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Thread: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

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    Sad Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    I stripped for about 6 months last year and was just horrible. (The most I ever made was $120. And that's because the guy asked me for a VIP and tipped really well. I did no work.) I didn't hustle. I'm a real cute girl, and in good shape... but I just never caught on to the "working for money" thing. I always depended on my looks.
    So I discovered the world of escorting and found that it was more "looks" than "hustle"...
    I'm out of that now and much happier, but I really want to give stripping another try!
    I auditioned at my old club (Deja Vu) and got the contract.... That was last Wednesday... I have yet to go in and work a shift. I spend hours on my hair and makeup. I get myself all pumped up. Then around 6 or 7, I start to back out. I make up lame excuses as to why not go, and I end up staying home. Last night was so horrible I even cried because I just didn't want to go.
    But WHY?? It's not a horrible industry! It's MUCH better than escorting (mentally, maybe not financially)!!
    When I danced, I found it much easier when I carpooled with another girl. She made the drive there fun. And I never felt "alone" at the club. I guess having a friend made it easier?? But I'm not there to make friends.. I'm there for money.
    I think I might be afraid to work because maybe because I'm afraid of failing again. I'm afraid of rejection. In escorting, you post the ad and men come to you...

    Has anybody ever had this problem? Do all dancers go through this phase? Any words of encouragement? Any tactics you use to get yourself in the mood?

    Thank you girls! I'm determined to be a damn good dancer... I just need to get out of this rut.

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Many of us postpone getting ourselves to the club when we are new or when we've taken a break from dancing. It can be really hard to get back into the swing of things. Did you have to buy a liscence? cause that normally motivates me to get my ass down to the club. If you're only making $120/nt you should read Hustle Hut, take a stripping course, or maybe move to another club. If you have trouble approaching custys try just smiling to them when you're onstage or walking around the club so that they think you are friendly and approachable.

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    No I didnt need a license. I just auditioned and got a contract... I know theres money at this club. I see girls cash out with $400+... I really do have a "shy" problem. But i'm determined to break my shell this time and just become another person.
    I'm reading hustle hut everyday! I just need to get my ass to the club :/

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    I dont know any pole tricks, so I'm usually insecure after getting off stage. I feel like guys would rather get a dance from a girl who's flipping upside down, rather than a girl just shaking her ass on a pole...
    There are girls at the club who actually look HAPPY to be there... I want to be happy to go to work too :/

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    mmm, it took me a really long time to "get used to" dancing when i started. i used to feel very much like you described.

    if you are determined to dance, then keep your commitment to yourself. which means practice makes perfect. which means showing up every day, for every shift you intend to work, and talking to every customer, and learning how to sell, learning how to control your show, befriending top earners and asking them for mentorship and advice, being observant of body language, and the real kicker, which a good deal of women in the industry seem to forget, is knowing that you are worth MUCH more. don't question if someone thinks you're work $20 a dance of $1600/hr in the champagne room or any of that bullshit. you are. stop fighting it.

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    Veteran Member Italian_Bombshell849's Avatar
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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Babee, the way you have written your last couple of posts you come off as if you have some self esteem, self worth, and courage issues. I can't say I think the highest of myself, but I DEFINITELY think high enough of myself to be like, "I don't need to be Miss Pole Dance America to look hot and make money!" and I too escorted. I never went through an agency or had a pimp, I did it through sugar daddy dating sites. Much easier I felt. ANYWAY, it appears your sense of low self worth and low self esteem are getting in the way. Perhaps you need to take a step back and go aerial and look at the whole panting, not just on a focus point of the portrait. There seems to be some underlying hesitations...like a "I want to go do this full force...but then again...I might not be as good as the other girls." Just because they can work a pole doesn't mean anything. Pole tricks are NOT a necessity of stripping. They are simply fun things to do! SOME clubs (usually urban clubs) have a stronger need for terrific stage shows and pole work, but I am guessing Deja Vu is not an urban club and that pole work is not needed. Have you thought about the fact that your confidence is so low that you are not radiating a "I want to be here! Look at me! I am HOT!" vibe to the customers? Also, you have to understand that stripping is NOT like escorting in the sense that you can just let the men come to you. It took me getting used to dancing when I came back from escorting too. You're not the only one!! *hugs* Dancing requires confidence in yourself, confidence in your hustle, and confidence in your stage shows to, as I have said, "radiate vibes" to the customers who will then be amazed at the beautiful, sweet, and confident WOMAN (not girl, girl takes away from the "I am stripper woman! Hear me RAWR!" factor) that stands or sits or dances before them. Men want to spend money on a girl that is not acting desperate for money or who is not a wallflower. Men go to SCs to party and have fun, just like escorting, and you get to party and have fun right there with them. No, they might not pay you hundreds per hour to bone them...which, in a club, is a good thing because then you're labeled an extras girl and that is like a tattoo once you're in the club circuit and word gets around......but they are paying for your time and you to share sexy moments and companionship with them.

