Results 1 to 23 of 23

Thread: All the ladies that were desperate....

  1. #1
    Newbie
    Joined
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default All the ladies that were desperate....

    Believe me, stripping is the last thing I thought I would ever do. Yes I have a couple friends that do it & honestly I look up to them. They have the confidence and the bodies (even after kids). Me on the other hand, I just graduated from a crappy college with a certificate I can't do shit with. I'm dating a police officer and I'm a single mom to a beautiful 2 year old little girl. How did you ladies do it? How did you all start?

  2. #2
    Featured Member sierra.'s Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2010
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    904
    Thanks
    1,484
    Thanked 1,166 Times in 427 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I wouldn't say that I was "desperate." I'd been laid off for my job and was on unemployment but it was about to run out. I wasn't having any luck finding another office job. My roommate at the time had worked as a stripper for a short time, and that sort of put the idea in my head.
    I originally had a very warped idea of what stripping was like (thanks to those anti-sex work websites), but found stripperweb which gave me a more accurate picture.

    I finally figured, hey, you're only young once. If I liked it then cool, if I hated it I never had to go back.

    I read the fuck out SW, order my heels and practiced dancing in the mirror for about a month before I went to the diviest bar in town (where my roommate did her stint) to audition.

    I've been doing it ever since then, a little over a year and a half.

  3. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to sierra. For This Useful Post:


  4. #3
    Moderator Miss_McKenna's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    1,892
    Thanks
    82
    Thanked 825 Times in 437 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Are you planning to tell your police officer bf? Because I dated a cop one time and there was NO WAY I could tell him, and eventually it came between us to where I broke up with him for fear he'd find out. He'd always tell me stories about how guys in his unit went there undercover to check if anything shady was going on, and how a lot of the girls were shady, and I was so scared someone'd recognize me and tell him. It would have been embarrassing for me and probably even more for him.


  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Miss_McKenna For This Useful Post:


  6. #4
    Senior Member NipzncOOkiez's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    165
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I'm just now coming back after 2 years of dancer "retirement." I honestly don't need to work, my husband does very well in his job but I enjoy it. I love meeting new people, being social, dancing, and being the center of attention. Never mind the smokin' hot body you get while dancing, I'd say that's a job perk. When I started years ago I felt a little weird, then I felt even more ashamed that I actually enjoyed it. I thought there was something wrong with me until I just started using my own brain and now allowing others to make my decisions for me on how I should feel. Hang in there girl, you'll be fine

  7. #5
    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2008
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    4,980
    Thanks
    621
    Thanked 6,894 Times in 2,672 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I definitely wasn't desperate. I was/am young and hot and decided to capitalize on it. I found this forum, looked up some info on my city, got lucky and met a local girl who gave me some local-specific tips and even some shoes and outfits, and went into the club and did it. Once you get off stage for the first time, you'll wonder why you thought it was such a big deal!

    In your case, you should probably deal with that police officer boyfriend of yours first though. Miss_McK brings up some really good points.

  8. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to shanna dior For This Useful Post:


  9. #6
    Newbie
    Joined
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Oh.....well if that's the case, I guess I won't dance. I'm not going to give up 1 of the most important people in my world just so I can dance. Thanks everyone!

  10. #7
    God/dess JayATee's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2008
    Location
    In your nightmares...
    Posts
    4,861
    Thanks
    1,334
    Thanked 2,291 Times in 1,133 Posts
    My Mood
    Devilish

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I wasn't desperate... I just hated my job, and once I found I could make more in a night than I could in a week at a straight job that was it for me.

    And frankly, the idea that we only got into the business because we were all desperate and had no other options is a gross dramatization. Most of us (on the site anyway) went to college, have degrees, retirement plans, 401ks etc.
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

    "If you're good at something, never do it for free." The Dark Knight

    "you conjunctively engender an intoxicating combination of wicked, wholesome & insanely intelligent" - a friend describing me


    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    ^^^ It's a penis, not a martini shaker.
    Blessed Be

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to JayATee For This Useful Post:


  12. #8
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I wasn't desperate at all. I was in college and figured it might be better than working 30 hours a week at my crappy retail minimum wage job and going to school. It was much better and while it did have many negative aspects it was how I was able to make the dean's list at school, have money for myself and spare time to study or spend with people

  13. #9
    Newbie
    Joined
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Well that's not my case. I went to college, but definitely didn't have a degree, retirement plan, or 401K. This is not my first choice. Believe me.... Although I used to be an extremely sexual person.....I don't know what happened. But I've come to the conclusion that since my boyfriend does live out of state....yes I am in a long distance relationship, and yes I do trust him. I have to dance. I have no other way to support myself and my daughter. Plus I'm saving to move up to DC which is where he lives and also the rest of my family aside from my parents. I won't have any money for at least another month, so I guess I'll use the rest of this remaining month to get in shape and practice dancing in the mirror. :/ I've asked my friends to help me out which was extremely embarrassing and neither of them was very helpful.... so I guess its up to me now. I'll have to learn the business for myself, like almost all you ladies did.

  14. #10
    God/dess JayATee's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2008
    Location
    In your nightmares...
    Posts
    4,861
    Thanks
    1,334
    Thanked 2,291 Times in 1,133 Posts
    My Mood
    Devilish

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Quote Originally Posted by Marina_xo View Post
    Well that's not my case. I went to college, but definitely didn't have a degree, retirement plan, or 401K. This is not my first choice. Believe me.... Although I used to be an extremely sexual person.....I don't know what happened. But I've come to the conclusion that since my boyfriend does live out of state....yes I am in a long distance relationship, and yes I do trust him. I have to dance. I have no other way to support myself and my daughter. Plus I'm saving to move up to DC which is where he lives and also the rest of my family aside from my parents. I won't have any money for at least another month, so I guess I'll use the rest of this remaining month to get in shape and practice dancing in the mirror. :/ I've asked my friends to help me out which was extremely embarrassing and neither of them was very helpful.... so I guess its up to me now. I'll have to learn the business for myself, like almost all you ladies did.
    It's not your first choice. Ok, so what is your first choice? Even a second or third choice? If you don't want to dance don't. It's a recipe for disaster. There are other jobs out there. There's absolutely no reason to force yourself to do something you don't want to do. On top of it, being sexual has literally nothing to do with this job. I don't want the customers. I certainly don't want to be sexual with them. It seems to me you might have a very warped idea of what this job is.
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

    "If you're good at something, never do it for free." The Dark Knight

    "you conjunctively engender an intoxicating combination of wicked, wholesome & insanely intelligent" - a friend describing me


    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    ^^^ It's a penis, not a martini shaker.
    Blessed Be

  15. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to JayATee For This Useful Post:


  16. #11
    Newbie
    Joined
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    It's not your first choice. Ok, so what is your first choice? Even a second or third choice? If you don't want to dance don't. It's a recipe for disaster. There are other jobs out there. There's absolutely no reason to force yourself to do something you don't want to do. On top of it, being sexual has literally nothing to do with this job. I don't want the customers. I certainly don't want to be sexual with them. It seems to me you might have a very warped idea of what this job is.

    OH YEAH i definitely understand! One of my friends sleeps with her customers, thats basically why she makes so much, and I'm definitely not doing that! But I don't feel sexy, whatsoever. But I have to build up my confidence, for some reason it hit an all time low this year and past couple months. My boyfriend even noticed a difference when I'm around him and usually he makes me feel absolutely beautiful. I feel like dancing will help my confidence boost and also help me to be more sociable. But as far as careers go, my first choice would be to be a medical assistant. What I actually went to school for. And I'm going back to soon to start on my Nursing degree. I wish I could get my foot in at a doctors office or in a hospital, but the way things are going now, that doesn't seem likely. And I've worked in retail most of my life, I'm not going back to minimum wage while I fold clothes all day. HELLLL NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! And actually I've been been a member of this site for about 3 years now. I just delete my old username because I though I was never going to dance again. And I actually bough my permit and dance for about a month. That was a bust.....I had no self confidence whatsoever and I was working day shift which is of course only regulars most of the time. Dancing to me isn't only about the "money" which is a big part of it. But it's about finding me. Building a name for myself and finally come out of my shell I call a life.

  17. #12
    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2008
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    4,980
    Thanks
    621
    Thanked 6,894 Times in 2,672 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Quote Originally Posted by Marina_xo View Post
    I feel like dancing will help my confidence boost and also help me to be more sociable.
    Dancing is not the industry to get into without any self esteem. You have management, fellow dancers, and customers who will be judging you and sometimes throwing negative comments your way. You need to have a thick skin to deal with it all, and a strip club is certainly not the place to build self confidence!

  18. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to shanna dior For This Useful Post:


  19. #13
    Newbie
    Joined
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Atlanta
    Posts
    6
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I'm still going to try it. But thanks!

  20. #14
    Moderator Miss_McKenna's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    1,892
    Thanks
    82
    Thanked 825 Times in 437 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Ah I didn't realize your boyfriend lives out of state... that would probably make it easier. I danced in the same town my boyfriend worked in, and I broke up with him because if I didn't it would have been inevitable that I would have ran into him or one of his squad guys at the club eventually. It sounds like you wouldn't have that problem though.

    I might be in the minority here, but dancing actually did help my self esteem. I had pretty low self esteem before I started dancing, and I was shy and not very good at being naked in front of people. It sounds like a recipe for disaster in a dancer, and maybe I was lucky that it worked out so well, but when I started dancing it was a huge boost for my self esteem to have guys want to pay $30 per song for dances, tip me just to hang out with them, tell me I was hot etc. I think dancing really gave me confidence and a "stick up for myself" attitude that I didn't have before.

    Marina, I was in South Carolina when I started dancing, PM me if you have any Q's about dancing in the south


  21. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Miss_McKenna For This Useful Post:


  22. #15
    God/dess JayATee's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2008
    Location
    In your nightmares...
    Posts
    4,861
    Thanks
    1,334
    Thanked 2,291 Times in 1,133 Posts
    My Mood
    Devilish

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Quote Originally Posted by shanna dior View Post
    Dancing is not the industry to get into without any self esteem. You have management, fellow dancers, and customers who will be judging you and sometimes throwing negative comments your way. You need to have a thick skin to deal with it all, and a strip club is certainly not the place to build self confidence!
    Exactly. Honestly, you'll get treated like shit. And seriously, you want to get into the sex industry to find yourself?? What do you think this will be? If you already have low self esteem this will just make it worse. The more you say here hon the more you're less and less of a good candidate for the industry. I'm sorry to say, someone with your personality type is just begging to get into nothing but trouble. But if you're hell bent on trying (which is what it sounds like) I'd suggest a juice bar so you're not tempted to drink on your shifts, keep your head down, make your money, and go home.
    Last edited by JayATee; 02-19-2012 at 09:01 AM.
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

    "If you're good at something, never do it for free." The Dark Knight

    "you conjunctively engender an intoxicating combination of wicked, wholesome & insanely intelligent" - a friend describing me


    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    ^^^ It's a penis, not a martini shaker.
    Blessed Be

  23. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to JayATee For This Useful Post:


  24. #16
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Enceladus
    Posts
    1,315
    Thanks
    1,145
    Thanked 1,567 Times in 673 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_McKenna View Post
    I might be in the minority here, but dancing actually did help my self esteem. I had pretty low self esteem before I started dancing, and I was shy and not very good at being naked in front of people. It sounds like a recipe for disaster in a dancer, and maybe I was lucky that it worked out so well, but when I started dancing it was a huge boost for my self esteem to have guys want to pay $30 per song for dances, tip me just to hang out with them, tell me I was hot etc. I think dancing really gave me confidence and a "stick up for myself" attitude that I didn't have before.
    Thanks for this! I have been wanting to respond, but didn't want to be the odd one out, lol. I believe stripping has helped me with my self esteem also, which was virtually non-existent pre-stripping. Maybe it doesn't help everyone out there, but it has really helped me tackle alot of my personal issues.

  25. The Following User Says Thank You to MyButter For This Useful Post:


  26. #17
    Featured Member GlitterBexie's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2009
    Location
    South Wales, UK
    Posts
    876
    Thanks
    180
    Thanked 453 Times in 206 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I didnt start because i was desperate, i started because i all my friends were still at university all over the country and i was bored stiff at weekends, because i like money, because i wanted to be able to provide for myself and save and my "real life job" was just about covering basics. And i needed a reason to justify buying 7 inch shoes (lol).

    Your friend is a prostitute not a stripper, sorry, but she is.

    You said you danced before but you didnt like it because you had no self confidence, nothing has changed in the industry, in fact, its probably got worse with the economy. And if you want to go into nursing then im sure its been mentioned here before on here that there are background checks which will bring up "exotic dancer" and potentially stop you from getting employment in your chosen field in the future?

    I think i can understand what you mean about being sociable and being less shy etc, but wouldnt it be better to go into something you actually WANT to do, cause it sounds like you dont want to go back to stripping, you just want to be able to get out and about a bit. Maybe joining a few classes at a gym or something? Doing pole fitness or burlesque classes Whilst studying for your nursing certificate. I hope you do get everything you want out of it and are able to fulfill your dreams, just make sure you're doing it for the right reasons.

    I just know i wouldnt want to be paying out house fee's, tips, the hidden cost of dancing (hair, make up, outfits etc) if it wasnt all about coming home with a butt load of money in my purse.

    Good luck in whatever you decide
    xx
    ''I love fake boobs''
    ''They're not fake! I grew them myself!''

