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Thread: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    I find the conversation about grey areas between SD and escorting very interesting.

    I've thought this kind of arrangement would be good, and if there was a way to advertise for it, there are certainly people who would be interested.

    I've considered escorting, because as has been pointed out, an escort doesn't have to waste a ridiculous amount of time dealing with emailing and talking on the phone, etc. On the other hand, escorts generally have to be open to being intimate with someone they don't find attractive at all. I just don't know if I can manage that successfully enough to do the job properly.

    Ideally, you would find a SD that you would find attractive enough to want to spend time with (and it not feel like a chore), but, not so attractive you wind up falling in love with them, and it becomes just another relationships where the woman wants a commitment and the man just wants a piece of ass to occasionally spend some money on.

    From the websites of some very high dollar escorts I've seen in my city, they almost seem to be more on the courtesan end of things. Their rates are so high, I can only imagine they don't do high volume, it must be a few select men, very wealthy, who they see on a semi regular basis. So that's kind of a like a cross between a SB and an escort. But in order to be able to charge that high of a price, they must have put in time establishing credibility as a regular escort, (who sees a fairly high amount of clients), at some point.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    That's a really good way of looking at it littlemissbliss... I can say though,esp as an independent one does have some control over who to see. Now I have seen guys I'd never choose on my own, but I do usually have some convo first and some guys even tho they may not be physically attractive, have such cool personalities that make up for it. And I have told guys that I prefer not to see them for personal reasons. That's something an agency girl doesn't have the benefit of doing.

    My rate isn't that high, but its enough that I only see on average 3 guys a week. I do most of my business when touring, and I get most of my money from traveling with a guy or seeing someone I've established a thing with to do clockfree and overnight dates.

    I just upped my rate a few months ago, and thinking that in the next couple months I'll move to a two hour minimum. Those are the ones who usually end up being long term are the most generous, and never give me issue with rates and time.

    I'm going to see a guy in two weeks that has done a few overnights and taken me on vacation to key west, this time we are doing a road trip, plus he went shopping to get Christmas and birthday presents for me, and he's bringing me a bunch of spices you can only get in Europe. We are also tentatively talking about me coming to visit him this summer... And yes all our time together is at cost. To top it off... sex isn't even what its all abt. We mostly go out together.

    Being an escort isn't all about sleeping with several guys, you can set your own rate and your rate dictates what kind of guy you'll meet. Meet a few of the right kind of guy and you won't have to see that many guys at all... Plus some awesome perks, and you're total privacy and personal time. That's what I'm working towards. If I can do only multi hour dates and travel and only do up to a date a week, I'd be so freaking happy!
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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    That's nice that as independent you can tactfully decline clients that aren't your cup of tea, or whatever.

    Regarding agencies, I have considered that too - I know the ads I see for the higher end agencies *say* that you never have to see anyone you don't want to, but even in my inexperienced mind, something tells me that's probably bs. I can't imagine an agency, no matter how well run, would be too happy on turning down a client simply because you just find him too repulsive physically, particularly if he's wealthy and they know he pays well.

    It seems like you almost have to put in at least some time with an agency before you can be a successful independent though? I find the whole reviews thing to be completely obnoxious. When I read the TER boards, they seem pretty tame in my area, but still. Is it really necessary to brag about every detail of every encounter, like they're all a bunch of 13 year old boys? Blech.

    It's like hello! It's sex with a good looking woman folks. (At least, hopefully good looking, at a $300 and up rate!). I'm just amazed at how many complainers are on there, worrying they might spend a few extra dollars and not get all 50 of their "special" desires. God forbid, they don't get value for every single penny they spend. You can just imagine what these people are like in their regular lives. You know they split every check for dinner with friends down to the exact pennies! So tacky. It seems like it takes away from the whole process of having a nice experience. If I ever did the work, I'd rather be at a higher rate, and just occasionally see a client or two, around my regular job schedule.

    I'm still willing to meet a few more potential SD's. I've got dates w/two potentials from SA this week, and then another guy from the site is coming to my city the week after that, and wants to have dinner.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Quote Originally Posted by luke View Post
    I would like to offer an alternative view from a guy's perspective. This is based on talking to friends, lurking on various boards, and my own experiences.

    Obviously most guys are looking for sex. As some posters have asked, why don't they find a prostitute. Some other posters assume many SD wannabes are looking for cheaper alternatives to prostitutes. Some probably are, but not always. Take the guy cited by the OP. $1,000 for 2 meetings a month comes out to $500 per meeting. That is not cheaper than most escorts. If he really wanted to save money he could get a better deal from many escorts and be assured he will get sex and even know what acts she will perform if he peruses the review boards. If it were just sex why indeed wouldn't he get an escort?

    Some men find sex preferable if they can imagine the lady likes them or at least is not repulsed by them. Obviously money is the main factor, but many of the women on the SD sites will not sleep with the men if there is not some attraction. So a SB is preferable to a escort because it is easier for the guy to believe the woman is at least minimally attracted to them.

    Some men also don't like the idea of having sex with someone who has had sex with large numbers of other men. Of course, a SB could have a large number of other partners, but what we don't know doesn't hurt us. On the other hand it's kind of hard to pretend an escort is only sleeping with you.

    Based on my own experience and indeed the OP says this herself, there are women who don't mind having sex for money if they find the guy reasonably attractive and it is one guy at a time. One might laugh at these distinctions but these feelings do exist.

    Given the motives of some men that I described above, and the the feelings of some women, that I described in the previous paragraph, there does appear to be a market for semi-exclusive escorting, or whatever you want to call it. The guys offering $xx per meeting and the women accepting these offers may not fit your definition of SD/SB relationship but this does seem to work for some people.
    Exactly what Obenta said.

    If you're a woman on the site you will notice that most of the men are hideous. You would think with all of the money they had they could spend time at the gym, get some plastic surgery or hell stop fucking eating!!

    So the whole $1000 for two meetings would not be 2 hours a month. Hell that probably wouldn't be so bad. These guys want calls, text, they want to date and do dinner, they want the girl dressed in expensive outfits that they aren't paying for. They want to get some naked pictures to entice them for another cheap month. Seriously she would do better to escort for $500 an hour and make sure that clock is working. These fake SDs which is the majority of the site don't know what it is to be a real SD. They are not "giving" money to a woman that finds them attractive because if that were the case they wouldn't need to be on the damn site in the first place. They want a cheap alternative to an escort while still hiding that they are having an affair behind their wife's back. Also the ages of the men typically have been late 50's and up. Who really wants to fuck their grand father? No one. These woman are not attracted to them because without the money they wouldn't have them. Woman like power yes, but why date crusty old grandpa when you can just wait until he dies off and fuck with the hot studly son after he inherits the company?

    Bottom line : It's money for sex with most of the men on the site. They just need extra ego boosts throughout the fake relationship. When the money goes away so does the sugar baby. Now why would that be if she's so attracted to him? Also these men are cheap. Also they don't want to feel like "losers" for paying for an escort. On a site like this they can sit back and make struggling women jump through hoops for pennies. Hell some of these guys don't give anything to the sugar babies but fake promises.

    I mean these guys are telling these new girls that they need a "TEST DRIVE" before spending $200 for 6 hours of their time? How the hell will someone pay off their college like that? I've heard serious horror stories of girls kissing guys with no teeth. Or being taken to some roach infested motel after sitting on a bus for 2 hours to meet him.

    What I've heard from sugar babies on the site is that the younger hotter guys there are the real deal. When a hot successful man can get laid easily then he has nothing to prove when he decides to sugar date. To me he's looking to pamper someone that will not expect a relationship or marriage in the end.

    So yeah I'm not buying the ooh she's attracted to him line. She's attracted to the rent being paid , the shoes she gets to buy and the college bills going away. Paid bills are always sexy.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    So again I would suggest staying in the $3,000 to $5,000 a month range. If a man wants me to have a "relationship" with him in sugarland then I better be spending my time not working. I see sugar dating as a job. Going out and dates with a bunch of men to see if they are a fit? Who has time for potential money when you can spend time working to make it instead. When I was on the site I noticed I was spending more time messaging back and forth than actually working. That's when I realized that the sugar search was costing me too much. It's free to join but free time isn't free when it's costing valuable time better spent earning money.

    I almost thought of telling them to show up in free chat so I could get the bs out of the way between privates. Let's just say they hate cam models too. The way we make money is frowned upon since they want to feel they are the only man that exists to us. Some have even been bold enough to say they want to start giving funds and wants the "fake relationship" to have marriage penciled in.


    I was like wow , so self starter arranged marriages now? Pay me to fall in love? Wow what a neat concept! ffs.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    The one time I went against my better judgement and had dinner with a bitter old fake SD, I remember him griping about "some woman" who had written to him, who had that she wanted a 10k to 20k financial arrangement in her profile.

    He's like, "That's ridiculous! NO ONE can do that. I told that young lady, 'tell you what, if you find someone who can offer you that, please let me know'. "

    I pointed out that there *are* men who can offer that kind of arrangement. Maybe not many in our city, but hedge fund kings in NYC can certainly do so. He remained dubious, and goes, "You know what *I* want? I want to be on a website to be a sugarbaby for the ex-wives of guys like that. I can offer to be their boytoy!".

    I had to keep from laughing, right there at the table. He sheepishly goes, "I probably wouldn't be what they were looking for though..."

    Yeah dude, I'm sure a former trophy wife of a Wall Street king is just DYING for a boytoy who is a short, unattractive man of 60 with an enormous gut, who also has a terrible attitude. Pffft!!!

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    I bet she didn't message him. He messaged her and said " you're asking for too much or no one can afford that". It's always the guy with "negotiable" that contacts you for $300. It's like umm if you can't do my allowance then why are you contacting me? They act like it's a flea market where they're going to "haggle"with you. "Ohh yeah I'll get her to drop her allowance. Wait until she meets me." I swear mirrors are cheap, why don't any of these guys seem to own at least one?

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Cheap guys haggle..
    Guys with money have more respect for what a woman declares she is worth.

    Also, many of the really decent guys have a minimum they will pay, because they want a woman who knows she's worth it. That goes for both sugarbabies and escorts.

    Btw, littlemiss.. I didn't start with an agency... And I think if someone wants to be independent, starting with an agency is not the way to go. You won't learn how to run your business and they aren't going to teach you because they aren't trying to set ladies up to be able to work on their own. All you do is wait for them to call you and go where they tell you. Being independent is a lot more involved and its something you learn by doing research, learning on the job and finding a mentor to help with questions and advice.

    There's a reason they take half your earnings... They are doing all the business work for you! Plus unless you end up with a very high class agency, the rate will be around 200-250 so your bring home is 100-125... And you still have to supply your own condoms, testing, clothes, etc and pay out your driver since most agencies require one. That's why it seems agency girls never really get ahead...
    Don't blink. Don't even blink. Blink and you're dead. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink!

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    I'm still wavering about giving it a go - some days I feel like I can do it, others not so much. The agencies around here seem to do a 60/40 split, in favor of the escort. That's still a lot, when I think about what exactly you have to do as an escort - like you said, I understand that money goes towards their administrative costs. It seems like they could "hold your hand" a bit if you're brand new, but maybe not. There are a couple of reputable agencies here in my city, but I've seen a few things here and there online that makes me think they're not as great as they seem.

    I'm probably not ready to take the plunge yet. I'm going to meet a few more of the potential SD guys who've asked me to dinner first.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Only do what you're comfortable with... No matter what anyone says (even me! Lol) whatever path you choose... Whether its Indi, agency or not at all. No matter how much one makes or who is there to guide you, if you don't feel good about it, then its not worth doing.
    Don't blink. Don't even blink. Blink and you're dead. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink!

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Hey everyone, thanks for all the opinions, thoughts, info, etc on this topic....I have read thru everyones posts & in my experience just from being on those couple sites for the last 2-3 months, its turns out I have WASTED a ton of my time with the fake-ass SD, or the SD who want to only pay an allowance of barely nuthing OR the ones who str8 up tell me they want to meet up and fuck for X amt.

    Anyways, today I got completely FED UP with both sites, even tho i "thought" i had 2 that were going somewhere, but 2 weeks has passed and neither bothered to email me back, even after we chatted and seemed to really click. As much as i'd LOVE to have a real SD/SB deal, and im ready to do that, those sites are JOKES! I deleted my accounts, and I'm done. I have no clue where to find the "real" SD, but I know I'm not wasting years weeding thru the trash men on those sites. I'm really disappointed, because I thought I'd have no problem after meeting a few of them, finding one that would work out well. The truth is, that I met (in person) NONE, and i got my hopes up only to be let down. I still want to be a SB really bad, so if anyone knows any other ways to find a true SD, please msg me and let me know. Those sites didn't work for me, and I don't want anymore sites to try.

    *sigh* who knows anymore....do any exist that we can meet just in our everyday lives? why do we have to meet all of them on fake-ass websites?

    Anyways, thanks for reading this & I have an odd feeling there are a bunch of girls in my spot also, that have had NO luck with those sites & just feel fed up. What shall we do girls???? *shrug*
    XoXo


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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Quote Originally Posted by ohiogirl26 View Post
    Hey everyone, thanks for all the opinions, thoughts, info, etc on this topic....I have read thru everyones posts & in my experience just from being on those couple sites for the last 2-3 months, its turns out I have WASTED a ton of my time with the fake-ass SD, or the SD who want to only pay an allowance of barely nuthing OR the ones who str8 up tell me they want to meet up and fuck for X amt. Anyways, today I got completely FED UP with both sites, even tho i "thought" i had 2 that were going somewhere, but 2 weeks has passed and neither bothered to email me back, even after we chatted and seemed to really click. As much as i'd LOVE to have a real SD/SB deal, and im ready to do that, those sites are JOKES! I deleted my accounts, and I'm done. I have no clue where to find the "real" SD, but I know I'm not wasting years weeding thru the trash men on those sites. I'm really disappointed, because I thought I'd have no problem after meeting a few of them, finding one that would work out well. The truth is, that I met (in person) NONE, and i got my hopes up only to be let down. I still want to be a SB really bad, so if anyone knows any other ways to find a true SD, please msg me and let me know. Those sites didn't work for me, and I don't want anymore sites to try. *sigh* who knows anymore....do any exist that we can meet just in our everyday lives? why do we have to meet all of them on fake-ass websites? Anyways, thanks for reading this & I have an odd feeling there are a bunch of girls in my spot also, that have had NO luck with those sites & just feel fed up. What shall we do girls???? *shrug*
    AngelCummings has a lot of info on freestyling to find a SD. Search for her multipage SD thread or PM her.
    Behind every bitch is a girl who got tired of being broken and used.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Blech, I didn't like tonight's potential SD. (So of course, he asked if I want to go out again) @@We went to a nice restaurant, but he rubbed me the wrong way. And he's one of those that I'm sure would have a heart attack if you asked him to bring some kind of gift to the first meeting to show he's serious. I'm pretty sure he doesn't do much until he's actually getting some. I sensed a major madonna/whore complex too. He talked about how he's dated all these strippers, this girl who had been an escort, but was now a sugarbaby, and how's he's not looking for a serious relationship since his divorce. Then he's like, "I'm on eharmony too, and the women on there want to immediately get serious". WTF? I'm like, dude, if you're looking for a sugarbaby, and you don't want to get serious w/anyone, you should probably stay off a dating site intended for people who want to get married asap.We were at dinner less than 10 minutes before he goes, "So. You're on SeekingArrangement.com". I'm like, "I don't think the couple over in the corner heard you. Could you say it a little louder". He's all like, "Well, I just want to know what you expect for me". Ugh, insert eyeroll here. I hate these guys who think you're going to see them live in person for all of five minutes, and then demand a certain amount of money, and let them be in the power position of either declining it, or trying to negotiate. Two other yo-yo's from the site called tonight too when I was getting ready to go to dinner. One was from out of town, and I had talked to him briefly on the phone before when he was here, and our schedules didn't match to get together. I was ok with that, because I didn't like that he seemed to think I should work around *his* schedule. He was boring and annoying on the phone, so I wasn't planning to see him if he called again anyway, and tonight he calls my phone five times in a row, rambling something about how "his colleague" cancelled dinner plans with him tonight, and maybe I want to meet him for dinner in a half hour". Yeah, keep waiting buddy!

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  26. #39
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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    loooool @ Could you say that a little louder! What a d***!! Ohh I'm so loving your story!! Please tell me what happened after he said the whole "expectations" speech. Wow he acts like he's holding all the cards. I wish you could record some of these conversations and load them up here. I did that with google voice but the stupid thing kept announcing " recording on". lol So the guys would get all squirrel-y- thinking I was an officer of the law! Haaa !!

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Also all that extra info he gave you was for ego boost purposes only. In other words " so many women want my ugly ass, don't you feel lucky to be out with me"? You can either fake it to make it or you can just move along. I almost want to go on there just to f*** with them.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Lets see, what did I say? I think I just blew it off, I said something like, I didn't bring my business plan with me, sorry. And he reiterated that he just likes to know what women expect.

    And yes, I think he was trying to make me feel like I was in the position of having to prove my worth in some way. I got up, went to the bathroom, looked at myself in the mirror. I'm like, wait a minute. I'm cute, he's not. He needs to change his 'tude. I came back to the bathroom and forced him to carry the conversational ball from there. That changed him in a hurry.

    No matter how many times I see it, it still shocks me how delusional men can be about themselves. All my "normal" boyfriends have been far more appealing and charismatic than any of these guys from the sugardaddy sites, yet these guys still seem to think that we're on the same level or that I'm attracted to them physically or something. How are men so oblivious about their own appeal?

    This was weird too - he talked about his teenaged son a little too much. At first I thought it was nice that he mentioned him in his emails a good bit, and clearly spent a lot of time w/him, but he kept going on and on about him, telling me that he's here every other weekend, (thanks for letting me know, are you worried I'm going to want to spend every weekend with you? I'm not even sure I want to sit through this entire meal with you), and he just didn't shut up about him. It's not something a normal person does, when meeting a member of the opposite sex for the first time. Most parents mention their child once or twice, but not half the entire date, plus every email. The kid's 16, not 6. He sounds like he almost smothers him.

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    Default Re: Another quick SUGARDADDY question..call him right away?

    Wow so he's going on about his 16 year old son? He's probably older than that maybe 18 or 19. He's feeling insecure that you would probably be interested in his son not him. I had one guy do the same , talking about his son that actually was older than me. It's a turn off to hear how much closer in age someone's offspring is. I don't like to deal with that reality and it really shouldn't be brought up constantly. Maybe I should sign back up even for a month. I think we need an SA thread just to post member names and id's of what guys are actually saying. It could help us avoid the same losers. Idk. Just thinking it may be alot of fun. I need to be careful with time and not spend too much time chatting on there. It appears to be way to time consuming and not in a great way.

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