    Look at it like this, you ARE worth every man in the club's money. You ARE a courageous, strong willed, and intelligent woman who is ambitious and will stop at nothing to get what she wants in life...and right now what you apparently want is to go back to dancing. Just go do it. It might seem tough to believe and "just go do it" but what have you got to lose? You don't want to go back to escorting do you? You meet some really weird ones when you're escorting...and you don't have a club bouncer or manager to keep you at least semi-safe. You and I are lucky to be alive. Some of those men are like the Craigslist Killer and would meet you, get you into the hotel room, and slit your throat or torture you to death....I was almost trafficked into Mexico as a sex slave. We all have our stories. That is why I look at dancing and am like, "If I survived escorting, dancing is a cake walk. I can do this. Escorting showed me what I'm made of...".

    So now, Babee, it's time to see what you're made of.
    You think you got what it takes? You already basically sold your pussy for hundreds of dollars an hour...dancing is definitely NOT that hardcore. Just treat dancing like a business and not a party or hobby. It is your bread and butter. Be smart. Be in control of the situation, unlike escorting.

    You can do this!!
    "You are the church, I am the steeple. when we fuck we're all God's people." - "Slutgarden" by Marilyn Manson

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Grow some brass ones. Stop whining. If you're happier escorting stick with it. Stripping isn't for everyone, neither is escorting.

    If you have shyness, self esteem issues, whatever get over them. This isn't an industry for the timid.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Italian Bombshell... Thanks so much! Those are just the exact words I needed to hear! It feels amazing to know that somebody actually understands and gets where I'm coming from! I can't thank you enough!!
    I'm feeling totally confident now and ready to ROCK tomorrow... but that could all change like 2 hours before my shift..

    But Tempest is right.. I need to grow some brass ones. I can't be the little shy girl afraid of the big bad scary custy. In all honesty at first your words seemed super harsh and I was lie "WTF".. but now I really need to thank you! Totally the push I needed.

    And Camille. Great advice!

    I totally love this site.

    Thanks guys!!

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    I'm the same way. I'm not a mega hustler and I definitely do better at lower-hustle clubs where my 'looks' do all the work for me. I do feel like lower hustle clubs are in the minority these days so unless you wanna go searching for some--which could involve a lot of traveling--you should start thinking of stripping as what it is: a sales gig. It's just like any other sales job; it's all about making the customer want what you're selling(in this case the product is YOU). Study the stickies in the hustle hut.

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    It takes balls (what Tempest said), confidence, and WORK to be a stripper. If you don't WORK you won't make money. I work my ass off EVERY NIGHT, and trust me honey it's not my pole tricks selling dances it's my hustle. Some of the highest earning girls in my club don't even go on stage. You have to study selling tips and advice and USE THEM at work. You won't make it unless you are dedicated to working for it.

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    It can be intimidating going back to work after a break, but you just have to remind yourself that you only have to do the first day back once. That's the first hurdle, and you just have to get it out of the way. You already have the benefit of knowing the club, which is a plus.
    It feels stupid but spend some time in front of the mirror, flirt, do sexy poses, put on some sexy and uplifting music and dance in front of the mirror. A few hip wiggles can put you in that 'I'm SO fucking SEXY!!!' mood in such a short time.

    And when you get to work, yet again, it's just a matter of getting the first hurdle out of the way. Pick a customer that you don't think is a local/regular, go approach him and have a warm-up conversation. Don't expect anything to cone if it, but dint leave him without asking for a dance. If he says no, smile and tell him that if he changes his mind you'll be around. I ALWAYS consider the first attempt to be a practise. It can feel so awkward and forced, but I don't beat myself up about it if it's terrible, as I know that's out the way now and I'm back in work mode. Sometimes it works out though, so ALWAYS lay the cards on the table and ask if he'd like a dance.

    But yeah, try and take it one step at a time, because it really gets so much better after each little hurdle. As the others have said, read Hustle Hut and don't be too hard on yourself. I bet you're much better at hustling than you let on

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    You are not alone Babee! I'm transitioning back into dancing as well so thank you for posting this...GREAT advice ItalianBombshell and Camille!

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Just don't dance. You're inflicting mental torture on yourself by doing things you don't want to do. Because deep in there, if you really enjoyed it, you'd be pumped to go in, even if you were nervous. You'd be pumped to make the money and try new things..... I hope I'm not crucified for this statement. But to me it just seems like you're not fit for it & you sincerely are not ready or willing. Don't do it to yourself..... Whenever I go in and I just don't feel like it at all, I feel like shit the whole night and don't make money... Try something else. I'm going to start bartending soon because I'm fed up with dancing. I felt that regretful feeling in the pit of my stomach too many times. So now I am transitioning gradually away from it until it's a thing of the past.
    Quote Originally Posted by xxxtc View Post
    MEN - poorly designed creatures

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    If you are having this much of a negative reaction to it, then i cannot imagine this industry being for you. Hell, it might only be more harmful than helpful to you in the long run if it is causing you this much stress & anxiety before you can even jump in. Having an outgoing personality is one of the main staples in this industry otherwise your severely handicapped.

    It seems that you might need a more experienced stripper to take you under her wing to help & encourage you alittle, unfortunately your not gonna be able to find that if you don't at least get your butt in the club. Especially, considering that most dancers tend not to pay attention or are standoffish of new girls for awhile.

    Your just gonna have to change this. "Be the change you wish to seek" -Ghandi
    "You're better than no one and no one is better than you."
    -- Bob Dylan

    “There's never going to be a great misunderstanding of me. I think I'm a little whacked.”


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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by BabeeC View Post
    But WHY?? It's not a horrible industry! It's MUCH better than escorting (mentally, maybe not financially)!!
    Ok, don't do this. Don't compare the two, because obviously stripping is a step above escorting (don't argue with me about this, just my opinion). And you're right, it's not a horrible industry, but it can be VERY mentally and physically taxing, especially if you're not in the right mind frame. I think people in the mainstream believe that strippers just walk in a club, shake a little bit on stage, and make 1000 dollars. There is grueling self-examining that goes on in a strip club. Customers are rude, girls hate you for no reason and steal, managers are dicks. Sure, you can make money and it can be fun, but not if you are already feeling inadequate, insecure, worried, etc. Don't just do it because it's better than escorting. That's like saying shooting someone is better than poisoning them. They are different evils. Do it because you want to, and because you feel motivated by the money. Not because you feel boxed into a corner. That's going to create resentment.

    Quote Originally Posted by BabeeC View Post
    But I'm not there to make friends.. I'm there for money.
    Also, don't do THAT to yourself. Don't take comforts away because you think you're not supposed to have them. That's bullshit. You can't avoid associating with girls. They are your helpers, confidants, and shoulders to cry on. They lend you things, give you advice, and help you make money. Sure, you shouldn't get caught up in paying so much attention to drama or horsing around that you're losing out on $$. But you DO need a few girls who have your back, or else you'll be lonely and you'll become a target because girls will think you're a snotty bitch. Give yourself time to talk to girls. Friendships form naturally. Just be smart about the levels of the friendship... don't become BFF's overnight. You still have to exercise judgement, as you would outside the club. Being unhappy and a loner, though, is NOT going to result in you being more financially successful. That's a fact.
    Quote Originally Posted by xxxtc View Post
    MEN - poorly designed creatures

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    Smiley Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by BabeeC View Post
    Italian Bombshell... Thanks so much! Those are just the exact words I needed to hear! It feels amazing to know that somebody actually understands and gets where I'm coming from! I can't thank you enough!!
    I'm feeling totally confident now and ready to ROCK tomorrow... but that could all change like 2 hours before my shift..

    But Tempest is right.. I need to grow some brass ones. I can't be the little shy girl afraid of the big bad scary custy. In all honesty at first your words seemed super harsh and I was lie "WTF".. but now I really need to thank you! Totally the push I needed.

    And Camille. Great advice!

    I totally love this site.

    Thanks guys!!
    You're welcome Babee. I just feel where you are coming from...but you just have to remember that you ARE ambitious, courageous, and beautiful, pole tricks or not. I would suggest reading the uplifting posts from everyone on this thread when you start having hesitations before you go in...

    ALSO:
    You have to also remember to not get caught up in drama but DO be friendly and civil to the girls. Like Bunni says, you can't be totally isolated from the girls or else the other dancers will pick on you and start to be extra bitchy and make snide comments about how you think you're better than the other girls. Be nice, smile, be friendly even when girls pick on you and make comments. Girls are going to be girls and some will try to bully you and make you feel like you shouldn't be there. I was bullied by a couple girls that ended up getting in good with me and helping me out with finding cash cows for the night...just because I didn't fight back or cower down. I stood my ground but remained sweet and kind. It was because I was nice no matter what. We had laughs and good times chatting. They even helped me with stage shows and pole tricks! You always need to be nice. Not syrupey sweet, but nice enough to show you acknowledge them. Some girls are toxic, so just choose your acquaintances and potential buddies wisely. I had two girls that I trusted with very private info and in return she trusted me with info that could ruin her chances of ever dancing at the club we worked at together. Keep your mouth shut when they tell you things, even if it's about another dancer. Just be like, "oh, ok. interesting." or "okay. well...*shrug and smile* oh well..". Just keep it short and neutral. They might be baiting you to take back comments from you about what they're telling you about that girl back to the girl the "friend" of yours is bashing. Do not get involved in that. Cat fights and broken noses can sometimes result in that. You don't want to lose your job over shit talkers. I never had an issue with it because when girls were sitting in the DR talking shit, I was reapplying my lipstick, adjusting my thigh highs & garters, and SILENTLY hovering over my money with my back turned to them, counting it...NOT flashing it. Flashing it and showing you counting your money will earn you enemies. Be discreet. Just tune it out and stay silent, and if they all gang up on you or single you out and ask you your opinion, just be neutral and nice, just do what I did, "this doesn't really matter to me. I don't care if she *insert topic of bashing here*. that's her business, not mine....so I guess you could say I have nothing to say about her or her situation.". From that point on they would never ask my opinion because they knew I wouldn't talk shit. I also gained friendship and allies when other girls did pick on me because of this. Having a few girls to have your back and one or two to trust is important! Don't isolate yourself!!

    ALSO ALSO: (lol)
    Don't worry Babee, this industry isn't for everyone! Some girls think that stripping will "cure" their naturally shy nature. This line of work is not for the shy. What I don't understand is the fact that you could meet total strangers and have sex with them for money, yet you cannot go to a club, (that is NOT new to you since you've previously worked there), and dance. I don't understand where this fear of the customer is coming from. Is it the fact that you are, as we all now know, "shy" and, from what I am reading in your posts, have a bit of self worth, courage, and self esteem issues to the point where it makes you scared to approach men? Is it the approaching customers thing that trips you out? I am needing clarification. I found escorting helped me, not hindered me, in learning how to deal with customers and whatever they might throw at me, metaphorically speaking of course, and aid in having the courage to approach total strangers and try to sell them a product - myself...or in your case YOURSELF. Look, here is something my dad taught me about sales: you have to believe in, be confident about, and be passionate about the product/thing you are selling. I work at a sandwich shop part time and we have this new cookie, the Chocolate Cherry Granola cookie. I walk around with a tray with samples and give out samples while telling them the key ingredients of the cookie with a smile, and confident, cheery attitude. I can self all 20-30 (depending on how many we made that day) of the 2 packs in 90 minutes. It is because I approach EVERY SINGLE CUSTOMER at the register when I am ringing up their sandwich and am passionate about selling the product. I am always confident and happy...as if I love that cookie to death, when in fact, I hate the cookie because it is too sweet for me! You have to fake it but not show that you don't like it. You have to put 150% into what you are selling. If you stop trying, then you don't sell the proverbial cookie. BE PASSIONATE ABOUT THE DAMN COOKIE!! LOL! Just think of stripping as you are me, selling something as simple as a cookie, and you express your love, confidence, and passion for the "cookie" (dance) to the point where you are more than sure he'll love it. haha! IT DOES WORK! I PROMISE! The key thing though is to have confidence and passion! You MUST have these! You have to believe in yourself enough to be able to believe you will give every customer you approach the best dance they'll ever get and put all your energy into each "sales pitch" and even stage show. You don't want to just slowly, absent mindedly walk around the stage....BE PASSIONATE ABOUT THE COOKIE!! Do not forget to be CONFIDENT in the cookie too! LOVE THE COOKIE!!

