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Thread: Attractive versus spender

  1. #26
    Featured Member Brandi_Lynn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Ok, I'm prob gonna get flamed for this, but here goes -not all dancers are smart or even have common sense for that matter. Hey, stereotypes exist for a reason, right..... it just helps if we do have a brain in our head. That being said -I work w/ some real fucking geniuses, but on the other hand I can definitely tell you that some others have left me scratching my head at times. Lol!

    Sorry, for your bad experience, though, OP. Better luck next time.
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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Oh... I've seen plenty in my time No flames from me

    I look for the guys that is interested in me. 50 guys in a club at one time... easy to spot 5 that are starring at me... You know, who has their eyes glued to you... They are more likely and almost guaranteed to spend since they are already interested. But I do find it natural to go to the guy that is better looking... Who wouldn't

    Quote Originally Posted by Brandi_Lynn View Post
    Ok, I'm prob gonna get flamed for this, but here goes -not all dancers are smart or even have common sense for that matter. Hey, stereotypes exist for a reason, right..... it just helps if we do have a brain in our head. That being said -I work w/ some real fucking geniuses, but on the other hand I can definitely tell you that some others have left me scratching my head at times. Lol!

    Sorry, for your bad experience, though, OP. Better luck next time.
    Last edited by LisaMintoni; 09-11-2011 at 03:02 PM.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Brandi, no flames from me. Unfortunately, I've worked with some airhead bimbos. Luckily I've worked with intelligent women as well.

    Quote Originally Posted by flyguy29 View Post
    Here is a related question, and perhaps might be relevant to an even bigger topic. Do customers.who exhibit traits of generosity, class and willingness to spend $$$$ regardless of looks, become "attractive" in the mind of the dancer? after all,if the dancer's "world" revolves around looking for "wallet, that "world could very well shape the way the dancer thinks ofmen(it was covered in other topics on this forum)
    This very thought makes guys who dated dancers more prone to jealousy (I never dated a dancer but the thought did cross my mind - if I dated one could another customer" spend his way in with a combination of $$$, charisma, and class)
    If you are asking can money make a dancer date a customer the answer is sometimes. Sometimes this doesn't matter at all. I've mentioned this countless times but last year I dated a customer who had been a friend (and who was a customer 15 years ago). He never spent that much, nor is he handsome (most would say he's ugly)but he had something that no other customers had and I'm not sure what. He became attractive to me because he was sweet and real. Unfortunately he broke my heart but I'll always love him. Anyway, for me it was never about who spent the most money on me nor what they looked like. Keep in mind though that we started hanging out after I left the club.

  5. #29
    Featured Member Brandi_Lynn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    Brandi, no flames from me. Unfortunately, I've worked with some airhead bimbos. Luckily I've worked with intelligent women as well.



    If you are asking can money make a dancer date a customer the answer is sometimes. Sometimes this doesn't matter at all. I've mentioned this countless times but last year I dated a customer who had been a friend (and who was a customer 15 years ago). He never spent that much, nor is he handsome (most would say he's ugly)but he had something that no other customers had and I'm not sure what. He became attractive to me because he was sweet and real. Unfortunately he broke my heart but I'll always love him. Anyway, for me it was never about who spent the most money on me nor what they looked like. Keep in mind though that we started hanging out after I left the club.
    Hmmm, this is a thinker....
    "You're better than no one and no one is better than you."
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    “There's never going to be a great misunderstanding of me. I think I'm a little whacked.”


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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by Brandi_Lynn View Post
    Hmmm, this is a thinker....
    Because I wanted him? I don't understand it myself and only happened once all the years I danced. Oddly, when I was seeing him and mentioned it, I had several guys ask me what made me want to date him and honestly I have no idea. What makes it even more odd is I am way out of his league in every way. In hindsight this would never have worked in the long run.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    ^My life, right there, lol. Everyone asks me how I get into the relationships and get the girls that I do, and the answer is - I HAVE NO IDEA. Maybe your friend can explain it.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    I think the chances of developing something "real" requires a reality check upfront from the douchebag that visits and the predatory dancer looking to clean him out.
    Almost Jaded - Looks like you clear the air quickly and get down to the bare flesh.. Good for you.... The only guy I noticed on this site that truly planted a flag in a "hostile" environment.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by flyguy29 View Post
    Here is a related question, and perhaps might be relevant to an even bigger topic. Do customers.who exhibit traits of generosity, class and willingness to spend $$$$ regardless of looks, become "attractive" in the mind of the dancer? after all,if the dancer's "world" revolves around looking for "wallet, that "world could very well shape the way the dancer thinks ofmen(it was covered in other topics on this forum)
    This very thought makes guys who dated dancers more prone to jealousy (I never dated a dancer but the thought did cross my mind - if I dated one could another customer" spend his way in with a combination of $$$, charisma, and class)
    Nope, still custies. But it makes the job enjoyable versus the arseholes who make it unbearable.

    So no, if you aren't hot and sexy and charismatic, doesn't matter how much money you spend or how gracious you are, its not going to happen. You WILL, however, get better quality dances, a more open, comfortable dancer, and maybe even a free dance here and there as an incentive to keep you coming back.

    So, guys, really, stop it. None of you are going to dazzle a stripper with anything other than cold, hard cash.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by Almost Jaded View Post
    flyguy29 - this is why you date the gorgeous smart dancers who never make as much money as they could because they can't stand the clients, lol.
    Not being able to stand the clients should encourage them to make MORE..so they can get out of a job that primarily deals with people they hate, and into something more satisfying.

    I wouldn't be proud of that comment at all. Then again, I'm a merciless hustler combined with a bit of an optimist, so.....

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Oh, don't get me wrong - MM & friends SHOULD all be top-earners. That statement was a very poor summery of what I meant. It's not like they're bottom feeders, lol. But they over-think, and they get caught up in BS and let shit get to their heads, and frankly - they're not money driven.

    And that's it right there - IF a guy is to have a chance at a *relationship* with a dancer that he meets ITC, he needs to meet one that isn't strictly money driven.

    Now - why they choose to work in this industry at all when they're not money-driven is something I STILL can't explain, LMAO. Put my brain in any one of their bodies, and I'd retire in 8 years or less.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by flyguy29 View Post
    if the dancer's "world" revolves around looking for "wallet, that "world could very well shape the way the dancer thinks ofmen(it was covered in other topics on this forum)
    Dude, it's not her "world" it's her job. It's not some sort of Pavlovian trance that dancers go into when they smell money, it's simply how they make a living.

    Quote Originally Posted by flyguy29 View Post
    This very thought makes guys who dated dancers more prone to jealousy (I never dated a dancer but the thought did cross my mind - if I dated one could another customer" spend his way in with a combination of $$$, charisma, and class)
    A jealous or insecure guy isn't going to last long dating dancers. There will always be guys trying to spend/charm their way into your girl's pants. If you view every guy she dances for as competition for her real-world affection you will be miserable pretty much all the time...
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    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
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    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us
    A jealous or insecure guy isn't going to last long dating dancers. There will always be guys trying to spend/charm their way into your girl's pants. If you view every guy she dances for as competition for her real-world affection you will be miserable pretty much all the time..
    ...and THAT, ladies and gentlemen, explains 90% of the relationships that girls we know are in, lol. I've said it before, and I'll say it again - and again, and again... - most men cannot handle dating a stripper. Unfortunately for the girls, neither of them KNOWS the guy can't handle it UNTIL he's dating her.

    It goes way beyond jealousy, too - that's just the first hurdle (and most guys can't jump the first one). There are so many aspects of their job, coworkers, lifestyle, etc that make most men crazy that it'd be hard to list them.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    I duno cuz I RARELY meet or even see a guy I consider attractive at the club. So it's just all work to me. I've only met a guy I consider hot once in two years. I am picky with what I consider hot. So everyone gets the same treatment. Hell even the hot guy got the same treatment.

