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Thread: So its really ok to approach strippers?

  1. #26
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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    Yep had it happened where a guy wanted me to talk to him and wouldn't tip me. I was talking to another dancer when this guy flagged me down. I asked him if he wanted a dance and he said no, he just wanted to chat. I said ok for tips and he said "what tips". He then said my job was to talk to him and that he knew I was paid by the club. He even complained to the manager but he said we are not paid and no tipping means no talking.
    A few weeks back, I saw a customer approach every dancer on shift. He would talk for two or three minutes and then the dancer would leave and he'd go back to the bar. Then he'd approach another dancer and the cycle continued once they figured out he wasn't buying or tipping.

    My regular freed up and sat down to chat. The guy started staring at us as if he had x-ray vision. I think he was waiting for her get up and talk to him? Or wondering why our conversation was taking longer than 2 minutes? As we kept talking, he kept staring... and staring... and staring. Creeped me out! Went to the VIP earlier than usual just to get out of his eyesight.

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    Featured Member lopaw's Avatar
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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdog83 View Post
    I would never ever approach a girl with a guy...that screams douchebag all over.

    This applies to female customers as well.
    I know that we are not as plentiful, but if you see a dancer sitting and talking with a woman who is not dressed as a dancer, don't automatically assume that that woman is another dancer in civvies or an employee that you can go up to and interrupt. I have had this happen countless times, and the last time it did not end well for the interrupter .

    Again - I know that seeing us is kinda rare, but we SCJ ladies take our SC visits just as seriously as you fellas do .

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Let_It_Fly View Post

    Im the type to very rarely ask for dances. If im not approached I take that as a sign I'm not someone who you care to dance for.
    There's no such thing as someone that a stripper "doesn't care to dance for"*

    This is my job. I don't give a shit who I dance for. It has nothing to do with you, or whether she "likes" you or "cares to/wants to" dance for you. That's like saying, "if the guy walking around selling hotdogs at the ballpark doesn't specifically come up and ask me if I want to buy one, he obviously just doesnt WANT to sell me one." He'll sell one to any paying customer. But he's prolly just giving priority to the customers waving cash around or motioning him to come over, which makes sense, right?

    If you're proactive about it, you can come into a stripclub and get exactly who you want. Just ask. She won't say no (unless she's already really busy). Like I said... job.



    *unless it's someone she's had a bad experience with, of course.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdog83 View Post
    I would never ever approach a girl with a guy...that screams douchebag all over.
    I was just wondering if she is chit chatting with her friends and just hanging out etc.

    So I can really just go up, get her name and ask for a dance? It just seems so wrong to do that but eh, its a SC!
    It's her job to give dances. She's at work.

    She is "hanging out" as a way to pass the time until the next dance. She doesn't wanna sit on her ass and do nothing ("hang out") all night and go home broke.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Luna123 View Post
    There's no such thing as someone that a stripper "doesn't care to dance for"*

    This is my job. I don't give a shit who I dance for. It has nothing to do with you, or whether she "likes" you or "cares to/wants to" dance for you. That's like saying, "if the guy walking around selling hotdogs at the ballpark doesn't specifically come up and ask me if I want to buy one, he obviously just doesnt WANT to sell me one." He'll sell one to any paying customer. But he's prolly just giving priority to the customers waving cash around or motioning him to come over, which makes sense, right?

    If you're proactive about it, you can come into a stripclub and get exactly who you want. Just ask. She won't say no (unless she's already really busy). Like I said... job.



    *unless it's someone she's had a bad experience with, of course.
    I've literally had a 1-1/2" high stack of mostly singles in front of me at the bar for 30min before I had an offer. Mind you I tipped the bar for my 2 drinks & tipped the 4-5 ladies seen on stage. Some clubs I visit I'm considered a little too hood, in others (in the same attire) I'm a little too well dressed. I scope & soap before going, so BO is not an issue. I just can't for life of me see how a dancer would walk by (a stack of cash) & at least introduce herself.

    I would pay to see dancers take a hotdog vendor approach, screaming at the top of voice while walking through the club..."I got some dances here...right here $20 dollar dances...nice hot dances"

    On another note I was there about 45 minutes bought 5 dances between the only 2 ladies that approached me & tipped the bartender on the way out just because....

