When you get turned down for a dance do you hope that he doesn't get dances with anyone else so you don't feel unattractive?
When you get turned down for a dance do you hope that he doesn't get dances with anyone else so you don't feel unattractive?



No, I always want every customer who walks into my club to enjoy themselves and I'm not stupid enough to think I fit into everyone's tastes. If a guy straight up tells me he's only into latinas, the best thing I can do is go grab a latina chick for him. Then when she comes across a guy who is only into white chicks, she'll find me. Where I work it is understood that we have enough variety that we're not direct competition to each other .



I just smile to be polite or give them a bitchy look to make them feel uncomfortable, it's like hey fuck you! I don't neeeeed yo stank ass!




No, it's just a case of personal taste. Some are only into blondes/whatever. Some like all the girls but if I just didn't do it for them I can think how I can change my game to make me seem more like their perfect girl. Sometimes it's me and a half-hearted hustle.
Also agreed with devus- don't give a shit what customers think about my appearance



The way I see it, I never know who any particular customer may know or bring with them next time they visit my club, especially since times are tough lately, word of mouth is stronger than ever and I always want to be seen as the happy girl. Whether I'm happy because I just got handed $400 or because I was able to find another girl who better sited that customer's tastes, my smile will make me money either way .





I usually wasn't bothered because all men have preferences and sometimes a brunette isn't what they want, they may prefer a blonde or another ethnicity or whatever. The only time it ever bothered me was when I wasted my time with a guy and then he turned around and bought dances from someone else. If he's not interested he should mention upfront. One other time does spring to mind though and that was the time I was dancing with about 5 other dancers, all blonde. Three of the blonde dancers were ugly and two were obese and he got dances from all of them and not me because he hated brunettes. Him and his friend were the only two customers at that time in the club so when it was my turn to go on stage I just sat there. His friend complained (he wasn't buying dances at all nor was he tipping)to the manager and this is the one time the manager backed me up saying no tipping, no dancing.
I would hope that most dancers wouldn't get upset, or at the very least not display that emotion!
Granted, I'm not a dancer, but in my niche of the sex industry there's a certain sub-set of guy who actually wants to screw with our heads by 'rejecting us'. Bear in mind, in my niche (camming), the guys seek us out. We don't message customers asking them if they desire our services in manner a dancer would approaching a potential customer in a club.
In 'rejecting' us, I think it makes some guys feel as though they have a modicum of power, so if their behaviour creates the intended effect of causing chicas to feel 'rejected' or less worthy, these guys are getting what it is they want. For free! Screw that. :-)
It seems that in every sphere of sex work these guys exist, the ones who use dancers, cam chicas, etc as an outlet for their frustration with and generalized anger towards women. To give them the satisfaction of allowing them to screw with our heads is giving them something they don't deserve.
I appreciate the dancer hustle because your job is more 'sales-oriented' than camming, in that most of y'all do approach customers, rather than vice versa. As such, it would seem to me that rejection' is part of the job, in that not every guy who enters a club is going to buy dancers from every single chica working the room. Even the decent guys probably say no once in a while. I love Desu's approach, and I follow that myself. When I'm working I'm focused on engaging with customers. A guy who isn't going to spend isn't a customer, or at least not mine. That doesn't make him an asshole, he's just...not relevant.
It wouldn't make sense to get upset at something irrelevant.




Hey Pig-
When you get ignored for a dance by a dancer do you hope that she doesn't sell dances to anyone else so that you don't feel unwanted?
No. Think about our job-if we got upset each time that happened none of us would have lasted two minutes.


I always tell dancers that I am" good" and don't let the conversation continue if I am not intersted. I take issue when the dancer forces the conversation to continue, leaving me no polite way of cutting it off. However, I would think that professionals would not get pissed if customers pick who they want.

Oh my. I hope I haven't made someone annoyed by a turn down (I always try to be polite). But remember, ladies that there are a number of reasons I don't go for every dance offer:
1) I just got there. I want to savor the view, enjoying the visual stimulation for a while before I escalate the experience. Sometimes 'maybe later' really means that.
2) I might be waiting to see if one of my regulars is there. There are some dancers who I have a history with and a bit of extra magic happens with them.
3) my wallet (and libido) have limits. I cannot give full attention to every woman in the club.
4) Even if I did prefer the look of another dancer, don't take it seriously. I well know I'm not the hottest stud sitting at the bar.
5) Remember this is a business. You're there for the money, not because you want this guy, don't let emotions get involved.
6) there are some dancers I've eventually connected with after I've seen them a couple of times.
And a note to comment #3(C): I have an active sex life. I like the club scene precisely because it's a simple uncomplicated erotic experience just for laying down some cash.
Then let's see some pics, sweetie.
I would also like to add that strippers can be quite self conscious. One asked me for a dance twice in a span of an hour, then when I said no she asked if I was planning on getting dances with anyone else. I think she was relieved when I said no. And a friend of mine got yelled at by a stripper for not getting a boner during a dance. So I wonder, are you as confident as you'd like me to believe?



Sweetie?? Really?
Why would she find a need to provide pictures to try to validate herself to you??









Last edited by MyButter; 09-05-2012 at 06:07 AM. Reason: lol, i don't need explain myself.





I doubt the girls take things too personally. A steady string of denials might put a damper on things for them but they're not asking for dates, they're asking for a chance to take your money. in order to make a lot of money off a lot of guys, getting turned down becomes part of the equation.
"never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe
If you're in your twenties and aren't a liberal, you have no heart. If you're in you're forties and aren't a conservative, you have no brain - Winston Churchill





Bem is right and, honestly, girls who don't learn how to handle rejection don't last long in the business. Even on a great day you will probably get more no's than yes's unless you have a string of regulars lined up.









Short answer: Yes.
..but not because it makes me feel unattractive. Hell, I get mad when girls are doing dances for guys I haven't even talked to yet!










Pig, what are you fishing for here, admissions from dancers that you have the power to make them feel bad when you turn them down?
IMHO the answer is yes for some and no for others. IME the seasoned pros learn to roll with it, but there are indeed a number of dancers out there who don't handle rejection too well. You happen to be on a site with a lot of seasoned and savvy dancers, so the answers you are receiving from this group are not surprising.
But why revel in it? As a customer, I don't take any pleasure in making a dancer feel bad about herself. In fact, my goal is to minimize excess drama, which only gets in the way of my entertainment.
Last edited by rickdugan; 09-05-2012 at 09:23 AM.





No. That means he can't afford me. ;-P
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