I think my "regular" is trying to have an abusive relationship (dancer-regular club relationship) with me. He is a fairly normal most of the time except that he is very egotistical and likes to tell everybody how rich he is. He is extremely cheap with his money, but he has started to do rooms with me once or twice a week. In this economy this money is significant (a couple of years ago it wouldn't have been and I wouldn't stick around to put up with his craziness). He is also a very bad drunk. Most of the time he is "normal" and we get along. But sometimes when he drinks a switch is flipped inside him and he is twisted, tries to fuck with my head, and is outright delusional. He accuses of me saying offensive things to him and just last night accused me of saying that he was "wasting my time" but he was actually the one who said it to me! I call him out every single time he gets like this and we end up in an argument. I have now walked away from him about 5-7 times. Everytime he this happens he comes into the club and I ignore him. He then comes to my stage and tips me and apologizes. Sometimes I still avoid him for a couple of days, while he still requests me to come sit by him/dance. Eventually a dead night rolls around and I give in. He is aware that he needs to stop drinking and that his behavior is off, but while it's going on he makes me feel like the crazy one. Other people in the club are starting to recognize his behavior. I think he is used to having abusive relationships. I had an abusive childhood and am just recently realizing (after some research) that I have a tendency to put up with abusive treatment because it's pretty normal to me and I also feel comfortable in a victim role (heavy!). Knowing this I tell myself (and him) that this dynamic is not normal and I don't want to be around it.
I guess I am mainly venting, but I think I'm looking for validation to stay away from this crazy guy once and for all. Has anybody had this experience? Any advice? I really want the money, but not the crazy!



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I've had similar situations with regulars and boyfriends and it took a lot of therapy and "me-time" to break the patterns from my childhood. I admire anyone introspective enough to explore that about themselves, because I know first hand how difficult that can be.

), it throws my hustle off, and likely ruins my shot at other potential customers for the night. By maintaining a positive and upbeat attitude at work, I'm actually making more money in the long run, PLUS I am getting the "good" customers -- the ones who are attracted to my "genuine" hustle, smile and high energy, instead of the customers that are attracted by a girl they feel they may be able to take advantage of or "kick" when she's down.
What can I say, I'm a sensitive Cancer. 

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