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Thread: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

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    Default Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Hi Everyone,

    I am new as a customer to dance club. Last month I paid my first to a nude club and I bought 3 lapdance. The experience was great. Since then I visited different clubs every week.

    Now I found I feel more enjoyable of just chating with the dancers instead of lap dance. The reason is:

    1) 3 songs about 10~15min cost me 80~100 bulks, the time just past so quickly. I was not even totally relexed.

    2) unless the dancers's boobs is natural double D, and I can freely enjoy them, I really don't get too excited about the physical contact

    3) No matter how gorgeous the dancer is, the second time of lap dance is always not as great as the first one.

    I understood that the dancers need to sell the LD to earn money. Mornally, if a girl approched me politely and not so pushy for the dance and wanted to chat for a while, I would buy her a drink, and depends on how much fun from the conversation, I would tip her 10 ~20 bulks.

    Last night I went to a gentaleman's club, where I met a pretty dancer. We had eye contact when she was dancing. Then she came to sit with me, on my legs. Then we chatted, I did massage on her back and head.... we had so much fun for a couple of hours. I bought her about 4 drinks and tipped her several times. Finally, she was called to dance again.
    After that she asked me if she can dance for me. I hesitated. She just hugged me said that she actually already danced for me. So. we ended up with a lap dance.

    I got her phone number, and promised I will see her next Friday. I am not a good story teller. But this was one of my best experience for the strip club so far. I cann't help wondering if she also had as much fun as I do when we were together. If she spent all the time shopping around, she probably would get more money of the same time.

    As you know I'm still new for strip club. Maybe it is just a tactic she used to estabilish a long term customer relationship? Anyway, I realy want to see her again next Friday.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I never sat with a customer buying drinks unless I got a cut of it and it was slow. A few clubs I danced at dancers didn't get a cut of drink money so I only sat for a short time.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I would need to know ahead of time if I am going to be paid for my time sitting with you. Otherwise I am just wasting my time drinking and not making money. You said you will only tip her if you are having 'fun in the conversation'. To me that is not fair to the girl because obviously she comes to work to make money to pay her bills and her rent. The same way you go to work to pay for your expenses.

    I guess it depends on the girl but if that is your approach at the strip club, then let the dancer know ahead of time that you will be paying for her time sitting with you....and if u aren't 'having fun in the conversation' let her go and make some money.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I think it's okay to spend maybe a half hour with her if you dont plan on getting a dance. She is there to work, this is her bread and butter and if you sit with her for hours she is not going to be able to pay her bills. If you want to spend more than a half hour with her then you should really pay for at least one dance. Think of it this way...how would you feel if when you're at work and the boss made you punch out for a few hours without pay?

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I hate customers that want to "massage" me and talk for free (drinks don't count..we don't give a crap about drinks). Tell them up front you want to pay for their time and negotiate a price so she knows what she's getting into. I think you are just being a cheap ass, if you wanna really pay for her time it should come in at the same song rate for dancing and if we are talking about hours and not songs it should be hundreds. Your conversation does not pay the bills buddy.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post
    Last night I went to a gentaleman's club, where I met a pretty dancer. We had eye contact when she was dancing. Then she came to sit with me, on my legs. Then we chatted, I did massage on her back and head.... we had so much fun for a couple of hours. I bought her about 4 drinks and tipped her several times. Finally, she was called to dance again.
    After that she asked me if she can dance for me. I hesitated. She just hugged me said that she actually already danced for me. So. we ended up with a lap dance.
    You don't say here how much you tipped her to sit with you. I know plenty of dancers who would gladly sit and talk rather than dance but it's going to cost you for their time and we are talking in the hundreds, not $20 here and there. As for your particular lady, well, it's on her how she conducts her business but I wouldn't expect every dancer to sit for more than a few minutes if you are not spending continuously.
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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post

    I got her phone number, and promised I will see her next Friday. I am not a good story teller. But this was one of my best experience for the strip club so far. I cann't help wondering if she also had as much fun as I do when we were together. If she spent all the time shopping around, she probably would get more money of the same time.

    As you know I'm still new for strip club. Maybe it is just a tactic she used to estabilish a long term customer relationship? Anyway, I realy want to see her again next Friday.
    No, its just business. Maybe the club was slow. Maybe she's not a great hustler. Maybe she was having an "off" night and it was more pleasant to get paid to relax than the possible alternatives of getting nothing. Plus, you haven't been clear, how are you paying? $10-20 bucks extra tip per drink? Per dance? Per time period?

    I've always been happy to sit and drink and chill and make jokes with a custy for an extended period, but I had better be getting paid the same amount as if I was dancing.

    Some clubs give commissions on drinks, most don't. The ones that do generally only throw you $2 or so unless you are selling a bottle, so drinks don't matter to dancers and don't pay the bills.


    Quote Originally Posted by ObsidianButterfly View Post
    I think it's okay to spend maybe a half hour with her if you dont plan on getting a dance. She is there to work, this is her bread and butter and if you sit with her for hours she is not going to be able to pay her bills. If you want to spend more than a half hour with her then you should really pay for at least one dance. Think of it this way...how would you feel if when you're at work and the boss made you punch out for a few hours without pay?
    WHAT? Half an hour? Are you a stripper? Pay her $20 for sitting for 30 minutes? Fuck that shit? The least I'm willing to accept..and this has to be during a SLOOOOOOOW dead time at the club, is $20 for every other song..which would end up being around $100 for 30 minutes. If club is busy, guy better be paying on par with dancing otherwise I'm out of there. And no dancer should sit with a guy for more than 2 songs without him flashing some money. I don't care if he isn't ready for the dance after 2 songs, he better flash her some tip cash and commit to dances otherwise, I'm fucking out of there. This will vary in diff clubs with their own hustles, but I'd rather sit at the bar and play video poker than allow myself to be touched and massaged for half an hour for a drink I don't want and $20 which doesn't even cover tip out.



    Quote Originally Posted by CherryPepper View Post
    I hate customers that want to "massage" me and talk for free (drinks don't count..we don't give a crap about drinks). Tell them up front you want to pay for their time and negotiate a price so she knows what she's getting into. I think you are just being a cheap ass, if you wanna really pay for her time it should come in at the same song rate for dancing and if we are talking about hours and not songs it should be hundreds. Your conversation does not pay the bills buddy.
    THIS, exactly. Ugh, I hate the massagers and touchers as well.

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    You don't say here how much you tipped her to sit with you. I know plenty of dancers who would gladly sit and talk rather than dance but it's going to cost you for their time and we are talking in the hundreds, not $20 here and there. As for your particular lady, well, it's on her how she conducts her business but I wouldn't expect every dancer to sit for more than a few minutes if you are not spending continuously.
    Exactly.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I spent a bout 200. But it is still not as much as she probably could get from lap dance. Maybe I realy should make up for her next time.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    How long did it take for you to spend $200? And the $200 doesn't count drinks you bought her, right? Because drinks don't count.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    about 1 and half hour? No It doesn't include the drinks.

    If she wanted to leave, she could give me a hint and I won't hold her. She even didn't sell the dance untill she was called to stage......

    I really hope she had a good time with me. Anyway, next time I won't occupy her for so long.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post
    about 1 and half hour? No It doesn't include the drinks.

    If she wanted to leave, she could give me a hint and I won't hold her. She even didn't sell the dance untill she was called to stage......

    I really hope she had a good time with me. Anyway, next time I won't occupy her for so long.
    I don't see anything wrong with this. In fact, it is more or less my gig in some clubs.

    Bajie, there are many clubs out there where you'll find girls willing to sit for 90 minutes to 2 hours and earn $200 for non-strenuous work. However, this approach tends to work better on slower nights and in smaller, more local clubs. Also, what makes me, IMHO, a fairly easy tip for time customer is that I am not proprietary and if she has a live on one the hook then I have no problem with her swinging back later to resume. Also, as an aside, I never hand out anything less than a $20 bill - a ten just seems cheesy somehow.

    On the flip side, however, this doesn't work so well in high hustle clubs, such as places with high tourist concentrations and clubs located in downtown city environments. When the next guy that says "yes" may be one who buys a string of expensive dances or a CR/VIP, then a guy doling it out in small pieces over a stretch of time is not really an attractive customer.

    Anyway, if this going to remain your gig then you simply need to pick your spots well and manage it properly. And, of course, as others have said, do not waste a girl's time and if she is not someone who you want to give money to then cut her loose quickly.

    Good luck!

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    It was saturday night. The club was crowded actually. But not too many buying lap dance, because when we went to the VIP room, it was mostly empty. I have been to othe clubs, and I can see how busy those girls doing business.

    Anyway, if I just buy one lap dance per visit, and I prefer to sit in the club and drink and watching the show most of the time, is that okay?

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post
    It was saturday night. The club was crowded actually. But not too many buying lap dance, because when we went to the VIP room, it was mostly empty. I have been to othe clubs, and I can see how busy those girls doing business.

    Anyway, if I just buy one lap dance per visit, and I prefer to sit in the club and drink and watching the show most of the time, is that okay?

    No. Don't go into a strip club and nurse a beer while spending a total of 30 dollars. If you just want a LD, go in, get your dance, and get out. Once you have emptied your wallet you should be walking yourself to the ATM, if not the door. Thanks.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I hate to play devils advocate here, and I'm certainly not saying that being the guy that's just sitting there taking up floor space is a GOOD thing... BUT.

    On slower nights, if you have people in there (even taking up space) there's a greater chance of people walking in and staying longer.

    I've had 15+ girls on shift, and zero customers in the club and it be a trickle of in-out type guys until there is finally a number of people built up so the club doesn't look "dead" regardless of the number of dancers (which is the entire point).

    Some guys, even the ones that WILL spend the money, don't want to be the only guy or a part of a very small group of guys in the club.

    Just weed them out and don't waste your time.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    After some days reading here it seems like this forum is dominated by the most broken species of dancers existing.
    Making money in adult business but having the worst possible attitude to men as they are and sex overall.
    I know clubs where some sweet girl next door girls can be found from time to time may be weekend only more of the attitude make/have a little fun and make a little money usualy they are younger as a lot of the audience.
    I have also observed guys managing somehow beeing sourounded by dancer(s) all the evening wo bootle after bottle or dance after dance.
    May be you should not pay nothing but you are definitely not at all responsible for somebody else making more then you in less time while thinking of you as the biggest asshole ore looser.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post
    Anyway, if I just buy one lap dance per visit, and I prefer to sit in the club and drink and watching the show most of the time, is that okay?
    Quote Originally Posted by lokikola View Post
    No. Don't go into a strip club and nurse a beer while spending a total of 30 dollars. If you just want a LD, go in, get your dance, and get out. Once you have emptied your wallet you should be walking yourself to the ATM, if not the door. Thanks.
    Since he said "drink" and not "nurse a beer" I can only opine on that...

    Bajie, you'll win no popularity contests on here by saying that you don't want to pay the girls. After all, most of them earn a living by selling dances/CRs/VIPs and this is a stripper support site after all.

    Having said that, the "buy dances/CRs/VIPs or gtfo" mentality held by some dancers is a little short sighted IMHO. The club also needs to be profitable in order to provide a place for the girls to dance and, in many clubs, dancers' house fees are not enough to pay the freight without the income brought in by cover charges and bar tabs.

    There are many clubs out there that keep house fees at or even well below $50 (of course this is along with other staff tipouts, but the club doesn't get those), which isn't exactly a fortune. Many of these same clubs also discount house fees even more for girls willing to come in early, work certain shifts, etc. In fact, I would venture to say that a lot of clubs make a lot more on cover charges and bar tabs over the course of the night than they do on dancer house fees.

    Idk, but it seems to me that if clubs were to get rid of the bar hangers and other types that don't buy dances, then many dancers would be have to pay higher freight in order to dance in these clubs.

    Anyway, just my

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by lokikola View Post
    No. Don't go into a strip club and nurse a beer while spending a total of 30 dollars. If you just want a LD, go in, get your dance, and get out. Once you have emptied your wallet you should be walking yourself to the ATM, if not the door. Thanks.
    I'm not sure who you are attacking with this response but it has nothing to do with the OP's post or what he is asking...
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    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post
    I spent a bout 200. But it is still not as much as she probably could get from lap dance.
    Quote Originally Posted by bajie View Post
    about 1 and half hour? No It doesn't include the drinks.

    If she wanted to leave, she could give me a hint and I won't hold her. She even didn't sell the dance untill she was called to stage......
    I have to agree with rick here. I don't see a problem with what the OP spent or how much time the lady in question spent with him for it. I realize that it's human nature for a dancer to want as much as she can get but, quite frankly, in my area, most girls would be happy to get $200 small for just sitting. Of course it's going to vary depending on how busy the club is. None of my favs would sit for that amount if they had regulars walking around who will do $300 VIP with them but, as I always say, timing is everything. I always go on slow days or early in the evening and I routinely spend a couple of hours with my favs before and/or after doing a VIP room with them. I buy drinks, dinner and stage tip but I don't pay for table time. I would never expect that sort of ROI in a busy weekend shift.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    He asked, I answered. It's not a theater, its a strip club. If you know you're not going to spend any more money then you really shouldn't be in the club anymore. Finish your drink and go home.

    Now if you guys think you have some really cool gig going and it works for you, then thats great, I'm happy for you. But from my perspective I don't enjoy dancing for people who aren't going to put money in MY pocket for the show.

    The whole idea that if a the club only has a few patrons then the dancers shouldn't have a problem keeping them company for free/little money is like all else, an opinion. I used to think of it that way also and did that when I first danced but its just a waste of time. Don't get me wrong, if the guy is cool I wouldn't mind, but that doesn't happen often. So, no, I don't think that we should try to keep 3 or 4 guys in the club by offering our services for free just so it looks 'busy.'

    Fuck, a club can be crowded and you can still see dancers not approaching customers, I've been one of those. Why? Because we're open after the regular bars close, all these drunk dudes come in here with no money and if they have any they spend it all on one dance as soon as they walk in the door and stay another 4 hours to watch a show for free. This happened a lot at my old club with college students coming in late in the night. Its called fake busy. Its when the club is making money but the dancers are not.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    in what establishment is it okay to not spend money and stay in the establishment for hours? i don't know what it is about strip clubs that makes the men think, "i am out of money. i will stay until last call regardless."

    this buying drinks nonsense makes men forget where they are.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    in what establishment is it okay to not spend money and stay in the establishment for hours? i don't know what it is about strip clubs that makes the men think, "i am out of money. i will stay until last call regardless."

    this buying drinks nonsense makes men forget where they are.
    LOL, I don't think it makes them forget. They just don't care. As I said in another thread, guys who don't spend are there to be ignored by dancers. In any sales environment there are going to be potential customers and total time wasters. The key is to learn how to weed the time wasters out and move on to the next prospect. They are never going to go away.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    ^ We have these customers who just sit at the bar like they live there. They don't have to pay cover ...why?! Its byob so they buy NOTHING. They are there every single time I work and I'm sure they are there during most open hours of the club as well. I completely ignore them and figure if everyone else did too, they wouldn't wanna come back, but....most dancers have befriended them and even drink/smoke with them and hug them, get rides, etc. I don't get those girls at all. It's super annoying. Just sayin I would rather be sitting by myself or in the dr than pay them any attention and encourage them.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I have to agree with rick here. I don't see a problem with what the OP spent or how much time the lady in question spent with him for it. I realize that it's human nature for a dancer to want as much as she can get but, quite frankly, in my area, most girls would be happy to get $200 small for just sitting. Of course it's going to vary depending on how busy the club is. None of my favs would sit for that amount if they had regulars walking around who will do $300 VIP with them but, as I always say, timing is everything. I always go on slow days or early in the evening and I routinely spend a couple of hours with my favs before and/or after doing a VIP room with them. I buy drinks, dinner and stage tip but I don't pay for table time. I would never expect that sort of ROI in a busy weekend shift.
    I had a customer who would come in, spend $200 on me, expect me to sit for a few hours then leave. I had no problems with this at all. It was the same amount I'd be getting for a dance. I can't remember if he bought me a drink or not (we didn't get paid for drinks here)but the money was good.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by CherryPepper View Post
    ^ We have these customers who just sit at the bar like they live there. They don't have to pay cover ...why?! Its byob so they buy NOTHING. They are there every single time I work and I'm sure they are there during most open hours of the club as well. I completely ignore them and figure if everyone else did too, they wouldn't wanna come back, but....most dancers have befriended them and even drink/smoke with them and hug them, get rides, etc. I don't get those girls at all. It's super annoying. Just sayin I would rather be sitting by myself or in the dr than pay them any attention and encourage them.
    I despise these guys. I once got yelled at because I refused to go topless for these guys. They never tipped, never spent much money at all even at the bar. Plus it was free admission so many would bring in their own booze.

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    Default Re: Is that okay I just wanted to have a drink with dancers?

    I think everyone has their own preferences. As a new customer to strip club I learned a lot from this topic.

    I really don't like to be pushed for lap dances, for the reasons I already said in the beginning. I wanted to spend several hundred buks for some relexation, not be feed like fast food. Once I went to a clud and I met several girl who gaves really professional dancing. That was great, and people was crazy for them and threw hundreds of dollars on the stage. I think the fun of strip club is not most just for physical contact from lap dance.

    If every girl would treat me like that, I simple won't visit this club any more. I understood that the girls need to pay their bills, and I am willing to spend within my budget.

    I bought drinks, I tipped every girls on stage, no matter if I like their dance or not. Any girl came to talk to me, I would buy her a drink or give her some tip. If she pleased me more I would tip her accordingly. I don't think there is anything wrong.

    Finally, I realy like that girl. I wanted to be her regular every weekend......

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    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 07-10-2008, 09:19 PM
  2. choosing not to drink- ? for dancers, bartenders, managers, etc.
    By toxicgirl in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: 03-01-2008, 09:47 AM
  3. How many dancers drink at work?
    By xmarx52 in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 09-24-2003, 03:09 PM

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