    (cookie = dance or stage show)

    you can do this!!
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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    If escorting is making you happy stick with it. Nobody is going to hold it against you if you choose the private sector over the club. Hell if I didn't have a boyfriend I might do the private sector, but I'd be a broke ass bitch because of how picky I'd be with clients.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    @ babee, you can totally make friends in the club. being able to get along with coworkers is like...one of the main ways you enjoy work. look at all the threads here about women who are miserable at their clubs because they hate everyone they work with. you SHOULD get along with the women you work with. make friends (it makes hustling easier). i seriously cannot make money in a club where i am not comfortable around the other dancers. i am getting naked in front of you, for fuck's sake. we ought to be on good terms!

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by BunniHops View Post
    Just don't dance. You're inflicting mental torture on yourself by doing things you don't want to do. Because deep in there, if you really enjoyed it, you'd be pumped to go in, even if you were nervous. You'd be pumped to make the money and try new things..... I hope I'm not crucified for this statement. But to me it just seems like you're not fit for it & you sincerely are not ready or willing. Don't do it to yourself..... Whenever I go in and I just don't feel like it at all, I feel like shit the whole night and don't make money... Try something else. I'm going to start bartending soon because I'm fed up with dancing. I felt that regretful feeling in the pit of my stomach too many times. So now I am transitioning gradually away from it until it's a thing of the past.
    There's a lot more to me not wanting to dance than just "I don't want to do it."... But the transition is hard. I'm used to just being gone for 2 hours, and coming home with money for the week.
    And it's also just getting out of my slump and going to work.
    But by saying "Just don't dance" as your first sentence... makes me want to prove to myself that I got this. I may be down right now, but I got this.
    && if I don't like it, at least I can say I tried and I didn't just give up before even starting

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by Brandi_Lynn View Post
    If you are having this much of a negative reaction to it, then i cannot imagine this industry being for you. Hell, it might only be more harmful than helpful to you in the long run if it is causing you this much stress & anxiety before you can even jump in. Having an outgoing personality is one of the main staples in this industry otherwise your severely handicapped.

    It seems that you might need a more experienced stripper to take you under her wing to help & encourage you alittle, unfortunately your not gonna be able to find that if you don't at least get your butt in the club. Especially, considering that most dancers tend not to pay attention or are standoffish of new girls for awhile.

    Your just gonna have to change this. "Be the change you wish to seek" -Ghandi
    Thanks Brandi... I'm definitely making the change! I will be on the lookout for a dancer that seems nice enough to help me... But I can't just ask her.. Can I?

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by Italian_Bombshell849 View Post
    You're welcome Babee. I just feel where you are coming from...but you just have to remember that you ARE ambitious, courageous, and beautiful, pole tricks or not. I would suggest reading the uplifting posts from everyone on this thread when you start having hesitations before you go in...

