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Thread: Fixed Term Marriage?

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    Default Fixed Term Marriage?

    In Mexico City you don't have to be stuck in a marriage that drags on longer than you like. You can set the length of the license. No more expensive divorce fees. Me likey!!

    (snip)

    ‘Til death do us part … for two years? Mexico City lawmakers are proposing legislation that would allow newlyweds to apply for temporary marriage licenses, instead of making the plunge into wedded life a lifetime commitment.
    The legislation’s proponents argue that the hassle of divorce could be avoided by making these licenses an option, according to Reuters. The change to civil code was proposed this week and would allow couples to decide the length of the commitment, with two years as the minimum.
    If couples are still enjoying wedded bliss when the contract ends, then they would be able to renew the license. And if they’re unhappy, the contract expires and they are both free without going through a divorce.
    “The proposal is, when the two-year period is up, if the relationship is not stable or harmonious, the contract simply ends,” Leonoel Luna, the Mexico City assemblyman who co-authored the bill, told Reuters. “You wouldn’t have to go through the torturous process of divorce.”

    (snip) http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headline...iage-licenses/
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    i feel like if you're with someone and can only commit to them for two years, they aren't the person for you anyway. but everyone do what they want.

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    Veteran Member The Six's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Marriage is pretty much just a business move at this point, anyway. It's more legal than love. Might as well just expose it as a contract between two partners and call it what it is.

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    Senior Member TigerToes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    they've had these in islam for ages, i don't believe this is a marriage though!

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikah_mut%E2%80%98ah

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    I think that is a great idea.

    If they offered that in the US I would not be opposed to trying it. People are too idealistic in their approach to marriage. They think everything has to be just like Disney movies, but that's not reality. If you are married, legally, and living together for two years having the option to renew your marriage license or allow it to expire is a great option. Two years is enough time to decide if you can stick around longer, it's like baby steps.

    There is nothing wrong with saying "I am 25-years-old, I want to marry you, but let's ease into this because we are still young". Testing out a marriage that is due to last another 60 years for just two years is a great option.

    I wonder what your marital status would be if you let your marriage license expire? Would it be expired? lol.
    If you are willing to do for one year what other's won't, you can spend a lifetime doing what other's cant.


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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    I can see the practical benefits of it, but to me it completely kills the romance. Why get married at all?

    (which personally I probably will never marry again but somehow I can't totally give up the antiquated idea of "romance" even though in the back of my mind I don't really see it ever happening in my life again).


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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Even after those two years even if it's not technically a divorce all the same exact problems of a divorce remain.
    "Well done. Here are the test results: You are a horrible person. I'm serious, that's what it says: 'A horrible person.' We weren't even testing for that."

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by laurielegs View Post
    I can see the practical benefits of it, but to me it completely kills the romance. Why get married at all?

    (which personally I probably will never marry again but somehow I can't totally give up the antiquated idea of "romance" even though in the back of my mind I don't really see it ever happening in my life again).
    Au contraire! It will make the couple keep the passion and wooing alive.

    Quote Originally Posted by TigerToes View Post
    they've had these in islam for ages, i don't believe this is a marriage though!

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikah_mut%E2%80%98ah
    I never knew that! I like that. Marriage was always a contract but why make it permanent when people can change so much.
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    I'm with someone that I think I'll be with forever, but I do think that marriage can kill relationships. They take work, and I can see how doing marriage until death do us part makes it seem like there's less work to be done. I like the idea of a two year marriage. For one thing, we can share benefits, we're able to see each other in the hospital if something happens, and legally the other can make decisions for us if something happens that way too.

    I'm leery of marriage, but like The Six says- it's really more of a business move at this point to make sure we're legally covered.

    I wonder how this works with debt though because isn't it in the United States that, if married, you are responsible for the other person's debt?
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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    It seems more than a little odd a municipality could enact legislation affecting marriage.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by The Six View Post
    Marriage is pretty much just a business move at this point, anyway. It's more legal than love. Might as well just expose it as a contract between two partners and call it what it is.
    Quite true! Arranged marriages when compared to love marriages have seemingly always had a much higher success rate anyways, so approaching love marriages from the business perspective seems like a step in the right direction--IMHO.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by MyButter View Post
    Quite true! Arranged marriages when compared to love marriages have seemingly always had a much higher success rate anyways, so approaching love marriages from the business perspective seems like a step in the right direction--IMHO.
    Typically because in an arranged marriage societal pressures prevent them from divorcing.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by jester214 View Post
    Typically because in an arranged marriage societal pressures prevent them from divorcing.
    Exactly, someone who is forced to marry isn't going to have the freedom to get a divorce either.
    "Well done. Here are the test results: You are a horrible person. I'm serious, that's what it says: 'A horrible person.' We weren't even testing for that."

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    There is nothing wrong with saying "I am 25-years-old, I want to marry you, but let's ease into this because we are still young".
    In theory, perhaps ! In the 'real world', and in a country with all sorts of legal ramifications re marriage, a whole set of 'unintended consequences' would arise.

    If one party wants to renew the temporary marriage but the other party does not, what are the ramifications re community property / cash value of the other party's retirement benefits etc. ? In America this would require that every couple about to marry develop a detailed pre-nup, expose themselves to future financial risk, or require that the legal advantages of marriage versus two people cohabiting would have to be scrapped.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    it does make some sense, but honestly i would be offended if the person i was with wanted one of these. and most of the people i know would feel the same.

    also, i didn't see...is there a fee for license renewal? because this sounds like a way to make more money.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    If a municipality wants more money it can just raise the water bills.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by jester214 View Post
    Typically because in an arranged marriage societal pressures prevent them from divorcing.
    Well exactly. There is so much business behind an arranged marriage that it just isn't worth getting divorced. I was just pointing out that IMHO marriages spawning out of an emotion don't seem to have a high success rate. I thought that this idea was exciting because it is a great way of introducing a safetynet into an emotional arrangemnent=)

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    This sounds like someone wanting to hold a woman down and then drop her when a better opportunity arises.

    To me I may still be a hopeless romantic, but If a man said let's do a 2 year marriage I would be dropping him. What ever happened to "til death do us part". I'm thinking that many people these days are not even taking marriage serious. I wouldn't want to marry someone that wanted a 2 year term. I mean what is this a lowered jail sentence? lol If someone feels like their emotions are just not solid enough to last a 2year mark, then it would best to drop them now. I mean do people really want to have 22-42+ex husbands/wives?


    Well I'm pretty sure the local jeweler will enjoy the boom in business.

    The only way I would feel this would be a great choice would be for someone that had a terminal illness. Then again generally anyone truly in love with someone that has died from cancer etc would want to keep the memory of that person for many years to come. Marrying someone new isn't generally on the mind of someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by cherryblossomsinspring View Post

    To me I may still be a hopeless romantic, but If a man said let's do a 2 year marriage I would be dropping him. What ever happened to "til death do us part". I'm thinking that many people these days are not even taking marriage serious. I wouldn't want to marry someone that wanted a 2 year term. I mean what is this a lowered jail sentence? lol If someone feels like their emotions are just not solid enough to last a 2year mark, then it would best to drop them now.

    Agreed. Yes, people can change drastically over time and/or fall out of love, etc etc, but that's why people should wait and spend awhile with someone before committing to marry them. If someone is worried they won't be able to last another 2 years with me, then I would rather put off marriage until we've been together longer and have a better feeling for it being long-haul. I know it's realistic to think that maybe something could happen and perhaps protect yourself with a pre-nup if you would have a lot to lose. But from, I guess what some would consider a "romantic" POV, if you feel like you need a "trial-run" with me beyond the time dating to figure out if you'd last with me, don't marry me... I wouldn't oppose or try to protest against legislation for this if it were on the table to become an option in the US, cuz, shit, people can do what they want. And I understand some people using this for more of a business arrangement. But I wouldn't want to be with a guy who proposed using it in a romantic relationship.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    ^^^That begs the question what happens when you marry an immigrant? Are they eligible for citizenship after a 2 year wedding, or 5 year, or what?
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by cherryblossomsinspring View Post
    This sounds like someone wanting to hold a woman down and then drop her when a better opportunity arises.

    To me I may still be a hopeless romantic, but If a man said let's do a 2 year marriage I would be dropping him. What ever happened to "til death do us part". I'm thinking that many people these days are not even taking marriage serious. I wouldn't want to marry someone that wanted a 2 year term. I mean what is this a lowered jail sentence? lol If someone feels like their emotions are just not solid enough to last a 2year mark, then it would best to drop them now. I mean do people really want to have 22-42+ex husbands/wives?


    Well I'm pretty sure the local jeweler will enjoy the boom in business.

    The only way I would feel this would be a great choice would be for someone that had a terminal illness. Then again generally anyone truly in love with someone that has died from cancer etc would want to keep the memory of that person for many years to come. Marrying someone new isn't generally on the mind of someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one.
    I agree. I hate this. It's basically saying marriage is something that can be replaced. I want to marry one person and be married until one of us passes on.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Honestly, I think this is a smart idea. No, it's not the most romantic idea in the world, but let's face it: a lot of the time, MARRIAGE isn't the most romantic idea in the world. This is a practical solution to an ongoing problem.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by Optimist View Post

    I never knew that! I like that. Marriage was always a contract but why make it permanent when people can change so much.
    they don't do it for that reason in strict muslim countries, the women get paid and men rent them for however long they want, they agree a price and get married, its really disgusting, just a way to get around islamic laws and the women are usualy drug addicts or in extreme poverty! then when the term is up them men move on and find another woman to have as their extra sexual partner, women in these relationships are usualy very controlled and often locked away! i'm presuming that's what will happen in mexico city,a man gets a woman, has her as a housekeeper, sexual partner, etc etc and when the term is up, bye bye and off to the next conquest and the woman gets nothing!

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by Optimist View Post
    ^^^That begs the question what happens when you marry an immigrant? Are they eligible for citizenship after a 2 year wedding, or 5 year, or what?
    I was just thinking about that... I feel like if this were to be up for debate in the US, the religious right would definitely be quick to be up in arms about "the sanctity of marriage" and, if they couldn't defeat it, would for sure try to add some lines in there about how things like citizenship or other benefits wouldn't count until after a certain number of years. I'm sure that would be one of the very big debate points.

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    Default Re: Fixed Term Marriage?

    Quote Originally Posted by TigerToes View Post
    they don't do it for that reason in strict muslim countries, the women get paid and men rent them for however long they want, they agree a price and get married, its really disgusting, just a way to get around islamic laws and the women are usualy drug addicts or in extreme poverty! then when the term is up them men move on and find another woman to have as their extra sexual partner, women in these relationships are usualy very controlled and often locked away! i'm presuming that's what will happen in mexico city,a man gets a woman, has her as a housekeeper, sexual partner, etc etc and when the term is up, bye bye and off to the next conquest and the woman gets nothing!
    That's pretty grotesque! This would work with a society where the women can support themselves, drive, have reproductive rights etc. They would truly have a choice over whether they wanted to rent or be "rented".
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

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