Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 51

Thread: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

  1. #1
    Newbie Lottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    14
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 10 Times in 4 Posts

    Default My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Let me start off by explaining what lead me to my decision to become a dancer. At age 11(yes 11), I felt the overwhelming urge to become a stripper. At 11. Obviously, I couldn't do that, so I left the idea to rot in the back of my mind. Once I turned 19, the idea came back to me. With a car and a job, I figured "why not", but then reality hit and I remembered how overweight I am. I once again left the idea alone. Until, one day at work, when one of the larger girls I worked with told me about how she used to day, and brought home decent money, despite being one of the larger girls. So with the help of a good friend, I scoured the city looking for clubs until I came across one willing to hire on the spot. I danced my little heart away every day for three weeks, only to find that I'd be bringing home money I could count on one hand. The most I had made was 50, which came out to 38 after floor fees and such. I left once I realized I wasn't going to bring anything home worth losing sleep over. I actually began having severe hallucinations from my lack of sleep.

    I decided to try another club on the southside of town. A place a larger African American would have a better opportunity to make money, since the area is mostly Mexican. I was used to maybe 3 customers during my entire shift at the previous club. This club had at least 20 people and the next shift hadn't even started. I put on my best outfit and headed for the floor. Almost immediately I was confronted with obscene proposals from a man pretending he couldn't understand English. Hours later I was in the corner attempting to make myself less of a target after a day of being bombarded by Mexican men wanting sex. I was so irritated by the fact that the bouncer was prejudice against larger girls and wouldnt help me when I was cornered by three men who attempted to shove beer down my throat, even after I told them I couldn't drink. They tag teamed me, grabbing and sucking at my breast, and trying to finger me and the bouncer would look away every time I looked to him for help.

    The icing on the cake came later in the day when two dancers started a fight that had the entire bar in arms. I got the chance to witness grown ass folks beating the shit out of the bartender while he had a taser in hand, and watched a girl hit repeatedly in the face with the dressingroom door. And of course there was the butcher lesbian attacking customers with a pool stick. After it was safe to leave, I grabbed my pepper spray and asked the bouncer to walk me to my car. He walked me to the door. Which is nowhere near my car. So for now, my dancing days are over. I'll spend this extra time getting toned so I can find an upscale place to dance for. I'm not giving up hope, just yet.

  2. #2
    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2008
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    4,980
    Thanks
    621
    Thanked 6,894 Times in 2,672 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I'm sorry you've had such lame experiences with stripping. Some cities are just not worth dancing in. Fingers crossed an upscale club works out for you!

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to shanna dior For This Useful Post:


  4. #3
    Featured Member luscious sadie's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    1,586
    Thanks
    1,166
    Thanked 2,383 Times in 779 Posts
    My Mood
    Busy

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    My advice: lose weight and set yourself up for success with regards to good clubs, good customers, and good opportunities.

    I wish that it was as easy as want to dance make money but it really isn't. If this is a dream of yours (or still is) then you're going to have to work for it and there is still no guarantee that you will make money anyway. Losing weight is the first thing that will help you. Not necessarily becoming super thin but if you're "overweight" you enter into the fetish market or become the girl that guys think that they can get away with more with because she is desperate. You're also not going to get into the good clubs where they don't have customers who will try to fuck you and bouncers who look the other way.

    when you go to a club and audition make sure you look amazing in every way. Your hair has to be polished, your outfits have to work for stripping (so many newbies wear lingerie or other things that aren't flattering at all) and you have to know how to hustle. You want to get into a club that allows you to look banging and will back you up.

    my honest opinion is that you had a shitty experience because you didn't set yourself up for success. That might be kind of harsh and I'm sorry if it is. You can easily change that though by working on a few things and making yourself much more desirable to clubs and customers. Good luck!
    [/center]

    Quote Originally Posted by Laurisa View Post
    Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy shit.

  5. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to luscious sadie For This Useful Post:


  6. #4
    Newbie Lottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    14
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 10 Times in 4 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I appreciate the advice. I've struggled with my weight since I was 8, so I have quite a long way to go. I'm not going to give up. I've got a membership to a 24 hour gym that I plan to use during the time that I would normally spend dancing. I'm also going to take a pole dancing class. I learned a few pole tricks in my down time, but I need to perfect them. Some of the girls were shocked to see me on the pole at all. All that extra thigh came in handy. Hahaha. I knew the world of dancing was a bit cut-throat, but I didn't know it was this crazy. The girls as well as the customers can be so harsh. I had never felt so self conscious until I had a customer slap my ass and make elephant sounds. I wanted to hide in the dressing for the rest of the night. But now I know. It is my dream, and will remain my dream, so I'm willing to do whatever it take to achieve it. After this last reeses cup....

