Other dancers - please tell me if you feel same.... becasue of my experence dancing, money really doesn't impress me much anymore. That's not to say I don't WANT money, or even that I don't LIKE money, but throwing around cash just to be noticed....or doing 'high-end' things to try and flaunt your means....has no appeal to me what-so-ever. I mean...I like nice things and don't want to be a pauper all my life, and a successful man who does well is attractive to me. A man who brags on and on about how much he makes an hour is a total turn off. I know what real money looks like, I know what high-earners look like, and I know what comes along with it. I was surrounded by it for a long time while I was stripping, so now that I have a straight-job when people act obnoxious with their cash it's completely unimpressive to me. Often times what most people I know define as "rich" is no where near "rich" in my books.
Now for the little story....
So, I moved to a new town about 4 months ago. It's famous for having lots of very high paying entry-level jobs, and nearly 3/4ths of my old highschool class have also moved to this new town and are working in fairly high-paying positions. And good for them. I'm genuinely happy for them.
I have a straight job here also, but as I haven't been as long (the rest have been here about 3+ years) I don't have a super high paying position yet. I do well, I'm just not.....rolling in the dough. And that's fine for me. I'm happy with what I have and all my needs are met...and them some.
But I can't afford to go out and do the things my girlfriends do. Honestly, even if I DID have their money - I'd probably squirrel it away and not spend it anyway. My girlfriends and I were raised in a fairly poor area, so having the cash for non-essentials is a new and exciting concept. And I totally understand that and get that, and try to put my feelings aside when they do/say things to me that are.....irritating and rude.
But every time I try to get together with them to hang out, they want to do something well beyond my means. Just now, our 'girls movie night in' was cancelled - and replaced with a Spa Day on Tuesday. A spa day costing $440. Even when I was dancing, and making three times what I do now....I wouldn't spend $440 on a fucking spa package. And I'm certianly not going to spend that now. We were supposed to have a video game night - was replaced with going out and buying several bottles of wine. Another night we were going to go out and have a few drinks.....and they changed it without telling me - instead going to a pricey Seafood/Steak Buffet AND drinks..."No thanks ladies - I ate before I came. Becasue, y'know....we all agreed we would...?". Not dropping $100 on a plate of food I'm not hungry for. Call me cheap all you like. Kthx.
They KNOW I can't afford this shit. I straight up tell them now. "Oh that sounds fun, but it's too expensive for me. You go and have fun. We'll get together another time. XOXO". But ....Another time comes and they want to spend a considerable amount on something else.
It's not like they NEED things things. I've know these girls well. They're doing it for "bigness". They brag a lot about how much they make. They talk about buying only designer purses and sunglasses. They show off, basically. A lot. And it bothers me because....I never did.
When I was dancing (which they have no idea about) I was making TONS more cash than they could have dreamed of. But I never rubbed it in their face. Never told them their clothes were cheap. Never bragged on and on about my expensive manicures or dinners out or how I had a customer drop $600 on me last night in a CR and I already spent it all on new boots and a name-brand winter coat. Never said any of that. They had no idea. I kept it that way for a reason. Because I didn't want to be an obnoxious bitch....kinda like the ones they've turned into.
At first it was kinda funny to me, but now it's just irritating. I'm happy they're doing so well, and I hope they continue to succeed and do well for themselves. I just wish that they'd come back down to earth a little, and perhaps remember their other friends in 'low-places'. Not sure why they feel it's okay to show off like this. It doesn't suit them at all.
I've been slowly cutting them out of my life, and I think I'll continue to do so. I don't really want to be around people who talk about how awesome they are because of how much money they make. Or - conversely - treat other people like they're worth less because they earn less.
Posting this in Lounge rather than Life Support because Support isn't really needed. Empathy, maybe some similar funny stories from all of you, but support-wise I'm all good...and I feel better now that I've gotten all that out.
Anyone go through anything similar?



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