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    Default So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    So this is basically my intro to the forum and little info on my situation. First I love this forum. I think all the women here seem very intelegent and business savvy. My kind of people I have already learnt so much and now have a different opion on the adult industry. Particularly escorting.

    A little about me: I started camming a little over two months ago and am looking at going indie and expanding in other directions ands this forum is full of information.

    Now to the frustrating part. I currently work forty hours a week at a manual labor job and my higher ups seem to be constantly blocking every way to promotion so I started camming. I make way more camming then my full-time job but have no time for it because of how many hours I have to put in to my full time job and the fact that they only let me work third shift and I am tired as fuck when I get off. My fiancé won't let me quit and go into camming full-time bc "it's not a real job" in his opinion. Now I don't mean to say that in such a way that he is controlling more that we are a couple and we have to agree on finical matters, and I would be sacrificing a steady paycheck for commission type work. The only thing is that I also suffer from depression and anxiety so working so much at a job I hate then coming home and working again is sending me on a downward spiral that I want I get out of. Without my camming we wouldn't have money for all of our bills but all this work is killing me.

    Sorry to unload all this on y'all. But thanks for letting me join this forum. I hope to learn alot and contribute as well.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Reading your post my heart goes out to you. But I think you already know what you need to do...

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    "My finance won't let you quit" implies that he IS controlling you. You should stop making excuses for him. If he does not want you to quit, tell him to get off his ass and pay the bills!

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    ^ agreed.

    what about going part time at your job? that way you have some guaranteed cash but more time/energy to hustle.

    good luck!

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by TouringGirlfriend View Post
    "My finance won't let you quit" implies that he IS controlling you. You should stop making excuses for him. If he does not want you to quit, tell him to get off his ass and pay the bills!



    This.


    If this was the old days (you know...black-and-white t.v. and whatnot...), the woman would be expected to "obey" her man and do whatever the fuck he tells her to do. But FUCK THAT SHIT...it's 2011 and women are more independent nowadays.

    It's best for you to resolve this issue with your fiance now before you two get married. And you're a grown woman. He doesn't have to "let" you do anything. Good luck, hun. *HUGS*
    My referral link for models to join the Boleyn Models daily pay program
    https://cammodelpay.com/ref?page=&campaign=&affToken=NDcx

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by MissJenny View Post
    I make way more camming then my full-time job
    There is your answer.

    You're already making more. No need to continue killing yourself at a job you hate.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Corporate America fucks everyone over. At least, in porn I know when it is going to happen. hehe My personal philosophy.

    In today's world we are all working our asses off to pay the bills. I cam, blog, promote, marketing, shoot porn and such. Figured I have 3 jobs here.

    Does he work 2 jobs? Because He can't ask you to do 2 jobs if he is only working 40 hours a week and expect you to be the main income earner with a fulltime job and camming.

    Economy has knocked most people for a loop. No sense in getting down about it.

    Wishing you tons of luck. Go with your gut.

    Good Luck,
    Sam

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Thank y'all for all your responses and I would of quit already if I didn't have any doubts about this path. I think I'm going to try and transition into full time camming. Set myself a schedule and save up every penny so I have enough for 2 months bills. When he realizes how much time this is taking from me I think I will confront him and drop to part time with bennefits (20hrs a week) increase cammig time and then when I can afford independent insurance drop my labor job all together. It's starting to nt be so much about the money but more about how my labor job makes me so depressed and anxious and sucks up all my free time.
    Y'all are awesome and I appreciate all of your responses

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    The ups and downs of camming can be VERY scary.
    One day you might be making 50 a hour , then the next week
    cant make 50 a day!
    Make sure your good At camming before you quit your guaranteed income.
    Make sure you can handle it full time.
    Make sure you wont get burnt of after pulling 2 week full time shifts.

    If you burn out , and all you have for your bills is camming , and you cant even stand the
    thought of logging on , Your screwed!


    Best of luck , Much love! You'll figure everything out in time <3
    Americanmade18 on most sites.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by MissJenny View Post
    My fiancé won't let me quit and go into camming full-time bc "it's not a real job" in his opinion. Now I don't mean to say that in such a way that he is controlling more that we are a couple and we have to agree on finical matters, and I would be sacrificing a steady paycheck for commission type work.
    As opposed to right now ,where you are sacrificing Big$$ commission type work , for a shitty pay check :-)

    If he's not controlling you , then he can't 'not let you quit' .. He can disagree with your decision - and you can go right ahead and prove him wrong . If you feel you can make more $ with less work , then it's your risk , if you try and fail, well then he has every right to boot you in the bum . But there's no reason things would come to that, based on your current cam experience and financial analysis .

    Anyway , You're a big girl now, and as TG said - if he 'won't allow' you to work in the way YOU want, then he should provide the $$ to subsidies his wish .....

    I noticed that he's not , forbidding you , based on the fact he doesn't want you in the sex industry , if his opinion laid there, it would be another kettle of fish , and I would expect you to at least compromise on a conclusion.... but that's not the case, he doesn't want you to sack your shitty job in , because he doesn't believe YOUR opinion that you can make more than you can in your shitty job ..... You need to prove to him otherwise, failing that , you'll have to continue your shitty job ,and trying to make ends meet .