  7. #5
    Banned
    Joined
    May 2004
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    1,725
    Thanks
    92
    Thanked 395 Times in 244 Posts
    My Mood
    Angry

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I feel very bad for you. U seem like a really sweet girl..This industry is harsh and overly judgmental..Hell people think Im prolly overweight at 133-135 so I can only imagine how hard it is for u...idk what state/city u live in but around here there are plenty of dive bars and even I rarely hear of such severe incidents occurring at a club. U need to go to a different area where there is some decency in the clubs. Also you are going to have to like another poster mentioned work hard to achieve a slimmer body. It is painful but life is harsh and the people within a strip club are some of the most critical people ever...I wish u much luck and keep ur chin up.

  8. #6
    Veteran Member Joanna_Kaary's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Cleveland Ohio
    Posts
    372
    Thanks
    929
    Thanked 608 Times in 220 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    It is really hard if you are "meant" (based on genetics and whatnot) to weigh more, like me. But it is possible. It just may take a while to lose weight and then once you get there you just always gotta keep it in the back of your mind to watch what you eat in order to maintain it. The worst (but easiest) thing to do on a day when it feels like you're not seeing any results is to get frustrated and binge eat, because it is a cycle.

    Don't worry about becoming skinny because not everyone can be skinny and not everyone should be skinny. Get down to a size where your problem areas (idk what yours are but mine is my stomach and upper back, which is weird) are under control. You mentioned your thighs but thick thighs is not necessarily a bad thing. Part two of your mission is gonna be to find a good club, which doesn't necessarily have to be an upscale club (but could be, a lot of clubs want at least one or two thicker girls for variety just not too many, so you may want to check back a few months later if a certain club didn't hire you, in case one of their thicker girls left.) It sounds like you had a really bad experience with an urban club but some urban clubs can be great for girls that fit the look, and they won't all be as crazy and terrible as the one you were at.

    If there just aren't any worthwhile clubs to be found in your area, you might want to consider traveling one or two weekends a month to a semi-nearby city or state... just do your research because depending on the city you choose, you might need to be at least 21, or you might need to get an entertainer card, etc. That might work for you because you got a car and a day job... you might even be able to recruit the ex-stripper you know to go with you so you'd have some company! That way you could satisfy your money-itch without dealing with the day to day headaches of working around a bunch of d-bag customers...

    Good luck!

  9. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Joanna_Kaary For This Useful Post:


  10. #7
    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2008
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    4,980
    Thanks
    621
    Thanked 6,894 Times in 2,672 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lottie View Post
    I had never felt so self conscious until I had a customer slap my ass and make elephant sounds. I wanted to hide in the dressing for the rest of the night.
    In the sake of full disclosure, things like this will happen even when you're thin or at your ideal weight. The sad truth is that a lot of customers get their rocks off by putting down pretty girls. If you're not fat, they'll find something else to harp over. Confidence and letting their insignificant opinions roll off your back is absolutely critical in making it in this industry, and more important than being thin. So, while you're working on losing weight and toning up, work on your self esteem as well. It's much easier to handle rude comments and sell yourself when you really believe in you're worth every penny.

  11. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to shanna dior For This Useful Post:


  12. #8
    Newbie Lottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    14
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 10 Times in 4 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    My genetics are terrible. Both sides of my family are huge. My mom was lucky enough to have a tall lanky father, so she was almost born with a dancers body. Im also a compulsive eater, a habit I picked up after an unfortunate childhood trauma. I went to therapy for it, but my psychiatrist kind of laughed it off, like it wasn't a big deal.Now that I have a taste of what dancing can be, I want more. I love the feeling of being on stage. I love the rush. Sometimes I forget I have an audience. And I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get to my ideal size. Not just to dance, but to be my best me.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to Lottie For This Useful Post:


  14. #9
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    wow. babe, i am extremely sorry and angry that has happened to you! i am so pissed off that has happened to you its fucking disgusting and terrible.

    theres nothing wrong being a bigger girl, i know some really sexy ones, unfortunately bigger girls get hired mostly at dives and ghetto places where this type of behavior happens and with that type of income. if you REALLY want to to dance, work hard on losing weight and keeping up with your appearance so you can get hired at better clubs. weight is not the only thing that would get you hired. try to look as polished as possible- i know a really good looking guy who has a high maintenance appearance, however he is short and it sucks to be a short guy but his motto is- "there are somethings you cant help but you can help what you can." and his handsome looks really make up for his height.

    please dont be down on yourself and dont give up hope. im not sure how old you are but im guessing young- dont worry it will never be too late to start dancing there are some dancers who are older and take really good care of their selves and looking better than 18 year olds. also, no matter what you look like, SOMEONE in the club will criticize you and say some nasty shit.

    and i applaud you for having respect for yourself and walking away from this bullshit. some girls end up getting sucked in or desperate enough to allow to let their selves get treated this way. continue to be the strong person you are, i believe you will figure it out.

  15. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to JoJoX For This Useful Post:


  16. #10
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Lottie when you say you are a bigger girl do you mean in the clubs or in real life? that actually makes a difference as strange as it sounds. I was a bigger dancer though in real life I was quite small. However the upscale clubs would reject me because they considered a size 6 or as slim as a 4 (my smallest)as fat. I remember one club I went to at 5'7 and 115 and the woman looked at me and said "you think you could lose 10 more pounds?" They wanted very slim and no matter how much I lost I was never slim enough. I was accepted at the mid level clubs though and made a lot of money. If you are genetically a large woman you can change some things but not everything like bones (I have a large chest and shoulders).

    The fact is this industry is not for everyone. Maybe it's not for you and there is nothing wrong with that. That club sounds scary to me and I don't blame you for quitting I would too (and have quit clubs like that). Maybe you will find a better club or maybe you can concentrate on another niche of the industry like private parties, modeling, or camming.

  17. #11
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Hamburg, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    10,607
    Thanks
    2,705
    Thanked 13,685 Times in 4,414 Posts
    Blog Entries
    5
    My Mood
    In Love

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    You could always try camming...there is a market for everything on camming. Also I don't know what your weight range is but I do remember seeing an ad for a strip club that caters exclusively to larger women. I don't know if traveling is an option.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

  18. #12
    Newbie Lottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    14
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 10 Times in 4 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I'm plus sized in real life. I live in Oklahoma,and the girls I've seen tend to be a bit larger, but skinny nonetheless. My mom is a size six and my gran is also after losing a ridiculous amount of weight, and they're still very chesty and hippy. If I buckle down I might be able to make it to a size 6, but I have broad shoulders and hips, which make me think I might just not be cut out for an upscale club. I hope that's not the case.

  19. #13
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    You could always try camming...there is a market for everything on camming. Also I don't know what your weight range is but I do remember seeing an ad for a strip club that caters exclusively to larger women. I don't know if traveling is an option.
    i was going to suggest that but i did not want to get beat up by the dancers on here who thinks SW is being dominated by cam girls lol.

  20. #14
    Newbie Lottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    14
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 10 Times in 4 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I've heard about camming, but is there really any money in it? I enjoy stripping because of the live aspect of it. Being around people and on a stage.

  21. #15
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    By plus size do you mean over a size 16? if so, yes you are too big for the upscale and the midlevel clubs probably as well. However it depends on how well you hold your size. I had a roommate who was larger but had a huge butt and breasts and she banked.

  22. #16
    Featured Member
    Joined
    May 2011
    Location
    Miami
    Posts
    1,529
    Thanks
    2,260
    Thanked 2,276 Times in 730 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    None of this would have happened (at least not to you or in your presence) if you'd put your big girl panties on and lost the excessive weight before starting. We don't typically get hired because we are smart or educated. Stripping is about being beautiful and more so than the average fatty you see on the street. This is why good clubs only hire thin/slender/in shape and beautiful women, because they, too, know that.

    Its easy to blame everything and everyone around you, but you know what the real problem is. Can't expect to build a mansion on a shitty foundation.

    Let me add, those people who assaulted you didn't have the right to do it to you for any reason whatsoever, but you knew better than to stick around at a place like that.

  23. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to lokikola For This Useful Post:


  24. #17
    Newbie Lottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    14
    Thanks
    6
    Thanked 10 Times in 4 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I came here seeking advice and to share what in hindsight is a funny story. If I wanted to be insulted and bitched at I could call my father. I may not be skinny, but I damn sure aint some average fatty. And I refuse to hold myself as such. Skinny and beautiful are two different things. I've seen plenty of cracked out skinny bitches on poles that deserve paper bags as part of their costumes. I'm not sure what the "real problem" you speak of is, because if you're assuming I sit on my ass all day you're dead wrong. It angers me to see people lazily going about when I'm lucky if I have 6 hours of sleep a night. My foundation is built on solid ground.

  25. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Lottie For This Useful Post:


  26. #18
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    But the thing is most men go to these clubs to see women with hot bodies. They don't want to see average women they want fantasy girls with good bodies and pretty faces. Fat women with a few exceptions don't last in this industry because most guys don't like it. It's brutal business and only the strong survive.