    ALSO:
    You have to also remember to not get caught up in drama but DO be friendly and civil to the girls. Like Bunni says, you can't be totally isolated from the girls or else the other dancers will pick on you and start to be extra bitchy and make snide comments about how you think you're better than the other girls. Be nice, smile, be friendly even when girls pick on you and make comments. Girls are going to be girls and some will try to bully you and make you feel like you shouldn't be there. I was bullied by a couple girls that ended up getting in good with me and helping me out with finding cash cows for the night...just because I didn't fight back or cower down. I stood my ground but remained sweet and kind. It was because I was nice no matter what. We had laughs and good times chatting. They even helped me with stage shows and pole tricks! You always need to be nice. Not syrupey sweet, but nice enough to show you acknowledge them. Some girls are toxic, so just choose your acquaintances and potential buddies wisely. I had two girls that I trusted with very private info and in return she trusted me with info that could ruin her chances of ever dancing at the club we worked at together. Keep your mouth shut when they tell you things, even if it's about another dancer. Just be like, "oh, ok. interesting." or "okay. well...*shrug and smile* oh well..". Just keep it short and neutral. They might be baiting you to take back comments from you about what they're telling you about that girl back to the girl the "friend" of yours is bashing. Do not get involved in that. Cat fights and broken noses can sometimes result in that. You don't want to lose your job over shit talkers. I never had an issue with it because when girls were sitting in the DR talking shit, I was reapplying my lipstick, adjusting my thigh highs & garters, and SILENTLY hovering over my money with my back turned to them, counting it...NOT flashing it. Flashing it and showing you counting your money will earn you enemies. Be discreet. Just tune it out and stay silent, and if they all gang up on you or single you out and ask you your opinion, just be neutral and nice, just do what I did, "this doesn't really matter to me. I don't care if she *insert topic of bashing here*. that's her business, not mine....so I guess you could say I have nothing to say about her or her situation.". From that point on they would never ask my opinion because they knew I wouldn't talk shit. I also gained friendship and allies when other girls did pick on me because of this. Having a few girls to have your back and one or two to trust is important! Don't isolate yourself!!

    ALSO ALSO: (lol)
    Don't worry Babee, this industry isn't for everyone! Some girls think that stripping will "cure" their naturally shy nature. This line of work is not for the shy. What I don't understand is the fact that you could meet total strangers and have sex with them for money, yet you cannot go to a club, (that is NOT new to you since you've previously worked there), and dance. I don't understand where this fear of the customer is coming from. Is it the fact that you are, as we all now know, "shy" and, from what I am reading in your posts, have a bit of self worth, courage, and self esteem issues to the point where it makes you scared to approach men? Is it the approaching customers thing that trips you out? I am needing clarification. I found escorting helped me, not hindered me, in learning how to deal with customers and whatever they might throw at me, metaphorically speaking of course, and aid in having the courage to approach total strangers and try to sell them a product - myself...or in your case YOURSELF. Look, here is something my dad taught me about sales: you have to believe in, be confident about, and be passionate about the product/thing you are selling. I work at a sandwich shop part time and we have this new cookie, the Chocolate Cherry Granola cookie. I walk around with a tray with samples and give out samples while telling them the key ingredients of the cookie with a smile, and confident, cheery attitude. I can self all 20-30 (depending on how many we made that day) of the 2 packs in 90 minutes. It is because I approach EVERY SINGLE CUSTOMER at the register when I am ringing up their sandwich and am passionate about selling the product. I am always confident and happy...as if I love that cookie to death, when in fact, I hate the cookie because it is too sweet for me! You have to fake it but not show that you don't like it. You have to put 150% into what you are selling. If you stop trying, then you don't sell the proverbial cookie. BE PASSIONATE ABOUT THE DAMN COOKIE!! LOL! Just think of stripping as you are me, selling something as simple as a cookie, and you express your love, confidence, and passion for the "cookie" (dance) to the point where you are more than sure he'll love it. haha! IT DOES WORK! I PROMISE! The key thing though is to have confidence and passion! You MUST have these! You have to believe in yourself enough to be able to believe you will give every customer you approach the best dance they'll ever get and put all your energy into each "sales pitch" and even stage show. You don't want to just slowly, absent mindedly walk around the stage....BE PASSIONATE ABOUT THE COOKIE!! Do not forget to be CONFIDENT in the cookie too! LOVE THE COOKIE!!

    (cookie = dance or stage show)

    you can do this!!

    OHH EMM GEE!! I don't even know what to say to all of this except THANK YOU!! You totally get where I'm coming from!! && no joke, I'm about to print out your lil speech about the cookie and put it in my car for on the way to work today!! Totally amazing!!

    && yes my BIGGEST issue, is approaching the customer. Not really sure why.. I think I just need to work kon my sales pitch and totally flirtacious side a bit more...

    My stage name is a name I took from this girl I went to high school with. EVERYBODY knew her. She was captain of the dance team and choreographed everything from dance to cheer leading. She has such a seductive look and just doesn't give a fuck. BUT she's only like 4'8 and 160 lbs. If she didn't carry herself so well and have such charismatic ability, she would NOT be popular... Soooo.... I aspire to be like her. When I hear people at the club call me *----*, I'm like oh! I can be her for a night

    Well that's my new outlook on this

    Thanks Italian Bombshell!

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    If escorting is making you happy stick with it. Nobody is going to hold it against you if you choose the private sector over the club. Hell if I didn't have a boyfriend I might do the private sector, but I'd be a broke ass bitch because of how picky I'd be with clients.
    Escorting isn't making me happy at all. I'm thanking the man upstairs everyday for giving me another day. It just wasn't worth the risk. I have a family and all that could be erased in one prostitution bust. No thanks.

    So I'm taking your advice and growing some brass ones.

    I got this.

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    @ babee, you can totally make friends in the club. being able to get along with coworkers is like...one of the main ways you enjoy work. look at all the threads here about women who are miserable at their clubs because they hate everyone they work with. you SHOULD get along with the women you work with. make friends (it makes hustling easier). i seriously cannot make money in a club where i am not comfortable around the other dancers. i am getting naked in front of you, for fuck's sake. we ought to be on good terms!
    VERY TRUE!!
    I should of seen it this way from the beginning. But the one friend I did have at the club, really distracted me. When I didn't feel like dancing, instead of taking a mini break and touching up my makeup, I would spend 45 min- an hour in the back just talking to her.
    NOT good!

    But I'm changing that

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    Veteran Member kellyallstar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by coquette View Post
    It takes balls (what Tempest said), confidence, and WORK to be a stripper. If you don't WORK you won't make money. I work my ass off EVERY NIGHT, and trust me honey it's not my pole tricks selling dances it's my hustle. Some of the highest earning girls in my club don't even go on stage. You have to study selling tips and advice and USE THEM at work. You won't make it unless you are dedicated to working for it.
    Totally agree, I used to come off stage and girls would come up to me and say you're such a good dancer, I don't know why guys aren't lined up for dances...For me I'm more of a hustler on the floor, I really didn't like the stage at all, pretty much ignored all the guys and did what I wanted, great work out! But it took a while for me to find out why i was there, what was I suppose to do and who the hell was I suppose to be.

    There are girls who can work that stage just by walking around and looking into guys eyes and smiling who make damn bank. Thats just confidence.

    Also about escorting my bestfriend got into it after dancing for like maybe 12 years, and she was totally happy, and told me it was so easy and didn't know why she didn't do that first. I guess it's the one on one instead of getting naked in front of a crowd. However now shes back dancing...

    Maybe do day shift or something? less aggressive nights maybe? And you know what best advice I EVER got was you're there to make money NOT make friends, if you make a friend it's a bonus. And hell yeah 13 years later i STILL have some of them as friends. Just stick to yourself, watch,listen and learn how others do things..and the longer you stick it out I'm positive other dancers will be sweet as to you.
    I'm here to make money. NOT make friends, if I make a friend then it's a bonus.

    I'd rather be absolutely ridiculous that absolutely boring

    Quote Originally Posted by mediocrity View Post
    I don't hate men. I hate everyone equally.
    Quote Originally Posted by CandySeattle
    Kelly you're so raunchy, but in a proper way.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dude, it's not her "world" it's her job. It's not some sort of Pavlovian trance that dancers go into when they smell money, it's simply how they make a living.

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    Default Re: Words of Encouragement? Ever felt like this?

    Quote Originally Posted by BabeeC View Post
    Thanks Brandi... I'm definitely making the change! I will be on the lookout for a dancer that seems nice enough to help me... But I can't just ask her.. Can I?
    No problem. No, not really, making friends in a club is just like making friends in real life. Be friendly w/ everyone, but don't try to hard -other girls (whether they be new like you or old) will start talking to you & what not when they feel comfortable. Just be sure to stay away from the trouble makers. Good luck.
    "You're better than no one and no one is better than you."
    -- Bob Dylan

    “There's never going to be a great misunderstanding of me. I think I'm a little whacked.”


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