  17. #39
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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    Quote Originally Posted by flyguy29 View Post
    Here is a related question, and perhaps might be relevant to an even bigger topic. Do customers.who exhibit traits of generosity, class and willingness to spend $$$$ regardless of looks, become "attractive" in the mind of the dancer? after all,if the dancer's "world" revolves around looking for "wallet, that "world could very well shape the way the dancer thinks ofmen(it was covered in other topics on this forum)
    This very thought makes guys who dated dancers more prone to jealousy (I never dated a dancer but the thought did cross my mind - if I dated one could another customer" spend his way in with a combination of $$$, charisma, and class)

    Since I've started back dancing, I've remembered a feeling I thought was forgotten. There are times I think people look at us dancers like we aren't actually human, sometimes I even feel like saying "you know, we have homes to go too, we don't live in this club, and we have feelings" Nothing revolves and it's not my 'world' to seek out the custies wallet. The only place I went to was work which happens to be in a strip club. I think the fact we meet so many people doing this job, exposes us to a whole lot of different behaviors/personalities and that too can shape the way we think of men. We are all different. I don't give a fuck how rich someone is, it doesn't make you attractive to me. Stripping is what I do for a job. I'm here to make money, and for me I also want everyone to be safe having a good time. I treat every customer equally who treats me with respect. I am not looking at how attractive any customer is. Coz frankly I don't care. And I don't care how much money you say you make, I REALLY don't want to meet you outside the club. And because all humans are different, I'm sure it can be the opposite for some other dancers, The ones that are like "He really genuinely likes me because he gave me this amount of $ and bought me all this blah."

    Quote Originally Posted by flyguy29 View Post
    I think the chances of developing something "real" requires a reality check upfront from the douchebag that visits and the predatory dancer looking to clean him out.
    I don't agree with the predatory dancer comment, I'm pretty sure there are dancers that make it their goal to clean a guy out. BUT we are not all predators, especially if the customer comes into our club. What do customers think when coming into a strip club? Hell actually I have a question, why do custies ask for our damn numbers, even after a dance? seriously. It really gets on my nerves.

    Quote Originally Posted by Almost Jaded View Post
    And that's it right there - IF a guy is to have a chance at a *relationship* with a dancer that he meets ITC, he needs to meet one that isn't strictly money driven. Now - why they choose to work in this industry at all when they're not money-driven is something I STILL can't explain, LMAO. Put my brain in any one of their bodies, and I'd retire in 8 years or less.
    I've known a few dancers who were in fantastic relationships, actually married, some still are 14 years later. Those girls were EXTREMELY money motivated, a lot were the top earners in the club. They were just professionals doing their job, probably very secure in who they were and happy to go back home to who they were with, so were less effected by the mind games custies try to play.

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dude, it's not her "world" it's her job. It's not some sort of Pavlovian trance that dancers go into when they smell money, it's simply how they make a living.
    I love this. I couldn't have said that better.

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    A jealous or insecure guy isn't going to last long dating dancers. There will always be guys trying to spend/charm their way into your girl's pants. If you view every guy she dances for as competition for her real-world affection you will be miserable pretty much all the time...
    And probably why a lot of us are just lonely.
    I'm here to make money. NOT make friends, if I make a friend then it's a bonus.

    I'd rather be absolutely ridiculous that absolutely boring

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    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dude, it's not her "world" it's her job. It's not some sort of Pavlovian trance that dancers go into when they smell money, it's simply how they make a living.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    I didn't say it couldn't be done Kelly - obviously, 'cuz I'm in a great relationship with a dancer (actually, 2), lol. But the majority of strippers we know go through relationship after relationship - and many that had potential die because the guy ends up not being able to handle her profession. This is all assuming that the dancer in question is good and ready for a solid relationship, of course... Anyway, this pattern persists until either the girl finds a guy who is secure and understanding and doesn't care about her work - few and far between - or until she finally quits dancing either of her own free will or under pressure from a boyfriend. That is most of the ones we see.

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    Default Re: Attractive versus spender

    If that was me you can bet my ass would have been fawning over you all night because as I have said many times before I am all business, no games, no bs!

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