  27. #19
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Quote Originally Posted by lokikola View Post
    Let me add, those people who assaulted you didn't have the right to do it to you for any reason whatsoever, but you knew better than to stick around at a place like that.
    she said she quit, she did not stick around. she was in two clubs within a month, she did know better than to stick around and be treated that way. its not like she spent years or even months in clubs like this. she DID stand up for herself and she left.

    not only that, she did try to wait until she lost weight but she was inspired by a girl who said she made money even though she was big. no one knows better until they actually learn, and that she did. did you know everything about stripping the first day you started?? she even said she was not losing hope so its not like she thinks dancing is the worst job ever or as you say, shes not blaming anyone for this. she was simply just sharing a horrible experience she had which is beneficial because maybe some newbie who hasnt started dancing yet will learn from her story.
    Last edited by JoJoX; 09-12-2012 at 05:38 PM.

  28. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to JoJoX For This Useful Post:


  29. #20
    Featured Member JoJoX's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,698
    Thanks
    1,351
    Thanked 4,248 Times in 1,017 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    But the thing is most men go to these clubs to see women with hot bodies. They don't want to see average women they want fantasy girls with good bodies and pretty faces. Fat women with a few exceptions don't last in this industry because most guys don't like it. It's brutal business and only the strong survive.
    kelly, there are sooo many under average looking strippers! not all of them look like they walked out of a music video. so many times i see a girl who is in my opinion, unattractive make bank on both cam and in the club.

  30. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to JoJoX For This Useful Post:


  31. #21
    Veteran Member Joanna_Kaary's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Cleveland Ohio
    Posts
    372
    Thanks
    929
    Thanked 608 Times in 220 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lottie View Post
    Skinny and beautiful are two different things. I've seen plenty of cracked out skinny bitches on poles that deserve paper bags as part of their costumes.
    Amen.

  32. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Joanna_Kaary For This Useful Post:


  33. #22
    God/dess Jay12's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Hill country.
    Posts
    2,926
    Thanks
    1,653
    Thanked 1,896 Times in 955 Posts
    My Mood
    Stressed

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I had seen plenty of fatties making big bucks without having to do extras. Of course, they had usually been in either mid tier or dive-ish clubs but the type of club really doesn't dictate how much money you'll make.





  34. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Jay12 For This Useful Post:


  35. #23
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Hamburg, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    10,607
    Thanks
    2,705
    Thanked 13,685 Times in 4,414 Posts
    Blog Entries
    5
    My Mood
    In Love

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I can't speak for the camming industry since I don't know squat about it but do a search. I am sorry for what happened to you. nobody deserves that to happen to them.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

  36. #24
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    Quote Originally Posted by JoJoX View Post
    kelly, there are sooo many under average looking strippers! not all of them look like they walked out of a music video. so many times i see a girl who is in my opinion, unattractive make bank on both cam and in the club.
    Sadly this is true and I wish it wasn't. It really wasn't years ago but I've seen some of the dancers hired now and many are unattractive. I think it needs to be like it was years ago and the standards are partly why many uggos and fatties dance.

  37. #25
    Senior Member gonzo2000's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    86
    Thanks
    46
    Thanked 34 Times in 16 Posts
    My Mood
    Busy

    Default Re: My month as a dancer (a.k.a. why I'm hanging up my heels)

    I know men like all kinds. But, the most popular clubs in Vegas both now (Spearmint Rhino) and in 2003 (Crazy Horse 2) are filled with mostly gorgeous women. If that wasn't what majority of men wanted, the clubs wouldn't hire them. To me, it's a no brainer that a hot body is what the industry is based on. I have to say, I look pretty damn fit- 130 pounds and 5'8 and yet I still want to get more lean as I am self conscious about my weight. On some level I admire the chubby girls that have to balls to run around in a g string!

    Lose the weight. Play the game. It is what it is. You really going to quit something you want so bad just over a few pounds?
    Okay life, you wanna test me some more? BRING IT ON 'cause i can take whatever ya got coming!!!!

  38. The Following User Says Thank You to gonzo2000 For This Useful Post:


Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Hanging up the heels!
    By Elvia in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 61
    Last Post: 03-12-2011, 11:39 PM
  2. Looks like I will be hanging up my heels within a year.
    By VeraLynn in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 09-19-2008, 02:48 PM
  3. hanging up my heels. For good.
    By Lola Rose in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 29
    Last Post: 01-09-2008, 12:51 PM
  4. Hanging up my heels...
    By destiny2980 in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 03-11-2007, 07:33 PM
  5. hanging up the high heels
    By Paris in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 12-27-2003, 07:11 PM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •