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Thread: break up blues...

  1. #1
    Veteran Member jadey23's Avatar
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    Default break up blues...

    me and my guy have technically been broken up for a few months now, but we've been still sleeping together and basically dragging things out because of the chemistry and how well we get along. we finally ended things indefinitely over the phone; he just moved two hours away and it's just not going to work. he already has a fling in his new town and between working two jobs and going to school i have absolutely no time/energy to maintain what we have. i'm a mess, i'm in class right now not paying attention @ all. i know with time the sadness will subside but i'm afraid how this is going to affect me @ work -- if i've had a bad day or feel totally burned out touching customers it's always been so comforting to know that i have a man out there that i actually care for and have meaningful sex with. now that that's gone, i'm not sure how it's going to show in my hustle/cause me to burst into tears once i'm driving home from work. i fucking miss him and i'm pretty much dreading the club. tell me it gets better and i won't go broke!!!!
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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: break up blues...

    i can probably tell you that itll get better and you'll move on, but i can't tell you that you won't go broke in the meantime if you can't keep a good attitude at work sorry this happened, and it is hard. but you need to take your mind to a different place at work, and really concentrate on the money and put this out of your mind. you can promise yourself that you will think/cry/obsess over it later, but don't do it in the club.

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  4. #3
    Veteran Member jadey23's Avatar
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    Default Re: break up blues...

    You are right :/ im gonna try and put my best game face on... breaking up sucks!!! Thanks simone.
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    Default Re: break up blues...

    I'm going through something similar atm. It's hard because you still have feelings for and are attracted to the person, but you know that it's not going to work out in the long run. If you can't focus at work, then don't push through it, take some time off work (if you can) to focus on your studies and yourself-you deserve that. Or just work a little less, so that you don't burn out. We are all "actresses" inside the club, so no one will see what's happening in your personal life in your hustle if you don't want them to! Try to be positive-maybe go for coffee with friends before work, or go to the gym, or buy yourself a new, cute outfit (or do something you enjoy) so that you are feeling good before you start-then conduct business as usual and make some $ .

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  7. #5
    Featured Member Odette's Avatar
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    Default Re: break up blues...

    I dunno...I hope you have some savings because dancing relies so much on you going into work in at least a decent state of mind. Which can escape you most days going through a tough breakup. The last break up I went through I had no desire to work and I had also let myself gain a bunch of weight towards the end I was so miserable, so working wasn't that much of an option at that time anyways. I used the first few months after the breakup to heal and focus on school and get back into shape but I'm reeeeeaaaallly happy I didn't have to work because I'm pretty sure I would have either sucked at it or ended up hating dancing and quit. That said, dancing was a great thing to have to help with moving on, after I'd processed everything and was feeling more mentally healthy. Also I think it could a good outlet for any anger a breakup may bring...I was pretty fucking pissed the night me and my ex broke it off...went to work used the line "I just broke up with my bf and I'm feeling naughty" or some variation and almost cracked 1k in a dinky dive bar. It's still my highest earning night to date. So there is a silver lining...possibly. I think how you will handle dancing depends on your personality but the most important thing is to make sure at least your next few shifts are if not pleasant at least not terrible. Maybe it's time to call in some regs for some visits? This should both boost your mood and confidence and I have found regulars make you feel great after a breakup, they're always full of compliments and positive things to say about you
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    Veteran Member jadey23's Avatar
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    Default Re: break up blues...

    @olive yeah I think im gonna try and take some days off.. I cant even pretend when im distraught . Looks like ill just have to take a hit on my savings for a bit :/

    @odette uff I wish I had regs but I havent really learned to cultivate them yet.. I think im just gonna take some time out and only go in on days where im feeling super ready..

    Thanks for the reply ladies
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    Veteran Member jadey23's Avatar
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    Default Re: break up blues...

    @olive yeah I think im gonna try and take some days off.. I cant even pretend when im distraught . Looks like ill just have to take a hit on my savings for a bit :/

    @odette uff I wish I had regs but I havent really learned to cultivate them yet.. I think im just gonna take some time out and only go in on days where im feeling super ready..

    Thanks for the reply ladies
    Unsophisticated in the finest sense of the word.

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