(wasn't sure where to put this, so I've posted in body business and life support)
I've been dancing for 4-5 months now, and on the whole I'm really enjoying it. But I recently switched to an upscale club, and the competition is FIERCE. I'm not much of a hustler yet, so I've been mainly relying on my looks/friendly attitude to make money...but the stress of working 5 nights a week with such gorgeous girls is really taking it's toll...
I had anorexia for most of my teens, and I've been bulimic ever since. In spite of that, I've maintained an ok weight for about a year and a half...but I'm seriously slipping.
I don't know if it's the dancing, or other life stresses, but obviously i NEED to get a hold on myself or i simply won't have the body to make money any more. I'm terrified this is going to cost me my job - and this illness has already had me 'incapacitated' on mental health grounds since I left college. I really really want to be well enough to work. I just don't know if it's worth undoing all my progress. I'm happy and independant and in love with a wonderful man...but I wouldn't have any of these things if i get really sick again.
Have any of you been through anything similar? I guess what I'm trying to ask is, can I continue to do this job and rebuild my self-confidence, or is this going to destroy me? I've lost nearly 2 dress sizes in 3 weeks and my boobs have shrunk to an A cupmy earnings have dropped to the lowest they've ever been but the sick part of my brain is telling me I can keep living like this...
Sorry to ramble on a bit, but I didn't know how best to get this all out. I'm feeling pretty low at the moment.



my earnings have dropped to the lowest they've ever been but the sick part of my brain is telling me I can keep living like this...
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