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Thread: To offend, or not to?

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by Davey17 View Post
    The point is SIMPLE , in either scenario no matter how you dress it up , Its payment for a service for which the customer will decide on the appropriate sub contractor for him / her .
    You have a real gift for stating the obvious.

    My issue with your goofy posts has not been with the premise that he has the right to choose, which is clearly obvious to everyone, but rather with this:

    Quote Originally Posted by Davey17 View Post
    She's is doing poor work if he is not satisfied with what he recieves...
    She was not doing poor work per se, but rather he just wants something not offered by her. Simple.

    One size does not fit all in a SC. For some guys she may be the perfect dancer, while for others she might not be what they are looking for. Again, each girl brings uniquely individualized pros and cons to the table.

    So to continue with the fruit analogy, if he wants an apple, he should just go to the apple cart instead of whining about the fact that the peach vendor is only selling peaches.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 07-25-2011 at 08:00 AM.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    I'd get pretty offended if you asked me that and didn't have a big apology tip on hand to compensate for your incompetence (because no means no so why are you questioning her boundaries in the first place?)... So maybe try that..start by saying, "If what I'm about to ask offends you in any way take this portrait of benjamin franklin as an apology.....May I grab your tits? No? Okay here you go, my sincerest apologies, lets continue as we were." ta daa

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    She would initiate further contact if she wanted to. If you asked her she may or may not be offended but she will look at you in a different light. Chances are this girl has no interest in changing her rules or dealing with customers who want to push them. Dancers are accustomed to regulars coming and going so she will probably just assume you're getting bored and move on. Just squeeze some willing dancers boobs.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan
    So to continue with the fruit analogy, if he wants an apple, he should just go to the apple cart instead of whining about the fact that the peach vendor is only selling peaches.
    Perfect.

    OP - if you enjoy your time with her, that's what matters. As stated by others here, if you continue to spend on her, either the contact level will increase or it won't. I have had many regular ladies over the years. As they became more comfortable with me sometimes THEY upped the contact level (never at my behest or request); other times they didn't.

    The bottom line is - spend your money on the girls you like. To take a stab at Davey's ridiculous analogy - if you REALLY REALLY like your electrician, that doesn't mean you'll convince him to fix the transmission in your truck, lol.

    The OP likes this girl and what she does for him, but wants more contact. She doesn't do contact. Either he enjoys what she DOES offer, or he finds a girl that he likes just as much that also allows that kind of touching (and deals with the possibility of consequences of such illegal contact, however minute the possibility of it becoming an issue may be).

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by 4everresolutions View Post
    I dunno, I think I'm with Davey on this one.

    We ARE a lot like plumbers. IC's, responsible for keeping out customers happy, etc.



    Can you see the similarities now? Just like plumbers.

    Free market, supply and demand, yada yada.

    ha ha ha ha ha ha ............ Yes she meets the Criteria ..an alround handy girl !
    Enjoy ... and Progress , Its all in the name of personal enjoyment

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Yes okey ..Enough with the Analagy .. and Fruit ..and services .

    Point taken ....But really we agree . I wasn't talking about breaking rules or VIPs , or etc etc .

    Agreed , he should choose for himself ..which is what I was saying .

    But just one question ??????????????

    Can this Trades girl above Sign off on some electrical work ?? Just some downlights and externals !

    Thanks All .
    Enjoy ... and Progress , Its all in the name of personal enjoyment

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    ^Contact Jay12



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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    She's set her boudaries. If that was going to change she wouldn't have told you SPECIFICALLY where you could and couldn't put your hands. This is the problem that has come up for a lot of us who are clean dancers. Other dancers are forcing us to either do something we don't want to do (we're there to entertain you nothing more) or make less money. If that's what you're looking for, go to another girl. She's not, nor should you ask her, to do anything different. Sounds like she's doing her job perfectly well as it is.
    I agree with this. Pushing her boundaries with ultimatums, no matter how subtle, is just wrong.

    Don't get me wrong - I LOVE high-contact, but even I wouldn't be able to sleep at night knowing I had pushed a dancer beyond her boundaries. That would just make me sick to my stomach.

    There are plenty of dancers around who will give you high contact.

    You can have a pleasant conversation and warm-up with a few dances from this clean dancer and then end your night with high contact dances from another dancer.
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    If you pressured a dancer into doing things she is not comfortable doing she may not be able to sleep at night. She may even resent you secretly. Happened to me once, and I still hate this guy's guts.

    How about you get a gf ? They are free and all the contact AND XXX you want!

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    You can have a pleasant conversation and warm-up with a few dances from thisclean dancer and then end your night with high contact dances from another dancer.
    This makes me sad. The industry is really just ruined.
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    femmefatale88 said GF's are free, LMAO...

