Results 1 to 12 of 12

Thread: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

  1. #1
    Senior Member MiaStarr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Your lap.
    Posts
    184
    Thanks
    336
    Thanked 104 Times in 59 Posts
    My Mood
    Blah

    Default Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    I've only been dancing for 11 shifts total (2-3 times a week) and it seems that only 1 in 5 guys are decent and respectful about my boundaries, and enjoy a good strip-tease and dance, and they tip well too. The club regulars is the problem - these barflies have been coming to the club for years (according to the club staff and other dancers) and they try to get away with all kinds of stuff - groping, kissing and expecting way more than they should, and it seems they get it too from certain girls!

    Then there's management turning a blind eye ...

    Despite "token" rules being posted in the DR about no grinding customers or customers touching us on the floor (nothing about this is mentioned about the VIP areas btw) it seems like dancers are getting away with way more even doing table dances for a measly 10 bucks than they should be because the managers are turning a blind eye. The VIP rooms are never checked (don't know if there are cameras but I haven't seen any that is noticeable). The most "monitoring" that happens in the VIP's is that the waitress will pop her head in quickly to say "last song" to signify the end of the VIP session.

    Just venting ... ...
    Last edited by MiaStarr; 08-29-2011 at 11:44 AM.

  2. #2
    Veteran Member pipermonroe's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Los Angeles
    Posts
    458
    Thanks
    80
    Thanked 383 Times in 166 Posts

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    My club has gotten progressively more handsy in the past two years. While once we could depend on bouncers to keep custy's hands from roaming it is now up to us. It was easier to make the bouncer the bad guy, saying "Don't touch, the bouncer will throw you out!" but now we have to somehow manage to be authoritarian and desirable at the same time.

    I guess just set boundaries from the beginning. I know it's much harder but there are many girls at my club who get VIP's from men who don't do much touching. You just have to police the guy pretty much constantly. In our way of thinking we go "I told you not to touch me 10 seconds ago, why are you doing it again?" but they will keep trying so you keep telling them. It's no wonder some girls (me included sometimes) just think, Fuck, fine, touch my boob, just gimmie the damn money. It's tough.


  3. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to pipermonroe For This Useful Post:


  4. #3
    Senior Member MiaStarr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Your lap.
    Posts
    184
    Thanks
    336
    Thanked 104 Times in 59 Posts
    My Mood
    Blah

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    Thanks Piper.

    It's such a learning curve being a new dancer! I'll just stick to my guns and keep focusing on the positives. I'm beginning to see why some girls don't make it after only dancing a few weeks or why they start getting bitter about men after dancing for some years.

  5. #4
    Featured Member Stripper Hacks's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2009
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    1,256
    Thanks
    687
    Thanked 484 Times in 277 Posts
    My Mood
    Happy

    Reminder Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    it is now up to us.
    When was it ever up to any one else?

    @MiaStarr Just tell customers "I don't allow touching".

    If they don't spend money on you I don't see how this is a problem.

    I tell guys this all the time some keep getting dances and some are big babies about it.

    It's always up to you.

    Move their hands to your waist or hips or put them behind their head. Move your body away from their hands.

    If they get really aggressive or too gropy say "I like this better ..." then offer a compromise. Like hands around the waist, at their sides, on the booth or whatever.

    "Are you going to let me dance or not?" is also effective.

    If they are still being assholes stop the dance and tell them that you can't keep dancing for them if they are going to keep acting the way they are. Or end the dance and them to pay you.

    If they argue tell them it's for your time taken off the floor.




  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Stripper Hacks For This Useful Post:


  7. #5
    Senior Member MiaStarr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Your lap.
    Posts
    184
    Thanks
    336
    Thanked 104 Times in 59 Posts
    My Mood
    Blah

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    @StripperHacks Great advice thanks.

    I do set my boundaries and while dancing I'll either remind Mr. Gladhands, if needed, or take their hands in my own and guide away from my body. I don't mind them touching my waist or legs, so, depending on the guy & how grope-happy he is I'll put his hands on my hips or waist. I have big boobs & prominent nipples so these are always a target! Learning to move out of mouth-range quickly! Just tiresome to have to keep fending off unwanted touching even after making my boundaries clear - but maybe I'm not being clear enough so I'm taking all advice to heart!

  8. #6
    Featured Member luscious sadie's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    1,586
    Thanks
    1,166
    Thanked 2,383 Times in 779 Posts
    My Mood
    Busy

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    welcome to the lovely world of dancing.

    before I even start to dance I say "my rules are really easy: no nipples, no pussy, no mouth contact" and then I wait for them to respond and then say "thank you for respecting my boundaries". If during the dance they do something I don't like, I move their hands and say "remember, no _____". If they do it again, I momentarily stop the dance, look them in the eyes and say "I said no ____. If you do it again, we're going to stop and you're going to pay me and get thrown out." I have found this to be very successful.

    further, if you know certain customers are handsy, don't dance for them. The wonderful thing about stripping is that you can (and should) choose who to dance for. Hold your customers to a standard.
    [/center]

    Quote Originally Posted by Laurisa View Post
    Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy shit.

