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Thread: Negativity...

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    Veteran Member Discuntent's Avatar
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    Default Negativity...

    "Shit happens", etc. etc., but how do you deal with it? I generally consider myself a positive person, but just as one bad thing happens, it seems, everything else goes to shit. Negativity attracts negativity. It takes me a while before I can get back to being myself again - but it's never long before my thoughts change that for me.


    PS Just to note - negativity attracting negativity, etc.: as I was typing this on my iPhone, i had to pause to deal with some freak at the gym who has been bothering me for the past few weeks. Hjfkghks.

    PPS I am PMSing, but in any event it's so easy for me to get down on myself and start thinking negative thoughts. I don't want this post to sound like I'm being self-indulgent and feeling sorry for myself, I just hate feeling this way and need to kick it. I'm super shy in the first place and honestly just need to grow some balls...

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    Featured Member FiendishGyrator's Avatar
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    Default Re: Negativity...

    Can you do one of the following:
    1. focus on all the stuff you've done right and how awesome you are and really pump yourself up?
    2. focus on how bad so many other people have it-- not just generally, but pick up a newspaper and see how shitty one person's particular life is.
    3. Focus on the fact that you don't HAVE to be happy all the time. There's nothing wrong if you're feeling bad or bitchy or down. Take the stress off yourself! Everyday you're likely going to be happy a dozen times, and irritated or sad at least as many times.
    and if that fails
    4. watch your favorite comedy or read your favorite happy genre of book or magazine-- you know this is just a temporary feeling so why rail against it when distraction will work so much better?

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    Default Re: Negativity...

    i can relate, esp since rite now im a prisoner of sorts and have no real control over any of the fuckups currently going on at my property (being there to mitigate weather damage, etc). ive been negative alot too lately

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    Veteran Member kellyallstar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Negativity...

    Generally, I just take a break from the world to just think things over to myself without anyone else's opinion, just my own thoughts. One of the worse things for me is to bring anyone down with me when shit isn't going right in my life. Normally after that something brings me back and I'm all good, could take just a phone call from a friend.

    If it's at work, I am really good at tuning out when girls talk shit. And if I can't tune it out, I get the hell outta the changing room, or walk away, I DON'T wanna hear it.
    I'm here to make money. NOT make friends, if I make a friend then it's a bonus.

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    Default Re: Negativity...

    I don't know if inspirational quotes help you, but anytime I'm online and see something that I find as motivating or uplifting, I save it in a folder to look at in the times I need it.

    I also don't spend too much time talking to people who are always complaining or in a bad attitude. I spend time by myself and during that time I am usually able to pull myself out of a funk. When it comes down to it, I remind myself my time on this earth is pretty limited- do I really want to be in a pissy mood all the time?

    Despite the things that aren't how I want them, I am alive, relatively healthy, and I have some options and some power to change things for the better. That is SO much more than many people have at their disposal.
    Women of color:
    Shake your ass and preserve your heritage.
    Bang those fucking drums.
    Do it for the present and future generations.
    Have fun and stick it to the man at the same time.
    (bad-dominicana)

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    Default Re: Negativity...

    Thanks for the good advice on this thread. I can relate to all. I am currently having a bad time as well and I hope it will change to good times soon. I'm monitoring my thoughts now.

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    Featured Member aussiebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Negativity...

    I focus on myself. Eat well, exercise hard everyday, keep the house clean, do my nails etc. I make myself feel good as it is one aspect I can control and feel positive about.

    Kind of makes me feel better when everything else is going to shit.
    Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

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    Default Re: Negativity...

    First, I try to focus on my breathing. It helps clear my mind "innnn, outttt"

    Then, whatever the situation, I really try to look on the bright side. It could be something small or silly, but there is one - lesson learned, dodged a bullet, etc.

    But if I'm mad, then I do myself a favor and just let it out. Scream into a pillow, punch a pillow, kick a gnome (the sims ). Then after that, I can focus on feeling better.

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