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    This makes me sad. The industry is really just ruined.
    If by ruined you mean low-contact dancers are becoming obsolete, you are probably right. In Houston, I don't think I have EVER met a low-contact dancer. (I did come across ONE in Dallas, but NONE here in Houston.)

    I usually keep my hands on her legs (knee area), until SHE places them on her breasts or ass and instructs me not to be shy. But, I'd be lying if I said my submission to her orders was carried out with reluctance or resentment.
    Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    If you like this chick and want to keep spending quality time with her, don't ask. Like many before have said, she has set her boundries with you, which I"m sure are the same boundries as she sets for her other customers. If you want to get more out of a dance, find another girl. Some entertainers are more comfortable with certain types of contact than others. Which is worth more to you, class or ass? Me, it depends on my mood. Sometimes I want a good girl and sometimes I want a dirty whore.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    If by ruined you mean low-contact dancers are becoming obsolete, you are probably right.
    You do understand that it used to be all air dances all the time and that was the only type of dance you could get right? That's what I mean by ruined.
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    This makes me sad. The industry is really just ruined.
    It certainly seems to have become a step on the road to prostitution. Now, before people get up in arms about that comment, I realize it begins and ends with dances only for the majority of girls, but it is the business of selling sexual fantasies to men and as the contact in the club increases, the industry just moves further down that road.
    .
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Jack and bem, let's also look at where you two are posting from: Houston and Providence. These are widely known to be two of the dirties SC cities in the country, along with Miami and Detroit.

    There are plenty of places where strip club services have not devolved to these levels. And, IMHO, the smart dancers know where to go to avoid the worst of this stuff while still making money.

    And even in the so-called dirty places, these things tend to be cyclical. Who knows what will happen with the next generation of dancers and law enforcement activities? Some places get cleaner while others get dirtier. For example, Boston was once off the hook and now its strip clubs are extremely tame. Also, p4p issues hovering around strip clubs are nothing remotely new. Now granted they have become a bit more blatant since times have become tougher, but they have always been there to some degree.

    I realize that things are a bit tougher now, but let's not go off the cliff with this. There are still plenty of girls making good livings relatively cleanly and I don't see that changing dramatically anytime soon.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 07-27-2011 at 05:47 PM.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    Jack and bem, before this gets overly melodramatic let's look at where you two are posting from: Houston and Providence. These are widely known to be two of the dirties SC cities in the country, along with Miami and Detroit.

    I realize that things are a bit tougher now, but let's not go off the cliff with this. There are still plenty of girls making good livings relatively cleanly and I don't see that changing dramatically anytime soon.
    My experience is essentially strictly based on RI, but more importantly, on what my friends there have said about the clubs. To be honest, in the years I did dances, I only remember a couple of them that included anything considered an "extra" by RI standards. The number one complaint that these girls had mirrored that of JayTee that the whole nature of the business was changing. Hell, they even referred to club as a whorehouse once they were done and this was at one of the tamest clubs in town. It had become very hard, though not impossible, to keep it clean and continue to bank unless you were able to reel in some regulars willing to spend and accept stated boundaries.
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    It certainly seems to have become a step on the road to prostitution. Now, before people get up in arms about that comment, I realize it begins and ends with dances only for the majority of girls, but it is the business of selling sexual fantasies to men and as the contact in the club increases, the industry just moves further down that road.
    .
    Key word being fantasy.

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    Jack and bem, let's also look at where you two are posting from: Houston and Providence. These are widely known to be two of the dirties SC cities in the country, along with Miami and Detroit.

    There are plenty of places where strip club services have not devolved to these levels. And, IMHO, the smart dancers know where to go to avoid the worst of this stuff while still making money.

    And even in the so-called dirty places, these things tend to be cyclical. Who knows what will happen with the next generation of dancers and law enforcement activities? Some places get cleaner while others get dirtier. For example, Boston was once off the hook and now its strip clubs are extremely tame. Also, p4p issues hovering around strip clubs are nothing remotely new. Now granted they have become a bit more blatant since times have become tougher, but they have always been there to some degree.

    I realize that things are a bit tougher now, but let's not go off the cliff with this. There are still plenty of girls making good livings relatively cleanly and I don't see that changing dramatically anytime soon.
    This is true and does make me feel a bit better about returning in a few months.
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    You know the part that absolutely kills me and cracks me up simultaneously? The guys being like OH, GRABBING HER FEELS SO GOOD, FEELS GREAT!! etc etc. Because no matter how you slice it, it does NOT feel good to the girl. The closest thing to "good" it feels to them is "tolerable", and that's still a hell of a stretch.

    Keep in mind when you ask for more "mileage" that these are human girls, not sexual favour dispensers.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    For example, Boston was once off the hook and now its strip clubs are extremely tame.
    LMAO! I've been going to Boston strip clubs for almost 30 years. They have NEVER been off the hook as far as what goes on inside. Even when the Combat Zone was in full swing there was no such thing as a private lap dance! There may have been a ton of clubs but there was universally no contact other than a few girls doing a little stick-shifting at the infamous Glass Slipper.. Guys paid for watered-down dancer drinks just to have a girl sit with them and tease them. While it's true that some dancers (read hookers) would turn tricks outside the club there was not much of anything to be had inside.
    Last edited by yoda57us; 07-28-2011 at 01:35 AM.
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by kooter View Post
    Great forum, lots of valuable info - thanks for the time.
    Hello and welcome to the wonderful world of strip club junkieness. With all due respect to the pinkies and their helpful advice, my advice to you is to not let your strip clubbing decisions and level of enjoyment be guided by anything you read here. You can make your own decisions, based on your own observations and experiences, even as a SC newbie. IMHO you are too worried about offending your favorite dancer. If her touching boundaries are indeed way more strict than most other dancers in the same club, she has likely seen customers and their money migrate from her to other more liberal dancers. If that works for her, and you keep spending on her, good for her. If you start spending more on others, trust me, she will notice and either start to change the rules, or let you and your money move on. Either way, it's your decision how you spend your hard earned dollars.

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Hai, thx 4 teh sig, K?


    Quote Originally Posted by mediocrity View Post
    You know the part that absolutely kills me and cracks me up simultaneously? The guys being like OH, GRABBING HER FEELS SO GOOD, FEELS GREAT!! etc etc. Because no matter how you slice it, it does NOT feel good to the girl. The closest thing to "good" it feels to them is "tolerable", and that's still a hell of a stretch.

    Keep in mind when you ask for more "mileage" that these are human girls, not sexual favour dispensers.



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  28. #48
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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    LMAO! I've been going to Boston strip clubs for almost 30 years. They have NEVER been off the hook as far as what goes on inside. Even when the Combat Zone was in full swing there was no such thing as a private lap dance! There may have been a ton of clubs but there was universally no contact other than a few girls doing a little stick-shifting at the infamous Glass Slipper.. Guys paid for watered-down dancer drinks just to have a girl sit with them and tease them. While it's true that some dancers (read hookers) would turn tricks outside the club there was not much of anything to be had inside.
    LOL yoda. I agree that not much was going on ITC, but you and I both know that a couple of those places were thinly disguised hooker hangouts, with girls leaving with customers and coming back later to "dance." Hell, some guys working in the financial district and on Beacon Hill would take extended lunches to go down there and do some more business. And if you are ok with calling what used to happen with the daytime girls at Ye Ol' Slipper "stick shifting" then I'm on board, though the definition that I always understood never required extra napkins.

    Now I'll agree that I might have gone a little dramatic in making the point, but I think that we would both agree that things are far cleaner today than they were back then.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 07-28-2011 at 05:41 AM.

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    Crossfingers Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    You do understand that it used to be all air dances all the time and that was the only type of dance you could get right? That's what I mean by ruined.

    I dont quite understand all your Rules and Options over there ..We dont have the likes of the VIP room ( or not the way I understand the VIP room ) ....

    But yes , the low contact dance didn't exist at all here in the beginning ..then it came and went ..Legislation is an absolute joke , and if enforced would kill the industry here because no one would purchase the product , they have tried very hard to kill it .

    Pushing up ( Incredibly ) the cost of licensing a venue , thus drastically incresing the price of a drink , also the Cover charge for the punter , the cost of a shift for the dancer ....while the end product is " Supposed " to be a prance around without a decent grind and participation ..Wouldn't be anyone of earth willing to pay for that ..Thus meaning the demise of the venue , starting with the weakest , and progressing accross all .

    Few votes in an Exoctic Lap dance club unfortunately ...

    These are the problems we potentially face here ...plus the more expensive the entry and drinks ..the less that gets spent on the end product . Remembering the population of our entire country is basically the population of one decent size State in the US .
    Enjoy ... and Progress , Its all in the name of personal enjoyment

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    Default Re: To offend, or not to?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    You do understand that it used to be all air dances all the time and that was the only type of dance you could get right? That's what I mean by ruined.
    I've never been to a SC in NY, even though I lived there until I was 21.

    My first SC was in Dallas, probably around 2000. All the SCs I've been to (Dallas, Houston and surrounding cities) have been high-contact.
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