Oh man, I could write a book on this. Back in the early 2000's when I was a teenager and dancing, I was lured into porn when new dancing laws (no touching and 6 ft rule) went into affect in my big city. It was a ghost town for a few months. I needed cash quick, and went to FL for a week to make my monthly income. Little did I know they placed me on the most popular reality porn sites in existence, 5 of them. I was so clueless. As my "manager" drove me to the set, she received a phone call from a crying Mom from a past performer begging her to get the porn sites to take down her daughter's sites. Not gonna happen. I'm not sure why I was so numb. My mentality was that no one would find out, and if they did, **** them.
Needless to say, EVERYONE found out. A scorned ex boyfriend saw it, and messaged the link to every single friend on my social networking sites, including family. But even besides that, if someone finds out you are on an adult website, they can tell EVERYONE they know, or maybe they won't because then they will prove they were on an adult site. I essentially became famous in a small town, LOL.
Now that I am a Mom, married, and going back to school, I still can't go to Wal-Mart without someone looking at me and whispering. And this was many years ago. I often pondered moving to another state far away and starting over. Lucky for me, my HOT hubby loves me for me, and actually loved the fact of what I did. We have decided to cam together while we are both in grad school, which lets us both be home with our toddler which I never thought I would do. And it's amazing. I figure, what the heck? What's done is done, and I think this industry is powerful for women. I find that more women than men who "found out" about me actually thought it was very cool and were intrigued. Of course you get the crazy, conservative ones who want to burn you at the stake. In the back of your mind, you always wonder who knows what everytime you see someone. I face a harsh reality, but I embrace the industry, and I am happier than I have ever been in my life.



Reply With Quote

Bookmarks