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Thread: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

  1. #1
    Veteran Member Amareth's Avatar
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    Default Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I've been dancing for about 4 and a half years and despite have good days and bad days I've always generally enjoyed it. Until about 4 months ago, now I dread going into work every night and barely make anything when I'm there, it has been quiet lately but also my hustle has just been way off. I've never been so over it before!

    I know it's not a simple burnout because I just took two months off and only started again this week. I thought I'd be happy when I was back on stage and making money but nope, no money and still no hustle.

    Has anyone else experienced this after such a long time dancing? Maybe it's because I put so much effort into my stages and not only do I barely get tipped - I barely get an applause. Maybe it's because I started seeing someone a few months ago I've become less tolerant of guys bullshit - though the last and only other time I dated someone while dancing it didn't affect me. Maybe it's because I've realised I don't really know what other job I can do at this point, I'm about to start teaching pole dancing at a local studio but that certainly won't be enough to live off and the thought of being trapped in this industry scares me for the fist time since started - I've always had the mentality that I'd do this into my 30s but now I don't know.

    Any advice? Any other career strippers here go through this? I'd really love the opinions of women who've been doing this 5-10+ years but any advice on how to get me out of this rut would be welcome!
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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    If your club has been slow then maybe you are feeling burnout after too many dissapointing shifts? I know this happens to me in the summer. I don't have much advice, unfortunately. I just hang in there and suck it up until I have a good night, and then I feel refreshed and like I got my hustle back.

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    Veteran Member mia_fey's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I'm going through the same thing right now. In my opinion it could be the low tolerance for BS like you said. Not due to your new relationship though but what I like to refer to as customer burnout not the job itself. I'm sorry I don't have good advice but I do feel your pain. Keep your chin up girl I hope you get the breakthrough you're looking for.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    Can you try another club or another city for awhile? When I've gotten burnt out in the past, I've found a change of scenery helps me a lot. Or sometimes, if I'm excited about what I'm going to spend my money on that can make things easier too. I get pretty excited about traveling, so I would tell myself that if I made x amount of dollars, then I can take a trip to Montreal for a weekend. Or saving up for a new toy/gadget, a big night on the town, a trip to the spa, etc.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    Coming from someone who has been n the industry for over 15 years(off and on)...imho, ur new girl flare has prolly worn off..U realize this industry is very shallow and doesnt really give a shit about u...After customers have seen u for a few years consistently they lose interest and stop tipping that is if ur bar/s have alot of regulars..At around 23/24 I noticed my new girl flare dropped..At that time I had gained a few pounds and with the fact I had been dancing n this area 4-5 years at that point I noticed there were no longer 4-6 regulars out to see me every night anymore...Im not sure if all of this pertains to u exactly just saying that this job loses its zest after a few years have gone by...Everyone here has offered some great suggestions..Work less is what i did and it helps..Too many days in a row going into work can make ur stomach turn and u can get so fucking sick of looking at people..I know thats why i only work 3-4 days a week....Sometimes less is more.U just have to pick the peak times to go nto work if u have that ability to control ur schedule..

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    Veteran Member Amareth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    Thanks everyone, I should've mentioned I have switched clubs after my two months off I'm now dancing through an agency that sends me around different clubs and pays me for stages so it's nice not having as much pressure to sell dances.

    Last night I just decided to not worry about making money from dances at all and the first guys I spoke to were really nice and I ended up chatting and drinking with them for over an hour - which I know is terrible hustle but I did it to have a fun night not a profitable one. In the end those guys got $200 worth of dances, I did a couple of dances for another guy and made decent stage tips so went home with 3x what I did he night before, meaning I had an average night but still better than a crap one and left in a good mood which to me means it was a good night.

    @shift_6x thank you for your advice but yeah, I've never been in one club more than about 8 months, I travel around different cities and countries a lot, I do agree with the bit about realising the industry doesn't give a shit about you!

    The club I'm working in next week is said to have really good managers and a lot of nice regulars that tip every stage, then after that I'm flying to a different province and working in another club I worked at earlier in the year where I get along with the managers and staff really well and [hopefully] still have a couple regulars there. Plus when I'm there it's close enough to my bf that he can drive down and see me on his days off

    Things are slowly starting to look up finally!
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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    Quote Originally Posted by Amareth View Post
    Thanks everyone, I should've mentioned I have switched clubs after my two months off I'm now dancing through an agency that sends me around different clubs and pays me for stages so it's nice not having as much pressure to sell dances.