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    These are Gentleman's Clubs you are visiting. Be a gentleman always but that word does include man, so approach, if you like what you see.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Let_It_Fly View Post
    I've literally had a 1-1/2" high stack of mostly singles in front of me at the bar for 30min before I had an offer. Mind you I tipped the bar for my 2 drinks & tipped the 4-5 ladies seen on stage. Some clubs I visit I'm considered a little too hood, in others (in the same attire) I'm a little too well dressed. I scope & soap before going, so BO is not an issue. I just can't for life of me see how a dancer would walk by (a stack of cash) & at least introduce herself.
    In some clubs, there are unwritten rules about approaching customers at the bar or onstage. Just saying, this is a possibility here. Generally a cust sitting at the bar with no space for another dancer to sit next to him, or at the tip rack right under the stage of another dancer..is an indication that he is not ready for company. This varies amongst clubs.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Let_It_Fly View Post
    I've literally had a 1-1/2" high stack of mostly singles in front of me at the bar for 30min before I had an offer. Mind you I tipped the bar for my 2 drinks & tipped the 4-5 ladies seen on stage. Some clubs I visit I'm considered a little too hood, in others (in the same attire) I'm a little too well dressed. I scope & soap before going, so BO is not an issue. I just can't for life of me see how a dancer would walk by (a stack of cash) & at least introduce herself.
    LOL. I don't know where you hang, but where I club most dancers' thongs aren't gonna' get all moist over a stack of singles. Just sayin'...

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by BringOnTheMen View Post
    Yup, we are strippers- we know what an inch and a half of singles is. Best case scenario, they are brand new and crisp and stuck together, so you have about $60. Much more likely scenario, they are regular singles so you have about $30 max.
    "Mostly" singles...the other 1/2" or so were fresh $20 bills out of the atm. I say that not to infer im some sort of big spender, but I don't want to be confused with some sort of pretend spender.

    Now with that said would there have been more attention if the $20 side of the stack were facing up, as opposed to the $1 side?

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    LOL. I don't know where you hang, but where I club most dancers' thongs aren't gonna' get all moist over a stack of singles. Just sayin'...
    Next time I'll build a castle of gold bullion, surrounded a moat of d class vvs stones with a drawbridge of $100 bills leading to a forest of origami trees of bearer bonds. Maybe that would " dampen " things...just saying

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by BringOnTheMen View Post
    I personally hate when people display their money but if you insist on doing so, then yes, displaying 20s will get you much further than displaying 1s.

    However I will not approach you because whenever someone talks about how much money they have/spend/make or show it to me, it means I'm not getting any of it.
    I seriously thought otherwise. I dont do it to be "showy". It's just an indicator that I am willing to spend. I presumed time wasters was number 2 pet peeve in the club. I would have thought that dancers would overall prefer if patrons had glowing numbers over their head indicating what they have & what they are willing to spend.

    I'll take what you've said (to not show $) & see if there is difference in the clubs I visit.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Let_It_Fly View Post
    Next time I'll build a castle of gold bullion, surrounded a moat of d class vvs stones with a drawbridge of $100 bills leading to a forest of origami trees of bearer bonds. Maybe that would " dampen " things...just saying
    Perfect! That will certainly do the trick.

    OR...

    You could simply let your actions and spending speak for themselves. If you are spending, they will come. Now I realize that this is less flashy than your current approach, but nothing says "I'm trying too hard" like a stack of one dollar bills.

    There really is no upside to stacking bills, of any denomination, in front of you. A lot of guys play the ol' stack-the-ones game in an attempt to garner attention, but dancers are savvy to this and, any way you shake it, $60 in ones is still just $60. Now increasing the denomination would certainly draw more attention, but then you run the risk of being viewed by some as a silly mark and the attention that you do get might be the wrong kind.

    How you carry yourself is completely up to you, but I happen to prefer an approach that shows that I'm in control of myself and don't need to impress anybody.

    Anyway, just my
    Last edited by rickdugan; 12-14-2011 at 11:05 AM.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Seems as if my browser took an arrow to the knee, & I don't feel like rewriting it over. Short version ...

