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Thread: Questions about Stripper Behavior

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    Default Questions about Stripper Behavior

    I just discovered this site today and I hope that the ladies here don't mind that I'm asking so many questions. It's just that I've long been a casual customer at strip clubs and there have been certain incidents that have sort of stuck in my mind over the years. I can't really get an honest answer at the clubs about any of this, because the girls there are selling a product essentially, and so they don't have any interest in showing their cards. But since this community is populated by lades in the trade, perhaps some of you can shed some light on these topics.

    Here are three incidents that took place during visits to strip clubs that I've never quite been able to figure out.

    1) Every so often I'll be at a strip club, and a girl that I'm eyeing simply won't come over to me. I won't be with another girl at the time or anything, and the girl that I'm trying to attract will be alone as well. I'm not saying I'm Brad Pitt. I'm probably more of an average looking guy. So I was wondering if some girls are just sort of waiting around for a hot guy to show up, or if the girl is just sizing me up as someone who won't spend a lot of money. Or is she just shy? I know any of these could be possible, but I figured that other strippers may see this a lot and might be able to analyze it in a way that I cannot.

    2) At two different clubs, one in Las Vegas of all places, I received a very special kind of lap dance. This dance consisted of the stripper taking me to the private dance area, positioning me on the couch so that I'm actually laying flat on my back, and then mounting me and grinding against me for the entire song. Essentially it was like several minutes of dry humping. I'm pretty sure that both of these girls were trying to get me off, as both wanted to "keep going" for another song, knowing full well what was going to happen if they did. Also, in the Vegas club, while I stopped before any mess was made, one of the guys I went to the club with got a dance from the same girl and he kept going until he got the happy ending that he wanted. So I guess my question is whether this sort of stuff is frowned upon by most strippers. I don't see a lot of strippers doing this. Like I said, only two so far, and I've been to a lot of clubs. Does this fall into the "extras" category that most girls don't think very highly of?

    3) Okay, this is the one that really confuses me. This one girl, who I've only seen once, gave me a private dance and after it was over she kissed me on the lips. In fact, she kissed me twice, once after the dance and once after I tipped her. I was kind of shocked because from everything I've heard even a lot of escorts have a "no kissing" policy, because kissing is so intimate and also for health reasons. Is this fairly rare? Should I assume that this girl was kissing every guy who bought a dance from her?

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    It varies but this is from my experience:

    1)Dancers do tend to get certain customers so they will often ignore other customers. This is probably the biggest mistake I've seen other dancers make. They will often ignore guys because he's not their usual type. For instance my customers were generally older professional men and younger men didn't usually like me. I mostly ignored younger guys if I was busy and was making money. If not then I would go and ask them because sometimes I was proven wrong. I actually had a few younger guys approach me for dances. If you are interested in someone approach her. I never rejected a man based on looks. On the contrary most of my regulars were unattractive.

    2) I believe this is called a couch dance and while I never did it I've heard of it. To me it sounds gross but not much worse than friction dances. Depending on the area it could be an extra but in other places it's common.

    3)There has been a lot of talk about dancers who kiss, including French kissing. The only time I ever kissed a customer was on the cheek and he was a regular. I should say I did kiss (including French kiss)a customer but he was someone I ended up dating 15 years after I left rhe club and I was in love with him. Otherwise, no I would never kiss a man on the lips unless he was a boyfriend. However, I've been hearing kissing is becoming common and is now expected in some places.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    I'm going to +1 on your idea that the dancer may be shy, because there is a surprisingly large amount of shy dancers out there. Like, it's one thing to be okay with getting naked in front of a crowd, but some girls just get terrified of approaching customers and it either takes them a long time to do it or they depend on customers approaching them. Basically, if you see a girl you like, sometimes you've just gotta go up to her yourself! The only time I could possibly think of a girl rejecting a customer coming up to her is if she'd danced for him before and it was an unpleasant experience. I doubt he'd be going up to her though if that was the case!

    As for your kissing dancer, I would say that yes, it's safe to assume she's kissing other customers if you're getting kisses from her so easily. How common it is depends on the area/club, but I feel like it can't be that common of an occurrence where you are if you're still wondering about it.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Scenario 1) as Kellydancer said, she may assess you as not her type of customer - which has nothing to do with your attractiveness but could be either your age bracket (she does best with older or younger guys) or a non-spender (if you're nursng one beer and ignoring offers of dancers then this usually shows you're not going to be a spender) or she may have been waiting on a regular (it's not worth keeping a regular big spender waiting or missing him for the sake of one $20 dance). Solution: approach the girl you're interested in, beckon her over or ask someone to fetch her, we're not psychic.

    Scenario 2) couch dances do happen in some clubs - it's not as though the dancer is necessarily trying to finish you off it's just that another song = another $20.

    Scenario 3) kissing does seem to be getting more frequent. Solution: don't do it. Do you really want to be where tens of other lips with go knows what have been all night??? Turn your cheek and leave it at that if the dancer comes puckered towards you (she'll probably be secretly pleased that you have some decorum).

