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Thread: How do you meet people?

  1. #1
    Veteran Member Cammi's Avatar
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    Default How do you meet people?

    I don't really have many people in my life. A few months ago I moved into a studio flat in North London, I only know a few people in the city and I don't see them regularly. I'm single and lonely. I work for 4 days a week at my current club, 7-4. I don't normally wake up until after 1pm and I only have a few hours before I have to get ready for work. And up till now I haven't been making enough money to spend it on socialising.

    Finding friends is hard enough under normal circumstances, how do you do it while stripping? Any suggestions, guys?

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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    I know I'm not a stripper or industry related etc but I came across this post and it resonated with me too.

    I am lonely and don't know how to meet people either.

    You might think its desperate and that I am some kind of loser for writing this because I'm just a normal guy on this stripper board but I am going to give this a shot anyway.

    Im from the Uk as well and might be moving to London for work sometime next year but for the most part thats irrelevant.

    The point is, i understand how you feel and could use a friend too so if you would allow me to be one, i would be grateful.

    So if you want to talk, just talk, nothing pervy or sleazy on msn messnger or something and get to know each other or just speak for support, I am cool with that.

    And if not, that is fine too. Im just taking a shot in the dark cuz its hard to meet people.

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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    What sort of things are you interested? If you're artsy, take a class at a nearby recreation centre or community college. If you're sportier, join an organized team or go on a weekend trek with an organized group. If you do things you're interested in with your free time, you're bound to run into like-minded people, so just get out there and go to a play, a talk, a pool, wherever! Also check out boards in coffee shops, rec. centres, and community colleges for notices of things going in on your neighbourhood. Great opportunity to get to know people in your area.

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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    I don't think your comment was directed at me but I have tried some of those things and failed over a long period of time which is why I have resorted to this.

    I have joined clubs, done things, trained with people etc. Unfortunately, the people I trained with became training friends, the people I did hobbies with or went out with became hobby friends, the people I worked with became work friends.

    I.e all of these people I only see when I am doing whatever activity. None of these people hang out or chill on off time.

    The best way to explain it is if you have an job, you see those people every day and get along but they don't come over to your house, you don't watch movies with them, you don't hang out with them, they don't get to know you. These are the sort of people you don't say racist jokes too incase they take it the wrong way or don't tell that you are gonna have a sick day just incase your boss finds out.

    Its not the real deal. Its unfortunate. Anyway, I didn't mean to jump on the opening posts bandwagon. I just get what shes saying. Its a difficulty I am currently having.

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    Moderator Aurora_Sunset's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    ^^ I feel ya. I've tried all that too and gotten the same results - the whole "work friends" or "hobby friends" but not real friends thing. I've only had one job where I actually made real friends outside of work. At my last job, I liked the people there, but they made me so uncomfortable constantly making jokes/derogatory comments about strippers (seriously, it was like every day ) that even when they did talk about going out all together, I would purposely hang in the back and pretend I wasn't listening because I didn't feel comfortable getting too close to them. But anyway, that's just my personal story. I don't know how it is for others, but I understand not really seeing people outside of work/hobbies/whatever. I've never been that way either... Sooo I don't have a whole lot of advice since I'm basically in the same boat. Just wanted to say you're not the only one, and it can be hard for kinda shy people to develop real friends at work/clubs/classes. But that's really the only way - just keep trying until you eventually click with a few of the people. At the very least, some sort of social interaction, even if it's not with "real" friends is still good for you until you find some real good friends.

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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    Im making a point to meet more people (I should update this on my November goals list)
    It also resonates with me so i can sympathize.

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    Veteran Member innes's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    I find that *most* of the people who you meet through clubs, sports, school, etc. will not turn out to be lifelong friends. But do you expect the first person you meet to be a lifelong friend? I don't know about you, but I am relatively picky about friends. I'm fine with having acquaintances or even "kinda friends" but an actual friend ... kinda like a boyfriend/girlfriend, I feel like there needs to be some kind of chemistry/attraction/bond.

    It takes time, trying out different activities. Sometimes you'll be the "odd one out" until there is a new "odd one out" in a club or a class ... then you can bond.

    There was this really cool party that I went to one time (with my boyfriend though). It was obvious that everyone there knew each other. Yeah, they were nice, but it was still kinda weird. We ended up meeting another couple. Turns out it was their first party with that crowd too. A year later, the four of us are like best friends.

    Like, my first year in college, I had acquaintances but no good friends. Second year, this girl joined from another similar program, and we hit it off, and we still talk now.

    It does take time and meeting some people and whatnot. But eventually you will find people!
    InnesX

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    God/dess threlayer's Avatar
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    Default Re: How do you meet people?

    Eventually some of the worthwhile acquaintences will become friends.Friends are not made overnight. This is one of the problems in moving away, for everyone. Casual acquaintences you see regularly will often become candidates for friendships. You just have to keep your B.S. filter working.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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