  27. The Following User Says Thank You to GlitterBexie For This Useful Post:


  28. #18
    Moderator Miss_McKenna's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    1,892
    Thanks
    82
    Thanked 825 Times in 437 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    And if you want to go into nursing then im sure its been mentioned here before on here that there are background checks which will bring up "exotic dancer" and potentially stop you from getting employment in your chosen field in the future?
    OP, your location says you're in Atlanta, if that's the case then you will HAVE to have an exotic dancer license and Glitter is right, your future nursing employers will be able to see that you stripped. If you want to avoid this, you'll have to go elsewhere than Atl.


  29. The Following User Says Thank You to Miss_McKenna For This Useful Post:


  30. #19
    Veteran Member Su Su's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Ya mum
    Posts
    559
    Thanks
    101
    Thanked 339 Times in 149 Posts
    My Mood
    In Love

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I dreamt of stripping since I was 16. About 2 weeks after I hit 18 I started workin' it lol.
    I don't know what to do with my life at the moment, although I am studying.. Used to be a novelty for me to dance every week, now I have to, to pay off rent and school stuff sigh...

    Good luck Marina, if you ever consider dancing. Just like any jobs, you'll get your ups and down either with customers (not just at SCs) and with staff. You have to have some kind of confidence and also be mentally prepared.
    Cos you'll deal with different people every day, whether it's at a strip joint or at a normal job.

  31. #20
    God/dess carmen_b's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2007
    Location
    the mountains ....
    Posts
    14,201
    Thanks
    15,165
    Thanked 21,344 Times in 9,307 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I would explore other avenues to find yourself. But .... FUND it with dancing !

  32. #21
    Senior Member sexyscarlet's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Upstate NY
    Posts
    117
    Thanks
    78
    Thanked 57 Times in 35 Posts
    My Mood
    Goofy

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    I wish you all the best and hope that you get to join you SO in DC. It really is going to be hard to hide your dancing background from future employers. Have you considered making the move and stripping in DC for a little while until you find a job you like? If you could stay with someone for two weeks or so you could have enough for a security deposit and first month's rent more than likely. Maybe one of your family members or bf could let you stay at their place. Give thought to all the possibilities because you don't want something you do for a few months to affect what the rest of your life will be like. Good luck!!

  33. #22
    God/dess Jay12's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Hill country.
    Posts
    2,926
    Thanks
    1,653
    Thanked 1,896 Times in 955 Posts
    My Mood
    Stressed

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    DC is pretty decent when it comes to money; probably not as lucrative as Baltimore, but it sure beats Virginia.





  34. #23
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    246
    Thanks
    310
    Thanked 275 Times in 112 Posts

    Default Re: All the ladies that were desperate....

    Can you do an amateur night in your area you can try? You won't have to pay anything to work and you won't be committed to finishing a schedule. You should definitely go into a couple of clubs with a guy friend and sit and watch for a couple of hours at each place. Figure out what you're getting into first.

    I started with an amateur night. I had thought about how nice stripping would be when I was a teenager and working several jobs and living on my own. I wanted to leave my retail job at 10 and go strip all night, I thought they all opened at midnight or something lol. So when I moved out of state for college and was working shitty jobs and saw my college bill and decided I did not want to have that all on a loan it became super tempting. I did the amateur night right before Thanksgiving break because I was broke and didn't want to have to ask anyone for help. I believed all the stereotypes and was afraid of getting robbed or beat up but I ended up loving it and having so much fun. I thought it was funny and awesome that I can lie to these guys and tempt them with my body (it was no contact thank God.. would of sucked if I went to a brothel by accident) for money. Now I do it because I like a comfortable life where I don't have to worry about when the next paycheck comes and I am saving for a home and business.

    Oh, and I know a lot of dancers that date and are married to cops. It's really common around here. But yea it'd suck if he worked for the town the club was in and the town wanted it shut down. Or if the club caused a lot of stress with constant complaints, drugs, bringing in rough crowd, DUIs etc.

Similar Threads

  1. Ever been so desperate??
    By sunnyb in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 11-17-2010, 03:27 PM
  2. Desperate in LA
    By Sad Sally in forum Club Chat
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 09-27-2009, 12:44 PM
  3. desperate times call for desperate measures
    By cashing in in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 04-06-2009, 02:18 AM
  4. Im Desperate!
    By BrunetteGoddess in forum Body Business
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 09-16-2006, 02:13 AM
  5. because I'm desperate for $$$$
    By Mamita in forum Newbie Board
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 11-20-2005, 01:55 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •