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Thread: Why dont you approach?

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    Default Why dont you approach?

    Observing, girls really dont approach. I dont understand it. They approach every two guys. While chatting with one that I approached, she played it off saying she doesnt need to. She "tips" good and the floor hosts will bring her to tables. The night I met her, she ignored half the room and went by me once trying make her rounds seeking a sale. On her second walk around I grabbed her because she was super cute.
    Had she actually approached me, I would of said sure . From a customer point of view, it seems like there are psychological differences when approaching. It gives me the feeling that I am in charge. Its like the customer is leading, which may not be a good thing for the girl. I notice they dont try to upsell. Maybe its because my SC confidence shows more. Also, I feel as if I could stop it a little easier then as if she approached and just emptied my wallet.


    Why dont you go up to every customer? Why not just approach and have a time limit, and then excuse yourself if they dont start spending?

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Some girls do, some don't. I have nights where I don't have time to approach everyone because regulars come in. Sometimes I just can't be bothered with certain tables if they seem loud, obnoxious or rude. Some girls are just plain lazy and think money will come to them. It could be a multitude of things.

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    Featured Member Addison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Being one to admittedly judge a book by it's cover, I usually target a very specific demographic. That said, there are a number of factors that may land a guy near the bottom of the Approach List. Some major factors, such as being rude or obnoxious.. and some very small influences, like wearing a cowboy hat. *shrug* I'll make it over there eventually.

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Wheres a popcorn emoticon when i need one...
    Quote Originally Posted by Natalllia View Post
    Comparing strip clubs to other kinds of sales jobs is not a valid approach, because we are selling a service, not an inanimate object.

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by Addison View Post
    Being one to admittedly judge a book by it's cover, I usually target a very specific demographic. That said, there are a number of factors that may land a guy near the bottom of the Approach List. Some major factors, such as being rude or obnoxious.. and some very small influences, like wearing a cowboy hat. *shrug* I'll make it over there eventually.
    This. I was totally guilty of profiling. If I didn't approach, there was usually a reason why.

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    The girls who approach me straight away will get my business over the others. When a girls approaches five guys before me, for example, makes me believe that they perceive me to be sloppy seconds and not their first choice for a lap dance.

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by Wayne Root View Post
    When a girls approaches five guys before me, for example, makes me believe that they perceive me to be sloppy seconds and not their first choice for a lap dance.
    Really? Who they approach first could be determined by something as simple as where you are sitting or if they see regulars in the club. The fact is, unless you get there when the club opens you are not going to be any dancer's first choice for a sales pitch-yes, it's a sales pitch dude. She's not asking you for a date and this isn't a high school dance. She wants your money. In fact, she wants every guy's money in the club. It's a long shift and guys come and go from the club all day. Sooner or later any good dancer will visit all of her potential targets.

    Of course, an alternate possibility, if you feel you are getting ignored by dancers, is that you may be doing something to turn them off from asking you. Could be your attire, could be your vibe or it could be the fact that it sounds like you are turning down a lot of dancers if they didn't ask you first. News like that travels through the dressing room pretty quickly.
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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    There are a number of factors which contribute to whether or not I'll approach you (which I won't go into here). Are you complaining because you keep getting ignored?
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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by Wayne Root View Post
    The girls who approach me straight away will get my business over the others. When a girls approaches five guys before me, for example, makes me believe that they perceive me to be sloppy seconds and not their first choice for a lap dance.
    What sort of mentality is this? If I was a prior customer of the girl, it might make me wonder why she didn't come directly over, but that's about it. If her initial perception (or preconceived notion) of you matters to you, you don't belong in a strip club. For the most part, a dancer will not think much of a customer until the customer gives her a reason to think differently. As for me personally, for the months that I spent as a regular to no dancer, I never had a problem approaching dancers I was interested in and actually preferred that I not be approached at all.
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    I never had a problem approaching dancers I was interested in and actually preferred that I not be approached at all.
    ^^This about 90% of the time.^^

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdog83 View Post
    Observing, girls really dont approach. I dont understand it. They approach every two guys. While chatting with one that I approached, she played it off saying she doesnt need to. She "tips" good and the floor hosts will bring her to tables. The night I met her, she ignored half the room and went by me once trying make her rounds seeking a sale. On her second walk around I grabbed her because she was super cute.
    Had she actually approached me, I would of said sure . From a customer point of view, it seems like there are psychological differences when approaching. It gives me the feeling that I am in charge. Its like the customer is leading, which may not be a good thing for the girl. I notice they dont try to upsell. Maybe its because my SC confidence shows more. Also, I feel as if I could stop it a little easier then as if she approached and just emptied my wallet.

