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Thread: I might have to give up camming...

  1. #26
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    I have had to move like 6 times in 2 years due to this issue. Only, its normally them yelling and it showing up in as background noise on cam, which I CAN'T have. I would move asap. There's nothing you can do unless a.) you have at least 1-2k extra cash lying around to *try* and soundproof as much as possible (if you're on top of anyone's apt you're kind of screwed :-/) and b.) your landlord will allow you to tear the walls open and add in insulation which is also costly.



    Here's what I have learned during my 2 year disaster:

    - don't live in a guest house because you will never be able to get fast enough internet speeds
    - don't sign more than like a 3 month lease max, because 3 days after you move in, loud ass partying college kids might move in next door & party+scream all day and night
    - only live in a bottom story apartment because otherwise your neighbors will definitely hear you
    - your best bet is to rent a large room in a house with a bedroom that shares no walls with any other bedroom. the least # of roommates you have, the better. preferably just 1 so you can work around their 9-5 job most of the time

  2. #27
    Veteran Member annabellz's Avatar
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Somethings not right here. First you say neighbors meaning theres more then one person living next to you. Second you say when they complained you werent doing anything louder then a normal tone of voice.

    Sound goes both ways. If they can hear you- you should be able to hear them. Unless they just oddly sit in silence all the time, you should also be able to hear them.

    So either

    1- you were louder then you thought, you need to tone it down or soundproof because if they keep complaining you will get in trouble.

    2- you werent loud and the neighbors are nuts, you BF didnt exaggerate how they chewed him out. they have no right to complain and you shouldnt have to live in silence because they cant deal with normal noise levels. You should preemptively take action. Approach the landlord FIRST and tell them the new neighbors are complaining to you that you are being too noisy when youre not doing anything out of the ordinary. Tell the landlord youre not going to live in silence because the new neighbors cant deal with normal noise levels. Youve lived there for X amount of months previously with no noise complaints and nothings changed. Discuss with your BF how to handle it the next time the neighbors complain. A polite Im sorry you feel that way but we are not making any excess noise is all you need to say because youre not.

    If you cam in an average tone of voice and you do it during normal hours then if THEY dont like the noise then let THEM soundproof.

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  4. #28
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Quote Originally Posted by ukmissy View Post
    Call me anti Social , but if my neighbours started to complain about me carrying out my daily life , - ie talking at a reasonable tone , in my own home, I would tell them to go fuck themselves ...... Don't you all just wish you lived next to happy me
    Its easy to say that, but technically if they record you and send it to the landlord, you'll get in big trouble for disrupting their legal right to "quiet enjoyment" in their own apartment. Ifit continues, its grounds for a legal eviction. Sucks but its true.

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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Hmm...I thought I posted, but obviously not! LOL

    I would second the soundproofing, just for your own peace of mind.

    I would also go talk to them. I am always amazed by how many people leap to moving, legal positioning, complaints, etc before just attempting to have a conversation!! Not just on here - my friend is having an issue with noisy neighbors, and posted about it on FB asking for advice...EVERYONE started talking about complaints, calling the cops, breaking the lease, and not one person said "hey, have you gone and politely asked them to keep it down"?

    It may be intimidating, especially if they were really rude the other day, but you never know what was going on. You say they are new, and don't even have furniture yet? Also that this was the neighbors DAD, not the neighbor himself? Maybe they were having a really stressful move, tempers are frayed, Dad is complaining about them owing him money, furniture was meant to be delivered that can't be and now they have no where to sleep....really anything could have happened to make them overreact, and for all you know, they could be cowering in their apartment right now feeling AWFUL and thinking that they have screwed it up now and are going to have problems with you. Hell, they could have had the guys below or above them ACTUALLY yelling, and banged on the wrong door! (it happens, trust me)

    Just go, knock on the door, and have a calm, respectful conversation. Say that you are really confused as to what happened - that you were simply on skype with a friend, and having a conversation at a normal tone. Make it clear that you want to have a good relationship with all your neighbors, and that you don't want to get off on the wrong foot. Tempting as it is to say "that was unacceptable" bite your tongue in the name of harmonious living, and ask them if they can hear you and your bf talking? Say that you cannot hear them, so you can't figure out what the issue was! You can also say that if they can hear you, to come (nicely!) and let you know - then you will be able to work out what they can hear, and if soundproofing fixes it.

    Seriously - best case scenario, they apologize, you end up with a good relationship without any of this hassle.
    Worst case scenario, they are total pricks, yell at you, refuse to have a conversation at all. In that case, guess what? You just made yourself the victim, and strengthened any legal case or complaint you have. If you do go to the landlord then, you come across as the mature, responsible tenant - "hey mr landlord, the new guys cam and yelled at us, and we couldn't figure out why, we were only talking. I went to try and chat to them about it, and try to sort it out, and they yelled again and slammed the door. I don't know what to do, so I am coming to you now.". If you DON'T talk to them first, your landlord may tell you to do that anyway.

    I always say that an introduction and saying 'let me know if we are too loud" goes a LONG way to a better living situation. When I haven't done it, I have had complaints, stress, hassle....and every time I have done it, I have had ZERO problems. In fact, I have had friendlier neighbors, and happier landlords. And trust me, I am an incredibly anti-social person. I have no interest in becoming buddy-buddy with my landlord or neighbors. I do this so that I DON"T ever have to deal with them except in the normal, polite, "good morning" way.
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  7. #30
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    The mic of the cam picks up very soft voices. I didn't have an idea, but once I was working in the bedroom, behind closed doors and my BF burped in the kitchen, it was quite quitet but I still saw it in the encoder (it shows the audio) that it was picked up and my customers asked what was that. I was very suprised! I didn't have an idea that the mic picks up everything. In a show they can even hear how I finger myself. So you can be super quiet, they will still hear you.

    You can also try sound-proofing if you want, or typing, or other hours, you don't have to give it up just like that.

    You can move too, but I think as long as you aren't living in a house alone, they will hear you. Here walls aren't thin, and I usually only hear when neighbours are literally YELLING but at night, when everything is quiet it's so much easier to hear sounds from the neighbours. At night if I'm in bed reading, I can tell if they have friends around and talking, laughing, while daytime I only hear if they yell, and if I'm very bored sometimes I put my ear onto the floor and listen to them. Very interesting, I now know that the husband sends text messages to some "bitch"' and the kid is fed up with everything.... oh well, being a hermit you know....

    So I know they can hear me at night, but I don't care. Noone complained and I don't think anyone will. It's just too embarassing. In the begining I always told my BF what if they will complain and such, but he said, he doesn't give a shit. Well now me neither.

    But if you do, or you have to, you have so many things you can try before giving it up.

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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Quote Originally Posted by annabellz View Post
    Somethings not right here. First you say neighbors meaning theres more then one person living next to you. Second you say when they complained you werent doing anything louder then a normal tone of voice.

    Sound goes both ways. If they can hear you- you should be able to hear them. Unless they just oddly sit in silence all the time, you should also be able to hear them.

    So either

    1- you were louder then you thought, you need to tone it down or soundproof because if they keep complaining you will get in trouble.

    2- you werent loud and the neighbors are nuts, you BF didnt exaggerate how they chewed him out. they have no right to complain and you shouldnt have to live in silence because they cant deal with normal noise levels. You should preemptively take action. Approach the landlord FIRST and tell them the new neighbors are complaining to you that you are being too noisy when youre not doing anything out of the ordinary. Tell the landlord youre not going to live in silence because the new neighbors cant deal with normal noise levels. Youve lived there for X amount of months previously with no noise complaints and nothings changed. Discuss with your BF how to handle it the next time the neighbors complain. A polite Im sorry you feel that way but we are not making any excess noise is all you need to say because youre not.

    If you cam in an average tone of voice and you do it during normal hours then if THEY dont like the noise then let THEM soundproof.
    Well, from time to time I hear people talking on the phone over there if they're talking in the bedroom but I live in a complex that's highly military so this week is the first time in the last 6 months that anyone has been that apartment for more than a few hours at a time. I'm kind of wondering (since it was the girls father and he's older) if he had a hearing aid and had it adjusted a little high.

    EDIT: Also, our bedrooms are back to back. So, typically I don't hear talking because most people don't hang out in their bedrooms. The only time I'm in mine is if I'm camming (unless I'm sleeping) and I'm assuming it's the same for them. Except last night when they sat in the room with the light on till 3am.

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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    You have got to be kidding me. You're considering giving up camming, your work, your way to pay bills because the neighbors don't like the noise? How does that even make sense? If they don't like the noise, tell them to move into a fucking house, not an apartment. And if they hear you camming in a normal voice THEY WILL HEAR EVERYTHING ELSE THAT DOESN'T EVEN RELATE TO CAMMING! What next? You're gonna breathe too loud and you're going to give that up too? Babe I can't believe you're even posting this.

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  12. #33
    Veteran Member StephanieXS's Avatar
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    I guess being the bullied kid my whole life makes me automatically feel like I have to give in when someone gets mad at me for something. I'm trying to work on it, I've just had bad experiences every place I've ever lived that have made my life hell, my initial instinct was to react in away that would protect me from eviction or whatever else they'd try to threaten me with.

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  14. #34
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Quote Originally Posted by StephanieXS View Post
    I guess being the bullied kid my whole life makes me automatically feel like I have to give in when someone gets mad at me for something. I'm trying to work on it, I've just had bad experiences every place I've ever lived that have made my life hell, my initial instinct was to react in away that would protect me from eviction or whatever else they'd try to threaten me with.
    Threaten you? What makes your neighbors more special or powerful over you? They are tenants just like you are, no one gets evicted or whatever just because a tenant dislikes a neighbor. Did you ever consider that maybe it's not even about you? That they are just rude bitter people? In fact, most people who have problems with you it's not even personal. They are not the boss of you, no one is. Don't let anyone- even your boyfriend, not saying he is a bad guy, just sayin- dictate your life. You are first, always.

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  16. #35
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    about typing and no talking....I have a friend she only type and she is quite succesful. But she works in Israel.

    There's another option: get the volume of your cam higher, so you can almost whisper and everybody can hear it.

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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Quote Originally Posted by StephanieXS View Post
    I guess being the bullied kid my whole life makes me automatically feel like I have to give in when someone gets mad at me for something. I'm trying to work on it, I've just had bad experiences every place I've ever lived that have made my life hell, my initial instinct was to react in away that would protect me from eviction or whatever else they'd try to threaten me with.
    I can understand that - you have a highly developed flight response!! But the good news is - this is an awesome opportunity to prove to yourself that you are NOT that bullied kid anymore, and that you CAN do things differently! Once you've proven to yourself that you can deal with these guys from the position of an equal, of a strong, capable adult - well, then the next time something happens, you will KNOW that you can deal with it in a way that is new to you!

    And if you have dealt with issues before - at least you should know your rights and done research on your local tenancy laws, right? Whenever I have had issues with neighbors, landlords, etc - it gives me a chance to make sure that I know my rights, that I know the legal process, and that I can learn what to do in future to protect myself (thus far I have learned to: stand my ground on doing a PROPER walk through inspection, make SURE that I have every communication in writing, confirm in writing when my name is taken off a lease, make sure that a damage deposit is either paid out of my checkbook, or at least my half of it is, clarify if a "months notice" is 30 days or a calendar month, and the ins and outs of local noise bylaws. Fuck yeah informed renter!).

    So if you are trying to work on it - grab this opportunity by the BALLS and go work on it! Take a few deep breaths, write out and consider carefully what you want to say, and go talk to them. Or go talk to the landlord. And do it knowing that you are 100% within your rights to do so, and that you have a valid point to make.
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  19. #37
    Featured Member webcamcutie's Avatar
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Absolutely, I don't use sound due to too much background noise and to save from being embarassed, I just type and I do quite well its all in how you do it, I get some guys leave cause they HAVE to HAVE a mic but a lot will stay anyways.

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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    -----Well, from time to time I hear people talking on the phone over there if they're talking in the bedroom but I live in a complex that's highly military so this week is the first time in the last 6 months that anyone has been that apartment for more than a few hours at a time. I'm kind of wondering (since it was the girls father and he's older) if he had a hearing aid and had it adjusted a little high. ------

    So the girl lives alone or with her dad? If she lives alone and the dad came over to visit i would say maybe so if they live together then maybe he did have mic set too high on his hearing aid. I would say stop running scared stand your ground and if it happens again look into sound proofing. Start typing as a last restort. I know its been said numerous time all over the boards that guys prefere sound and i honestly think they do. But on monday my sound driver on my laptop crashed and the mic wouldnt pick up anymore so i had to type the rest of my shift because i didnt want to log off and re-install the sound drivers I still got paid shows. Just stand your ground and do ur thing act nothing happened and if it happens again start typing or talking quiter and invest in that eggs crate stuff to sound proff ur cam space. Webcam mics are very sensitive my cat sometimes meows very softy and i dont think the guys can hear it then i see "kitty" "pussy!" "i hear a happy pussy" and stuff like that.

    I cannot stress this enuf tho because i too have taken advantage of andbeen bullied for many years dont let ppl scare you control you manipulate you or anyting like that but im the opposite of u i devolped a over-sensitivity to fight back and not cowar down. Sometimes it does get me trouble but other times it shocks ppl that sweet lil ol mindi has some fire under her rainbow giggles and sunshine and it sets them in line and they never pull that shit with me again.
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  22. #39
    Veteran Member Melodie's Avatar
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Argh fuck them!
    Lol I hate neighbours!
    I used to get home from work at like 1130pm, and my downstairs neighbours would complain about me walking around late at night!

    Idiots lol. Like do I love hearing ppl walking around above ME at 9a, when I've only been asleep like 5 hrs? Well,no but its an apartment! If you don't want to hear ppl living their normal lives, get a house!
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlamourRouge View Post
    Its easy to say that, but technically if they record you and send it to the landlord, you'll get in big trouble for disrupting their legal right to "quiet enjoyment" in their own apartment. Ifit continues, its grounds for a legal eviction. Sucks but its true.

    I'm in the UK - And I would still tell them to go fuck themselves ... in a calm considerate tone, as not to upset any other neighbours At least here , sound is not a problem before 11pm , and after 11pm , talking in your own space definitely doesn't constitute problem ! Screaming the place down and Jiving to music through the night I could understand ... but talking, be it on the phone, to someone else in your space, to a room of cam customers at least in England would not get anyone evicted ! That's absolutely ridiclous. There is a difference between 'quiet enjoyment ' in ones apartment, and having to play dead seals!

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  26. #41
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    you can also buy sheets of R4 insulation - it is like a sheet of dry wall but it is a foam and available in a variety of thickness - you will probably only need a few for a bedroom and they should closely fit a standard ceiling height. maybe also try putting a little soft music pointed at the wall to muffle your voice - they need to accept that they live in an apartment and that is part of apartment life is hearing your neighbors

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  28. #42
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    If a guy cares more about your headset then he is broke and was not going to spend anyway, too damn anal & too much for your time and energy, or is a troll/hating girl....lol I think they will be more focused on your sexy a$$ than the headset even if they ask a question or few about it, it should not deter them. =)


    ...."BUT".... if that is a concern there is another way! *wink* For all girls having to be discrete or quiet about sound....Use a Bluetooth for your computer. The sound/audio is coming both ways from it and to it. So your speakers and mc is the Bluetooth which means no one will hear anything at all That rules out the neighbors and other people hearing you. Then you can whisper but still be loud and clear to the guys since the Bluetooth is in your ear by your mouth . Oh and it is discrete because it is small and in your ear so the custys can not really see it either. Win/Win situation HTH, BB's =)

    This may also help in the how to do it...
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  30. #43
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    ^I like the bluetooth idea!

    Re: soundproofing - you could just slap up some thick foam egg crate thingies or the insulation panels mentioned above onto your wall. It isn't expensive, and would only have to be done on the wall that adjoins your neighbor's apt.

    Another thing - if your bed is butted against the adjoining wall, and if that is where you cam from, that is making it easier for your noise to carry through to the neighbors. Never put your bed against the adjoining wall. Put it on a wall that is inside your place, or even cattycorner in the room. That will help diffuse some of the noise-carrying.
    ---- ----


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  32. #44
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    If you are going to use a headset make sure to turn the volume down a bit. I often talk too loud when what listen to in the headset is loud, which would make things worse.

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  34. #45
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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Don't give in! I have some very nosy neighbors and it still hasn't stop me from camming.
    Last edited by Marina Starr; 01-10-2013 at 12:06 PM.

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    Default Re: I might have to give up camming...

    Screw your neighbor. Tell him that you pay rent just like he does and you aren't YELLING, you are having ADULT RELATIONS with your boyfriend, if he doesn't like it, he can move.

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