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Thread: Conflicted

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    Dizzy Conflicted

    I did my first day. I have very mixed emotions about the whole business. I'm becoming unsure if it is something I should be in. As I'm to understand at my club they make the most money from vip rooms and private lapdances. I gave one lapdance and I couldn't take it too seriously at all. I was fine and everything was going well then he said to me "I got all you need, a big dick and a ton of cash." I honestly laughed. Shortly after he paid he went to another girl for one. He at some point reached down his pants to adjust himself and tried to get me to do the whole 'dry hump' thing. No offense but I'm not gonna do that. I don't wanna touch another dudes junk when my boyfriend is worried sick at home as it is. Although he's being very supportive I know he is worried. Another thing is that all of the girls shake their asses inches from the customers face when they come up to tip. In my mind it seems disrespectful for me to do. If those are the things they get good money from when I go home from work with $40 am I really cut out for this business-working 9 hours days and not keeping up too well. What should I do? I'm not saying any of these ladies are wrong for how they work, but for me to do it doesn't feel right. My biggest problem is that I love dancing. I love that aspect of it but it isn't giving me much money.

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    Default Re: Conflicted

    Well if you have problems with dancing inches away and the dry hump and feel uncomfortable I'd suggest you stay away for this. Try doing something else. You can adapt to it and have a stronger mind set next time something happens. Either way choose what you want best for yourself and your partner.

  3. #3
    Moderator Aurora_Sunset's Avatar
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    Sounds like you work in an area where this is the norm, and is, quite honestly, pretty "tame" as far as contact is concerned in clubs. I consider shaking my ass in customers' faces at stage/rubbing my boobs in their face and "grinding" sort of lapdances par for the course in my area, and from what I've heard and read on here, many people would consider my part of the country "lame" and "low-contact."

    There are some things you can get away with not doing (you probably could not shake your ass in customers' faces if you can find something else enticing to do... I refuse to stage-dive into customers' laps with my crotch in their face like some other girls at my club, and I still manage to make tips on stage), but there are other things - like a standard lapdance, where if you don't get with it, you won't make money. The aspects of stripping are not something I've ever had to "force" myself to do - once I started doing it, it was just "this is what I do." It never felt shameful or disrespectful. I don't think about my bf when I'm giving a lapdance. I don't think about my self-respect "waning" when I shake my ass for a customer at stage. It instantly became routine for me, and at the end of the night, I just go home with my money and don't dwell on it.

    If it doesn't feel right to you, don't do it. The "dancing" aspect is all but nil in regards to you making money at this job. Whether it's right or wrong, good or bad, that this is how stripping is nowadays, it is what it is. And if you're not comfortable doing it, you should find something different.
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    Veteran Member britchick85's Avatar
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    You have to find your own comfort levels.But if your comfort levels are significantly lower than the other girls you are working with you will probably struggle to make money.

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    Senior Member xGeminix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    I don't think it's a right fit for you... but give it a few more days.

    I realize that's how the dancers at my club make their money, so I got to do what I got to do. But I don't have a boyfriend nor even want one right now...

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    Featured Member zivlet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    I would say give it a few more shifts and if you're STILL unhappy with it, it may be not for you.
    I have had a few different jobs and done a few different ventures in my life (think animal rescuing, motorcyling, van driving,camping, moshpit diving,horseriding, ANYTHING that other people do too, and Ican honestly say they were all pretty daunting at first, then I began to love them.

    I've had nights from starting out to even quite recently where I've thought 'Ugh this isn't for me!'

    But, think about whether you will regret NOT giving it a few more chances, or whether you will regret GIVING it a few more chances.
    Shaking an ass in somebody's face, maybe you're thinking 'Eeew I wouldn't want an ass shaken in MY face!!'

    That's the wrong thing to think. Most men like asses shaken in their face. It doesn't hurt me to do it but if I thought about it properly, I might think 'Eeew' too. You're selling a product, you're not 'Being you' whilst at work.

    Good luck whatever you decide.
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    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    Quote Originally Posted by PixieKat View Post
    My biggest problem is that I love dancing. I love that aspect of it but it isn't giving me much money.
    I have been dancing for 8 years, 54 clubs, 4 countries. i have yet to see anywhere where making money stripping has anything to do with "dancing."

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    Featured Member SuperJa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    Quote Originally Posted by shasta View Post
    I have been dancing for 8 years, 54 clubs, 4 countries. i have yet to see anywhere where making money stripping has anything to do with "dancing."
    Ding ding ding ding


    If you want to 'dance', go join a burlesque group or something.

    Stripping is mostly sales and acting. And the infamous lap dances, which aren't really dances. It's more like, "Look at my titties, here is my butt. Oh my god I have a vagina, isn't that awesome? K pay me."

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  13. #9
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    Default Re: Conflicted

    ^This.
    It isn't for everyone and if you decide aren't comfortable with dancing at a sc, then maybe you could try burlesque, go go or even cage dancing (if any clubs near you have this).

    If you are trying your hand at dancing because you really need the money-lingerie/topless waitress jobs can pay well too (more than most day jobs anyway).

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