    How about cutting down those hours , and putting more cam hours in ? Or perhaps take a holiday from your current job , and prove to both him and yourself , that camming IS going to work out for you financially .

    Either way ... Best of luck .

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Sorry Miss J , I was typing my above post, while you were in the process of typing your response to your initial posters... Disregard if necessary .

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by MissJenny View Post
    So this is basically my intro to the forum and little info on my situation. First I love this forum. I think all the women here seem very intelegent and business savvy. My kind of people I have already learnt so much and now have a different opion on the adult industry. Particularly escorting.

    A little about me: I started camming a little over two months ago and am looking at going indie and expanding in other directions ands this forum is full of information.

    Now to the frustrating part. I currently work forty hours a week at a manual labor job and my higher ups seem to be constantly blocking every way to promotion so I started camming. I make way more camming then my full-time job but have no time for it because of how many hours I have to put in to my full time job and the fact that they only let me work third shift and I am tired as fuck when I get off. My fiancé won't let me quit and go into camming full-time bc "it's not a real job" in his opinion. Now I don't mean to say that in such a way that he is controlling more that we are a couple and we have to agree on finical matters, and I would be sacrificing a steady paycheck for commission type work. The only thing is that I also suffer from depression and anxiety so working so much at a job I hate then coming home and working again is sending me on a downward spiral that I want I get out of. Without my camming we wouldn't have money for all of our bills but all this work is killing me.

    Sorry to unload all this on y'all. But thanks for letting me join this forum. I hope to learn alot and contribute as well.

    Ever thought about contracting overseas? I 've done it before, and I am about to do it again... around 11,000 a month tax free with the right qualifications. PM me for specifics. If you want.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Also, make sure you're capable of being self-motivated and very disciplined. It's easy to work hard 40 hours a week when you have a boss breathing down your neck. It's not so easy getting on cam when you've been laying in your pajamas all day and you think you look fat and you "just don't feel like it" and your favorite TV show is about to come on. If you think this won't happen to you, it will.

    My worst enemy is my own laziness/procrastination, if I actually put in 40 hours a week I'd be freaking LOADED.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by Amy Lee View Post
    Ever thought about contracting overseas? I 've done it before, and I am about to do it again... around 11,000 a month tax free with the right qualifications. PM me for specifics. If you want.
    If he won't let her cam, do you think he'd let her leave the country? He could throw a fit over that as well unless he's able to go out of the country with her . Yeah leaving the country is a big step for anyone.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    I think after working a 40 hour week in a shitty job , the motivation to work hard on cam is only a memory away - All you have to do is think back to the hell that was the minimum wage . When I feel myself slacking or complaining , I think about what my alternatives are , and they're not pretty !

    Although I agree with the OP's decision to ease herself in slowly , drop your hours at work as your cam income picks up ... keep going until you reach 0 hours for your boss and 40 hours a week on cam , and to quote smurfette - You'll be minted :-P

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Proceed with caution honey! When I first started camming I truly did enjoy it, but now it seems to be a dead end job, with NO BENEFITS, NO RETIREMENT, NO PAID VACATIONS. It certainly has its perks and is easy, fast money, but that is all it is. Most people get in to get OUT as soon as possible. There are the career cammers like I, but I know I am not reaching my full potential. I suffer from more anxiety and stress now then I ever did with a normal job. Camming has many up's but just as many downs. I am not trying to discourage you, just my share of the cold hard truth coming from someone who left a good job to get into the adult business. I must admit I kind of feel trapped now, after many years in the adult industry. My only way out is to create my own job aka own my own business, I am inhirable at other jobs after my lack of job experience and notoriety.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    P.S I dont think her bf is controlling. If anyone who claims to love you does not express that they are concerned about you joining the adult industry, then they should definately be dumped because they dont give a fuck! My bf had real concerns about my camming and where it may lead me (escorting, porn etc) but he was not trying to control me at all, the decision was mine to make and once he saw what it was all about, that I was safe and making money, he loved the thought

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by MissJenny View Post
    So this is basically my intro to the forum and little info on my situation. First I love this forum. I think all the women here seem very intelegent and business savvy. My kind of people I have already learnt so much and now have a different opion on the adult industry. Particularly escorting.

    A little about me: I started camming a little over two months ago and am looking at going indie and expanding in other directions ands this forum is full of information.

    Now to the frustrating part. I currently work forty hours a week at a manual labor job and my higher ups seem to be constantly blocking every way to promotion so I started camming. I make way more camming then my full-time job but have no time for it because of how many hours I have to put in to my full time job and the fact that they only let me work third shift and I am tired as fuck when I get off. My fiancé won't let me quit and go into camming full-time bc "it's not a real job" in his opinion. Now I don't mean to say that in such a way that he is controlling more that we are a couple and we have to agree on finical matters, and I would be sacrificing a steady paycheck for commission type work. The only thing is that I also suffer from depression and anxiety so working so much at a job I hate then coming home and working again is sending me on a downward spiral that I want I get out of. Without my camming we wouldn't have money for all of our bills but all this work is killing me.

    Sorry to unload all this on y'all. But thanks for letting me join this forum. I hope to learn alot and contribute as well.
    I understand where you're coming from. When you live together, money matters are often handled jointly - what one does directly affects the other, for good or worse. My boyfriend wasn't keen on the idea of me giving up my full time job for camming, but as it turned out, that was what was MEANT to happen. I did quit, but because I had another part time job on the side. I planned to cam a couple of hours a week to make around £50 extra. Well blow me if I didn't make £50 in under an hour LMAO. Needless to say, the boyfriend soon came around to the idea when he saw my bank balance soar, an when i'd done it for a few weeks solid he knew i was serious and would put effort in to keep it up. I soon quit the part time day job and turned to camming full time (not even full time - i probably work 16 hours per week max).

    BUT, I would recommend not giving up your current job FOR camming.. because you don't even know yet if you are suited to it. Or if you can put in enough time and effort to make a living from it. You are best off finding a part time job, or a one off job that makes you a quick wad of cash (like a promotions or modelling gig for a day) whih can bide you a bit of time. Then use that time to try out camming.

    Good luck

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by TouringGirlfriend View Post
    "My finance won't let you quit" implies that he IS controlling you.
    I tend to disagree with this... if you lived with your SO, would you really let them quit a steady paying job in this economy (what? everyone else uses that! LOL) for something with no guaranteed income when you're barely scraping by?


    You could look for a different vanilla job so that you can still have your steady pay check, but be less stressed out since you won't be working at a job you hate.
    Or show him logs demonstrating that the number of hours you cam vs the income you make seems to indicate that the 40 hours you spend at your other job could be better spent camming since you make more per hour on cam. That would go a long way towards convincing me!
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by cyberstripper View Post
    P.S I dont think her bf is controlling. If anyone who claims to love you does not express that they are concerned about you joining the adult industry, then they should definately be dumped because they dont give a fuck! My bf had real concerns about my camming and where it may lead me (escorting, porn etc) but he was not trying to control me at all, the decision was mine to make and once he saw what it was all about, that I was safe and making money, he loved the thought
    There is a difference between 'showing concern' , and 'not allowing' someone to do something. The former is guiding someone in the right direction, the latter is shoving them down it ...

    If anyone disallowed me from making any decision, I would class it as being controlled - If they gave me their opinion and then let me make my mind up based on that - then that would be another story .
    In the OP's case, the fact it's the adult industry doesn't seem to be the bfs problem , it seems as she stated, down to the fact it's not a guaranteed income - In which case, in my opinion , it's a risk up to her to take . (unless of course he has the finances to see her right )

    Missy
    Last edited by ukmissy; 05-20-2011 at 08:42 PM. Reason: typos

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by DesuvsDeath View Post
    I tend to disagree with this... if you lived with your SO, would you really let them quit a steady paying job in this economy (what? everyone else uses that! LOL) for something with no guaranteed income when you're barely scraping by?


    You could look for a different vanilla job so that you can still have your steady pay check, but be less stressed out since you won't be working at a job you hate.
    Or show him logs demonstrating that the number of hours you cam vs the income you make seems to indicate that the 40 hours you spend at your other job could be better spent camming since you make more per hour on cam. That would go a long way towards convincing me!
    Like I said, she should tell HIM to pick up a new shift or a new job. If he has such a problem with it, he (as a man) will do everything he can to make sure his soon to be wife does not have to expose herself on the internet or he would pick up the bills for awhile while she finds a better paying mainstream job.

    YES him telling her NOT to quit implies that he is controlling her technically. It's very easy to sugarcoat it. If he is not the one doing the work, then why does he have a say? Why would he force her to do something she doesn't want to?

    So answer to your question: NO. I would never force my "SO" to do anything he didn't want to KNOWING it makes him unhappy.

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    For the rest of you: I will say it again. What do you call forcing someone you "love" to do something that clearly makes them unhappy? Do I need to spell it out. Obviously this man has some issues and it's not with her but himself!

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    We are only reading one side of the story. So who knows what reasons he is for and against camming over a so-called regular job. We are only getting her side of the story.

    In today's economy, no job is secure. Many regular companies are going under & laying off employees. So no job is a secure job, wether it be corporate America or camming. It is all a crap shoot.


    What I don't get is why so many girls on this forum let their BF's decide how they think of themselves and the careers they chose to do.

    I find that very sad.

    There is no guarantee's in life. No matter what she chooses.

    Good Luck,
    Sam

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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    What I don't get is why so many girls on this forum let their BF's decide how they think of themselves and the careers they chose to do.
    Me either...


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    Default Re: So frustrated I could cry. Plus intro to forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post

    What I don't get is why so many girls on this forum let their BF's decide how they think of themselves and the careers they chose to do.

    I find that very sad.

    There is no guarantee's in life. No matter what she chooses.

    Good Luck,
    Sam
    Thank you, Thank you, THANK YOU.

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