    Last night I just decided to not worry about making money from dances at all and the first guys I spoke to were really nice and I ended up chatting and drinking with them for over an hour - which I know is terrible hustle but I did it to have a fun night not a profitable one. In the end those guys got $200 worth of dances, I did a couple of dances for another guy and made decent stage tips so went home with 3x what I did he night before, meaning I had an average night but still better than a crap one and left in a good mood which to me means it was a good night.

    @shift_6x thank you for your advice but yeah, I've never been in one club more than about 8 months, I travel around different cities and countries a lot, I do agree with the bit about realising the industry doesn't give a shit about you!

    The club I'm working in next week is said to have really good managers and a lot of nice regulars that tip every stage, then after that I'm flying to a different province and working in another club I worked at earlier in the year where I get along with the managers and staff really well and [hopefully] still have a couple regulars there. Plus when I'm there it's close enough to my bf that he can drive down and see me on his days off

    Things are slowly starting to look up finally!

    I understand u travel around..here we have home bars and after several years of regularly dancing the bar regs get sick of u and dont tip here..Not the story for u luckily...Good for u glad u had a good night.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I'm going through this after dancing continuously less than two years!!! I think it's the fact that in slow season I have one great shift every other month, one good shift a month, and lots of crap in between. I lowered my bills in half this summer to lower the pressure so I could take shifts off if needed. I loved dancing before and now hate it. If the money isn't there and all the guys just want to get extras, I can't hang.
    I've also noticed that guys have gotten far more sexually aggressive lately-- you can say no, but you literally have to slap, choke, hit, pin down, etc in order to get dances.
    Everyone I work with complains about this, so I know I'm not alone. I just don't think I want to do all this for less than 5 dances an hour. If it doesn't pick back up this month as projected, I'm doing something else with my life and making dancing a side gig.
    So, no, you're not alone.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    Take a vacation!!! Take some time to enjoy the money that you earn. Save save save, but let yourself enjoy as well. If you don't.....work will seem pointless.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I think when you're new it's easier to have fun with the job because it's exciting and new. Newer girls always seem to get so pumped up and I'm certain customers interpret that as being fun and social and enjoying work. I think you had a better night when you weren't worrying because the first guys sensed you were in it for the good time then others that were observing saw that you were a fun girl. When I'm not feeling like working but need to I make sure to leave my house excited for what all my hard work will pay off for and do whatever it takes to hold on to that energy. Always try to entertain yourself in some way and look busy even if you don't think money is there. I think it's super important to always believe you're going to make money starting from when you're getting ready at home for work.. even if it's the end of the night remember that it just takes one good customer walking in the door to change everything. The biggest sucker of my mood, I dunno about you, is other dancers and staff.. so I try to keep to myself or hang around girls that are ready to work. As soon as someone's complaining it makes me doubt why I'm even there.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I tried something that worked for me tonight... instead of trying to believe I would make good money and use positive thoughts, I decided I DESERVED to make great money and would. I decided the universe owed it to me.
    I made better money than I had in three weeks!

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I am feeling soo burnt out, maybe i wil work less in Jan, fml.
    xoxo

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    One thing that helps me is to think of all the things dancing has paid for and use the length of time I've been dancing as an incentive to do well. "Since I've been doing this 6 years it should be no problem for me to make money." I also noticed that on days I don't want to be there I try to spend the least amount of energy on stage (I still get tips too) and save my energy for the clients I sit with.

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    I had a dip like that after working for three years, and actually quit for a little over a year before going back into the industry very recently. Having that year off really afforded me the "20/20" vision of hindsight, and helped me understand WHY I hated stripping so much at the end of the first phase of my stripper career (Won't go into that here!). It also became very clear to me that the times I had fun and was HAPPY at work, I was attracting good customers, making more money, and dealing with less B.S.

    The minute I started feeling negative about the industry, the industry (customers, managers, and girls alike) did a damn good job of perpetuating my negativity by throwing negative situations at me!

    I really believe the energy you have is the energy you attract.

    What helps me get out of that negative headspace is first identifying it, and then rejecting it. Before you start work, spend five to ten minutes VISUALIZING your ideal situation. For me that's laughing with and dancing for a customer I actually enjoy the company of in VIP/a suite (actually imagine going through the motions of dancing, the compliments he would give you, etc.) Picture A SPECIFIC scenario that made you enjoy stripping in the first place (not for a minute or two, but for 5-10 minutes, in a quiet space, with your eyes closed), and it *truly* will bring your energy level back up.

    Athletes prepare for races this way -- by visualizing their success in the most graphic way possible. EKGs have shown the same areas of their brains are active during the visualization process, as are active during the actual physical activity.

    This shit works!!

    Hope things look up for you!

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    Default Re: Mid Stripper-Life Crisis?

    Oops! Double post...

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