    Why dont you go up to every customer? Why not just approach and have a time limit, and then excuse yourself if they dont start spending?
    There are an infinite number of reasons for this. Some may be related to them and others may be your issues. Possiblities include, but are not limited to, the following:


    1. Her dance card is already full.
    2. She is lazy and/or just doesn't feel like it at the moment.
    3. You look like a bum/creep/perv/broke guy/something else.
    4. Your body language is warning them off.
    5. She is already making money with the guy she has been sitting with forever, but you just don't know it.
    6. She is shy and/or new and has trouble approaching guys.
    7. She isn't drunk enough to work yet.
    8. She is waiting for a call/food delivery/regular/you-pick-one.
    9. She is not feeling well.
    10. She has a stage set coming up.
    11. Anything else you can dream of.


    Now there is nothing that you can do about any of their issues, but you can obviously manage your own in a way to maximize your approachability. Dressing nicely and acting relaxed and friendly help a great deal IME.

    At the end of the day, it is just entertainment. Idk about you, but I don't need to have any particular girl badly enough that I'm willing to chase after her when she is clearly avoiding me for some reason. I like my dancers to be motivated to earn my business, but to each his own I suppose.

    Anyway, just my

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    ^^^I think you left an important one off the list. Sometimes, they're just tired of getting turned down. Even the best girls strike out two times out of three when they approach a guy. If the customer doesn't look promising (financially), they tend to get ignored. The dancer figures "why let this guy turn me down too?".
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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    ^^^I think you left an important one off the list. Sometimes, they're just tired of getting turned down. Even the best girls strike out two times out of three when they approach a guy. If the customer doesn't look promising (financially), they tend to get ignored. The dancer figures "why let this guy turn me down too?".
    For an average dancer, it's shooting fish in a barrel. Tons of guys go to one place in order to buy dances. And, by your logic, the best girls get one in three to dance with her. Any salesperson would love those odds! So many places have tons of guys sitting around with no girls approaching them because they're hanging out in their dressing room. And so many dancers go out there maybe twice per hour with less than no personality. I'm fine with being treated like an ATM, but I screen out the overtly mercenary dancers.

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by Wayne Root View Post
    For an average dancer, it's shooting fish in a barrel. Tons of guys go to one place in order to buy dances. And, by your logic, the best girls get one in three to dance with her. Any salesperson would love those odds! So many places have tons of guys sitting around with no girls approaching them because they're hanging out in their dressing room. And so many dancers go out there maybe twice per hour with less than no personality. I'm fine with being treated like an ATM, but I screen out the overtly mercenary dancers.
    First off, that's not my logic, the "customer captured" ratio comes straight from a couple of the most successful veteran dancers I've known. I'm sure the less polished and successful dancers don't do nearly as well. You are not seeing things from their perspective, but rather from that of a SCJ. You're content to go in, observe the girls, wait for one to approach you, play the ATM (your words), and then leave. The girls are there, many not happy about it, a lot longer than the typical customer. Selling 50 dances a week means they are probably turned down at least 100 times a week and they are selling themselves, not insurance or appliances. Try as they might, they are not always able to take the rejections impersonally. A few of the dancers I became very friendly with "made the rounds" as a last resort only, largely because they didn't like getting turned down. It's only "shooting fish in a barrel" if the girl is a "mercenary dancer".
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Quote Originally Posted by Wayne Root View Post
    For an average dancer, it's shooting fish in a barrel. Tons of guys go to one place in order to buy dances. And, by your logic, the best girls get one in three to dance with her. Any salesperson would love those odds! So many places have tons of guys sitting around with no girls approaching them because they're hanging out in their dressing room. And so many dancers go out there maybe twice per hour with less than no personality. I'm fine with being treated like an ATM, but I screen out the overtly mercenary dancers.
    No, tons of guys go into clubs to hang out, drink and stare at naked women. Only a certain % of these guys actually buy dances and some cannot even be bothered to ever tip a girl for a stage set. On any given night, there are clubs all over the country where LD areas are very lightly used. Sorry to say it this way, but it sounds to me like your comments are founded upon theory rather than experience.

    If you think about what these girls are doing, it is essentially convincing a guy to spend $20-25+ dollars for 3 minutes of her close attention, or $40-50+ for 6 minutes, $60-75 for 9 minutes, etc. That is a tough sale in many places. Remember that a guy who makes $50,000 per year in a decent fulltime job earns the rough equivalent of $25 per hour, so every 3 minute LD costs him a full hour of pay. And they have to make enough of these sales every night in order to earn their livings.

    And in terms of your theorizing about dancers hanging in dressing rooms all night, I'm not really seeing so much of that. And when they decide not to approach certain guys, they may have very good reasons for not doing so, including prior experiences with those particular guys or others like them.
    Last edited by rickdugan; 05-25-2012 at 12:27 PM.

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    Default Re: Why dont you approach?

    Tried to read the last few posts, but after R.D's response a few up, my eyes glazed over..

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