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Thread: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

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    Senior Member stripperbabychu's Avatar
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    Default Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    I have been clean of drugs for a while now. When I was on drugs or drinking (in my state it is illegal for anyone to drink at work) I did great talking to customers. I'm still a baby stripper of 4 months. Now that I'm clean, I find that I miss out on a lot of money when I am too shy or nervous to talk to anyone. When I work out of town there is so much potential to make money but I get too nervous to stop and talk to anyone. My current town is full of stingy (or literally broke) customers so you HAVE to hustle. Will my nervousness eventually fade? I have social anxiety which is hard. I noticed a lot of other new dancers get nervous too.

    Anyone have tips on how I can overcome my nerves and begin to talk to everyone more? And anyone have simple hustles that may help for a newish dancer?
    Aina Sinclair

    (was) stripper at Sharky's Cabaret, cam model on MFC, follow me on twitter @idolcomputer

    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette View Post
    I don't plan on ever having a "real job" again. Some people may find my plan objectionable because it's not the "normal" path to take, but guess what.. not everyone WANTS to take the normal path.

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    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    I know this isn't always the solution but I hate talking to customers too. I have a huge pair of 34F fake tits that talk for me. Another poster said that if you're going to be in this game for a year or more consider investing in a pair of fake ones if you don't have ones already. They pay for themselves 10x over. However you do need to get over your fear and gain confidence. Fake tits only carry you so far, but they do help.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    I'm shy also, I still have problems with this sometimes. I think for me I just kind of realized that if I don't go make money, well, I won't make any money. Don't let yourself hesitate; when you see a guy you can approach just do it. Even doing a quick hustle is better than nothing. After a while it gets easier. And for me, once I start approaching guys at the beginning of my shift, I start getting in the swing of things and it becomes easy. Sometimes it's just getting yourself to talk to those first couple customers at the start of your shift.

    And honestly, whats the worst he can say? No? I mean, he might say something mean but he probably won't, and even if he does who cares? You might be feeling anxious beforehand, but try and think about after. Even if he says no, is it going to matter tomorrow? 15 minutes from now? By the time you move on to the next guy? No, it won't.

    Sometimes thinking like that helps me. I also do the "try and get as many 'no's as possible" game and "ask every guy between me and the dressing room and until I get through them all and then I can take a break".

    hot flirting tips 2k13: tell him, “I’m not like other girls,” then pull down the secret zipper at the back of your neck to reveal your true reptilian form


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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    Quote Originally Posted by sierra. View Post
    I think for me I just kind of realized that if I don't go make money, well, I won't make any money.
    This this this this this. Do you pay a house fee to work? That's an even greater motivation to approach the first few customers and make it back, because no one wants to be working in a job where they walk out owing money.

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    Thumbs up Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    Quote Originally Posted by BringOnTheMen View Post
    Stop focusing on "hustling" guys and focus on having a good time both by yourself (as in, have a big smile on your face whenever you're on stage, walking around, etc) and when you're with a guy. There is no magic formula to "hustling" guys, you are much better off talking about whatever is easiest to talk about for a few minutes and then just say "ok let's go do a dance now!"
    THIS!
    Also, a tad off topic but, seriously, i cant stress enough how much smiling helps. I see so many beautiful sweet girls that come off as complete bitches bc they to hard to be "sexy" and just never smile. SMILING IS SEXY.

    But anyway, back to the topic on hand.... Im pretty shy too when im not drinking, What helps me is making sure im in a great mood before work, taking a while to get ready, listen to music and dance around my bathroom. I NEVER get ready in the dressing room, just do a quick touch up when i get there and then hit the floor. Know that you're sexy and every guy in the club came in knowing you'll be wanting to make money- and whatever guy you're taking to is lucky you chose him!

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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    Thanks so much, great posts here!!!

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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    First off, congratulations on getting clean. Shit's hard, but it's worth it in the long run. It's definitely something to be proud of, especially since you've been able to do it while working in a club environment. I think that drugs and drinking are a very tempting mask for people with anxiety issues. Getting clean when you've been using substances to cope is made all the more difficult since your body goes through an adjustment period that often causes feelings of anxiety.

    I have anxiety so bad that I have to schedule in an extra 15-30 minutes to talk myself out of vomiting before I do anything remotely social/stressful. Fun stuff! One weird thing I've found that helps is watching movies/interviews with women you find extremely sexy and confident. I love the shit out of Marilyn Monroe and Angelina Jolie, for example. I think they've got a whole lot of dark and crazy in them and it allows me to relate. However, they're also sex icons. There's an interview with Angelina on YouTube (from Inside the Actor's Studio, I think) and some audience member asks her about how she manages to have love scenes and share that part of herself with the other actor and the crew. She said that using physicality to express emotions is easy, that she just had to find something about that person or something in her mind that she could focus on, then just allow it to take over, basically. This isn't as easy when you're dealing with some potential sleazy asshole at a strip club, but I guess what my advice comes down to is channeling someone else. Become a different person and let that persona be your shield instead drugs/alcohol. Going through the process of putting on makeup and doing my hair helps to me get in that state of mind. It's like a transformation or some shit, and you're not yourself till you come back home and shower it all away.

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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    Great, great, great advice in here!
    Like someone said, sometimes making a game out of it makes things easier. Then you don't take any rejection quite so seriously. There's no need to worry about having long convos either. Try to make a sale within 3 songs. Just do the usual routine.. "Hi! I'm (insert name), and how are you this fine evening?! Great! Have you been here before? (Yes) You must've enjoyed yourself then since you came back for more (flirty wink). Soo do you remember how things work around here? (Yes) Well then, why don't you and I head upstairs and play... (lower your voice a few octaves when you say this and nod your head while rubbing his thigh or arm) If he says no, I'm ok for now, tell him you'll be back to check on him. (Smile) Always leave in a positive way.

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    Default Re: Way too shy and nervous to make money?

    Also, I tell all newbs here to go and read Hustle Hut. Shit, I still read it now and again to get a refresher. So much good advice and an answer to every question, insult and situation you can dream of! Good luck!

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