    Happy dancing!

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    Thumbs up Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    I'm not saying I'm Brad Pitt. I'm probably more of an average looking guy. So I was wondering if some girls are just sort of waiting around for a hot guy to show up, or if the girl is just sizing me up as someone who won't spend a lot of money.
    Hon we're looking to make money not get a date.

    Also most good looking guys tend to be cocky and don't spend money so they are best avoided.

    whether this sort of stuff is frowned upon by most strippers. I don't see a lot of strippers doing this.
    Does this fall into the "extras" category that most girls don't think very highly of?
    Yes. It's not my job to get guys off it's my job to entertain and be good company.




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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by Stripper Hacks View Post
    Hon we're looking to make money not get a date.
    That's a good point. One of the things I've learned in the last couple of days as I've perused this forum is that, yes, stripping really is a JOB and not a social situation. I guess I had previously been under the (admittedly silly) impression that stripping was kind of a half-job, half-party, where girls were trying to have fun socially and make money at the same time. But now I realize that the strip club is a purely professional setting for the dancers, and that the goal, as with any professional, is to do the best job they can and make as much money as possible. I feel like I've gained a whole new perspective after reading this blog :-)

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    1) She could by shy and figures if you were really into her, you'd come up to her. It's stupid that some dancers do this, but it could happen. She could also, as Kellydancer said, be sizing you up as not "her type of customer." Are you younger? Do you usually sit with friends? Do you make it obvious that you're not tipping and turning down other dancers, even if it's for the cause of waiting for that one girl? Honestly, if you really want her that badly and she's alone, I say forget trying to figure out her behavior and just go up and ask her to come sit with you for a drink or for a dance. There could be numerous reasons she isn't coming over to you, but I doubt any of them are personal and she would turn you down if you approached her. So go get what you came there to get.

    2) I've heard of these kinds of dances but I don't know if it's the norm to do it until the guy cums. I think the girls who do that are the same kind who do the same sort of hardcore grinding during a regular lap/couch dance. If it's their intention to make you cum, then yes, I would consider them extras girls. If the guy came without her intent, that would different, but this case sounds as if they knew exactly what the end goal was. They think that's how they make money and gain repeat customers.

    3) Personally, I think kissing customers is weird - but apparently, it's popping up. I was weirded the fuck out when I read the recent thread about a girl starting at a club where the girls were expected to kiss for tips. I think this is nasty, but I guess it's common in some places. I won't try to figure out why this is becoming a thing, but... yeah... it's out there.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by KeithDoxen View Post
    That's a good point. One of the things I've learned in the last couple of days as I've perused this forum is that, yes, stripping really is a JOB and not a social situation. I guess I had previously been under the (admittedly silly) impression that stripping was kind of a half-job, half-party, where girls were trying to have fun socially and make money at the same time. But now I realize that the strip club is a purely professional setting for the dancers, and that the goal, as with any professional, is to do the best job they can and make as much money as possible. I feel like I've gained a whole new perspective after reading this blog :-)
    You and the rest of the punters, hun. This is the perspective most of you lack and frankly, if you all could understand then it'd make out lives easier. Sometimes i'd love to go into the workplace of the customers and treat them in the same way they do us...

    Salesman: "Hi ma'am are you interested in this $4000 home cinema system"
    Me: "oh sugar, i never pay for my electronics... how about i buy you a donut, here have one with me and tell me, why are you doing this?" - as i refuse to leave the store, and just hang around looking as though i'm interested in buying but really just watching the free TV.

    To "have fun socially" i go out with my friends to a club/ theatre/ restaurant, I don't put on a day-glow thong and fondle my boobs at middle aged men. It's a bit like the staff at a fast food joint - they don't actually give a fuck if you've had a nice day, they just want to do their job, make sure the service is delivered according to the handbook, that nothing goes horribly wrong and they can make their money and go back to their lives at the end of the shift.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by spartaca View Post
    You and the rest of the punters, hun. This is the perspective most of you lack and frankly, if you all could understand then it'd make out lives easier.
    I actually wonder whether a lot of custies would stop coming to strip clubs if they were honest with themselves about the fact that it's essentially the sale of a product, as you said, no different than the Best Buy guy selling you a TV. I think that a lot of custies are there not just for the grinding, but for the fantasy. I mean, take me. I'm 33 years old. I was in a couple of LTRs in my 20s, that both ended. I was also in and out of college and grad school during my 20s, so I was surrounded by hot girls, and I had one of those jobs for awhile where there are lots of young, attractive coworkers to hang out with. I rarely went to strip clubs during this period, because I got tons of attention from girls everywhere. Even if the girls weren't into me, they were there. I could talk to them, flirt with them, make lame attempts to ask them out, etc.

    But when I turned 30, and school was well behind me, and I had a grown-up job with other grown-ups, and I didn't have a girlfriend, all of the sudden I started hitting up strip clubs again. This was really the first time I went regularly since college. And for the past 2 or 3 years I've gone pretty regularly, like every couple of months or so. A guy like me isn't just going for the dances, so that's certainly a part of it. We're also going for the attention. You know, for the feeling that comes from having a bunch of hot girls around, smiling at one and seeing her smile back, flirting with another, chatting with another, etc. Deep down inside, we know you're not coming over because you think we're "kinda cute," and we also know that you're not all that one in a million girl who is hot and single and looking to date a guy she just met at the strip club. But it's that fantasy that we're buying, I think.

    The most money I ever spent on a girl in a strip club was when a stripper approached me very confidently, started rubbing my arm, looked into my eyes like she wanted me, and said something like, "Baby, you're mine." For girls who want to improve their hustle, it really isn't complicated. It's all about convincing the guy that you really, truly, honestly do want him, even though everyone involved knows it's all a bunch of nonsense. It's all about the fantasy.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    About #3, I think that kisses on the cheeks are more than fine since I see them as a greeting rather than a sexual advance. But on the lips? Yeah, that's just wrong and unsanitary. If I feel a customer wants to kiss me, I'd turn my face so he'll kiss my cheeks instead. Never had one forcing himself on me.





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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    2. ) Dancers who get a guy off are really really really really stupid. You can make way more by teasing and teasing . Selling a couple of dances is nothing in comparision to selling MANY dances. I hate stupid dancers.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Agreed.

    Quote Originally Posted by KeithDoxen View Post
    it really isn't complicated. It's all about convincing the guy that you really, truly, honestly do want him, even though everyone involved knows it's all a bunch of nonsense. It's all about the fantasy.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    If you are interested in someone approach her. I never rejected a man based on looks. On the contrary most of my regulars were unattractive.
    Amen.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by Stripper Hacks View Post
    Also most good looking guys tend to be cocky and don't spend money so they are best avoided.
    And this too - so true.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by KeithDoxen View Post
    ...now I realize that the strip club is a purely professional setting for the dancers, and that the goal, as with any professional, is to do the best job they can and make as much money as possible. I feel like I've gained a whole new perspective after reading this blog :-)
    I think it's interesting how opinions can differ from guys who find this site. Some decide, after reading for a few days, that dancers are cold money-hungry bitches who are somehow sub-human because they take the job of being naked in front of strangers seriously and insist on being paid well for it. Most of these guys end up getting bored and leaving after a few days or get banned. Others, Keith here being a good example, actually read what the ladies and experienced customers have to say and manage to learn something! I'm pretty jaded when it comes to clubs. The first stripper I ever met was working her way through Boston University back in the late 70's when I was a student there. Before I ever saw a woman dance naked I already understood that they didn't do it for fun. Everyone has their own learning curve and some never learn at all...
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
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    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
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    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I think it's interesting how opinions can differ from guys who find this site. Some decide, after reading for a few days, that dancers are cold money-hungry bitches who are somehow sub-human because they take the job of being naked in front of strangers seriously and insist on being paid well for it. Most of these guys end up getting bored and leaving after a few days or get banned.
    I think most guys come here expecting to find out that there's an easy way to get strippers to "like" them, or to find out that their favorite stripper really does like them and they didn't even know it, or to find out that stripping is a real turn on for the strippers and that the strippers are generally attracted to their customers, turned on during lap dances, etc. All it takes is a couple days on this site for guys to realize that their favorite stripper has been playing them, and that pretty much all strippers are off limits for OTC action, unless it's P4P, and that strippers spend all their time talking about how to make the most money in the club, and pretty much zero time talking about customers that they're in love with or tickle fights in the dressing room. It does seem that once the guys figure this out, they either get bored and leave or lash out at the strippers for ruining their fantasy.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    @KeithDoxen Most guys who read this forum need to develop a good thick skin, just like we dancers have to in order to survive in this biz. First and foremost this is a place for strippers to talk about "us", and about our industry, it is not a support forum for customers. We could care less if you guys get your knickers in a knot because we're talking about how to maximize our earnings.

    Tough titties fellas. If you can't take the heat, get the hell out of the kitchen.

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    Default Re: Questions about Stripper Behavior

    1) There are so many different possibilities. The dancer could have a certain type of customer in mind, she could be waiting on a regular, she could be in a bad mood/tired, she could be shy, etc. If talking to her is important to you. Go up and ask if you can buy her a drink. I'm always appreciative of a customer that comes to me instead (unless he's a complete creep). Sometimes a guy will come up to me and confess he'd been trying to get my attention and I was just too busy or had my mind somewhere else. If she is not interested in you, she's not going to say it, so watch her body language to see if she may be genuinely interested or looking for an escape.

    2) It is definitely an "extras" activity. Its a sexual act. Dances are supposed to be sensual and erotic...and most importantly, a fantasy. Dry humping a man until he ejaculates in his pants is making things a little too real. According to my club, its prostitution.

    3) Everyone has their certain rules and things they do and don't like. It sounds like this girl isn't bothered by close, intimate contact with her customers. Personally, I would never do this as I am mindful of germs, the rules, and my reputation as a dancer. Just remember, if she's willing to do this to you, shes probably already done it to the five other guys before you.

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