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Thread: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

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    Sad HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    WARNING NOTE: Beware of attractive classy good looking young SDs..they are mostly sleazy!! Girls.. I feel so stupid so foolish, I'm sobbing now. I have an SD for 5 months already and NO SEX. He's very good looking & young. HOT. I thought I was getting it all together all this time. I thought I was getting better in my hustle...apparently I'm wrong. 4 days ago he phoned me after his trip and I was on my vanilla job. I had some dinner meetings with colleagues so I can only meet him around 10 evening. I was so exhausted with work and I'm short on cash so I agree to meet him. I told him I'm not so well, I just came down with slight flu but already recuperating. He said " It's okay darling, I miss you much I want to see you we just talk, order room service and watch some TV spend time together" He is booking a suite in one of the best hotels in my city. Such a beautiful place with beautiful view of the city lights.. I said "I need my allowance also" He said, "It's already prepared as usual just come" When I met him at the lobby, he looks 10 time more handsome and I was infatuated ( I feel like being in a trance because...I remember my ex boyfriend....I miss being romantic. And SD is very romantic He told me he's made a decision to support me long term and that he will help me set up my future etc. Many good plans. I thought that he's a good man and he's been with me for 5 months, spending a lot on me, gifts & generous cash so..I think he's decent. Perhaps I'm lucky.

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    Duh Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    CONTINUE

    Suddenly the whole ambience, the beautiful room, the flowers, the romantic dinner...the conversation..the fantastic view..made me drop my guards and found myself in his arms and slept with him, I TOTALLY REGRET IT!!!!!!!!! ( -----------we use condoms-------
    Then in the morning he said "Kris, please write down your account number because I don't have cash with me right now. I will deposit 5k for you today"
    Then he drove me to a cafe not far from my house, because I never give him my address.

    He called me to make sure I'm home. And that was the last time I heard from him. It's been 4 days already, no deposit, no call, no news.
    My friend said that I was FOOLISH for putting my guards down. OMG I am still crying now. He already got what he wanted. There's no guarantee that he'll keep his words.

    If I could turn back time, I wouldn't have slept with him. I would just sleep in the other room since it's a two bedroom suite.
    I really need support, I know I made a mistake. I really really regret. I wish I can rewind time and make different decisions.
    I thought I was special to him, and I looked good, took care of my body keeping myself slim toned and lean..I thought I got him HOOKED with my looks all this time and he wouldn't leave me..because guys are about looks right?? They like a trophy girl and I am one.

    This experience is like such a slap on my face
    I need some hugs and advice & kind words... I feel so down and depressed now. Bills are due and .. *crying*

    My friend said I have to move on fast. Shrug it off, learn my lesson and move on. I feel so awful I feel cheated and tricked and stupid.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    SORRY my computer is weird..if I post all it will end up a wall of text.

    I hope that he's keeping his words.
    What to do if he doesn't keep his words?? I feel so punked.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    I'm sorry, girl. It was a moment of weakness. We all have them. Don't beat yourself up over it. If he calls give him ONE opportunity to pay you the $5K. If he doesn't come up with it within twenty-four hours, do not contact him again.

    You know the saying: "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on ME."

    Lesson learned. There's more where that came from.
    "SS=stripper shit, in the same spectrum as CS=customer shit, which is within the spectrum of SaS=sales shit, which is all contained in the universe of BS=bullshit." -- Jay Zeno (mod)

    "Show me a hot chick and I'll show you someone who's tired of fucking her."






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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    VivianBear -- thanks for dropping by. Please hug me i need to get myself together fast. I still shudder when I think about my mistake. I truly regret it.
    I have a feeling that he will contact me again. Oh I'm crying again now I feel so stupid.

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    Featured Member vivianbear's Avatar
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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Feeling stupid is normal. But seriously, it was just casual sex. Get yourself together and start thinking of ways you're going to rebound any potential he may try to use it as a way to get laid on the regular. Look at it as an opportunity! Now you can tell him: "Oh nooes! I'm so emotionally vulnerable right now. What was I thinking?! We can never do that again. I know you weren't trying to take advantage of my position. Let's continue on the way we were so I can get my head together. I'm in no position to be with anyone, right now."

    Just treat it like a freak accident! It was no one's fault but it's not something that can ever continue. He made the commitment to be a benefactor to you BEFORE sex ever entered I to the equation. He can't go back on that but if he does, it's over altogether. Stay strong with that point. You didn't enter into the agreement to become his lover/dish on the side/booty call. He can continue on with the original terms or it will have to end.

    You'll be fine!! Besides, my favorite author always said: "It's better to regret the things you HAVE done, rather than regret the things you haven't done". He was hot. You took him for a spin. Now, back to work.

    **hugs**
    "SS=stripper shit, in the same spectrum as CS=customer shit, which is within the spectrum of SaS=sales shit, which is all contained in the universe of BS=bullshit." -- Jay Zeno (mod)

    "Show me a hot chick and I'll show you someone who's tired of fucking her."






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    Dizzy Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Quote Originally Posted by vivianbear View Post
    You'll be fine!! Besides, my favorite author always said: "It's better to regret the things you HAVE done, rather than regret the things you haven't done". He was hot. You took him for a spin. Now, back to work.

    **hugs**
    Thank you so much The quote made me smile.I feel a bit better now. *hugs* Thanks Vivian..it really means a lot to me. I need some time to get my head together and move on.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Vivianbear--Thanks so much for ur encouragement.
    I have tried calling him 3 times today, no answer. Texted 2 times, no reply. And left 2 messages on messenger (IM) also no response.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    I sorry but I'm going to call it a loss.. I don't know what others grew up with as sugar daddies but sex is the end of the money. I just say calm down, take a deep breath, and say you will never make the mistake again before you go to the hunting ground again.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Deleted
    Last edited by sweet_baby; 02-24-2012 at 09:05 AM.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Not sure if it was good idea to give him your bank account number??? Keep close eye on it or close it down if you dont get your money.
    Last edited by Raider; 09-16-2011 at 10:26 AM. Reason: re-phrase....

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    ^^ I wouldn't be too worried about the bank account if all you gave him was your account number. People use other people's account numbers all the time to deposit money - it's what happens when you get direct deposit for a paycheck. He shouldn't be able to withdraw anything. But do be a little extra cautious - I have a friend who had a lot of money stolen from her after giving the guy too much info, when he claimed he was going to deposit money. If he contacts you again asking for more information so he can "make the deposit" don't give it to him, because that's how he'll get your money.

    I would really just chalk the rest of this up to a loss and lesson learned. I'm sorry you got blindsided, but guys are like this sometimes. They will say anything to get you into bed. I used to be friends with a guy who was so sweet to me one night when I was upset and was just a regular Casanova, giving me support and touching me gently, and telling me he'd never just leave me alone to deal with it all on my own. We slept together that night and, despite the fact that he used to text me every day, I didn't hear from him again.... there are a lot of guys whose end goal is sex and they will do anything to get it. It sucks to get duped that way, but now you know. Go find a different SD and don't make that mistake again. Live and learn...

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    You sound like one of the PL's in the customer section, "she told me she liked me untill I gave her my wallet".lol Its a game played, play it better or get out.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Damn girl. You fucked up. Not going to rake you over the coals, because I think you know it too.

    All you can do is move on. There's no real way to get your 5K allowance, and now that he's managed to get you in bed and not contact you for the last 5 days - safe to say it's over.

    The good news is you're still in good shape and you already know how the game is played. Next SD you manage to wrangle, you'll be wiser and smarter and won't make the same mistake again.

    No regrets. It's a learning process. If you want another SD it's time to put yourself out there and find one. I'm sorry you feel so used and sad, I would too - but you can't let those feelings overwhelm you.

    Keep your chin up and carry on.



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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Don't text or call him anymore, let him contact you. If he doesn't contact you, then let it go and chalk it up to a lesson learned. Don't play his game.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Damn girl I'm so sorry this happened to you. Please do some more research before you seek another sugar daddy. I can tell from your post that you've been misinformed about the SD/SB world. And don't beat yourself up about it. He's probably really good at this.
    Bitch? Actually I'm an evil cunt. Slut? Try dirty little whore. Either way, you have to pay for it.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    Has he ever given you any money? Maybe you didn't do it right or pissed him off somehow. Too clingy after you boned? Move on. It will be okay. Put out next time and get your money up front.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    You had a wonderful night with someone you obviously found very attractive, i'm not exactly sure why you are so upset about this.
    "Well done. Here are the test results: You are a horrible person. I'm serious, that's what it says: 'A horrible person.' We weren't even testing for that."

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    So wait $35,000 -$5,000= $30,000 right+ gifts and spoiling? If that's the case one night of sex isn't too bad. Just think of the guys that gave you a $10.00 meal and slept with you over and over and over again. Plus he was hot too!

    The bottom line here is that he contacted you because he wanted out. He just wanted to bend you over first. A hottie douchebag is still a douchebag. Again I applaud you making him wait for 5 months. Hell many sb's sleep with their sd's in 3 days with $0.00 or at most $300.00 after some fat guy rolls off of them. Not to mention some are doing it for $100 with no condoms.

    He probably talked to some SD John type and he told him to dump you because you weren't putting out. The guy most likely instructed him to hit it and quit it.

    Just see it as with many SD's they are out for variety and change and just like we women love a new pair of expensive shoes, so do they when it comes to women.

    I say in the future , keep sugar dating. A pair and a spare. That way when one wants to drop off the map, there's more land to visit.

    Sorry this happened. I think he was trying to go for cruel shock value. Plus some of these guys are just down right nasty.Be glad that he left because YOU ARE STILL HOT! So another SD will be waiting to meet you.

    There's are some possibilities why he did this:

    1.He felt that you were getting attached. Perhaps you were too available for him and even though he enjoyed it, he felt he had a responsibility to you that he didn't want. Another issue is that he may have grown an attachment to you. Again not something that he probably would admit or wanted. So he needed to get it and get out. Really childish behavior.

    2. He went bankrupt. Knowing that if he told you would disappear. So he knew you would never sleep with him ever. If he acts like things are just fine and dandy and then sleeps with you. You'll be none the wiser until of course $0.00 is deposited in your account.

    3. If he's a hot SD and you're a hot SB then the attraction must have been intense. 5 months is a long time for most men to not want some intimacy. However he could have been the respectful type or..... He was bi or gay and needed someone to "pretend" he was straight with. If he was loving your manolo's more then you did then you may have met a closet case. Now that the charade is over, he can now come out and get himself a sugarbaby(male).

    4. His wife found out and he needs to disappear. Didn't want to make any large cash withdrawals.

    Remember you're hot and there is more sugar to taste in that bowl. So dust these old sprinkles off. You'll find someone better.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    That is the thing about SD's. They always come to an abrupt ending. They never call ahead and say "I am going to be dumping you soon, so make sure you have your own finances in order." Nope. No courtesy call. Just *poof* gone. No more money.

    You'll never get an explanation of what happened, don't expect one. Maybe he ran out of money, maybe his wife caught on, maybe he found a new SB. Who knows. Lesson learned. Never count on SD money as your sole source of income and be very very wary of getting emotionally attached. SD/SB relationships are not love relationships. You are side meat, entertainment, a temporary muse. Sometimes it can become more but never assume. Sorry Chalk it up to lesson learned and you'll be better at the game next time around.

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    Default Re: HELP! I think my SD is CHEATING me!!*crying*

    What an asshole. Sorry but if you say you are going to do something... do it. He shouldn't have lied. But at least he was hot and you didn't sleep with some disgusting freak... imagine how bad you'd feel then. If he ever contacts you I would only send back "Still waiting for my payment douchebag" then never ever reply to anything again.

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