go.... you'll make $100 most likely and possibly much more ! " . Before .... I would literally get frozen and hung up on the idea that I might drive 3 hours / work 8 / drive three back and only make a $100 profit after gas / club fee / tips outs which DOES happen sometimes. So .... I just tried to absord the fact that it might happen ..... but I also KNOW that if I stick in and do a couple more days, the chance of it happening 2-3 days in a row is not that likely.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    Another trick I use it that I'll tell myself " I'm just going to stay in town until I get my dancer RUSH ". I'll literally stay until I catch at least one high spending customer or moment where I go " wheee stripping is fun " . I know I'll catch these little gems but that it sometimes take awhile . Having things take awhile is really hard for me because I don't have very much patience.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    sometimes I call up some of my friends at work to see if they'll be there. that way if the night sucks I at least have somebody to talk to. Maybe I'll go online and motivate myself with things I could buy if I had more money.

    I also like to remind myself that something unexpected could happen that I might need money for. My car could break down, I might get pregnant (even though I'm on birth control it could still happen), a relative who lives far away might get sick and I'd have to go fly out to see them, etc. I want to have at least $5000 in the bank at some point that I don't touch. It's always good to be prepared for whatever life throws at you.

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    Default Re: How do you deal with not "feeling it" but still need to work

    also you could use school as a motivator. you obviously don't want to dance for your whole life since it's one of the hardest jobs to motivate yourself for and the money is NOT guaranteed. even if college isn't your thing, you might want to get some kind of training at some point. a bartending course is like 500 bucks. those 10 month medical certificate programs cost a few grand. even if you're not sure where you're headed NOW you want to have your options open for the future.

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