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Thread: Hating men

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    Default Hating men

    Just a quick question, but I often wonder if dancers hate men, less, more or pretty much the same as a woman that doesn't (or has never danced) ?

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Some do some don't. Some non dancers hate men some don't.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Non-dancer here...but a camgirl. I can say for every woman, it really depends on what type of guys you come in contact w/ all thru ur life. I know camming has opened my eyes on how much of the "weird" is out there. Which btw is more than what i had thought. lol I hate some men..but on the other hand some men I LOVE!! lmao

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    Default Re: Hating men

    I don't hate men. I hate everyone equally.

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    Moderator unbeleavable's Avatar
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    Default Re: Hating men

    They hate guys with gum in their hair...lol your on a roll.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Well I don't exactly glorify men...I'm quite thankful to this experience I've had with dancing so far because it has exposed me to a side of men that I don't think I would have ever seen otherwise.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    On the one hand, it has made me more suspicious of men and their motives. But, it also makes me insanely grateful for the handful of guys who are genuinely not assholes.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    disturbing to know that dancers have a proclivity to hating men due to the association to the daily grind at work. It is equally disturbing that the SC environment creates situations where men don't treat women with much respect and that the transactional boundaries between service and genuine entertainment is an toxic mix of unfulfilled expectations and guarded affection. It's ironic and it almost ruins it for the customers who are there for the pure entertainment of the experience. I think that the best form of entertainment and diversion at a gentlemen's club is truly a lost art for many dancers and customers

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    Default Re: Hating men

    awesome thoughts. rock on.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Ill admit it... Im a man hater. Which sucks cause I was always one who got along better with men. I mean I love men, but I really don't trust any of them anymore. If you met me in person you would never know it though, but sadly this industry has led me to believe 95% of men have some sort of icy soul that is really just looking out for number 1. Not necessarily a bad thing because they've taught me to be a little more ruthless.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    What a great topic! I've been questioning my attitude about this recently. I never questioned whether I hated men until this last year.

    I really enjoyed associating with most of the guys I've come across in the clubs over the years... but, I rarely put up with a guy I did not want to put up with. So no, dancing itself has not made me resent men overall. It's the BF's and husband that make me question.

    I suddenly realize that when I was in the clubs, I actually had more respect for men overall and since I've taken time off, I've found myself falling into seeing men as I see the one's who've done me wrong in my personal life and I only remember the nice guys at the club... well, there were a few incidences that I'll never forget... but, nothing compared to what occurred between the men I allowed into my personal life (boyfriends, husbands) the stuff those guys did haunts me now ... I'm planning to get over it by Friday though LOL

    I think dancing and camming especially, serve to EDUCATE women on the reality of male tendencies in general. They are simply different animals ... we are mostly alike, but with definite differences. In my city, there are approximately 20 topless clubs and countless nude clubs and only one weekly male strip revue at a regular bar for like 4 hours ... this disparity is precisely because of our gender differences.

    I recently hung out with some of my male friends and it hit me, those guys are great ... My Dad is great (although my Mom may think diff LOL) and my brothers are great ... My sons are great. I've worked for some really nice men. Even my X who bullied me with legal action for 5 years, is now great. So whenever I feel like hating men, I think of them and I realize that no matter what gender a person is, I cannot automatically assume they are like the few bad apples.

    I will say this though, I always wonder if I'd been able to command more respect from my BF's/Hubby, had I never been a dancer. Perhaps I would have attracted different types of men, although I'm not so sure. Anyways, my dancing was a problem in all my relationships, even if I quit for the sake of the relationship, that was never appreciated.

    For those of you who are finding yourselves falling into that "resentment of the male species" category, simply use good judgement about the men you allow into your bed or that you allow to intertwine into your life and refuse to deal with the jerks at work. Get to know yourself and follow your gut ... if it's twisting and wrenching, it's a sign to change something.
    Last edited by pollywogg; 08-17-2011 at 01:16 AM. Reason: opportunity to use a much more groovy word & an afterthought, cuz I just can't stop myself

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Dancing made me like men more
    Tiny tweaks----->BIG CHANGES

    Quote Originally Posted by Kirakonstantin View Post
    More fear-mongering? Really? Yes, this is not the 1990's anymore. Yes, things are changing. Either dance or don't. Freaking out and sowing fear isn't going to help anyone.




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    Default Re: Hating men

    Any service industry job is going to make women bitter sometimes. Maybe only 20 percent of men are stupid enough to believe that women exist solely for their pleasure, but when you deal with a hundred or so men on any given night, guess who you're going to remember?

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    Default Re: Hating men

    I don't hate men. I hate assholes. Unfortunately there are a lot of assholes.


    tessarubyxoxo: somehow i ended up on SW's homepage.... then i clicked on "forums." & i was in fucking narnia.


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    Default Re: Hating men

    Quote Originally Posted by Jessie_tinydancer View Post
    Ill admit it... Im a man hater. Which sucks cause I was always one who got along better with men. I mean I love men, but I really don't trust any of them anymore. If you met me in person you would never know it though, but sadly this industry has led me to believe 95% of men have some sort of icy soul that is really just looking out for number 1. Not necessarily a bad thing because they've taught me to be a little more ruthless.
    I don't know anyone who isn't primary looking out for themselves. 95% of men? Try 100% of people. Do you truly personally know people where that is not true? I'm not talking about occasionally giving to charity, holding a door for someone, or other behavior that to me is just basic humanity. I mean a person who more often than not, puts another person first?
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    I don't know anyone who isn't primary looking out for themselves. 95% of men? Try 100% of people. Do you truly personally know people where that is not true? I'm not talking about occasionally giving to charity, holding a door for someone, or other behavior that to me is just basic humanity. I mean a person who more often than not, puts another person first?
    I dont think that is true at all.....I'm thinking about people with kids & people with SO's. I put them first. If my wife and kids are OK...then I am fine.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Well let me tell you all how we feel about you.....

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    Default Re: Hating men

    we LOVE you all!!!

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Quote Originally Posted by skwadim View Post
    Just a quick question, but I often wonder if dancers hate men, less, more or pretty much the same as a woman that doesn't (or has never danced) ?
    Definitely way more. We see their true colours come out. Their animal instincts, rather. I honestly believe that, given the opportunity, 99% of men would cheat. Just a lot of them are too lazy or not conventionally attractive enough to attract their physical ideals.

    I would just be thankful you get to see their true colours so you aren't naive. Just remember that good men do exist, you are just more fine-tuned for weeding the bad ones out!

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Quote Originally Posted by lopaw View Post
    It may be just a coincidence, but I have noticed in the past year or so alot more dancers venting to me about their disgust with men. And it seems genuine, not just a man-hating ploy to try to get me to buy more dances

    Could be many things, but the attitude seems to have increased, or at least they are more verbal about it. I attribute a large part of it to the crappy economy, which forces many to work longer to try to earn half as much. It's stressful and when you're stressed, even little annoyances can turn into BFD's.
    Could be just personal experience... but I find that men who still have money out here have upped the douche factor x10 in the last year or so.
    Not ITC necessarily... but in general.
    So I'm not surprised to here it.

    Idk why girls are talking to you about men, though. I'd be like T_T Finally! I get to touch a woman! It's been so long!
    Serious short of lady customers on the north end of the city.
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    I don't know anyone who isn't primary looking out for themselves. 95% of men? Try 100% of people. Do you truly personally know people where that is not true? I'm not talking about occasionally giving to charity, holding a door for someone, or other behavior that to me is just basic humanity. I mean a person who more often than not, puts another person first?
    I guess you never met my mother or myself... I was taught to look after people. And Im talking about being cut-throat. Like lying and cheating to get ahead. As in spending an entire LD telling me about how much you love your wife and then offering me $5K to sleep with you... meanwhile their wife is at home being their mother and giving everything. I doubt many women behave this way. They are caregivers.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    Quote Originally Posted by lemiwinks31 View Post
    I dont think that is true at all.....I'm thinking about people with kids & people with SO's. I put them first. If my wife and kids are OK...then I am fine.
    And I know not ALL men are this way, but just saying working in the club has led me to believe the proportion of "good" men is much smaller than I initially believed and hence has caused me to resent them. But at the end of the day I still get along very well with men.. maybe its because I know what Im dealing with and Im not shocked when they do something silly.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    My attitude towards males has vastly improved since I retired from dancing. And I'm not a man-hater and never was. When I danced super-high contact, the disgust was much greater.

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    Default Re: Hating men

    I'm pretty sure women hate men about as much as men hate women.

    Does that answer your question?




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    Default Re: Hating men

    I only dislike men that give me a reason to dislike them. I will admit that I've found myself ready to make a quick witted comment when a guy at the store looks at me--since that usually means they're going to hit on me at my work. Most of the time people leave me alone when I'm not at work, which is pretty standard--you don't want a sexual harassment lawsuit.

    Anyhow, I guess I am more hypersensitive to things men say/do around me after I started dancing. I'm quicker to react, slower to deal with bullshit, and I stand up for myself with more confidence.
    If you are willing to do for one year what other's won't, you can spend a lifetime doing what other's cant.


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