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Thread: intellectual conversation

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    Veteran Member lovelydancer's Avatar
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    Default intellectual conversation

    I just wanted a little bit of advice and if anyone can help me out I'd greatly appreciate it! I danced in a full nude, full contact club for 2 years, took some time off (about 8 months), and am now going back to dancing for probably another year before I'm done for good.

    When I danced before while I had shifts when I made money...I also had plenty when I didn't. I think it's because of the following comment guys would tell me, "you sound too smart for your own good"..or.."your not dumb enough to do what I am looking for"..or something along those lines, and it sucks! BUT; then when I tried to play dumb, it was very obvious and unbelievable. How do have conversations with them without sounding "too smart"? Thanks!

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    Featured Member sierra.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Ugh I have this same problem sometimes. A friend of mine who is an amazing hustler gave me some advice, and said to always keep the conversation light. If I don't get the vibe that the customer would enjoy wit/intellectual conversation, I try not to let the conversation get that deep. As my friend put it, stay away from "Well techincally Pluto isn't a planet because blah blah blah" and stay focused on being flirty and fun.
    Another thing I like to do is read through Hustle Hut and make lists of different flirty lines and conversation topics. Since this kind of talking doesn't come as natural to me, reading over my lists before work help me come up with things to say that are flirtier, and also puts me in the right mindset. If you are interested I can share my lists with you.

    hot flirting tips 2k13: tell him, “I’m not like other girls,” then pull down the secret zipper at the back of your neck to reveal your true reptilian form


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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    I always have the urge to tell the custies off. Especially if they are wrong. I find if I act drunk and silly I make more money than being myself. I been told, to check my brain out when entering hell (the club). So sad! There are guys at my old club would pay me a lot more cus they thought I didn't speak English. I simply smile and say okay and very happy a dozen times. I felt like Sally the seal. All I need is some flippers!

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    Veteran Member lovelydancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    I always have a hard time not letting the conversation get too deep. Sierra the list is a really great idea, if you could sent me the list that'd be awesome of you. It'd definitely put me in the perfect work mindset. And lady, I probably should start acting drunk! At least they think they'd have the "upper hand" because they think I'm hammered. Little would they know, I always have the upper hand! Lol

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    Veteran Member lovelydancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Any addition advice would be great

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    Featured Member Laurisa's Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    If you are a good hustler then you shouldn't have to spend more than 1-3 songs with a customer, if that, depending on the flow of your club. In the first 5 minutes of conversation (which is essentially how long a conversation should be before you move on if he's not spending yet) you should not make the conversation based on anything serious. If you were going up to a guy at a bar because you knew you wanted a one night stand, you wouldn't exactly start spouting off about how scientists recently discovered a prehistoric bacteria in Australia that lived off of sulfur oxide before there was oxygen on Earth so that there could possibly be life on Mars...blah blah (true story!)

    Anyway, make the conversation revolve around him and most importantly, dances. Make sure you find out what he does, if he's local, if he's been to the club before, if he's with anyone, if there is a special occasion, what he did earlier in the day, and so forth. No need to bring up much of anything. If he says he built a car last year and he sounds like a total retard because you grew up working on cars since you were 12-years-old with your cousin...SO WHAT!? Let it go. Customers are retarded, let them have their moment to shine. No need to correct them or get into a friendly debate about what they are saying. Just smile and act enthused. You can add a witty little jab if the guy is a prick at the end, no worries.

    Go in for the sale. If he is beating around the bush, move on.
    If you are willing to do for one year what other's won't, you can spend a lifetime doing what other's cant.


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    Veteran Member lovelydancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    I do need to remember to monitor how long I'm sitting with the customers. At the clubs in our area, girls will end up sitting with guys between 9-30min. It's sooooo long. And even though are area has a lot of clubs, they don't have a lot of high quality customers. So girls end up butter them up forever before anything happens. As far as my hustle goes, it's probably about 50/50. It's def not bad by any means, but it can use improvement. Most of the time I introduce myself, get the guys name, where he's from, what he does, and generally bs about the club before discussing dances. My best friend who is a dancer, said she dirty talks in their ears and she banks...but I'm not very good at that. I do try though, but when I do, they sometimes end up asking for extras as a result of dirty talk, which I don't do. I haven't found a happy medium yet.

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    Featured Member Laurisa's Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Personally, I don't consider asking someone basic questions about themselves to be a hustle.

    A hustle is adaptive, cunning, and resourceful for your current circumstance (i.e. customer). A true "hustle" would be getting a customer to spend all his money on you because he is either in "love" with you or your game is so good that he doesn't realize how fast he's pouring out the dough. It's getting him to give you the goods while creating the illusion that you are giving him what he really wants.

    A hustle can be dirty (literally and figuratively), witty, intelligent, quick and easy, it can involve a teaser rate, etc.