  9. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to luscious sadie For This Useful Post:


  10. #7
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    2,066
    Thanks
    440
    Thanked 1,844 Times in 779 Posts

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    mia, please remember to get your money up front. how this seems to never get mentioned to new dancers is beyond me, but this will save you a lot of trouble, and it will also help you maintain boundaries because you know that you don't have to tolerate x, y, and z in order to get paid. the money is in your hands and it is up to them to play by your rules if they want to enjoy the show.

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to camille27 For This Useful Post:


  12. #8
    Banned
    Joined
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Colorado!
    Posts
    6,053
    Thanks
    3,775
    Thanked 3,701 Times in 1,713 Posts

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    Like Camille said, ALWAYS get your money up front and DO NOT be afraid to walk out. I used to use the three strikes rule. On the third offense, I would simply walk out of the dance or VIP.

    It is your body. Only you can stick up for it.

  13. #9
    Featured Member Laurisa's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Doesn't Matter
    Posts
    1,969
    Thanks
    649
    Thanked 1,823 Times in 587 Posts
    My Mood
    Confused

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    "If you touch me again it'll cost you $500, NO warnings, and the fine will be enFORCEd"
    If you are willing to do for one year what other's won't, you can spend a lifetime doing what other's cant.


  14. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Laurisa For This Useful Post:


  15. #10
    God/dess J.D.'s Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2006
    Location
    aqui
    Posts
    3,622
    Thanks
    1,005
    Thanked 2,433 Times in 978 Posts

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    You need to learn how to detach and zone out so you can take the sexual assault, because that's exactly what it is. Watch the tv, think about how much you made that night, count sheep, whatever, as you fend off the guy's hands and mouth. Also, start setting aside money for your psychiatrist you are going to need later on down the road.....
    Quote Originally Posted by AznExtasy View Post
    LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    You can say that again.. not just on here but men in general. Guys are so damn lame, the only way they can halfway make up for it is by opening their wallets.

    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Tools

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to J.D. For This Useful Post:


  17. #11
    God/dess simone87's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2012
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    5,171
    Thanks
    7,361
    Thanked 9,469 Times in 3,228 Posts
    My Mood
    Cheeky

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    old thread!! wow..zoning out can be bad, all my regulars tell me that they hate it when girls do that and as dumb as they are they can sense robotic, zombie dancing lol! i know its hard not to sometimes, but also when i zone i get to lost in thought that i also lose track of where their hands are. stay vigilant, some of them have some very slick fingers *ick*. don't let it happen though. you will get more used to guys trying to pull that shit, you will get more callouse to it as well but never allow something you don't feel comfortable with! that's how you start mentally breaking down. everyone has their own boundaries but follow what you feel comfortable with. buddy up to the guards and tip them well to watch you if you have to

  18. #12
    Veteran Member aperfectseal's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Phoenix
    Posts
    295
    Thanks
    1,021
    Thanked 472 Times in 201 Posts

    Default Re: Ugh! Octopus Hands and Kissing!

    Wanted to add my little RANT about this topic that's been on my mind lately...
    I work day shift at my club, and when I first started a few years ago, there was always a bouncer on the floor enforcing the rules and kicking out customers who got unruly or disrespectful. Then that devolved into the bouncer is only there on Friday, Saturday and Sunday dayshifts because "we don't need one during the week." Then that turned into no bouncer at all during day shift but the manager would always be trolling the floor and keeping custies (and dirty girls) in line. We were such a clean club! Girls got fired immediately just for flashing pussy. If a guy started being really handsy, it was really easy to say "You're gonna get me in trouble!" or "The bouncer/manager is watching" etc...
    Fast forward to now and the manager is never ANYWHERE to be found. He's often not even on the premises. Girls are getting dirtier and no one is there to see it and guys are getting handsier and they know no one is watching too! They are coming to expect it since so many girls are allowing touching all over their bodies and more. The other day, I tried to tell a guy that he couldn't touch my ass and he ACTUALLY SAID "Even if *manager's name* was here, he wouldn't care, he likes me!" Like no, it's not just a club rule, it's also MY BODY AND I ASKED YOU NOT TO TOUCH ME THERE. I was sooo furious. A few months ago a girl was very clearly getting fingered in plain sight for like 3 songs and someone even went and got the manager and he saw it with his own eyes and waited for them to be done and then he sent her home for the day but let the guy keep sitting there, and just suggested to him that he tip the girl a little extra!
    I used to feel so comfortable at my club and I am now feeling pressure to "zone out" and allow custies to get away with more like Pipermonroe said up there just so I can get my money and it can be over with. *end rant*
    Thanks for letting me vent in this old thread!

  19. The Following User Says Thank You to aperfectseal For This Useful Post:


Similar Threads

  1. Octopus Dance
    By UtahMike in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 05-17-2007, 07:39 AM
  2. Octopus Dance
    By UtahMike in forum Picture Post
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 05-17-2007, 07:39 AM
  3. Kissing!
    By Yekhefah in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 01-06-2006, 11:08 AM
  4. Shaking hands spreads more germs then Kissing
    By Gabe in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 11-26-2004, 01:27 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •