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Thread: How to Domme

  1. #1
    Veteran Member beauvoir's Avatar
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    Default How to Domme

    I get guys sometimes asking me to control them, tell them when to cum and what to do and my mind always goes blank and I tell them I'm more sub than dom (true!). What ideas or advice can you guys give me so I don't keep losing custom?

    xx

  2. #2
    Featured Member maryjaynexo's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    In short, you really need to scour the web and do a lot of research. If you know your fetishes and subsets of BDSM, your mind won't go blank. If you're more of a sub person, you might not be suited to it. Read up on BDSM, female domination, femdom relationships, and all the various fetishes that go with it: bondage, masochism, sadism, humiliation, cbt, sph, findomme, etc etc etc. I could go on for half a page, lol

    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...Domming-on-Cam
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...ing-Dominatrix
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...hip-Books-Pack
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...inancial-Domme
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...-advice-needed
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...-INFO-PLEASSSE!!!
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...s-a-Dominatrix
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...tress-training
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...x-Does-it-Work
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...e-a-dominatrix
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...Online-amp-IRL
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sho...e-a-dominatrix





  3. #3
    God/dess CourtneyRaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Quote Originally Posted by maryjaynexo View Post
    If you're more of a sub person, you might not be suited to it.
    Absolutely 100% true. As a sub, my mind just cannot comprehend dominating a person. I can read about it and understand it but I don't "get" it. I think some people who are open to it can learn and become great Dommes, but then there are people like me who just... can't. And that's okay. Don't worry about losing customs, there are so many other fetishes you can cater to that don't require an in depth understanding of controlling men.

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  5. #4
    Senior Member DarlaSummers's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    See, I can be a Dom in real life, but when it comes to doing it over camming, I have a difficult time. No idea why, I think it might be the way my "style" is of Domination, where it doesn't translate well online. Definitely agree with having to do a lot of research and at the end of the day, it still just might not be for you.


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    Veteran Member VoluptiousBriadda's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Quote Originally Posted by DarlaSummers View Post
    See, I can be a Dom in real life, but when it comes to doing it over camming, I have a difficult time. No idea why, I think it might be the way my "style" is of Domination, where it doesn't translate well online. Definitely agree with having to do a lot of research and at the end of the day, it still just might not be for you.
    Holy hell,I finally found someone like me! It is soooo incredibly frustrating to have a controlling,dominant personality IRL,but not be able to convey that well on cam... Ive been controlling/dominating my husband unintentionally for almost 13 yrs now,since our early teens.We arent and havent been in any sort of mistress/sub lifestyle,its just NATURALLY the way we are.He loves to let me decide EVERYTHING so that he doesnt have to and I feel like i MUST decide everything and be in control all the time (besides the fact that Im generally a mega bitch,although the older I get,the less cunty I get lol) I could list hundreds of other examples but you get the point. But when it comes to cam,i just massively struggle to convey my dominant personality - its hands down the most frustrating part of camming for me!

    HOWWW can I be so naturally dominant IRL but NOT be able to properly exude that once I hit "start my show"???? Im hoping its bc Im still relatively new and that Ill eventually crack this giant mystery,I KNOW I have the potential to be an epic dominatrix so until then,call me Sherlock Holmes bishes,Im determined to get to the fuckin bottom of this!!!!

    whoooops,did i just majorly threadjack? Sorry OP!
    Quote Originally Posted by BlasianBytch View Post

    If you are ashamed of your body don't expect someone to pay to see it. If you can't act like your body is a treasure how DARE you charge people to see it.

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  9. #6
    Veteran Member beauvoir's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    I think you girls are right. The extra income and clientèle would be nice, but it's just not me and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it. Plus if I'm not enjoying camming, then I don't want to to do it!

    x

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  11. #7
    God/dess CourtneyRaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Quote Originally Posted by beauvoir View Post
    I think you girls are right. The extra income and clientèle would be nice, but it's just not me and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it. Plus if I'm not enjoying camming, then I don't want to to do it!

    x
    Exactly the conclusion I've come to, and I'm quite happy. Most of my income comes from repeat business so by only offering things I enjoy and am genuinely good at it keeps guys coming back for more. Plus I think guys take you more seriously when they see that you're honest about your talents and you're okay with referring subs to a model who might be better suited to give them the show they want. For all the other guys in your free chat who see you being upfront about it I actually think it makes them more confident to do a show with you because, they know you're sincere when you tell them you can give them an experience that will satisfy them.

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    Featured Member MissSassyPickles's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    I would like to add that if you want to try being a domme on cam, don't be afraid to say that you are new and want to learn, as well as ask your customers what they like.

