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Thread: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

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    Veteran Member Doc Holliday's Avatar
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    Default Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    I really have nothing to add here. Only relationship I had with a stripper lasted about three-four weeks. This is just a response to an opposite thread about dating dancers on another board full of customers and it had about 4 pros to 16 cons. So, I wanted to hear the other side.
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    God/dess Athenathefabulous's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    pros: ???

    cons: you are dating a customer
    The best thing i have heard in a strip club to date:
    customer: we should get married right now! we should get a shotgun marriage!
    me: uhh... i think you are misunderstanding what a shotgun marriage means. A shotgun marriage means you knock me up and my daddy shows up at your door with a gun and forces you to marry me and raise the baby. You mean elope.
    customer: hmm... nah actually i will take the shotgun marriage. At least then we would be having sex.



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    Member Easy Mark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    pros: ???

    cons: you are dating a customer
    So you'd never date a guy who went to clubs? That counts out a huge portion of the adult male population.

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    There really isn't that many pros about dating a customer, Athena completely on the mark. If he's a big tipper then you risk losing that. If he's not why would you want to date him? I think I mentioned this person I know who decided to date a customer and he expected her to pay because "you make more money than me". I would have walked out and never spoke to him again.

    To answer the question, no I generally don't date men who frequent strip clubs. Might make me a hypocrite but I seek out different men than those who go to strip clubs.

    However actually dating a dancer (as compared to p4p which I don't think we are talking about here)is very slim to none. I started a thread awhile back called the chances of dating a customer are slim. This is true. I danced for years, had many regulars and probably danced thousands of dances for hundreds of men no joke and dated ONE. That tells you the chances of this. Other dancers have dated more, even married customers but this isn't that common.

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    Member Easy Mark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    There really isn't that many pros about dating a customer, Athena completely on the mark. If he's a big tipper then you risk losing that. If he's not why would you want to date him? n.
    Well maybe he's funny, interesting to talk to, good looking and you connect with him. You know, like guys you would date if you met him at the supermarket or at regular bar. Saying you'd never date a guy who wasn't rich is like a guy saying he'd never date a girl with small breasts. Granted, a SC is one of the worst places to meet a future S/O but you never know!

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    Senior Member aberrant's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    There's a big difference between dating a customer you met in the club or just having a SO who frequents clubs.
    I personally wouldn't do either, because I am selfish and if a guy wants to blow money on a pretty girl it should be me

    You don't have to be rich to be a good tipper.

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    Member Easy Mark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    So, most dancers it seems would never date a customer, and few customers seem to be comfortable dating a dancer because these people are now some kind of "damaged goods" or something.

    I think the negative stereotype that dancing for a living carries is so pervasive that dancers themselves think there's something "wrong" with men who enjoy going to SC's even if they think there's nothing "wrong" with dancing. Quite a double standard. Perhaps everyone would be better off to not be so judgmental up front.

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    Senior Member aberrant's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    I love how you don't actually address anything anyone said in their posts, and say 'most dancers' based on a sample size of 2.

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    Well maybe he's funny, interesting to talk to, good looking and you connect with him. You know, like guys you would date if you met him at the supermarket or at regular bar. Saying you'd never date a guy who wasn't rich is like a guy saying he'd never date a girl with small breasts. Granted, a SC is one of the worst places to meet a future S/O but you never know!
    Not sure where the rich part comes in, but I said yes if you date a man who is a big tipper you risk losing money. I never said I would only date rich guys, but no I wouldn't date a man who never tipped, why would I? More than likely he is someone who is cheap and I am not going to support a man I am dating. Sure he could be a man I met someplace else but the fact is I didn't meet him anywhere else, that makes a difference. The reality is where you meet someone depends on how you proceed. The current man I am interested in I met through an activity I am involved in and we share mutual friends. With this situation I have to take it a different way than say I met him online, or in a club or anywhere else.

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    So, most dancers it seems would never date a customer, and few customers seem to be comfortable dating a dancer because these people are now some kind of "damaged goods" or something.

    I think the negative stereotype that dancing for a living carries is so pervasive that dancers themselves think there's something "wrong" with men who enjoy going to SC's even if they think there's nothing "wrong" with dancing. Quite a double standard. Perhaps everyone would be better off to not be so judgmental up front.
    My problem with men who go to clubs is because I know how many act in clubs. For every guy who treats it like entertainment there is another who thinks the stripper will have sex with him. Not to mention in many clubs now some extras are the norm and I wouldn't like the idea of knowing my boyfriend got a lap dance or more from a stripper.

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    Member Easy Mark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    My problem with men who go to clubs is because I know how many act in clubs. For every guy who treats it like entertainment there is another who thinks the stripper will have sex with him. Not to mention in many clubs now some extras are the norm and I wouldn't like the idea of knowing my boyfriend got a lap dance or more from a stripper.
    Well, if I had a S/O I doubt I'd go to clubs. In fact, when I DID have S/O's I didn't! LOL I'd rather be with someone I loved than dropping money at a SC.

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    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    If I had an SO I would take her to clubs with me. If she didn't like the idea she probably wouldn't be my SO....

    As far as Doc's question the reasons for not doing it from a dancer's perspective are many, the reasons to do it are few. In fact there is only really one.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    So, most dancers it seems would never date a customer, and few customers seem to be comfortable dating a dancer because these people are now some kind of "damaged goods" or something.

    I think the negative stereotype that dancing for a living carries is so pervasive that dancers themselves think there's something "wrong" with men who enjoy going to SC's even if they think there's nothing "wrong" with dancing. Quite a double standard. Perhaps everyone would be better off to not be so judgmental up front.
    Well, life is complicated, so are strip clubs. That being said, on this thread and on many others over the years the ladies have always been very forthcoming on why they don't generally date customers. First, foremost and always at the top of the list is loss of revenue. A guy who is spending big on a dancer in a club is putting himself in a situation where said dancer is not going to want to lose his contributions to her regular income. Of course, a cheap-ass loser who sits at the bar says he "doesn't do dances" and asks for phone numbers isn't going to get anywhere either. Yeah, it's complicated.

    Dancers are women first and dancers second. These girls see the way guys act in clubs and they can see the future in regards to how guys will most likely continue to act in clubs even if they are dating a dancer. Even though a good dancer banks every night on the power of libido over common sense it doesn't mean she wants to be with a guy who will blow his money on other women in strip clubs. Is that hypocritical? Not in the least. It is however another reason why dancers generally don't date customers.

    Sorry EM but I don't buy into this whole theory of dancers seeing themselves as damaged goods. Maybe some do but the ones I'm friends with or have dated certainly do not. If anything they see themselves as special and worthy of a man that will treat them with the respect that any woman deserves...and yes, they know that most guys who hit on them at work are not going to treat them the way they want to be treated. In other words, it's not them, it's us.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    over the years the ladies have always been very forthcoming on why they don't generally date customers. First, foremost and always at the top of the list is loss of revenue..
    If she's choosing between money and love, she won't ever find love. That's like saying you won't date a guy who doesn't tip in Benjamins.




    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Dancers are women first and dancers second. These girls see the way guys act in clubs and they can see the future in regards to how guys will most likely continue to act in clubs even if they are dating a dancer. Even though a good dancer banks every night on the power of libido over common sense it doesn't mean she wants to be with a guy who will blow his money on other women in strip clubs. Is that hypocritical? Not in the least. It is however another reason why dancers generally don't date customers..
    This is a sweeping generalization which is why MOST customers are bad prospects. But in life most MEN are bad prospects. Even in the universe of a SC, good men do turn up. Just like many dancers are complex women who would make wonderful wives and mothers. Not all, maybe not even most...but life is the same way. A soul mate is very hard to find, so I wouldn't discount anyone off the top.

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Sorry EM but I don't buy into this whole theory of dancers seeing themselves as damaged goods. Maybe some do but the ones I'm friends with or have dated certainly do not. If anything they see themselves as special and worthy of a man that will treat them with the respect that any woman deserves...and yes, they know that most guys who hit on them at work are not going to treat them the way they want to be treated. In other words, it's not them, it's us.
    I agree that most dancers have pride in their work; that's how they make the most money. But they see the outside world as seeing them and as an extention their customers as 'damaged goods' which was my point. As for the customers, yes, 99.9% are bad prospects due to lack of manners, intelligence, marital status, etc. But considering these women meet thousands of men, chances are occasionally one shows up that's worthwhile.

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    If she's choosing between money and love, she won't ever find love. That's like saying you won't date a guy who doesn't tip in Benjamins.
    That is NOT what anyone is saying. What is being said is if a guy spends a lot of money and she dates him the money could stop. It has nothing to do with the outside world at all and no I rarely judged a man by how much he made unless he was a bum. In the club I judged by how much he spent and most dancers, at least one who work for years become this way. Dancers are there because they make money.






    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    This is a sweeping generalization which is why MOST customers are bad prospects. But in life most MEN are bad prospects. Even in the universe of a SC, good men do turn up. Just like many dancers are complex women who would make wonderful wives and mothers. Not all, maybe not even most...but life is the same way. A soul mate is very hard to find, so I wouldn't discount anyone off the top.
    The strip club is a fantasy and sure there are good people who come in all the time, but like I said it's generally not a place where dancers meet their husbands, it's a JOB like no other.



    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    I agree that most dancers have pride in their work; that's how they make the most money. But they see the outside world as seeing them and as an extention their customers as 'damaged goods' which was my point. As for the customers, yes, 99.9% are bad prospects due to lack of manners, intelligence, marital status, etc. But considering these women meet thousands of men, chances are occasionally one shows up that's worthwhile.
    I am not damaged goods and most of the women here are not. In fact those dancers who really are damaged don't last long without serious issues like drug abuse. I honestly didn't care what my customers saw in me as long as they were spending. Many of my customers were really great guys and had I met them outside maybe I would have dated them but I met them in a situation where I was a fantasy.

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    Senior Member aberrant's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    This thread was made to get feedback from dancers on their perceived pro's and cons of dating customers.
    It seems to me that you (Easy Mark) derailed it when you did not like the responses (ie: dating customers is awesome!) and that you instead chose to turn it into your personal quest to convince strippers that it's possible to find true love with that guy who just stuck a 20$ in your g string.

    Don't go to a thread that is asking for peoples opinions, and proceed to judge and insult them for said opinions. Srsly.


    ALSO, I think you're getting dating and love mixed up. Most people aren't in love when they begin dating. I'm sure if a woman fell madly in love with a long term regular and thought it would work, she would give up the money. However it would be a bad business plan if you dated every cute nice customer you had a little chemistry with.
    What it comes down to is pretty much what kellydancer said above, stripping is a job and a strip club is a work place. Trying to get a date at your place of work is highly irresponsible and unprofessional, it doesn't make you judgemental.
    Last edited by aberrant; 09-20-2012 at 04:11 PM. Reason: Failboating at recognizing the OP

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by aberrant View Post
    This thread was made under the pretense of getting feedback from dancers on their perceived pro's and cons of dating customers.
    It seems to me that because you did not receive the responses you wanted (ie: dating customers is awesome!) that you instead chose to turn it into your personal quest to convince strippers that it's possible to find true love with that guy who just stuck a 20$ in your g string.

    Don't make a thread asking for peoples opinions, then proceed to judge and insult them for said opinions. Srsly.
    Um...

    Doc Holiday started the thread and he hasn't posted a word here since his original post. It sounds to me like you are taking issue with Easy Mark's POV here. That's fine but don't blame him for starting a thread under false pretenses when he didn't actually start the thread.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by Easy Mark View Post
    If she's choosing between money and love, she won't ever find love. That's like saying you won't date a guy who doesn't tip in Benjamins.
    She's not "choosing" between money and love. She is coming to work to make a living. You just can't seem to let go of the fact that dancers don't view the clubs that they work in as singles bars. You are not a prospective mate. You are either a customer or you are in the way.
    Last edited by yoda57us; 09-20-2012 at 04:15 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    ^Seriously. A strip club isn't a supermarket or a bar on a Friday night-it's my workplace. I'm not there to fall in love, I'm there to pay my rent. I think that's what customers forget.

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  28. #20
    Senior Member aberrant's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    Um...

    Doc Holiday started the thread and he hasn't posted a word here since his original post. It sounds to me like you are taking issue with Easy Mark's POV here. That's fine but don't blame him for starting a thread under false pretenses when he didn't actually start the thread.
    Derp. totally my bad, I'll edit that

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    That's what I don't think he gets, dancers are there for the money ONLY. I should add that the type of men I wanted in the clubs were not the type I date in real life. In the club many of my regulars were older, overweight, unattractive, etc. In real life I generally didn't date men like them but in the club I gave them attention because they spent money (and were almost always nice guys).

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    IMO, as long as she still considers him one of the customers or he still considers her one of the dancers, its pretty hard to see how both of them would consider it dating.
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

    If you're in your twenties and aren't a liberal, you have no heart. If you're in you're forties and aren't a conservative, you have no brain - Winston Churchill

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    EM, try this: change the club to an office. Does the average person, male or female, walk into his or her office thinking, "Gee, my main goal today is to find a significant other"? Does a mechanic go into his garage thinking he's only working there to find a girlfriend? Does a lawyer only work in her firm because she's really hoping to find a husband?

    Same thing for dancers and the club setting.

    A dancer goes to work to make money. Boom. That's it. She's not there trolling for bf material. In fact, the SC crowd has a SMALLER percentage of decent guys since either a) most guys in there aren't respectful or b) if they are respectful OTC, they think that walking into an SC gives them license to be an animal. So by that logic, a girl is actually MORE ADVERSE to looking for a potential boyfriend in the club.

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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Most redundant thread EVER.

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    Member Easy Mark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Pros and Cons of dating a customer

    Quote Originally Posted by mediocrity View Post
    Most redundant thread EVER.
    It's sure turned out that way. Oh well...such is life.

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