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Thread: When a guy wants to wait...

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    Default When a guy wants to wait...

    And I mean, he really does want to buy dances, he's just not ready yet. Not bullshitting.
    What do you do? I really don't want to spend 20+ minutes conversing with him, unless it's extremely slow. And when I've tried to excuse myself politely, to come back later, they end up leaving, and I lose a sale.
    Help?

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    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    time is money. dont sit and wait for him, besides the longer you sit and talk to him- for free- the less your value gets. (not you as a person but as a stripper sales woman) men need to be reminded over and over again that 'we mean business' and not looking for a friend.

    losing a sale over this is not so bad, there are plenty fish in the sea. besides, its just a dance- not a VIP.

    for example---

    a real estate agent is trying to sell a million dollar home to a couple. they love the house but not ready to buy the house. so does the real estate agent,

    a. sell to someone else who IS ready

    or

    b. let them live inside the home for free until they are ready?

    in this business, we deal with gains and losses on a daily basis. what if some guy walks in who would love a VIP or spend tons on you, walks in but you were distracted by the guy who is not ready for any dances? it all goes back to the gains/loss thing.


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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    If he says 'maybe later' and leaves without buying any dances, he was bullshitting and was never going to be ready. Usually when I hear 'maybe later', I'll do like you did: politely excuse myself with a promise to return or invitation for him to come get me when he's ready to have some real fun. Some customers just come into the club with no intention of spending because they know they can get some free company as girls try to hustle them. The longer you dance, the better you'll be at spotting them.

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    Featured Member miss1dancypants's Avatar
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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    usually they are bullshitting, but sometimes they are not.

    i will ask them, "ok, when would you like me to come back over to come grab you for some dances?" if he says in x amount of time, go back in x amount of time and say something like "ok, ready to get me naked now? " half the time they will say yes because they dont want to look like the loser who didn't keep their word.

    in any event, don't waste your time to just HOPE that eventually they will be ready. even if they DO want dances at a later time, if you sit with them for free for 20 minutes, what gives them any incentive to pay? they just got to hang out with you for FREE!

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Thanks, you guys are right.
    I work at a very slow club, and generally I know which guys are going to spend or not, since we have a lot of regulars. But they feel really entitled to a girl's company. So if I leave them by themselves they feel "insulted". It's a really annoying attitude.

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    insulted that theyre not getting what they want for free?

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    Senior Member lovely1021's Avatar
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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Alot of custies get into this entitlement zone but you have to set the pace & ground rules of this faux relationship. I usually stay for one drink. Afterwards I find someway to excuse myself. if he acts as if he doesn't want me to leave I kindly remind him that I would love to hang out with him & if dancing is not on the agenda he could "take care of me" (holding out my garter) in the mean time. You have to be careful with this..if the first tip isn't up to par stay for a 1/2 song & excuse yourself...dont worry if he wants you he now grasps the concept and will act accordingly. Then come back around as you would for any other custie that says "later"

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    when a man wants you, he wants you now. wtf is maybe later? what- do you have to warm up your lap for me or something? if a man is interested, he is interested.

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    It's not really a maybe later, as I don't waste time with those. It's a pretty definite later. Again, I work at a slow club - many girls are lazy or outright dumb, and spend way too much time with customers, especially the regular guys.
    And they do feel insulted if I leave. I guess, because we girls KNOW they will spend, they feel like they deserve way too much free company, and mileage for that matter. If we don't spend enough time with him, he feels like we're just in it for the money. Retards.

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Quote Originally Posted by JoJoX View Post
    when a man wants you, he wants you now. wtf is maybe later? what- do you have to warm up your lap for me or something? if a man is interested, he is interested.
    And this applies to relationships outside of the club with boyfriend/exes/husbands too- If they want you they are not going to wait. Leave the Maybe laters sitting alone to get bored and watch other couples going off to have fun and watch them turn! and if they still say matbe later- hes not that into you..
    Tiny tweaks----->BIG CHANGES

    Quote Originally Posted by Kirakonstantin View Post
    More fear-mongering? Really? Yes, this is not the 1990's anymore. Yes, things are changing. Either dance or don't. Freaking out and sowing fear isn't going to help anyone.




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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Just ask him later - if you have time and he's around.

    Sometimes NO or MAYBE LATER is a blessing in disquise.

    A customer once told me to come back later, and some other dude with $700 snatched me up.




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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    First you say this:
    Quote Originally Posted by snowcake View Post
    And when I've tried to excuse myself politely, to come back later, they end up leaving, and I lose a sale.
    And then you say this:

    Quote Originally Posted by snowcake View Post
    It's not really a maybe later, as I don't waste time with those. It's a pretty definite later. Again, I work at a slow club - many girls are lazy or outright dumb, and spend way too much time with customers, especially the regular guys.
    And they do feel insulted if I leave. I guess, because we girls KNOW they will spend, they feel like they deserve way too much free company, and mileage for that matter. If we don't spend enough time with him, he feels like we're just in it for the money. Retards.
    If the customer leaves without spending, he did not intend to spend and was just saying '(maybe) later' as a way to deflect the question and keep you around for free as long as possible. I generally treat that as a no, with the caveat of returning if nothing better has cropped up in a while later.

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    I still remember.. a couple of years ago a customer came in and I said hello, asked him his name, etc. and then asked him if he would like a dance. He said, "Maybe later." To me that meant, "No." So I left him and went back to working the crowd. Later on his panties were in a bind because I never came back to him and then he boasted how he had to give some other girl several dances that would have been mine if I had done like I should and come back to him.

    The simple truth is that some guys have dogs just do they can kick them. Some guys have wives for the same reason and some guys come into strip clubs to take a big stinky poop on a girl because the only way they can feel good about themselves is by crapping on someone else.

    Fuck him and all the other guys like him. No regrets, make your money and if some guy says maybe later and you have nothing else to do then maybe ask him again later (nothing wrong with that) but don't invest anything into him at all. Keep hustling, keep moving, say hello to someone else, ask them their name, make some small talk and find a creative way to get them in the private dance room. Never look back, always look forward, and guy who tried to make me feel bad for not coming back to you... keep your misery, it's yours and you aren't going to pawn it off on me. I just feel sorry for you that you are such a douche bag.

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    Veteran Member missykrissy's Avatar
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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Snowcake
    I used to work a club, a looong time ago, with the worst customers and girls. Girls would sit for hours with guys just because "he buys me drinks and tips me onstage"
    Really! camping out at a table for stage tips!
    These same girls would complain about making less than 100/day. So stupid.
    I only worked there I think 2 months. I was scared I would never get hired anywhere else but I was wrong.

    Anyway....my only advice is, if they say they want a dance later, tell them that's perfect because you need to go talk to someone. Then say you'll be back in 20 minutes or whatever.
    If a guy is gonna blow you off because you won't sit with him for 30 minutes for one dance, forget it.
    good luck

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Dont focus on them when they say maybe later, but do check up later on if there is no one else to talk to.
    Last edited by Kisca; 11-18-2012 at 08:37 AM.

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Quote Originally Posted by missykrissy View Post
    Snowcake
    I used to work a club, a looong time ago, with the worst customers and girls. Girls would sit for hours with guys just because "he buys me drinks and tips me onstage"
    Really! camping out at a table for stage tips!
    These same girls would complain about making less than 100/day. So stupid.
    I only worked there I think 2 months. I was scared I would never get hired anywhere else but I was wrong.

    Anyway....my only advice is, if they say they want a dance later, tell them that's perfect because you need to go talk to someone. Then say you'll be back in 20 minutes or whatever.
    If a guy is gonna blow you off because you won't sit with him for 30 minutes for one dance, forget it.
    good luck
    Hah, yeah, that's half the girls at my clubs. That's why they expect it, and they end up buying like... 1 dance? Jeez.

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    i just smile and say,. "okay well let me know and come back to me - i cant wait! ill be thinkin bout it.." the ones that were serious will come back. usually i notice when guys say "maybe later" its jus a polite way of saying "no i dont wanna spend money"
    [True Passion Demands Respect]
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    Money Makes Me Horny

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    Quote Originally Posted by JoJoX View Post
    what if some guy walks in who would love a VIP or spend tons on you, walks in but you were distracted by the guy who is not ready for any dances? it all goes back to the gains/loss thing.
    You couldn't have said it better, so true!!

    & OP, it happens all the time. You really can't get everyone you approach to buy a dance. Forget it and move along

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    Default Re: When a guy wants to wait...

    My response to a maybe later that sounds like it might be sincere is to smile and say, "OK, sweetie, I've really enjoyed my time with you but I have to get back to work now and go make my rounds. I'll swing back by if I get a chance but if I'm not busy and you're ready you just let me know, because I would really love to dance with you." I say it every time, pretty much the same way, because it conveys the following things: I'm here to work and make money; my time is valuable; and I'm a desirable commodity that someone else just might snatch up if they wait too long. It also conveys these things in a nice way. I do try to swing back by depending on the vibe I got from the guy, and give him a second chance, but I keep it quick and ask him if he's been having fun since I left and is he ready to go have some fun/play with me/whatever now. If he says no, I tell him I hope he enjoys his night and don't bother to go back. But believe it or not, quite often they will come and find me.

    If guys consistently expected me to spend twenty or more minutes with them without tipping me for my time or buying a ton of dances, I would get the hell out of there. I don't have the patience to sit with most customers that long. After about five minutes of conversation I zone out and they all start sounding like the adults on Charlie Brown to me.

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