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Thread: Is this a "SD" ..?

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    Featured Member Girl Anachronism's Avatar
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    Default Is this a "SD" ..?

    Delete.
    Last edited by Girl Anachronism; 05-12-2012 at 02:11 PM.

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    Featured Member Spinnerette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Yes, this is a SD. I think the terms have already been established as the behavior is pretty squarely in that area. No need to label it verbally if (ridiculously, because that's what he's behaving as) he's uncomfortable with being referred to as such. And yes, letting him know (subtly, if that's what you're comfortable with, but leave no room for misinterpretation. sounds like you have a good line in your arsenal already) that you expect to be paid for your time is key.

    The line about still being married because of money/for the children's sake is the oldest one in the book. I hear that one all the time. Truth is if he wanted to leave, he would. No question about it. Therefore, pursuing a relationship on any other terms besides the ones that have already been formed would be a useless endeavor. I would say hold out on the sex because it seems he's enjoying the chase at the moment, the mystery. There is no set amount of time o do this, but I would suggest that if you can have your cake and eat it too, you should get as much money as you can before going that route.

    Getting the car registered in your name is just something you have to insist upon. There should not be any convincing that goes into this part. It is a gift and should therefore be legally yours. If he turns you down on that requirement, don't accept the car.

    This is just my intermediate advice (I still have many lessons to learn), but I hope it helps!

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    God/dess cherryblossomsinspring's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    I have to say that it's pretty dirty that he didn't tell you his married. He probably knew that you wouldn't have given him the time if you knew. So based on that , honesty isn't strong with this one. Leave it to just kissing. Since he seems to be calling the shots on how things have gone on up until this point just enjoy his company but don't sleep with him.

    Ohh the apartment thing sounds nice but I agree with you that it's probably a bad idea. Sounds like he's looking for some place to have sex with you and this would ultimately give him that place. So pass on that and just enjoy the cash and gifts.

    Even though you may feel your car is crapola it's still yours. What he sounds like he's going to give you will have major strings attached. So in his name so that when you don't play ball he can take it from you. So yeah I would just ask innocently and say wow a brand new car in my name how cool! When he goes to say well it's not.... then ask him why? This will be putting him on the spot for why he's giving you something that in essence isn't really yours. If he tries to brush it off with an excuse then you'll get a small view into his ultimate goal.

    So play dumb that you don't know he's married. Drag it out as long as possible. If he starts pushing for sex too aggressively then you may want to get out of dodge at that point or give him a nice excuse. You can even say you're saving yourself for you next husband! lol If at that point if it gets too ugly and he starts pushing more then well you can hit him with the how about next time routine. He'll eventually be back in the club trying to figure out where things went wrong. When you know he will not spend another dime on you then that's when you can slip him the "but you're married right"?

    If he returns with yeah but we don't blah blah etc whatever just tell him well have your wife come to the club with her blessings. lol. I doubt that will happen, so he'll have to find someone else.

    It sounds like an SD since many are married but he could also be a gift daddy. Just remember don't sleep with him , no matter how nice he is or how he appears to be such a great catch. Remember he's cheating on his wife and he didn't even tell you he was married. <---As long as you keep that in mind you'll maintain some distance from getting emotionally attached.

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    Featured Member Girl Anachronism's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Deleted
    Last edited by Girl Anachronism; 05-12-2012 at 02:11 PM.

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    As a man honestly in the same position he claims...it isnt impossible. Everything people are suggesting here is dead on. Keep it p4p.

    For me, as i told my fav, there may be a time i meet someone and am willing to go through the pain and financial loss of a divorce (as one character on HOUSE put it ' explaining to my young daughter why her and mommy werent enough love for me')...but until then my wife and i have an understanding. Some things are ok, some are not, and those lines we know and others just need to accept or not.

    It sux, but if the world didnt suck we would all fall off

    You may be his island of sanity and smiles. Or hes a lying prick. I go with door 1...because he took a BIG chance telling you.

    Dont push, but dont give more than you would any p4p customer...

    I enjoy clubs BECAUSE im where i am at home. No sane normal relationship can grow from the soil i have to offer...at least not yet. So, money is my stock in trade. Take his!

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    In terms of getting cash for things, when he wants to spend time with you, say something like "ohhhh, I SO wish I could!!! But my bill/payment/whatever is due in a few days so I'm going to have to stay here and work some shifts at the club to pay for it". Or, "I reeeeally wish I could, but that day of the week is one of the busiest at the club, I can't lose out on the $1000 I usually make on that day" and if he's a good SD, he'll offer to pay the money so you can go. If he keeps trying to find a day when you're not at the club so he doesn't have to recompensate you, be careful. And yup, the car definitely needs to be in your name.


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    God/dess cherryblossomsinspring's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Quote Originally Posted by Girl Anachronism View Post
    No no no, I found out he's married because he told me.. when I flew out to see him, like the 3rd time we hung out. He said he had something to tell me I probably wouldn't like but he had to be honest, seemed kinda scared to tell me but he did. I didn't really say anything back just frowned and said I wan't sure how I felt about that. If I had found out on my own I'd be mad.. but I'm not mad, it just changed my view on what kind of relationship was developing which is a good thing. Now I know not to get attached or be exclusive with him because he's a cheater.

    And as for the car he didn't mention anything about it being in my name or his, so we'll see about that.

    Thanks for all the advice so far
    Sorry about that I thought for some reason you looked him up and found out on your own. My mistake. Still 3rd time after flying out? If you knew he was married you probably would have said " I'm busy but I'll be in the club on this day".

    So yes agree with pinups4 that he took a big chance in telling you but he waited until the 3rd date when you had already considered him relationship material. The sanity and smiles eh I wouldn't call it that. He could easily rub one or two out in the bathroom and get off. He's looking for a relationship outside of his marriage and how can you sanely lie to someone and hide your activities. That seems like alot of work on changing clothes and coming up with excuses to be "out of town on business". If anything it's the chase and the fun of doing something wrong coupled with " I might get caught" that makes it something to do. In other words it's a high.

    P4P? I wouldn't do that either. p4p is really the new term in the sugar to be on escort rates but not escort time tables. So $300 for a full night when an escort is getting that by the hour.

    I suggest just not sleeping with him as long as possible and enjoying his gifts and cash. The good thing he's not one of those cheap ugly types so you got a good looking SD that sounds financially generous. I say keep accepting all that he has to give.

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    Featured Member Girl Anachronism's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    deleted..
    Last edited by Girl Anachronism; 12-05-2012 at 03:13 PM.

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    NUMBER 1: DO NOT sleep with him. As a woman, it is unnatural to have sex with a man on a regular basis without developing some form of attachment. Oxytocin, the love hormone, will kick in. And when it does, his wife will begin to matter to you and so will his time and gifts he gives you. Avoid sex at all costs!

    NUMBER 2: DO NOT get anything in his name, ie: Car, apartment, credit card, etc. You don't want any ties to his investments/money in case his wife finds out or his business fails. Having no ties to him gives you an easy out if shit hits the fan.

    NUMBER 3: DO NOT take off work for him. If you do, make sure he compensates you at least 1k or more for what you would have made at the club. And try not to get used to taking off work for him too much or you will get used to the sugar baby lifestyle and when he's done with playing with you, you're going to find it very difficult to be stripping again. REMEMBER: SUGAR DADDIES ALL HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE. Be ready for that day.

    Be safe than sorry. Get the cash and gifts. Go shopping, give him a fashion show, make him feel like a king, eat well, then go home. Don't let his charm, good looks and gifts deviate you from your goal. Define your goal right now that it's early in the SD relationship and stick with it.
    "Where there is love there is life"-Mahatma Gandhi

    "Be The Best, F!ck The Rest"- P.P.


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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Quote Originally Posted by kikiwiki View Post
    NUMBER 1: DO NOT sleep with him. As a woman, it is unnatural to have sex with a man on a regular basis without developing some form of attachment. Oxytocin, the love hormone, will kick in. And when it does, his wife will begin to matter to you and so will his time and gifts he gives you. Avoid sex at all costs!

    NUMBER 2: DO NOT get anything in his name, ie: Car, apartment, credit card, etc. You don't want any ties to his investments/money in case his wife finds out or his business fails. Having no ties to him gives you an easy out if shit hits the fan.

    NUMBER 3: DO NOT take off work for him. If you do, make sure he compensates you at least 1k or more for what you would have made at the club. And try not to get used to taking off work for him too much or you will get used to the sugar baby lifestyle and when he's done with playing with you, you're going to find it very difficult to be stripping again. REMEMBER: SUGAR DADDIES ALL HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE. Be ready for that day.

    Be safe than sorry. Get the cash and gifts. Go shopping, give him a fashion show, make him feel like a king, eat well, then go home. Don't let his charm, good looks and gifts deviate you from your goal. Define your goal right now that it's early in the SD relationship and stick with it.
    I don't think recommendation NUMBER 1 is always true. For example, plenty of escorts have regulars who they do not become attached to. It would be wise for the OP to make sure she does not become attached if she were to sleep with him.

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    Featured Member kikiwiki's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Luke, it's rare when a woman doesn't get attached after sex, and those who don't become successful escorts. Girl Anachronism is not an escort and based on her initial post, it sounds like she got a bit emotional over learning about his wife and kids. So I don't recommend her sleeping with him AT ALL or else she'll set herself up for major heartache that money and gifts can't buy off the pain.
    "Where there is love there is life"-Mahatma Gandhi

    "Be The Best, F!ck The Rest"- P.P.


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    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Of course Luke doesn't think it's true. LOL.

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    Quote Originally Posted by Vyanka View Post
    Of course Luke doesn't think it's true. LOL.
    Vyanka:

    Au contraire, I wish it were true (that women can have unemotional sex) more often ;o)

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    i want an sd!!! lol

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    Featured Member Girl Anachronism's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    deletedelete
    Last edited by Girl Anachronism; 12-05-2012 at 03:14 PM.

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    There's still a window that they may reconcile. I wouldn't take him seriously until the ink is dry on the divorce papers. And even then, he may want to try his new found freedom with more girls so keep your eyes open. As much as we want to feel so special that they left home to be with us, they will likely repeat the same acts on us. Real talk.
    "Where there is love there is life"-Mahatma Gandhi

    "Be The Best, F!ck The Rest"- P.P.


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    Featured Member Lady Xplicit18's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    ^^^EXACTLY. what makes you think he won't do that with you? I'd keep it strictly business still.
    "Strippers are like pet tigers. They are nice to look at but they are not for everyone."

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    Default Re: Is this a "SD" ..?

    for sure what kiki and lady xplicit said. this dude is newly separated- he is going to be having girls left and right. milk him for all you can NOW.

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