    I don't go in acting like Thornton Melon. I also find it futile to try & impress any dancer. Most of them have seen and heard it all. Chances are they have met someone better looking, with a better body, & a bigger bank account.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by KS_Stevia View Post
    In some clubs, there are unwritten rules about approaching customers at the bar or onstage. Just saying, this is a possibility here. Generally a cust sitting at the bar with no space for another dancer to sit next to him, or at the tip rack right under the stage of another dancer..is an indication that he is not ready for company. This varies amongst clubs.
    This particular place didn't seem that way. To put it all into context I'll try to explain what I remember about the layout of the club.

    The bar wrapped around maybe a third of the stage. Where the bar ended thats where the lower stage seating began & location of first pole on stage. Bar & stage are about 3' apart. I think there was 2 on at a time. I remember at least one guy got offered at the stage. The 2 dancers on stage were working opposite ends. So guys at the middle didn't have any particular dancers attention. Same at the bar, since they seem to work the poles in the middle third & the third opposite of the bar. So i believe guys at the bar would get approached if nobody in particular on stage had their attention.

    Now at the bar between buying drinks, tipping bartenders, tipping the stage, as well as "no" tipping if necessary, I felt it wasnt too flashy to have some my funds exposed.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Let_It_Fly View Post
    I've literally had a 1-1/2" high stack of mostly singles in front of me at the bar for 30min before I had an offer. Mind you I tipped the bar for my 2 drinks & tipped the 4-5 ladies seen on stage. Some clubs I visit I'm considered a little too hood, in others (in the same attire) I'm a little too well dressed. I scope & soap before going, so BO is not an issue. I just can't for life of me see how a dancer would walk by (a stack of cash) & at least introduce herself.

    I would pay to see dancers take a hotdog vendor approach, screaming at the top of voice while walking through the club..."I got some dances here...right here $20 dollar dances...nice hot dances"

    On another note I was there about 45 minutes bought 5 dances between the only 2 ladies that approached me & tipped the bartender on the way out just because....
    Ah ok, I didn't know you had a stack of 1's in front of you.
    In which case, now I totally understand why you weren't approached.

    Let me echo the sentiment expressed above that, in mine & i think most strippers' experiences, the guys who stack their $ on the table almost always spend nothing, very little, are doing it just for attention, will try to proposition us for sex, want a girl to kiss their ass for a half-hour and MAYBE get like 1 table dance, are just using the cash to tip girls on stage & their waitress a buck or 2, etc.

    If you want a girl to know you're interested, tip her on stage, call her over, have a waitress/bouncer bring her, etc. If you dig her & want her to know you want her to stick around & that you're willing to seriously spend, buy a few dances early on without wasting too much of her time, and when you open your wallet to pay she'll prolly notice all the 20's, hundreds, etc. and stick around. We're perceptive like that

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    If customers didn't approach me Id be broke... I pretty much never ask for dances. I might come say hi but probably won't even do that. I try and look busy with the stage and my regulars and then customers tend to walk straight up and ask for a dance cause they think Im running around busy and won't have time to see them unless they take action... so ya go for it.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Luna123 View Post
    Ah ok, I didn't know you had a stack of 1's in front of you.
    In which case, now I totally understand why you weren't approached.

    Let me echo the sentiment expressed above that, in mine & i think most strippers' experiences, the guys who stack their $ on the table almost always spend nothing, very little, are doing it just for attention, will try to proposition us for sex, want a girl to kiss their ass for a half-hour and MAYBE get like 1 table dance, are just using the cash to tip girls on stage & their waitress a buck or 2, etc.

    If you want a girl to know you're interested, tip her on stage, call her over, have a waitress/bouncer bring her, etc. If you dig her & want her to know you want her to stick around & that you're willing to seriously spend, buy a few dances early on without wasting too much of her time, and when you open your wallet to pay she'll prolly notice all the 20's, hundreds, etc. and stick around. We're perceptive like that
    I was tipping the stage, the bartender, and prepared to tip any dancer that offered even if I wasn't interested at that time. Just to be clear, I don't/didnt go to be flashy or a pretend spender. On another note I dont do wallets in the club, just cash in pocket. I really don't want to lose my identification in the club or anywhere else for that matter. Also if you look at my previous post about the layout of the club for context my help visualize the situation.

    Im in awe that my actions seem to be frowned upon. Can I ask those ladies who find this to be a negative display, what region do you work inor have worked in, that this is not common.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jessie_tinydancer View Post
    If customers didn't approach me Id be broke... I pretty much never ask for dances. I might come say hi but probably won't even do that. I try and look busy with the stage and my regulars and then customers tend to walk straight up and ask for a dance cause they think Im running around busy and won't have time to see them unless they take action... so ya go for it.
    This by no means is a knock on you, but if I seen a dancer looking so busy I won't bother, because im not taking a number & standing in line. In my travels I have experienced the "deli" style clubs where you really did have to prepay & take a number to get private dances. Just wasn't for me.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    ^Well it works for me. My customers like me because they think Im not money hungry and pushy.
    Last edited by Jessie_tinydancer; 01-17-2012 at 05:08 PM. Reason: edited out my earnings because not necessary to brag to customers about how much I make :D

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Let_It_Fly View Post
    This by no means is a knock on you, but if I seen a dancer looking so busy I won't bother, because im not taking a number & standing in line. In my travels I have experienced the "deli" style clubs where you really did have to prepay & take a number to get private dances. Just wasn't for me.
    Sometimes taking number will lead to better hobby....just saying.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jessie_tinydancer View Post
    ^Well it works for me. My customers like me because they think Im not money hungry and pushy.
    Like I said, I mean no disrespect. Im sure many, including myself, appreciate dancers who are not pushy.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by unbeleavable View Post
    Sometimes taking number will lead to better hobby....just saying.
    I don't want to read to much into that...especially the term "hobby". So hey, whatever tickles your pickle ...

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    For the true SCJ, strip clubbing is a hobby, FYI.

    As for approaching- DO IT! There are lots of reasons why dancers won't approach a particular customer. Maybe you don't stand out from the crowd. Maybe you don't look like her "type". Maybe she is busy and hasn't had time to approach everyone. Maybe the club is too big/busy for her to take time talking to everyone. Maybe another customer upset her earlier and she's talking to other girls until she feels composed enough to start approaching again. Either way, if you like a dancer and she isn't engaged with a customer, introduce yourself.
    If she's with another customer, it can be a little tricky. Observe how long she's been sitting with that customer, whether or not money changes hands, and how well they seem to know each other. If she's been there for 10+ minutes and no money has changed hands, she might be new to dancing and just doesn't know how to excuse herself, in which case, you'll be her knight in shining armor. But always, ALWAYS wait at least ten minutes without money changing hands, introduce yourself to both the dancer and customer, then ask as politely as you possibly can if she is busy. If she gives you a moment, make it apparent that you want dances as soon as she's available. If she says she is busy, politely say that you're sorry to both dancer and customer before excusing yourself.

    As for the argument about visible stacks- DON'T DO IT, unless you're at the tip rail. In clubs I've worked, this is the only acceptable place to leave money out. It will get the attention of the dancer on stage- so be ready to part with those bills or have problems. A stack is supposed to mean "I'm willing to spend this much on any one girl," so only have a stack as big as you are willing to tip each girl. (As in, if you'll only part with $10 per stage set, only have a $10 stack. Replenish the stack as needed.) If you have a $50 stack and you only tip me $2, you are a waste of my time and every girl in the club will be told as much, which means a crappy experience for you. Keeping the stack small gives two benefits for the customer- 1) When you run out of bills at $5, I can excuse that smile, say thank you and move on to other tippers. If you stop at $5 with another $20 still in front of you, you have officially pissed me off. And 2) Strippers have a reputation for also being a bit thieving, and where there's smoke there's fire. Even I've been guilty of ripping guys off for a few bucks when they leave cash out. Making your funds visible makes them a visible target for thieves, dancers and customers alike.
    Anywhere else in the club- you just look like a PL. If it's a stack of small bills like 1s and 5s, you just look like a pretend spender and no girl will take you seriously enough to approach you. If it's a stack of larger bills, any real dancer worth her salt knows that you're not spending that money or you'd already be in VIP/CR/other dances. The only dancers it'll attract are ones that I can basically guarantee you DON'T want at your table. Oh, and thieves, regardless of denomination.
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdog83 View Post
    So its really ok if I see a girl by the bar or something to approach her?
    Is it ok to walk into McDonalds and buy a Big Mac, or do you wait for someone to come out, drag you inside and force one on you?

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    Default Re: So its really ok to approach strippers?

    If I saw the dancer I wanted sitting for ten minutes with anther guy with no money changing hands, I would not walk over and ask her for a dance. I'd tip the waitress five bucks to deliver the message.

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