    An example of a teaser rate/dirty hustle (figuratively):
    You tell a customer that the club is running a 2 dance for $30 special (which my club does) and then you go back to the Executive Lounge to do the lap dance. Essentially, the first dance is $20 and the second dance is $10, it is not $15 per dance--you must buy the first dance at $20 to receive the discount...

    So, before the first dance starts then you say "Dances are $20, but it's $40 to touch everything except my vagina"! 90% of the time they agree to the $40 for the first song versus the stupid 2 for 30 and then you either continue and most of the time they hand you $80 because they forgot all about the 2 for 30 or you keep your $40 and made $10 more in 1/2 the time of the 2 for 30 deal (2 songs).

    ^^That is an example of a "dirty" hustle that I use.
    If you are willing to do for one year what other's won't, you can spend a lifetime doing what other's cant.


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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Let them do the talking. In order not to seem too dumb, listen intently, nod, smile, make little encouraging noises (mmhmm, yes, uhuh) and comment on what they're saying, but try to be the one with the questions not the answers. If you feel the conversation is going to far, say 'wow, you seem really smart.' It'll feed his ego but also bring the conversation down a notch, without making you look bad.
    As irritating as it is to sit there and listen to someone talk about a subject you'd like to join in on too, you're not there to feed your own ego.

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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Playing dumb=men thinking they may be able to take advantage of u(even though this is false)=more money what a bunch of bs...

    Truthfully I love it when the intelligent customers appreciate beauty. poise , and intellect in a dancer. The nasty customers disgust me and dont get much of my time.

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    Veteran Member pipermonroe's Avatar
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    You can be your smart self but in my experience this almost always lands you in the friend-zone with customers and you quickly become "that dancer who's fun to talk with," but not the one who gets dances. It works both ways though. I don't want to hear his life story either. Maybe I'm making up some of my own fantasies about him and the more he talks, the quicker those fantasies pop like soap bubbles.


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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by sierra. View Post
    Another thing I like to do is read through Hustle Hut and make lists of different flirty lines and conversation topics. Since this kind of talking doesn't come as natural to me, reading over my lists before work help me come up with things to say that are flirtier, and also puts me in the right mindset. If you are interested I can share my lists with you.
    Could you share your lists? That'd be awesome. I've been trying to do the same thing to keep the conversation interesting but still focused on fun/pleasure. Intelligent convo with little flirty/fun/sexy things thrown in from time to time works well for me. I don't usually play the dumb schoolgirl thing b/c I enjoy the smart/seductive thing quite a bit more. If the convo starts getting too heavy I like to throw in some flirty commentary or gently change subject to something more appropriate for the mood.


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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    I love that everyone is just like "Oh Sierra, you did all this work compiling a list off advice from this site, can I just have it for free instead of taking five minutes to look myself!?"
    It's just a little funny because I see a lot of girls around here get pissy at people expecting ANYTHING from them for free.


    Onnn topic. I choose my generic interests as conversation topics to steer clear of "intelligent conversation". I'll talk about comic books and Dr. Who or how I like to add rhinestones to things. It's not really hard to find random bullshit to talk about that's not necessarily an "intelligent" topic.
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    I haven't read all the responses yet, but I wanted to add: If you absolutely CAN'T play dumb (Which is what they want), then play slutty-Dom. Slutty-dom can be smart, whitty and clever. She's dominate, sexy, intelligent and men seem to dig that persona. If you can mingle your smart-makin' in with some sexy, vampy attitude it can work for you. Red lips help. As will sarcastic cut-downs.

    But seriously, it's best to play the part of the stupid-slut. I've seen maybe 5% of dancers bank off being smart, it takes a special kind for that.



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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by 4everresolutions View Post
    I haven't read all the responses yet, but I wanted to add: If you absolutely CAN'T play dumb (Which is what they want), then play slutty-Dom. Slutty-dom can be smart, whitty and clever. She's dominate, sexy, intelligent and men seem to dig that persona. If you can mingle your smart-makin' in with some sexy, vampy attitude it can work for you. Red lips help. As will sarcastic cut-downs.

    But seriously, it's best to play the part of the stupid-slut. I've seen maybe 5% of dancers bank off being smart, it takes a special kind for that.

    Yeah I had a guy still tip me for my time but he told me "You are so bloody intelligent it ruined the fantasy I had of you as soon as you opened your mouth and I saw you as a living, intelligent being with a great arse as opposed to a bimbo with a great arse"
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    Default Re: intellectual conversation

    I agree that a lot of men are at the club for a good time and not intellectual conversation. But I have also met some big spenders who do want to know your thoughts and perspectives on the world. Dancing is after all about human connections not just physical ones. Be true to yourself and the costumers will respect you more for who you are.

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