Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 27

Thread: Horrifying First Experience

  1. #1
    Member Juliette Gunn's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    17
    Thanks
    26
    Thanked 20 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Horrifying First Experience

    Five months ago I turned on my webcam on MFC. Guys popped in and out in seconds, some stayed but said nothing. Then after a minute in, I was getting a bunch of private and public messages. I couldn't handle them all, so I focused on three that actually wrote a sentence from beginning to end. I spent another minute talking to them. They were the ultimate douchebags.

    Panic settled in the third minute. I didn't want to have to talk to these mindless rude jerks who most likely aren't going to ever tip because guys that tip aren't the ones that sound like they're already wanking off.

    Almost all the guys in the room left and new ones came and left after not more than ten seconds.

    In my mind, I was thinking, because I'm not ramming dildos up my butt, I'm not interesting. Because I can't stroke the egos of douchebags, I'm not good. So many messages, demands, rudeness, I became overwhelmed. These are the people I have to impress to tip me... I disconnected myself and I was shaking hard all over, then I starting sobbing and crying my eyes out.

    This is what has happened to humanity? Has it always been like this? These men are worst than anything movies can come up with for twisted characters. I will never webcam ever again.

    That's my history, and two weeks ago I tried again. This time I went in after a shot of vodka and two glasses of wine.

    It was 1:27PM and I was super nervous. I am on Streamate because I heard guys are tamer there. Two minutes in, no one has come into my room. I began to get even more nervous. Three minutes in, two people entered. I panicked and closed the tab.

    Why is this so hard? I blamed trauma from MFC, but I was ready this time, I was also pretty much drunk. What are guys expecting when they enter? What am I suppose to do? I really don't want to spend a long time talking to guys who are freeloaders. I also have the tendency to mumble or stutter so I don't want to speak out loud. But I really want to be able to do this.

  2. #2
    Senior Member KrystleX's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Bonny Scotland
    Posts
    151
    Thanks
    288
    Thanked 257 Times in 71 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Oh babe, that sounds awful... I'm really sorry to hear that your first time went so bad.

    I can't really offer any site specific advice as I don't use MFC or Streamate (yet) but I believe on MFC you can mute guests and basics. Guests, from what I can tell, are mostly a bunch of nob heads anyway, so I doubt they'd have anything decent to contribute to your chat window, heh.

    As for confidence... I know it's hard but I suggest spending a little time thinking about your alternative personality. Once you have a rough idea what you want to be like on cam then start getting into character before heading onto cam. Believe you are that other person... once you're in that mindset it will be easier... remember, a massive portion of this profession is acting. Once you work on the act, the rest will slide into place.

    Watch a tonne of porn.. maybe even keep it playing somewhere in the background to keep you in the mood. Don't get disheartened by clowns on the internet. It happens to all of us; whether you're a new model or a long time vet. You just have to build up a thick skin. Don't even show a hint of reaction when they are rude or abusive... just smile sweetly while you hunt for the ban button and boot there arse into the ether.

    Have another go it. Give yourself a wee goal. Set aside a set amount of time to be on cam and DON'T log off no matter how crappy it gets.

    The guys who are popping in and out of your room and not speaking to you may just be scouting around the site trying to decide which model to spend their pennies on... if you hang around for a good while you may find they come back in.

    Don't just sit there either. Have a natter with your cam image about current affairs, a book you've recently read, your favourite cocktails, computer games you like... involve your invisible audience by trying to get debates going... I don't know. You'll find your forte soon enough and when you do.. WORK IT, chick!

    Good luck x
    Crystal Song
    Twitter
    AdultWork


  3. #3
    Member theclairebear's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    18
    Thanks
    49
    Thanked 40 Times in 9 Posts
    My Mood
    Inspired

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    In my opinion you gave up to soon.

    A lot of guys will enter a room, not like you, and leave. It is nothing wrong with you, it just means your not their type. They are looking for their perfect girl when they cruise these cam sites.

    If you get a lot of pms and have trouble keeping tabs of them all, set your pms to "friends only" on MFC. That way none of the guys can PM you unless you add them, there will be less time wasters when its kept to public chat, because OTHER members/customers will see the stupid shit they request.

