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Thread: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

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    Default Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    So I worked last night. I got up and went into my daughter's room when I woke up (she is 18 months btw) as I usually do so that she doesn't cry. I fed her and changed her and got her her sippy cup and we went back into her room. She was playing and I was in and out of sleep. I heard my dad's gf wake up and she was in the kitchen, a while later my daughter goes out to the kitchen (which I didn't see a problem with) and was probably mooching off whatever she was having for bfast (my daughter is a piglet). I was awake but sleepy and was laying on the rug in my daughters room. I heard my dad's gf say 'go with mami' and as I looked up it appeared she'd just finished pushing my baby onto the floor and rushing away out of sight and out the front door.

    In addition, I heard and recognized her brother's voice. He comes every few weeks to shop for clothes here in Miami and sells it in Ecuador. My dad and his gf are leaving to Mexico for about a week this week, and I thought it was going to be just me and my baby at home. No one bothered to tell me that my dad's girlfriend's brother was going to be coming to stay or that I'd be home alone with him for over a week. I'm very much annoyed by this, but I'm wondering if I'm over reacting.

    I called my sister already and she told me the right thing to have done was to spoke up right away as soon as I saw what I did... but that at this point it wouldn't do much good especially considering she is leaving to Mexico for a week.

    I just don't know if I can keep my mouth shut.

    Lastly, I'm clearing out my locker at the club and staying home with my daughter. My dad's girlfriend didn't really watch her for me, but she was at home with her during the night when I worked (my daughter sleeps from 7:30 to 7:30). So, I don't even feel comfortable with that anymore.
    I might go back to work in November, we will see. Her daycare provides overnight care as well so I will look into that.

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    Senior Member Candy Girl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Call this bitch out. Let errybody know what you saw. You're not wrong. You are shocked as anyone would be. Glad it wasn't something worse. I don't co-sign non-blood relatives alone with children. Lord knows the blood relatives are enough of a risk.

    Sorry to say but different cultures have different values.

    Imagine this bird laying hands on Black woman's child in her home. I don't think so.
    Smoke good, eat good. Drink and f*** good. Comin' to the club, stuntin' how you should. My s*** on fire I don't need no gasolina. I'm comin through the block with the new two seater. Cash rules everything around me -- C.R.E.A.M. -- get the money! Dollar dollar bill, y'all!!! FREEZE!!! You know who it is!!! It's me *****es!!! Showtime!!! -Swizz Beats

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Live in someone elses home, live by their rules.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    I would at least ask her about it, wtf. & can you get her of there, at least temporarily? What if she did push her, & will possibly escalate to something worse?


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Candy Girl View Post
    Call this bitch out. Let errybody know what you saw. You're not wrong. You are shocked as anyone would be. Glad it wasn't something worse. I don't co-sign non-blood relatives alone with children. Lord knows the blood relatives are enough of a risk.



    Sorry to say but different cultures have different values.



    Imagine this bird laying hands on Black woman's child in her home. I don't think so.



    I'm confused.. Is it okay to push down white children? Or asian ones? Hispanic?

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    Angry Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by slowpoke View Post
    Live in someone elses home, live by their rules.
    Right, however it does not justify pushing a child. & it doesn't matter what race she is..


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Candy Girl View Post
    Call this bitch out. Let errybody know what you saw. You're not wrong. You are shocked as anyone would be. Glad it wasn't something worse. I don't co-sign non-blood relatives alone with children. Lord knows the blood relatives are enough of a risk.

    Sorry to say but different cultures have different values.

    Imagine this bird laying hands on Black woman's child in her home. I don't think so.

    I am not 100% sure what you're saying, please clarify. Are you saying that this happened because of my family's ethnicity or that it is ok in my culture? Are you saying a Black mom wouldn't ever have this happen to her child because Black moms are better?

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Candy Girl View Post
    Call this bitch out. Let errybody know what you saw. You're not wrong. You are shocked as anyone would be. Glad it wasn't something worse. I don't co-sign non-blood relatives alone with children. Lord knows the blood relatives are enough of a risk.

    Sorry to say but different cultures have different values.

    Imagine this bird laying hands on Black woman's child in her home. I don't think so.
    Yeah...I'm confused, too.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    I think she's saying it wouldn't happen to her, or in a certain culture, but really people differ across the board..
    The most important thing is to get your baby out of there


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Things like that happens in every race and every culture, and anyone who thinks that someone of their race "would never do that" is ignorant. Bad people exist and they come in all colors and from all cultures.

    If you want to say something, you should. You don't need to be rude or hostile... something like "I saw what looked like you pushing my daughter down the other day and I wanted you to know that I'm not okay with that." is fine. You don't need to accuse her or approach her agressively. Just tell her what you thought you saw, that if that's what happened - it's not okay, and that it is not something that should ever happen again in the future.

    It was really inconsiderate of them not to warn you that he was coming/that you were going to be left alone with him for over a week. You should likely speak to them about that also, even though if it's a possible situation you may frequently encounter in the future you may want to consider finding a place of your own. (Although I don't know your situation or if that's even possible.)
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Ladies, sorry to start confusion.

    I was making 3 separate points to support the OP.

    1. the father's girlfriend has a different level of bond to the OP's child because she's not blood-related. And, true talk, some people resent kids that aren't family. Especially apparent in restaurants, on planes and at the movies.

    2. whether someone is a different ethnicity, race, religion or from another country - child-rearing attitudes are likely to be different. Some cultures kiss children on the lips, some let the little ones sleep in their bed, some bathe with the babies, some mutilate genitals, some starve kids when they're sick, some don't believe in giving kids chemical medicines, some put babies in pools to make them swim, some pierce earlobes, some put little boys in dresses, some give little ones watered down brandy to sleep, and some use corporal punishment. The girlfriend may not mean harm -- she might just be from a different culture. She might think she was correcting the baby but running away says otherwise.

    3. As a Black woman, in my gut, and in my experience with other Black women, touching a Black woman's child can inspire... shall we say swift action. And that action might go upside the perpetrator's head. Sorry but that's my sistagirl perspective on what might happen after a similar incident in a Black woman's home. The abuse of a child is not better or worse with regard to race. And I'm not saying violence is the answer but I know my Mama always says she'd have gone to jail if anyone had laid a hand on me. And I believe her. Just adding that slightly different if imperfect ethnic perspective that says all is justified in defense of your child.

    I hope that helps make clear what I was trying to say.
    Smoke good, eat good. Drink and f*** good. Comin' to the club, stuntin' how you should. My s*** on fire I don't need no gasolina. I'm comin through the block with the new two seater. Cash rules everything around me -- C.R.E.A.M. -- get the money! Dollar dollar bill, y'all!!! FREEZE!!! You know who it is!!! It's me *****es!!! Showtime!!! -Swizz Beats

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Ya know what? My mom used to beat my ass, all the time. But God forbid someone else touched me, or even thought about it, because then she would beat their ass, too. Just for looking like they thought about it. And guess what? She wasn't even black.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    That's great. But what happened with the lady who pushed your baby? Have you had a talk with her or your family about it?
    Smoke good, eat good. Drink and f*** good. Comin' to the club, stuntin' how you should. My s*** on fire I don't need no gasolina. I'm comin through the block with the new two seater. Cash rules everything around me -- C.R.E.A.M. -- get the money! Dollar dollar bill, y'all!!! FREEZE!!! You know who it is!!! It's me *****es!!! Showtime!!! -Swizz Beats

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    What may appear isnt always what it seems!!!

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Candy Girl View Post
    3. As a Black woman, in my gut, and in my experience with other Black women, touching a Black woman's child can inspire... shall we say swift action. And that action might go upside the perpetrator's head. Sorry but that's my sistagirl perspective on what might happen after a similar incident in a Black woman's home.
    Wow, you must have a really narrow-minded view of the world. Maybe you don't have much life experience outside of your own race? Do you really think that black women react differently (or "better"?) if someone puts hands on their child? Your "sistagirl" perspective...really? Holy shit I thought this was 2011? Your comments seem just as ass-backwards as those of other ethnicities...

    To the OP:

    I have experience with 4 kids. Don't over-react. TALK to your dad's GF and find out what happened. 18-month olds tend to "fall down" at the slightest push (or even just a hand blocking their forward momentum) especially when they aren't getting what they want (and they cry). From what you describe, it sounds like perhaps your daughter was trying hard to follow her out the door and she was saying "No, go to Mami" and keeping her from going out the door while trying to get out the door herself/close the door (and your daughter "fell down" - perhaps in frustration?). It sounds like she averted a temper tantrum from your daughter (they all do it at that age + separation anxiety) by being firm, saying "No" and making sure she stayed put (safely inside the door).

    I could be wrong, but the way you described it doesn't sound like abuse to me. 18month olds can be challenging to deal with, especially because they have a hard time understanding "No"/you can't come with me. 18mo olds (up to 3yrs) have an especially hard time when people are leaving the home/walking out the door.

    I'd recommend observing future interactions, but don't let this one thing make you over-react just yet.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    I wasn't posting about my Black perspective because I think it's better. I don't. Violence is a troubling dynamic in the Black community. I am half. I could have written what a Tiger Mom might do. Or a chola. But I don't know as much about that personally.

    It's really interesting how much ladies have reacted to my mentioning of race -- specifically the Black race.

    But in the end this thread is about Lokikola defending her baby. And I wanna support her it that.
    Smoke good, eat good. Drink and f*** good. Comin' to the club, stuntin' how you should. My s*** on fire I don't need no gasolina. I'm comin through the block with the new two seater. Cash rules everything around me -- C.R.E.A.M. -- get the money! Dollar dollar bill, y'all!!! FREEZE!!! You know who it is!!! It's me *****es!!! Showtime!!! -Swizz Beats

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Candy Girl View Post
    It's really interesting how much ladies have reacted to my mentioning of race -- specifically the Black race.
    Nobody here was upset about you bringing up the "black" perspective. It just wasn't necessary to bring up race at all, and it seems like you are totally determined to do that in every post. So don't go implying that we're racist or something, because you are waaaay off the mark with that.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Thanks for letting me know I was being insensitive.
    Smoke good, eat good. Drink and f*** good. Comin' to the club, stuntin' how you should. My s*** on fire I don't need no gasolina. I'm comin through the block with the new two seater. Cash rules everything around me -- C.R.E.A.M. -- get the money! Dollar dollar bill, y'all!!! FREEZE!!! You know who it is!!! It's me *****es!!! Showtime!!! -Swizz Beats

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    I don't think it's a race thing at all, I think its a parent thing. If someone hurt my child in any way I'm sure my instincts would kick in. I don't have kids, but awhile back someone tried to hurt my cat and I was there protecting him. I'm sure I'd be even worse with my kids.

    I think you need to talk to her and if she's dangerous you either need to move out or make sure she's not around your kid.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    This turned into a race preach thread instead of answering the question.

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Candy Girl View Post
    Ladies, sorry to start confusion.

    I was making 3 separate points to support the OP.

    1. the father's girlfriend has a different level of bond to the OP's child because she's not blood-related. And, true talk, some people resent kids that aren't family. Especially apparent in restaurants, on planes and at the movies.

    2. whether someone is a different ethnicity, race, religion or from another country - child-rearing attitudes are likely to be different. Some cultures kiss children on the lips, some let the little ones sleep in their bed, some bathe with the babies, some mutilate genitals, some starve kids when they're sick, some don't believe in giving kids chemical medicines, some put babies in pools to make them swim, some pierce earlobes, some put little boys in dresses, some give little ones watered down brandy to sleep, and some use corporal punishment. The girlfriend may not mean harm -- she might just be from a different culture. She might think she was correcting the baby but running away says otherwise.

    3. As a Black woman, in my gut, and in my experience with other Black women, touching a Black woman's child can inspire... shall we say swift action. And that action might go upside the perpetrator's head. Sorry but that's my sistagirl perspective on what might happen after a similar incident in a Black woman's home. The abuse of a child is not better or worse with regard to race. And I'm not saying violence is the answer but I know my Mama always says she'd have gone to jail if anyone had laid a hand on me. And I believe her. Just adding that slightly different if imperfect ethnic perspective that says all is justified in defense of your child.

    I hope that helps make clear what I was trying to say.

    I got your point.
    Okay life, you wanna test me some more? BRING IT ON 'cause i can take whatever ya got coming!!!!

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Quote Originally Posted by Obenta View Post
    Wow, you must have a really narrow-minded view of the world. Maybe you don't have much life experience outside of your own race? Do you really think that black women react differently (or "better"?) if someone puts hands on their child? Your "sistagirl" perspective...really? Holy shit I thought this was 2011? Your comments seem just as ass-backwards as those of other ethnicities...
    I found Candy Girl while surfing the internet.

    http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/video...t9o9l45IrJC34z

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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    I don't get it.

    But lemme tell you how hot Dr. Drew is in person. Plus he makes great TV shows as this clip attests.

    I do wonder about the orig. point of this thread -- that is, how's the situation with whoever pushed your baby on the ground.

    Thanks for the love & attention!
    Smoke good, eat good. Drink and f*** good. Comin' to the club, stuntin' how you should. My s*** on fire I don't need no gasolina. I'm comin through the block with the new two seater. Cash rules everything around me -- C.R.E.A.M. -- get the money! Dollar dollar bill, y'all!!! FREEZE!!! You know who it is!!! It's me *****es!!! Showtime!!! -Swizz Beats

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    Veteran Member Aslinn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did she just push my baby onto the ground?

    Wtf are they putting on TV now a'days? That's the same show Courtney Stoddern was on!

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