    It's better to be honest then pretend that you're super experienced when you're not, as it will make customers feel like they've been cheated.

    For instance, there are a million and one girls claiming to be financial dommes and have absolutely no idea what they're talking about! Being genuine will get you a long way.
    Quote Originally Posted by qurl View Post
    You are sassy AND smart Miss Pickles.

    "Well behaved women seldom make history." - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

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  15. #9
    Veteran Member VoluptiousBriadda's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Quote Originally Posted by beauvoir View Post
    I think you girls are right. The extra income and clientèle would be nice, but it's just not me and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it. Plus if I'm not enjoying camming, then I don't want to to do it!

    x
    Since youre more of a sub,do you advertise that or sub in privates? Yea femdomme may be popular but dont forget that there are many men out there looking for female subs,so you may be able to make up what you would lose in domme privates by catering to that type of clientele instead! There are soo many ladies that offer domination,Ive found female subs to be much more few and far between,which actually would be a huge advantage for you! And if you arent comfortable with doing some sub stuff,then simply state your boundaries on your profile or tell them when they show interest in taking you exclusive.
    Quote Originally Posted by BlasianBytch View Post

    If you are ashamed of your body don't expect someone to pay to see it. If you can't act like your body is a treasure how DARE you charge people to see it.

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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Quote Originally Posted by MissSassyPickles View Post
    I would like to add that if you want to try being a domme on cam, don't be afraid to say that you are new and want to learn, as well as ask your customers what they like.

    It's better to be honest then pretend that you're super experienced when you're not, as it will make customers feel like they've been cheated.

    For instance, there are a million and one girls claiming to be financial dommes and have absolutely no idea what they're talking about! Being genuine will get you a long way.
    I could not agree with this more. When someone asks me if I do _____ I tell them I am trying to learn more but I am not so great at it, can you help me. THEY LOVE IT

    I have gotten so far with this. I am not versed well in SPH and I told this one that.... I told him I would try, he tipped me $40 in free chat just for telling him that.
    Another guy wanted me to FinDom him and I told him I had not done it before, before you know it he is mentoring me.


    They honestly like teaching you in my experience.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marina Starr View Post
    "....because all that hotness should be shared and not go to waste".

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    Veteran Member BlondebombGA's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Why not try this spin. I used to consider myself pure sub, but since camming and phone work I have discovered I am quite a natural Domme, and it totally turns me on. So consider me a switch. I tried to think about what turns me on as a sub. What words, fantasies, and situations really hit that trigger for me that made my spine tingle. Turn that around and think about it from their perspective.

    It certainly isn't that simple, and yes you need to do a TON of research, especially if you have never explored the world of BDSM in real life (reading '50 shades of grey' does not count for f*ck sake. That book, which I have never read nor will ever read, irritates the sh*t out of me for some reason. Can you tell? lol).


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    Senior Member PeachyPie's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    I want to bump this post, and also I totally relate to the other ladies on here who can domme irl and not online. I'm am SUCH a sub in real life, and what really turns me on irl is a dominant person, but with the right kind of sub I can totally turn on the bitch switch > but online I find it SUPER HARD to flip that switch! I think it's just because I can't really interact with the person on the other side of the computer screen. I manage ok, especially with certain fetishes (I fucking love SDH dudes!). but it can be difficult. Plus I find that a lot of "subs" try to dick me around, like "ohhhh Mistress I want you to humiliate me sooo much!!" but they don't want to PAY.

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  23. #13
    Featured Member kittykrane's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    Same here. It doesn't translate all that well on cam. Ive also found that most of the guys who want to be dominated aren't always true subs. They just want to try it a few times, but then halfway through the show, they want to take charge or just leave.


    "If you don't stand for anything, you'll fall for everything"

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  25. #14
    Senior Member ThatBitch's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    There is ALSO a market for sub girls, so if you're sub, why not try catering to that?? You can market yourself for that and get the guys who want that instead of the idiots trying to make any girl they think is hot be a "domme". I think you're always going to make the best money by using your true nature and really pushing that because you can project that best, which translates to better sales and more repeat business.
    ---- ----


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  27. #15
    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    I am a Domme IRL and professionally but on cam, I just cant seem to do it, so Ive focused my cam on fetish only. When they say, "I want to be dominated", I go blank and tell them I cant help them.
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

  28. #16
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    Default Re: How to Domme

    I don't cam but I'm curious about how you can pull off sub shows. I dance and I never tell customers I'm submissive anymore because in addition to the physical safety risks, they try to assume the power in the interaction, and that almost always means less money. Does this dynamic tend to happen as much in submissive cam shows? Any tips on how to maintain control of the monetary exchange while giving the impression of subservience?

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