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Thread: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

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    Default Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Last weekend a couple of friends and I went to a strip club for the first time since one finally opened in our area. It was near the end of the night and there weren't many other people there. The other guys sitting at the main stage were a really chubby white guy with an afro and a middle-aged fat guy who liked to wad his dollars into balls and throw them at the dancers' asses. Anyway these guys spent at least $20 on each dancer during her set--usually by throwing money at her or laying it on the stage to get her to come their way. My friends and I weren't tipping nearly as much money and would just wait for the dancer to come over to us before giving her our money instead of throwing it at her like the other guys. Anyway, the dancers were crawling all over us and hardly any of them would get within two feet of those other dudes. Just curious what we were doing right and what they were doing wrong exactly? It would be nice to think that looking and acting like a gentleman was the main reason for the all the attention we got despite not throwing the most money around.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Not tipping dancers on stage at a stripclub or compensating them for crawling all over you is acting like a gentleman? Sounds like you all collectively tipped under $20 while burning holes in your seats. Not sure why itd be nice to think 'looking and acting like gentlemen but not paying' was why you got attention if youre in a stripclub... go to a danceclub if that is what you all collectively needed?

    They probably assumed youd buy dances. Didnt sound like you did... sometimes sales pitches fail. I doubt they crawled all over you for as long as your memory is making it seem. You also probably didnt watch what the dudes off to the side or the dancers did with them the whole night to make an assessment that had to do with you all being awesome.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by Arizona Punk View Post
    Last weekend a couple of friends and I went to a strip club for the first time since one finally opened in our area. It was near the end of the night and there weren't many other people there. The other guys sitting at the main stage were a really chubby white guy with an afro and a middle-aged fat guy who liked to wad his dollars into balls and throw them at the dancers' asses. Anyway these guys spent at least $20 on each dancer during her set--usually by throwing money at her or laying it on the stage to get her to come their way. My friends and I weren't tipping nearly as much money and would just wait for the dancer to come over to us before giving her our money instead of throwing it at her like the other guys. Anyway, the dancers were crawling all over us and hardly any of them would get within two feet of those other dudes. Just curious what we were doing right and what they were doing wrong exactly? It would be nice to think that looking and acting like a gentleman was the main reason for the all the attention we got despite not throwing the most money around.
    If they were wadding them up and throwing them at their asses, that was probably the primary reason they avoided them. Were the customers making snide comments and such also?
    You pretty much answered your own question. Yes, acting like a gentleman helps. Of course you still have to spend at least some money. Since you did both, they went to you instead of the assholes.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    @roast: I mean we didn't tip $20 individually. We did collectively, and yes, we bought dances later. Not to start a fight, but you're doing a lot of assuming there. My original post wasn't intended to sound like bragging--I was just surprised that the guys literally throwing money at the stage weren't getting as intense of a show as we were.

    @socialreject: I didn't hear any snide remarks, but I also could barely hear my friend sitting right next to me since the music was up so loud. Since I am a club rookie still, what is the typically appropriate amount to spend on a dancer while she is on stage. I don't know about other places, but it seems like each girl would be up there for 5-8 minutes, and my friends and I each tipped around $10 for each one.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    From my perspective, I'd rather pay attention to the guys that weren't being jerks than the ones balling money up and throwing it at me. Sometimes I'll play with that type if they're the only ones on my rail, but usually I all but ignore them. Also - unfolding folded/wadded bills up at the end of the night is fucking obnoxious. It takes FOREVER.

    $10 a set per girl is fine by me.
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    Hahahaha @ bringonthemen. Too true. So funny.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Meh, I don't care how money is thrown as long as it's thrown. It is obnoxious to unball, but I'd rather have to do that than not have anything to count at all. If you're not tipping get the fuck away from my stage. If you make me come to you because you're too much of a pompous ass to throw money at the girl WORKING on stage, then I'm too much of a lazy bitch to come take it from you. Save your dollars boy, you apparently need them more than I.
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    To the OP: I tried to be nice about it, because I knew you would get blasted by these dancers. Hopefully you won't get insulted too much and never come back? You did after all tip at the rail, even if a bit less than those "assholes"

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by socialreject View Post
    If they were wadding them up and throwing them at their asses, that was probably the primary reason they avoided them. Were the customers making snide comments and such also?
    You pretty much answered your own question. Yes, acting like a gentleman helps. Of course you still have to spend at least some money. Since you did both, they went to you instead of the assholes.
    Quote Originally Posted by socialreject View Post
    To the OP: I tried to be nice about it, because I knew you would get blasted by these dancers. Hopefully you won't get insulted too much and never come back? You did after all tip at the rail...
    Riiiiiiiight.... except that the OP doesn't realize he fell into the asshole category himself. And neither do you because you're not a dancer.
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    Riiiiiiiight.... except that the OP doesn't realize he fell into the asshole category himself. And neither do you because you're not a dancer.
    Hey, he was tipping. That is the one little nugget of info that you apparently don't acknowledge. I have a great idea: next time he goes, he can try to shove the money down the dancer's throat. Sure, he might get thrown out by the bouncers, but at least he will be secure in the knowledge that the dancer got tipped.
    To the OP: Please continue to act like a gentleman and tip at the rail. And if you see a dancer you like, please politely invite her over to your table and buy a few dances from her. You will have a great time and so will the dancers

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by socialreject View Post
    Hey, he was tipping. That is the one little nugget of info that you apparently don't acknowledge.
    It was acknowledged, and rejected as an excuse for the behaviour.
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    It was acknowledged, and rejected as an excuse for the behaviour.
    What behavior would that be? Standing at the rail and tipping when a dancer came up to him? What is wrong with that again? I hate to break it to you, but nobody forced the dancer to "crawl all over him". Tipping 10 bucks at the rail is fine, as one dancer surprisingly admitted. Maybe he made a mistake coming to this forum and posting his question, because he wasn't talking big VIP spending. God forbid he would be wasting your precious time.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by Arizona Punk View Post
    Last weekend a couple of friends and I went to a strip club for the first time since one finally opened in our area. It was near the end of the night and there weren't many other people there. The other guys sitting at the main stage were a really chubby white guy with an afro and a middle-aged fat guy who liked to wad his dollars into balls and throw them at the dancers' asses. Anyway these guys spent at least $20 on each dancer during her set--usually by throwing money at her or laying it on the stage to get her to come their way. My friends and I weren't tipping nearly as much money and would just wait for the dancer to come over to us before giving her our money instead of throwing it at her like the other guys. Anyway, the dancers were crawling all over us and hardly any of them would get within two feet of those other dudes. Just curious what we were doing right and what they were doing wrong exactly? It would be nice to think that looking and acting like a gentleman was the main reason for the all the attention we got despite not throwing the most money around.
    They were probably pissed that they had to waste so much time un-wadding those bills. The right way to tip on stage is to make it rain. Just go to the bar and change in a huna for a stack then...


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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    999 times out of 1000, the fat, middle aged slob with a wad in his pocket is going to get more attention than the young, respectful guy with leaner finances, especially if the slob is a known spender. Most of these girls are in their clubs to make money, not friends. Your kindness will not pay their rents, nor will it put food on their tables.



    Oh crap! Rick, I was trying to use the quote function and hit edit by mistake. Please accept My sincere apologies for this. It was a great post! Please feel free to try and re-post if you can. sorry


    LOL Yoda, no problem - this stuff happens. I don't think that I could recreate it without expending more effort than it is probably worth at this point. I have no doubt though that, soon enough, another new poster will give me another bite at the apple.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 04-12-2012 at 03:13 PM.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    ^ Yes, I noticed this, too.

    SR, what you missed was the OP describing the other customers as "a really chubby white guy with an afro and a middle-aged fat guy," and then himself as "looking and acting like a gentleman."

    It's always about how the new guy thinks he looks.

    He doesn't yet see that none of the dancers give a shit what he looks like. At all.

    I think Rick did a nice job with the internal mental dialogue. It's a newbie mistake, so he's getting grilled a bit.

    Everybody has to start out somewhere.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by All Good Things View Post
    ^ Yes, I noticed this, too.

    SR, what you missed was the OP describing the other customers as "a really chubby white guy with an afro and a middle-aged fat guy," and then himself as "looking and acting like a gentleman."

    It's always about how the new guy thinks he looks.

    He doesn't yet see that none of the dancers give a shit what he looks like. At all.

    I think Rick did a nice job with the internal mental dialogue. It's a newbie mistake, so he's getting grilled a bit.

    Everybody has to start out somewhere.
    If he wants to think he looks good, then let him. That's what the dancers are there for, to make a customer feel good. As long as he is paying, then who gives a shit whether he thinks he looks good or not?

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by socialreject View Post
    If he wants to think he looks good, then let him. That's what the dancers are there for, to make a customer feel good. As long as he is paying, then who gives a shit whether he thinks he looks good or not?
    You're still not getting it. This isn't a hey he was tipping so he should be left alone here thing. You'd do well to read and comprehend what all the veteran dancers and customers alike are saying so you don't become the asshole ITC yourself.

    And, the "I look better than the fatass who is spending money" will then turn into a "I don't have to pay for it because I'm so awesome you should just want to spend your time with me regardless" attitude which isn't appreciated either.
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by Arizona Punk View Post
    @roast: I mean we didn't tip $20 individually. We did collectively, and yes, we bought dances later. Not to start a fight, but you're doing a lot of assuming there. My original post wasn't intended to sound like bragging--I was just surprised that the guys literally throwing money at the stage weren't getting as intense of a show as we were.
    If she is "assuming" it's because the story you related in your original post was incomplete. In fact, you left out the most important detail-you and your friends were buying dances! Stage tipping is only a small part of most dancer's income but it is often a big part of their pitch to get private dances out of you. You guys were fresh meet. Fresh meet gets attention. If you buy dances you will continue to get attention. You guys bough dances, the attention you got at the stage worked. It's quite possible that the guys getting less attention had already been approached by the ladies earlier and had turned down requests for dances from the ladies.

    FYI, I'm a middle aged fat guy, I buy lots of dances, I get lots of attention...
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by socialreject View Post
    This response has a touch of class that is severely lacking in the dancers' responses. For Christs sake, it's not as if he went up to the stage and demanded she go back to the table with him (for the promise of buying dances) and then waste her time, all without spending money. He spent stage-tip money, and he got stage-tip attention.
    SR, his posts touched upon two different issues that are often live wires for dancers by: 1. opining that perhaps how he looked and acted was more important to dancers than how much he gives to them; and 2. implying that he and his friends made the girls work for their money.

    Now perhaps he was unaware of the heat he was about to draw, but when a customer posts his opinions on a dancer support site, he either needs to know what he is talking about or have a thick skin. Remember that this is their support site and we are simply guests here. Before you get emotionally charged up over how dancers respond here in pink, keep in mind that, while this is entertainment for us, it is their livelihood. It is understandable that they might become a little worked up over practices and beliefs that impact how they earn a living.

    Just something to think about.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    Opining
    Mmmm.... scrabble word. And even used properly!!!
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    Now perhaps he was unaware of the heat he was about to draw, but when a customer posts his opinions on a dancer support site, he either needs to know what he is talking about or have a thick skin. Remember that this is their support site and we are simply guests here. Before you get emotionally charged up over how dancers respond here in pink, keep in mind that, while this is entertainment for us, it is their livelihood. It is understandable that they might become a little worked up over practices and beliefs that impact how they earn a living.
    'zactly...

    New male visitors to this site often think that they are logging on to just another strip club board. That's really not what Stripperweb is about. This site is about and exists for dancers. Customers can obviously participate on some areas of the site but the ladies here don't pull any punches. As rick said, this is about their livelihood. That is much more important to them than the egos of males who show up here. The guys that last on SW figure that out and appreciate the honesty. The ones that don't either get bored or banned...whichever comes first...
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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Well, as for myself, I've always made sure I have at least enough money for a half an hour in VIP before I go, as well as smell nice (take a shower), wear clean clothes, etc. I place equal importance on both aspects (money and hygiene) of being a customer. If both of those requirements are not met, then I don't go to my club. I can see how this is an important topic of discussion in that the OP might learn, through dancers' unpaid attentions, that he no longer has to pay for said attention. But he said he bought dances later, and if that is true, then I am even more convinced that he did absolutely nothing wrong, just being a customer.
    Last edited by socialreject; 04-12-2012 at 07:36 PM.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    So what is the appropriate way to tip while sitting at the stage? We just held a few dollars out in our hands, the girl would come over and do her thing to each of us, and then held her g-string open to slip the money in. Like I said, it was our very first time in a club and it seemed like the most logical way of doing things. If that's wrong, what is the right way of going about it?

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    Thanks.

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    Default Re: Appearance/Attitude > Money?

    oops.. double posted.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



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