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Thread: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

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    Angry How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    I work in a bklyn club. The chics are ghetto. They all are always striving to shoe who's the "baddest" of them all. I sooo don't fit in. I keep to myself and have like 1 real aquaintance who I talk to. I'm very professional and pleasant. So no drama basically. However I'm noticing certain people trying to mess with me. The bouncer was a DOUCHE the other night and I never even spoke to him before! I asked him a polite question and he was rude and then later in the night he told me off out of nowhere when i was in the car with his other bouncer buddy who was giving me a ride. I didn't know the way to the train and I thought the guy knew so it was simply a misunderstanding. He was like "omg. WTF? Blah blah blah u don't know where the fuck u are going?! Omg!" and the stupidest part was it was NOT his car!!

    And I was like soooo exhausted and shocked I was like "why are u talking to me like that?" and he just was being soooo mean and without merit. I hate confrontation as I am someone who explodes. So I stayed calm and ignored him while telling the driver to let me out. After getting home I was fuming!! I thought of a good way to tell him off after I slept and had a brain to think with. By that time it was too late Of course. So now he thinks im a doormat i bet!
    Now I'm dying to tell him off when i see him but yet I don't want to be branded as yet
    another ghetto chic AND yet I know I need to say SOMETHING or I will look like a doormat since I didn't lay into him like he deserved. How do I balance standing up for
    myself VS ending up fired or worse in jail from arguing/fighting with future idiots? In
    this urban club I can tell if I don't yell a little from time to time going to be trampled. AOk thx. And no the manager doesn't care. ANY strategies for dealing with a-holes who are loud ghetto and mean???? I can't afford to go to jail so don't say "if I were u I would knock them out if i were u blah blah blah"

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    God/dess 4everresolutions's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    Don't tell anyone off. Bad idea. Keep to yourself. You don't need to be anyones door mat, but you don't need to scream and cause a scene either. REally. Keep. To. Yourself. Take you own cab from now on. Don't speak to the rude bouncer again. Eventually the other girls will ignore you. Listen to your iPod while you put on your makeup. If someone talks behind your back, then just ignore it. Do you.

    Try to find a new place to work.



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    Featured Member Spinnerette's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    Yep. What 4everresolutions said. Believe me when I say I KNOW it sucks ass to bite your tongue when you want to lay into someone and let them know you're not one to test. But it's not about what they think and it never will be. Ignore the rude and confrontational people. Let them make fools of themselves because you're there to work and not make friends. Putting yourself above the drama is always the best route against those looking to get a rise out of you. It frustrates them (winning) and keeps your hands clean.

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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    Just ignore it all and let it go. The bouncer is a douche and you yelling at him isn't going to change that - if anything, it'll make him even more of a douche toward you. Don't talk to him or get rides from him anymore. Ignore the stupid girls. Don't talk to anyone, make sure your shit is locked up tightly, and avoid the DR as much as you can during the night. Reacting and "being ghetto" will only cause more drama - not solve it. Once you are a "ghetto chick" like them, you will be getting sucked into the drama and arguments all the time because they'll think you're a bitch, and you'll feel obligated to stand up for yourself over and over again. At my first club, the bitchiest girl there was always in fights. Her "standing up for herself and not taking shit" didn't translate into her being left alone. It made other people even bitchier toward her and it caused her to go off about things that didn't matter because she "didn't want to be a doormat." Don't go there. There's only so much they can feed off of if you ignore them and just do your business.

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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    I would've told the bouncer off, starting off with exactly what you said "why are you talking to me like that"? "obviously I don't know my fucking way around, why the fuck should I be talked to like a piece of shit, talk a damn chill pill you are a kill joy". Then ignore him and everyone else. You DON'T have to "knock" anyone around, but you can't let people talk to you like that esp in a working environment. You don't have to act "ghetto" stand your ground at least once, so they know you are not someone they can pick on....it's been a long time since middle school drama right?
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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    i dunno. it sounds like you hate your coworkers and so they are hating you right back, which makes a lot of sense.

    i have trouble believing that you are being kind and pleasant to everyone and they are going out of their way to ruin your night. sometimes, it is easier to blame other people, but since all we can control our ourselves, then keep staying focused on being polite and amiable, stop judging your coworkers for what they're "striving" to be, stop focusing on how "ghetto" they are, and work. or switch clubs.

    good luck

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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    Pay no mind to them. If they are trashy and rude then they are obviously caught up in their own semantics. I laugh at ghetto people, they are so lost it's hilarious to me.
    If you are willing to do for one year what other's won't, you can spend a lifetime doing what other's cant.


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    Default Re: How to deal with MEAN and GHETTO co-workers?

    I would try to switch clubs - find one that suits you better.

    In the meantime, just keep yourself to yourself.

    If you really want to have a talk with the bouncer, then I would do so very carefully, very politely, and very calmly. Find a time when he is not busy, (even ask if he has a minute) and just say something like "I wanted to talk to you about the other night - It was just a misunderstanding - I would really like to have a good working relationship with you and didn't want you to think that I am looking to cause drama." Something to smooth it over. But honestly, I wouldn't bother.
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