    Learn to stroke mens egos, in a way as a camgirl it becomes your job. Men aren't just paying you to ram dildos into every hole you can, they are also paying you to feel desired. They want to think you enjoy this as much as they do.

    There will always be demands when camming, its best to know and state your limits early on. If anyone gets too pushy ban them, and don't loss sleep over it.

    Yes the men we cam for can be like this, you just have to get over it, or get another job. (to be blunt)

    You shouldn't have to drink in order to do this, if you must then this is not the right job for you.

    You are also sabotaging yourself by giving up early. The only girls that get privates the minute they log in, are girls with fanbases. They got these fanbases by being online and reliable, aka not just leaving when nobody pops into their room right away.

    What should you do? Smile, sit pretty, and treat this like a job. Work even when you don't feel like it, stay longer than 15 minutes, put up with getting to know your customers. What we do is still retail, only difference is we are selling ourselves. If you aren't available, your not making sales.

    Side Note: a little self esteem wouldn't hurt, this isn't the line of work for anyone without thick skin, and you seem fairly insecure. "In my mind... I'm not interesting...I'm not good" These thoughts are toxic. You have a low opinion of yourself, so you assume that men have the same opinions, men that haven't even gotten to know you. My advice, start thinking your perfect, because otherwise thousands of stupid meaningless comments are going to drag you down. Just about every time I cam I have at least one guy insult me, they do it to drag you down (because they are broke and don't like the idea of having to pay for it, because you wouldn't submit to their demands, because they want your attention, or even because they just like being mean), you cannot let it get to you.


  4. #4
    Veteran Member KimKlass's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2012
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    465
    Thanks
    502
    Thanked 2,033 Times in 380 Posts
    My Mood
    Amused

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    I'm sorry your first times were so stressful! My two cents:

    You have GOT to develop a thicker skin, or you will not do well camming. That is just the naked truth, and not meant to be harsh. You have to not give a fuck when these guys act like assholes. Let those guys roll off your back; don't even let them be a blip on your radar. They do not matter. The only person who matters is YOU, and what you think of yourself. Also, your decent customers matter, but you will never get them you log off in THREE minutes. I'm not trying to be rude, but did you think you would get the hang of things in three minutes? It takes months, sometimes longer, to hit a point where you feel you know what you're doing. But in order to get to that point, you have BE on cam. You have to put in the hours, put in the planning, the strategizing, all that. Camming is exactly like having your own business, and you need to treat it that way if you want to make money. If you don't go to work, and can't handle it when you do, your business will no doubt fail.

    Do you have some sort of anxiety issues? I only ask because you seem to have reacted very strongly to all of this. If so, you've got to get a handle on that as well or it's going to be sooo hard for you. You shouldn't have to drink to be able to tolerate your job. Taking a shot to calm your nerves sometimes is okay, but it's not okay to have to get drunk. It's not healthy for you. I am also by no means saying that even the top cam girls don't get nervous. Some nerves are normal, but breaking down and sobbing after 3 minutes just isn't.

    All is not lost, though. You can still turn things around You just need to remember that a lot of these guys are bored and especially like to fuck with brand new girls. MFC is particularly harsh for newbies, because even good customers there can be really intense. Nothing that they say should be able to make you feel bad about yourself, though.

    Lastly, your time on MFC will be way easier if you turn off PMs to friends only, and charge for friend adds. You do not have to PM these guys. You can't be afraid to tell them "NO" and "Fuck off". You have to control your chat room. You can do it, you just need to have some confidence.
    .
    Follow me on Twitter @KimKlassMFC
    I love visitors when I'm online, so all models are welcome

    profiles.myfreecams.com/kimklass

  5. The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to KimKlass For This Useful Post:


  6. #5
    Veteran Member Rosemary Rabbit's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Westeros
    Posts
    546
    Thanks
    1,813
    Thanked 2,794 Times in 487 Posts
    My Mood
    Cheeky

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    -----
    Last edited by Rosemary Rabbit; 07-10-2017 at 12:41 PM.

  7. The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to Rosemary Rabbit For This Useful Post:


  8. #6
    Veteran Member DoodlebugBites's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Dirty South
    Posts
    342
    Thanks
    1,173
    Thanked 1,089 Times in 276 Posts
    My Mood
    Cheeky

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by Rosemary Rabbit View Post
    I'm probably going to be an echo to things already said, but it sounds like performance anxiety! Even today, after two years, there will be times I am logged on for a whole 3 minutes before unplugging my cam. Then I do this bouncy-hop around my room to shake off the initial wave of nerves!
    Wow, Rosemary! You are such a natural on cam I would have no idea you get this too!

    To the OP, I am too new at this to have much advice, but to echo the great tips above I would say cam at the same hours as much as you can. When I first started, I would want to get online at midnight-ish but between nerves, fiddling with my lights and changing my outfits, it would usually end up being around 4:00 am.

    When I finally got it together to go online earlier, it was like starting over with a room of unfamiliar user names. Last night I decided to go back to my initial time slot and it was SOOOO nice seeing names I recognized and some previous customers. I was so much more relaxed and they were happy I remembered them. Even just one friendly person stopping by will make your job easier.

  9. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to DoodlebugBites For This Useful Post:


  10. #7
    Veteran Member BlondebombGA's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    513
    Thanks
    1,005
    Thanked 880 Times in 262 Posts
    My Mood
    Yeehaw

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Oh honey, I'm sorry. Why not try to ease yourself into it. When you first go on, only put the cam pointing at your shoulder, until you can calm down and chat a bit. Turn on some music so it doesn't feel so lonely. Pretend you are talking to someone PM'ing you. Literally do something else, like answering emails etc. so your focus isn't on every, single person who pops in. In the long run this probably isn't the way to make $$, but maybe, just maybe it will help take the initial anxiety down. DO NOT respond to those that are rude. Even if they were going to spend money on you, are those the kinds of custies you want?? You are a new girl, so unfortunately you are like fresh meat, and some of these guys will try to take advantage of that, and your "innocence".

    Do not base your success on pop in/ pop out guys. I get that too, and sometimes these guys are just window shopping. The ones who decide later, after browsing, that I am the girl for the night come back and get a show. Some don't because I am simply not their type. And that is ok. When first starting, didn't you ever browse around popping in different rooms to see what it was like? Like a previous comment said, thicken that skin baby. It is not always about you. So do not give them that power. We are entertainment sweetheart, and to some of these guys we may as well be virtual. Expect some guys to not say goodbye or thank you. Hell, some guys may not even remember they have had a show with you before, even though you know that they have. Some men have so many sexual hangups, that they are unable to connect with a woman who gives them sexual gratification. But hang in there, and I guarantee you will also come across men who make you feel like the most beautiful creature on earth, and actually pay money to be in your presence.

    A very wise person on here said, (I'm sorry I can't remember) "Never act like you NEED their money." This is an acting job love. Desperately broke this week? Hide it. Not feeling pretty and like a top bitch? Fake it til you make it. Give yourself more time honey before you make a sweeping judgement based on a few interactions. Plus you have the ladies here.


  11. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to BlondebombGA For This Useful Post:


  12. #8
    Senior Member Heather7679's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    119
    Thanks
    785
    Thanked 403 Times in 73 Posts
    My Mood
    Relaxed

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    You have to understand too everyone thinks he's a tough guy from behind the keyboard. Oh and also rich, hot, and with a 14in dick. Yeah, right buddy!
    You could be the prettiest girl alive and they will still throw insults at you when you don't give in to their pathetic whiny begging. All that matters is YOU and how YOU feel. When guys are rude i laugh it off, knowing I probably make more money in an hour or 2 than he does all day.

  13. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Heather7679 For This Useful Post:


  14. #9
    Veteran Member annabellz's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    383
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked 800 Times in 260 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    You should try this-

    Go into another girls room, not a top model, try to find someone similar to you, someone whos not too busy,but busy enough (ie not going to be swept into prvt) maybe someone whos doing a gold show countdown and shadow her. Pretend youre her. Talk to your screen. Pretend the guys are talking to YOU and not HER.

    It sounds like youre just really uncomfortable with the whole chat environment. Probably because you never spent anytime in it. So spending time observing will do you good.

  15. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to annabellz For This Useful Post:


  16. #10
    Veteran Member Vela Valentine's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Midwest, USA
    Posts
    269
    Thanks
    457
    Thanked 702 Times in 175 Posts
    My Mood
    Dead

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    I also spent a TON of time shadowing other girls to see what it was like, what was expected of me from the guys, and how other girls dealt with the mean guys! All those PMs scared the crap out of me too, so don't be scared -- be you! I am also very intimidated by MFC, mostly because I don't know how to use the website yetm but I'm very comfortable with SM. Perhaps try SM for now until you generally get comfortable with camming as a whole and then go back to MFC and try it again?

    xoxoxox


  17. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Vela Valentine For This Useful Post:


  18. #11
    Curious Guest
    Joined
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    4
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Sounds like you would be a good fit for MGF. You don't have to cam there at all... no public rooms. But you can if you want to, and when you do, it's one on one with a guy who has already paid.
    MFC traumatized me too. I worked mfc 6-7 days a week for almost a year, and felt the same way you did almost every time I turned on my cam. Ive done so much better with the custies over at MGF.

  19. #12
    Veteran Member GracieBlue's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    582
    Thanks
    2,389
    Thanked 1,049 Times in 367 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    You have my deepest sympathies. I've been camming for almost 6 months. I cried a few times at first too. I just have fun with it. I actually look forward to getting on and hanging out with my regs. I block negative jerks and I just remember they are probably just insecure assholes hiding behind their computers. I hope it gets better for you!

  20. #13
    God/dess SarahTime's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    3,681
    Thanks
    8,041
    Thanked 13,685 Times in 2,854 Posts
    My Mood
    Inspired

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Yikes. Please, please, please don't take this in a rude way because it's not my intention, I just can't think of any other way to put it...... but you need some thicker skin... if you want to cam you need to toughen up. Unfortunately this is just part of what comes with camming on big sites. If you really just cannot handle it, which it sounds to me like you can't, then you could always try indy camming.

    I wouldn't take the sampling of men who came into your room as a representation of humanity. They're just sad internet trolls. There are lots of nice, normal men who frequent cam sites, I think you probably weren't on long enough to let them in.
    xoxo ~ Sarah




  21. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to SarahTime For This Useful Post:


  22. #14
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    190
    Thanks
    15
    Thanked 147 Times in 76 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    if you need to drink before you start doing a job, the chances are you take a really good look at whether this is the right thing for you to be doing with your life

  23. The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to naughtybekie For This Useful Post:


  24. #15
    Senior Member Heather7679's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    119
    Thanks
    785
    Thanked 403 Times in 73 Posts
    My Mood
    Relaxed

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Not necessarily true. I have a glass of wine before work almost every time. makes me feel sexier. at least in my head. lol
    Quote Originally Posted by naughtybekie View Post
    if you need to drink before you start doing a job, the chances are you take a really good look at whether this is the right thing for you to be doing with your life

  25. The Following User Says Thank You to Heather7679 For This Useful Post:


  26. #16
    Featured Member Incantatious's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2011
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    1,732
    Thanks
    5,214
    Thanked 8,267 Times in 1,351 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    I was going to do a long post, but I feel everything that needed to be said has already been said. <3 There is plenty of amazing advice given to you that is wroth a good read through. I hope you are bearing up just fine since you posted your thread here, and that the after-math of camming hasn't stayed with you or haunted you too much.

    Quote Originally Posted by naughtybekie View Post
    if you need to drink before you start doing a job, the chances are you take a really good look at whether this is the right thing for you to be doing with your life
    I absolutely must agree with this. If the job that pays for your living requires you to intoxicate yourself in order to do it, that's a fast-track path straight to becoming alcohol dependent right there. It is a very slippery slope (a lot of people start off saying, "Oh! This is just a one-off!" that rapidly turns into a daily / nightly occurance), that many don't even realize they're stumbling down until they become very, very unwell.

    Best of luck my dear! I feel like you just got into this way too quickly. You need to do your research and fair share of perving on other girls before you throw yourself into the camming world. You never know - if you do a lot of reading, a lot of perving, and a lot of learning, you could be Miss MFC for all you / we know!

    If you want so very badly, just use your passion to success in this to fuel learning about how everything works, put your mind to it, you will get it.

    Grab camming by it's big, hairy, cash-filled balls, and (squeeze) you WILL succeed!




  27. The Following User Says Thank You to Incantatious For This Useful Post:


  28. #17
    Featured Member LaurenAus's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    1,361
    Thanks
    4,892
    Thanked 1,925 Times in 737 Posts
    My Mood
    Cool

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Would you say the same to strippers? Many of them drink on the job to feel comfortable or to work a room and socialize
    Quote Originally Posted by SweetJulia View Post
    everyone I've fucked who was awful in bed should be forced to have sex with each other so they can all, collectively, figure out why I never called them back.

    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Sunset View Post
    Nothing makes me feel like less of an adult than walking into several other people's apartments and realizing we all own the exact same lamp from K-mart.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    The fantasy sold to women through out history that a man will come along & rescue us is a lie.

  29. #18
    God/dess ManyRoses's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    3,103
    Thanks
    1,297
    Thanked 7,598 Times in 1,955 Posts
    Blog Entries
    8
    My Mood
    Breezy

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Oh dear....I am so sorry that you feel so strongly, and so badly about your first couple times trying to cam!! Hugs!

    Now, I am going to say something that has been touched on in some of the earlier posts, and I just want to preface it by saying that this is not a value judgement on YOU by any means. I'm not sure that this is the right industry for you.

    I know that it seems like this is something that "anyone" can do, and even on this board, there is a lot of talk about how anyone can earn money - but honestly, while I think that any age, race, weight, "look", etc can earn money camming, I think that not everyone is suited for it. You need a thick skin, a very friendly nature, an abundance of energy (even when you have spent an hour saying "hey big cock, how are you?" over. and over. and over. with zero conversation or privates) and the ability to kind of - switch off. It is a tough racket, and it is a hard mix to get right. If you have severe anxiety after only a few minutes - enough to leave you in such a bad state - I would worry about your ability to handle some of the stuff that might get thrown at you. Again - not a judgement on you - just honestly that I hate the idea of these douchewads reducing you to tears!!! I don't like the idea of ANYONE feeling that overwhelmed or bad about themselves!! More hugs...

    Like others have said, I don't feel that it is healthy to get to a point where you HAVE to drink in order to work. Before I started in the industry, I had some great advice - don't drink at work for the first week, at least. You have to know that you CAN do it sober, or you will end up a drunk. And bear in mind, I am practically a functional alcoholic! (In a jokey way, obviously) I drink quite a lot, and have at least one glass of wine most days. By no means am I anti-booze! Sometimes I drink when I cam, sometimes I don't. I often find that it is counter-productive though - I get distracted and have too much "fun" - not enough money, and it doesn't train the boys properly. If you feel like you can't bring yourself to log on without getting drunk, this is DEFINITELY not the job for you.

    I am also interested in the timeline to your story - you obviously have another source of income, as you have been able to log in for a few minutes and then not go back for nearly half a year. Why is it that you want to cam, as opposed to what you are doing now? If it is just because you feel like you can make waaaay more money, you may be wrong. Making "big bucks" takes a while to build up to, and if you find it that hard, I honestly would wonder if it is worth it. Ditto if you think that it is easy - clearly, it is going to be very difficult for you, at least for the first little while.

    If you really want to give it another try, then the practical advice the others have given is great - try paid chat only sites, or sticking it out on SM for longer. MFC is definitely a very overwhelming site to start on!! Especially if you are not muting basics, and allowing everyone and anyone to PM you!! SM IS much calmer, but you may be better still on MGF or using paid only in AW. Spend time in other girls chat rooms - watch them. See what they say. Do some deep breathing before you get on cam - I like to do a 10min meditation, and then focus on centering myself as "Scarlett" - getting into character and visualizing an awesome day on cam. It just helps get me in the right frame of mind. Set yourself a small goal - sit on cam for 30 mins, and then build up from there.

    Most importantly - mentally prepare yourself, and get ready to be STRONG. Don't think of it as though you are begging these guys to think that you are good enough - definitely don't put too much importance on the opinions or comments of these guys - as though they really impact your worth. You use the word "panic" a lot - if you don't have an anxiety disorder, then try logically thinking it through. What is the WORST that could happen? You clearly have another income stream, so you aren't going to be out on the street! What is the absolute worst case scenario of a total stranger on the internet rejecting you? What does his opinion matter? You aren't going to die, to be physically hurt, to lose your friends or your family....it's just some dude that chose not to whack off to you at that precise moment. Just repeat to yourself - It's not life or death. It's just porn.

    And bear in mind that if you do decide to work at this and keep going, you WILL eventually deal with guys that are truly horrible. I don't mean freeloaders, or slightly rude guys. I'm talking about the ones that come in to tell you that you are hideous, useless, worthless, a disease-ridden turd, you should just go die, go to hell.....they happen. If you can't handle guys just talking to you, you really won't be able to shake off the TRUE assholes. If you can't make yourself limit your pms, how are you going to be able to insta-ban the really mean ones? Don't force yourself to keep doing this if it is going to totally fuck with your head - it's not worth it.
    I take cash, debit or credit. I just don't take shit.


    OnlyFans.com/ScarlettMoore

    Follow me on twitter! @MissScarlettM

    Hear me ramble about random things:

  30. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to ManyRoses For This Useful Post:


  31. #19
    God/dess ManyRoses's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    3,103
    Thanks
    1,297
    Thanked 7,598 Times in 1,955 Posts
    Blog Entries
    8
    My Mood
    Breezy

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by LaurenAus View Post
    Would you say the same to strippers? Many of them drink on the job to feel comfortable or to work a room and socialize
    For the record, having been a stripper for years before I started camming, a big, vehement YES to this. You should not have to drink to feel comfortable doing what you do. Most strippers drink because most guys prefer it - when I was dancing, I eventually got to a point where I would get the bar to make me "fake" drinks and shots, that actually had no alcohol.

    I would still have a drink when I wanted to, and still do when camming.

    There is a BIG difference between preferring to have a drink at work, and knowing that one or two may make your job a little easier, and not being able to work at all unless you have a buzz on. Just because you CAN do it sober, doesn't mean you have to, but you should know that you have the ability to do your job without a drop in your system.

    If you compare the job to any other job or social event, it makes more sense. If you would rather have a drink before going out to an event or party, that is fine. But if the idea of "socializing" or going to a PR event/staff party/big meeting without having alcohol in your system makes you break out in a cold sweat, in any other industry that would eb recognized as a problem.
    I take cash, debit or credit. I just don't take shit.


    OnlyFans.com/ScarlettMoore

    Follow me on twitter! @MissScarlettM

    Hear me ramble about random things:

  32. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to ManyRoses For This Useful Post:


  33. #20
    Featured Member Incantatious's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2011
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    1,732
    Thanks
    5,214
    Thanked 8,267 Times in 1,351 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by LaurenAus View Post
    Would you say the same to strippers? Many of them drink on the job to feel comfortable or to work a room and socialize
    Yes.

    If I have a friend who "needs" alcohol night by night to do her job, if she just changed her job to stripping instead of camming or baking cookies or whatever for a living... I'd be just as upset that she was alcohol dependent no matter what the job was. Not to mention the damage she would be doing to her system would be just the same. Alcoholism is alcoholism.

    BTW I am not saying the OP is alcohol dependent! By no means at all. I am just saying that requiring alcohol just to do your job is dangerous to your health.




  34. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Incantatious For This Useful Post:


  35. #21
    Member Juliette Gunn's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    17
    Thanks
    26
    Thanked 20 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by ManyRoses View Post

    Like others have said, I don't feel that it is healthy to get to a point where you HAVE to drink in order to work. Before I started in the industry, I had some great advice - don't drink at work for the first week, at least. You have to know that you CAN do it sober, or you will end up a drunk. And bear in mind, I am practically a functional alcoholic! (In a jokey way, obviously) I drink quite a lot, and have at least one glass of wine most days. By no means am I anti-booze! Sometimes I drink when I cam, sometimes I don't. I often find that it is counter-productive though - I get distracted and have too much "fun" - not enough money, and it doesn't train the boys properly. If you feel like you can't bring yourself to log on without getting drunk, this is DEFINITELY not the job for you.

    I am also interested in the timeline to your story - you obviously have another source of income, as you have been able to log in for a few minutes and then not go back for nearly half a year. Why is it that you want to cam, as opposed to what you are doing now? If it is just because you feel like you can make waaaay more money, you may be wrong. Making "big bucks" takes a while to build up to, and if you find it that hard, I honestly would wonder if it is worth it. Ditto if you think that it is easy - clearly, it is going to be very difficult for you, at least for the first little while.

    If you really want to give it another try, then the practical advice the others have given is great - try paid chat only sites, or sticking it out on SM for longer. MFC is definitely a very overwhelming site to start on!! Especially if you are not muting basics, and allowing everyone and anyone to PM you!! SM IS much calmer, but you may be better still on MGF or using paid only in AW. Spend time in other girls chat rooms - watch them. See what they say. Do some deep breathing before you get on cam - I like to do a 10min meditation, and then focus on centering myself as "Scarlett" - getting into character and visualizing an awesome day on cam. It just helps get me in the right frame of mind. Set yourself a small goal - sit on cam for 30 mins, and then build up from there.

    Most importantly - mentally prepare yourself, and get ready to be STRONG. Don't think of it as though you are begging these guys to think that you are good enough - definitely don't put too much importance on the opinions or comments of these guys - as though they really impact your worth. You use the word "panic" a lot - if you don't have an anxiety disorder, then try logically thinking it through. What is the WORST that could happen? You clearly have another income stream, so you aren't going to be out on the street! What is the absolute worst case scenario of a total stranger on the internet rejecting you? What does his opinion matter? You aren't going to die, to be physically hurt, to lose your friends or your family....it's just some dude that chose not to whack off to you at that precise moment. Just repeat to yourself - It's not life or death. It's just porn.

    I have actually been stalking SW for a few years, reading up as much as I can, and for a few months I watched girls on MFC and SM, I didn't just jump right into it, I've have tons of notes and a couple journals dedicated to just webcaming. I've been plotting for very long.

    But when I logged into MFC, it was a completely different experience from all the stalking I've done, the pressure was intense, I wasn't expecting it at all so it threw me into a panic. It's like going to the bathroom to brush your teeth and all of a sudden your friend lunges out of the shower and scares you.

    When those two people came into my room on SM, my mind immediately retrieved the memory of the first time. I only drank so it would help me sit through it long enough to know what to expect the next time.

    I have done plenty of dirty videos with no problem, on my own, with photographers, there was even a time where there were three photographers and a few other models and their boyfriends around watching.

    I grew up always wanting to help everyone, even when they're not a great person, I always help them, even strangers. I dragged it with me when I went on cam and forgot that I was suppose to be someone else. When I used to do those videos, I always became someone else, I had a completely different mindset. I just forgot when I went on cam!

    When I turned eighteen I jumped right into the nude photography which later led to erotica photography and that led to porn. Then I quit modeling entirely because a lot of photographers (especially the ones that call themselves "professional") always end up thinking I want to sleep with them and if that doesn't work they offer a couple hundreds to sleep with them. It doesn't matter if I wave a tazer in their face or not before the shoot, most of them just go brain dead halfway through. My current income comes from cleanning out houses for people to move into. It's dirty labor work that's really unhealthy and doesn't pay well and it's not everyday. Why I want to do webcamming is because I want to have money I can spend on something else other than food and bills. Paid chat only sites sounds like a good idea.

    Thank you everyone!

  36. #22
    Featured Member Incantatious's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2011
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    1,732
    Thanks
    5,214
    Thanked 8,267 Times in 1,351 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by Juliette Gunn View Post
    But when I logged into MFC, it was a completely different experience from all the stalking I've done, the pressure was intense, I wasn't expecting it at all so it threw me into a panic.
    My goodness... you know this brought back memories for me. And you are right.

    The perspective is important, and is something we really need to remember when advising new models to perve on other models as a means of strengthening our knowledge of how to do this job. What we are given from that to go by, is actually extremely limited. It is limited to the polished exterior of what the clients and potential clients see, to what the model wants her audience to see. Any number of things could be happening "behind the scenes", as it were.

    It is a very difference experience being on the "inside"!

    I admit, I did not do NEARLY as much research on how to work MFC than how to work SM, and so when I logged onto MFC for the first time, NOTHING prepared me for how many awfully annoying pop-up messages I'd get! I mean... SO many windows came up. I was just hit with "Uhh... Okay what the FUCK is this shit? O_o" And the layout! Oh my god... the layout of MFC drove me mad. I would be able to actually tell you how to avoid getting those pop-ups if the site didn't confuse me so much. (Something to do with the "friends" and "adding friends" or something...) I still don't like it, but it does get easier.




  37. #23
    God/dess ManyRoses's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    3,103
    Thanks
    1,297
    Thanked 7,598 Times in 1,955 Posts
    Blog Entries
    8
    My Mood
    Breezy

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by Juliette Gunn View Post

    I grew up always wanting to help everyone, even when they're not a great person, I always help them, even strangers. I dragged it with me when I went on cam and forgot that I was suppose to be someone else. When I used to do those videos, I always became someone else, I had a completely different mindset. I just forgot when I went on cam!
    You've hit the nail on the head with this one!! You HAVE to turn yourself off, and stop thinking as the real you, stop thinking of them as "real" people...it sounds really callous, but as you discovered, it's really the only way to do it! Shut it all down, and then you can start to open it up a little as and when you feel like it.

    Your second post makes me feel MUCH better for you - knowing that you have experience in the industry is great! The big difference between photos/filming and camming is the interaction. You are actually talking to people, and if you don't hold yourself apart from them, you can easily be overwhelmed!!

    Get back into that persona - wear it like armor when you are working!! Maybe even take a couple of your old photos and stick them by your computer - so that you are always looking at the person that you are playing while you are on. And if you are a helper and a carer, then you are going to have to find a way to stop thinking of customers as real people - think of them as wallets! Seriously - imagine little wallets with arms and legs sitting at the computer typing and watching you - you can still do all the "getting to know you" "making you feel special" stuff, but don't take it too seriously and let it affect you.
    I take cash, debit or credit. I just don't take shit.


    OnlyFans.com/ScarlettMoore

    Follow me on twitter! @MissScarlettM

    Hear me ramble about random things:

  38. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to ManyRoses For This Useful Post:


  39. #24
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Don't Bother Me, USA
    Posts
    9,937
    Thanks
    12,135
    Thanked 37,400 Times in 8,666 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Will you please go out and buy the book 'Why Men Love Bitches'???!!! It will surely help with men in real life and on cam.

  40. #25
    Member Juliette Gunn's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    17
    Thanks
    26
    Thanked 20 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Horrifying First Experience

    Quote Originally Posted by ManyRoses View Post
    And if you are a helper and a carer, then you are going to have to find a way to stop thinking of customers as real people - think of them as wallets! Seriously - imagine little wallets with arms and legs sitting at the computer typing and watching you - you can still do all the "getting to know you" "making you feel special" stuff, but don't take it too seriously and let it affect you.
    Hahaha! Talking to little wallet people is much easier!

  41. The Following User Says Thank You to Juliette Gunn For This Useful Post:


Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. horrifying mistake.
    By naughty_scottie in forum Newbie Board
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 06-29-2010, 10:47 PM
  2. Your experience so far?
    By rdwwet in forum Newbie Board
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 10-12-2007, 10:51 PM
  3. new experience
    By drd217 in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 03-09-2006, 02:10 AM
  4. In Your Experience...
    By bella622 in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 10-24-2005, 04:32 PM
  5. need help! no experience at all!
    By longhrncutie18 in forum Newbie Board
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 06-09-2005, 03:38 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •