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Thread: Why is leaving so damn hard?

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    Default Why is leaving so damn hard?

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    Last edited by HighHeelHottie; 12-16-2011 at 07:40 AM.

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    Default Re: Why is leaving so damn hard?

    I'm totally horrible at break-ups, I'll say that up-front. Generally the only thing that made it easier for me is if we get into a huge fight I'll get mad enough to say that its over... then just leave the house. Of course "sticking" to it is the real problem & can be harder depending on if the place is shared (both names on any legal papers where you live), you live with him, or he lives with you. I've actually never been in a situation where both of our names were on a house... learned my lesson about co-signing on anything with anyone REALLY early on. Anyhow, if I'm living with the guy normally I've found what is best is just to have friends come over the very next day & help me move, which keeps my anxiety down & makes it harder for him to try to smooth things over with me. If he's living with me, then generally I'll just say what date he needs to be out by & I'll leave the home until that day... just going back when I know he's not there. Honestly though, my worst problem is that I'm just a naturally calm person & I don't like to be alone. I have a tendency to stay in relationships for 1-2 years after I already know the person will never be able to restore my faith in them. It just tends to take me seeing their worst quality re-shown to me for things to really sink in.

    I will say this though, I know multiple people who have divorced & re-married the same person years later... including someone here on SW. If he really loves you he will understand my his bad habit is hurting the relationship, & that he has to change it if he wants you back. Plus, sometimes the thing a person needs is to leave the other in order to forget the bad things, to heal, & then to be left with more of the good memories than the bad... at which point you may someday be able to get back together.
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