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Thread: I Dont Approah Everyone

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    Default I Dont Approah Everyone

    Funiture/barflys excluded I do not approach everyone and I'm losing money to an unattractive out of shape female because of it, youd think that would be motivation enough but its not. How can I force myself to approach men like I'm supposed to be doing? I hate appearing like I'm not trying when there isn't anyone in the club I know. Anyone else having this issue or had this issue?
    The worst they can say is no.

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    Member La Maddalena's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    I sometimes have this problem. Every shift I try to approach one more person than the last shift. Being new to this I'm taking baby steps. I know this is not the most profitable route, but I want to be natural and confident when I approach clients.

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    Veteran Member obscurity's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    yeah, i didn't hustle the floor......i did my hustle on stage...gave a really good performance, eye contact, and always, every set.....the men that tipped me on stage asked for dances while tipping me. it's less pressure that way. i can't and will not sound like a boring broken record...and thats what it would be if i tried....lol. this is def the job where first impressions matter, better to be cool and confident like you said ))
    June Cleaver stripper

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    Veteran Member pipermonroe's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Tony Robbins said something that has stuck with me. It's regarding his start, back when he was still working for a company and had yet to start his own. I will paraphrase:

    "I wasn't better at giving speeches than anyone else at my company. But while they were booking themselves for two speeches a week, I was booking myself for two speeches a day. If you want to get great at something you have to do it... A LOT."


    Talk to everyone. Think of it as practice for becoming great. What else are you going to do with your time at work? I'm very shy naturally. I don't want to approach people. I don't want to be turned down. But I want money so it gets done. I hope this helps.


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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    the best way to do it is just DO IT! once you get into the habit it'll become easy.

    sometimes I walk up to guys and they're like "I was waiting for you to come over here!"

    sometimes men approach you, but if you wanna make money 9 times out of 10 you gotta go and get it!!!

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    Veteran Member _natasha's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Quote Originally Posted by pipermonroe View Post

    "I wasn't better at giving speeches than anyone else at my company. But while they were booking themselves for two speeches a week, I was booking myself for two speeches a day. If you want to get great at something you have to do it... A LOT."

    I LOVE this quote!! Thank you. I was like you OP and noticed my money dwindling. Call it burnout, boredom, whatever.

    I just grew some balls and decided to speak to everyone. My money is back up (thank god). It's worth just going out there and doing it. I think I read/heard on dancerwealth it's a probability game - for everyone that says no, someone will say yes.

    I recommend dancerwealth for 'how to' approach and for confidence to approach. It is such a numbers game.

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    Senior Member MiaStarr's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Quote Originally Posted by pipermonroe View Post
    Talk to everyone. Think of it as practice for becoming great. What else are you going to do with your time at work?
    100% agree. I know I look like a real newb on stage, hustling and LD's but I also know that every girl in there was a newbie once and were awkward too and that someday I'll be just good as they are so I just do the best with what I've got, and I do it with confidence! It's works for me and I don't get deterred because of one or two rejections. Practice makes perfect, and that's the truth.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Create "rules" for yourself...
    Every 2 songs that go by I will approach someone else for a dance.
    Every time I get off stage I will ask everyone who tipped me for a dance.
    If I spot someone looking at me I will go over and ask for a dance.

    Even just little things like... asking a guy every other set that passes will drastically increase the number of people you talk to in a night.
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Quote Originally Posted by _natasha View Post
    I LOVE this quote!! Thank you. I was like you OP and noticed my money dwindling. Call it burnout, boredom, whatever.

    I just grew some balls and decided to speak to everyone. My money is back up (thank god). It's worth just going out there and doing it. I think I read/heard on dancerwealth it's a probability game - for everyone that says no, someone will say yes.

    I recommend dancerwealth for 'how to' approach and for confidence to approach. It is such a numbers game.
    for me it starts out as a numbers game but once I start getting dances my mood improves and it gets easier.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Quote Originally Posted by xGigi View Post
    for me it starts out as a numbers game but once I start getting dances my mood improves and it gets easier.
    Totally. Once I have a few dances under my belt my confidence and mood is up and I'm 'on a roll'. Plus, looking like you're popular always helps. Coming out of VIP after an hour and being 'the new girl' on the floor again to new customers always helps.

    But to start, you gotta approach people and find the ones that say yes to put you in that mood.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    In PA you generally have to approach everyone because after your set you do what's called the "tip walk" or "Dollar parade". I dunno I ask generous tippers if they wanna see my other tattoos/piercings. *shrugs* different strokes for different folks I guess.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    I went to work Monday and actually approached someone. He was a douche who was trying to pay for sex but I still was able to get four dances out of him without promising him anything or being subjected to octopus hands.My confidence was through the roof but sadly there was no other clientle to approach the rest of the night. I'm going to try again tonight though. I make money but I'm ready to make consistent money.
    The worst they can say is no.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Quote Originally Posted by Driven View Post
    I went to work Monday and actually approached someone. He was a douche who was trying to pay for sex but I still was able to get four dances out of him without promising him anything or being subjected to octopus hands.My confidence was through the roof but sadly there was no other clientle to approach the rest of the night. I'm going to try again tonight though. I make money but I'm ready to make consistent money.
    a good strategy is to just believe that everyone wants you around. don't worry about not being his type or that he's looking for extras. just believe that he likes you and wants to buy dances.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    @PiperMonroe I like the Tony Robbins thing. It's totally about putting yourself out there.

    It's hard not to judge some customers but sometimes we do it any way.

    I do have mixed feelings about it. I always asks guys that I don't know whereas I know certain guys that are cheap, are jerks or I'm just not their type. So I don't bother with them.




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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    So far there is nothing but furniture in the building. I'm ready to try but there's no where to go. It's still somewhat early so I'm sure spenders will be here soon.
    The worst they can say is no.

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    Featured Member miss1dancypants's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    this may sound like bad advice but I make more money when I don't try as hard. 90% of the time, I make the most money when I sit at the bar and wait for customers to come up to me. I sit at the bar, drinking a water or a drink, looking happy and relaxed, and people come up to me. I set off good vibes. I see other girls, talking about how they are "the best hustlers in the club", talking to people at every single table. You see them go from table to table, moving to a new one every 1 or 2 songs... not getting dances. I feel like it makes them look desperate and like they are ONLY about the money (which we are, but if the customers know that then they don't want to spend). They end up getting turned down by every table, cuz all the customers see them getting turned down, cuz they put out the vibe that they just want to "hit and run"--take your money and dance. Which is OF COURSE what we want to do, but if they know that they won't spend money.

    So at my club, sitting at the bar, drinking a drink and looking happy and relaxed works for me... guys will come up to me and when we are done dances tell me how sweet and fun and nice I was. When really, I wasn't trying at all.

    This approach also helps me keep my energy throughout the night--I don't burn through all my energy trying to hustle customers who are just lost causes and will not spend any money no matter HOW hot I am or how well I hustle.

    Just my 2 cents

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    Quote Originally Posted by miss1dancypants View Post
    this may sound like bad advice but I make more money when I don't try as hard. 90% of the time, I make the most money when I sit at the bar and wait for customers to come up to me. I sit at the bar, drinking a water or a drink, looking happy and relaxed, and people come up to me. I set off good vibes. I see other girls, talking about how they are "the best hustlers in the club", talking to people at every single table. You see them go from table to table, moving to a new one every 1 or 2 songs... not getting dances. I feel like it makes them look desperate and like they are ONLY about the money (which we are, but if the customers know that then they don't want to spend). They end up getting turned down by every table, cuz all the customers see them getting turned down, cuz they put out the vibe that they just want to "hit and run"--take your money and dance. Which is OF COURSE what we want to do, but if they know that they won't spend money.

    So at my club, sitting at the bar, drinking a drink and looking happy and relaxed works for me... guys will come up to me and when we are done dances tell me how sweet and fun and nice I was. When really, I wasn't trying at all.

    This approach also helps me keep my energy throughout the night--I don't burn through all my energy trying to hustle customers who are just lost causes and will not spend any money no matter HOW hot I am or how well I hustle.

    Just my 2 cents
    I feel the same way... plus, if I am not feeling the crowd/table or I get a weird vibe from them, I will not approach them... I am a big believer of the Abraham-Hicks Law of Attraction AND staying in the Vortex (another thread in this forum): "if doesn't make me feel good, I won't do it". Period. Last Sat night, I sat for most of the night with this custie who keep playing games, after he called me in to work that night, but I was able to hustle him for $150, them approached 3 customers, and within 10secs or "wanna dance" sorta line, took them for LDs. All the other girls had to hustle hard for the money. It was a tough "potted plant" crowd. HORRIBLE. I made decent money for being in the cub for 4.5 hours

    I HATE SAT NITES. lol....

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    I agree with you competely. 90% of the men I appoached were douchebags. Now The only way I will appoach a guy is if he makes it obvious that he wants me.
    At least when you get appoached, you know that the guy is interested so it saves you the agony of having to kiss their asses and hope for a dance. I seen girls who approach guys, allow men to touch them and they also grind on the guys for free in hopes to get dances. I refuse to be one of those girls. I rather just chill and not get stressed out trying to hustle. If they like what they see they can come up to me, if they don"t, well I"m not dealing with it.

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    I forgot to add, although I generally don't approach people, I will obviously approach a guy who I have seen checking me out for like 5 minutes... or if a guy is just chilling and the bouncer tips me off that he has a lot of money. but even if they have a lot of money, doesn't mean they want to spend it. that's what happened last night... arrogant entitled little bastards who just live off of mommy and daddy's trust fund... i wanted to be like really dude if you are so awesome and think you're way to cool for this place then wtf are you doing here. go home and jack off

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    Default Re: I Dont Approah Everyone

    I have to look at it this way: What do I have to lose? All I have is money to gain. And anyway, there's nothing else to do. I'd rather talk to every customer and probably make money than sit by myself and watch other girls make money!

    I definitely agree, though, to not approach someone who gives you a bad vibe. It's not worth it, and if your intuition is right (which it probably is), then he'll just be a jerk and deter you from approaching others.

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