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Thread: Help with a regular

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    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Help with a regular

    I have this regular who constantly pushes for OTC meetups. I make excuses, text him when I go into work, and he almost always comes in when I text him.

    He doesn't buy dances, nor does he buy VIP time/champagne rooms. He likes to sit at the bar, buy me a cocktail and stays for an hour or 2. He gives me $100-$200 upfront when he gets there, and tips me $20 every time I go on stage.

    He prefers to come in late afternoon/early evening, so usually the club is dead enough to where I don't mind spending that full time with him for that amount of money.

    Thing is, I know he is wealthy, and always brings more money than he ends up spending on me. Without selling lapdances (he ALWAYS refuses, I've never given him one before) or VIP time (he doesn't like that some money goes to the club), how would you go about getting the rest of that stack in his wallet while still tactfully avoiding the lunch date he constantly presses for?
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

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    Senior Member nikk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    You could tell him you need money to pay your house fee and fines, make up a reason you were fined

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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    Sounds like a customer I had. If he consistently spends the same amount of money on you he might have a set budget for ITC interactions. I hate to say it but rich guys don't stay rich if they can easily be parted with their money. You could try getting him drunk, but if he spends a fair amount on you and sees you when you text him then just hang on to him! You could try straight out asking for more, but if he won't budge he probably has a limit.

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    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    He constantly alludes to buying me things (paying my rent, replacing my stolen phone, etc.) but won't follow through unless I agree to meet for lunch. I was going to go to lunch with him a while back but rethought the situation and ended up canceling, because I really only want to work ITC. Plus, I wouldn't want to get breeched if anyone found out b/c I don't like any other clubs in my area. He was a regular long before I worked there, is close with the bartenders and other regulars, and my club can be super gossipy.

    I told him I got a traffic violation once and he offered to pay it, so I told him it was $240 and instead of giving me the cash he said "let's meet for lunch tomorrow and I'll take care of it."

    I thought of taking naughty pics on my phone and sending them via text for $50-$100/photo. Just lingerie, maybe a topless one... My club is a pasties club so I feel like he would pay a lot ($300+) for a topless photo. Other than that I'm out of ideas!
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    First of all, you're spoiling him by spending 1-2 hours for only $1-200, even when it's slow. Of course he's not going to get a dance or go to VIP when he's getting such a bargain for your company!

    Second, I think he's full of shit re: buying you things/giving you lots of money for OTC, and I think he's nearing the end of his shelf life as an ITC regular. There's a handful of customers that become "regulars" like this - they don't really use the club for its intended purpose (ie. ITC entertainment) but rather to just seek girls out for OTC. He'll drop a bit of cash for a while, purposefully coming in when it's slow to get more bang for his buck and get to know you better, and keep pushing for OTC over and over with the "promise" of actual spending.

    Seeing a stripper OTC is literally all he wants. I mean, if you're comfortable with it, you could give it a shot and see if he'll put his money where it mouth is, but I doubt you will be able to command a significant amount of $$$ for lunch, let alone $300 for a topless photo. Honestly, I don't get why you think he would be willing to pay that much for the photo when he hasn't proven to be a big spender at all.

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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    What Shanna Dior said times 13,984,534,565. Exactly!! Bre, I am surprised that you didn't see right through his bullshit. It's an obvious and common game guys play with girls in the industry. Get as much as they can for a low price- because let's be real, as a clean dancer you would be giving him the exact same treatment you are giving him now but topless in VIP for $400 an hour. But no, he gives you $100. Guys like him pretend they are too good for dances and VIP or have some "legit" excuse why they don't do stuff like that, then pretend that they are capable of taking care of you- paying your bills and etc....(cuz every sex worker needs a Capt Save A Hoe, right?! *rolls eyes*) to get you outside the club.

    DO NOT consider sending him naughty pics when this guy is obviously playing games with you. "I'll pay for this n that...only if you have lunch with me." That's fucking bullshit. A real man would just pay the shit! How pathetic can one be to give a girl empty promises just so she can go out with him? He is taking advantage of you by making all of these empty promises so he can get attention from you and you're giving him way too much attention for little money. He is taking advantage of you. A real follow through man would give you more than $100 and a drink, pay your fines, pay your bills, or whatever else you need to prove to YOU that he is worthy of having lunch with.

    Topless or not, time is money. Your time is valuable. If it is slow, go to the locker room and read a book or something instead of having a free conversation. People come to the club to talk to half naked women and they have to pay for that shit. It's not fair that a guy gets to sit and talk with your pretty ass half naked for free. Just because he is not buying dances doesn't mean he shouldn't respect your time with money.
    Last edited by JoJoX; 03-12-2013 at 03:08 PM.

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  11. #7
    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    Quote Originally Posted by shanna dior View Post
    First of all, you're spoiling him by spending 1-2 hours for only $1-200, even when it's slow. Of course he's not going to get a dance or go to VIP when he's getting such a bargain for your company!

    Second, I think he's full of shit re: buying you things/giving you lots of money for OTC, and I think he's nearing the end of his shelf life as an ITC regular. There's a handful of customers that become "regulars" like this - they don't really use the club for its intended purpose (ie. ITC entertainment) but rather to just seek girls out for OTC. He'll drop a bit of cash for a while, purposefully coming in when it's slow to get more bang for his buck and get to know you better, and keep pushing for OTC over and over with the "promise" of actual spending.

    Seeing a stripper OTC is literally all he wants. I mean, if you're comfortable with it, you could give it a shot and see if he'll put his money where it mouth is, but I doubt you will be able to command a significant amount of $$$ for lunch, let alone $300 for a topless photo. Honestly, I don't get why you think he would be willing to pay that much for the photo when he hasn't proven to be a big spender at all.
    Sorry if I wasn't clear on the total amount. $100-$200 plus $20 every time I go on stage (with about 4-5 girls working slow day shift) = $180-$300 total, depending on the upfront payment, which I will hand it to him, is higher when he spends more time with me.

    My clubs DAY shift VIP cut for the girl is only $90 half hour, $180 full hour. :/ I definitely make more off of him sitting with him at the bar than I would in VIP, or at the very least the same amount. If I wanted to sell VIP (I've tried), it's contingent that it's ONTOP of what he already pays me upfront. While I appreciate the feedback, I wasn't asking for you to pass judgement on the amount of time I spend with a customer and for what amount of money. I think I know how my club's pay out works, thanks.

    As for the photos, he's paid me $100 for one lingerie photo already. Which is why I think he would pay more for topless.

    I usually like the feedback that you give, Shanna, and we seem to agree on a lot of things, but this time you've come off as a little aggressive and I don't appreciate it.

    I know he's trying to milk me for OTC and will eventually expire. That's ALL regulars! (Or most, at least) I feel it's worth it to have a good day shift customer, when I prefer to work 2 doubles (8-12 hour shifts) a week rather than work 3-4 nights a week, because my commute is so long and I have pretty high stripper stamina, lol.

    I wasn't asking for someone to tell me he wasn't worth my time. I make that call, and I think he's fully worth it. He's been coming there for YEARS, long before I started working there, and will still come in whether I accept our transaction or not. So he's either paying me, or sitting there at the bar watching stages for free while I wait in the corner for the magical day shift customer that will be more "worth my time" than a man who already pays par or above my club's day VIP prices. (My club's day shift is VERY slow, if you don't have regulars, you don't make money.)
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

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    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    Quote Originally Posted by JoJoX View Post
    What Shanna Dior said times 13,984,534,565. Exactly!! Bre, I am surprised that you didn't see right through his bullshit. It's an obvious and common game guys play with girls in the industry. Get as much as they can for a low price- because let's be real, as a clean dancer you would be giving him the exact same treatment you are giving him now but topless in VIP for $400 an hour. But no, he gives you $100. Guys like him pretend they are too good for dances and VIP or have some "legit" excuse why they don't do stuff like that, then pretend that they are capable of taking care of you- paying your bills and etc....(cuz every sex worker needs a Capt Save A Hoe, right?! *rolls eyes*) to get you outside the club.

    DO NOT consider sending him naughty pics when this guy is obviously playing games with you. "I'll pay for this n that...only if you have lunch with me." That's fucking bullshit. A real man would just pay the shit! How pathetic can one be to give a girl empty promises just so she can go out with him? He is taking advantage of you by making all of these empty promises so he can get attention from you and you're giving him way too much attention for little money. He is taking advantage of you. A real follow through man would give you more than $100 and a drink, pay your fines, pay your bills, or whatever else you need to prove to YOU that he is worthy of having lunch with.

    Topless or not, time is money. Your time is valuable. If it is slow, go to the locker room and read a book or something instead of having a free conversation. People come to the club to talk to half naked women and they have to pay for that shit. It's not fair that a guy gets to sit and talk with your pretty ass half naked for free. Just because he is not buying dances doesn't mean he shouldn't respect your time with money.
    I'm not being swindled by his empty promises, I thought I mentioned I wasn't going to go to lunch with him.

    *sigh*

    *deep breath*

    My point was that he brings in about $400-$600 every time he comes in. I can see by the amount he has in his wallet when he takes it out to pay me.

    Yes he's obviously lording it over me. NO he's not a real man! No, I would never DATE someone like him or try to turn him into an SD. No, he's not the kind of whale big spender that warrants more of my attention. But is he a good customer? I'm sorry, but for day shift, at my club, YES. He's a good customer.

    But he could be a BETTER one. I was asking if anyone had any tricks for regulars like this, other than abandoning him and giving me all of that "my time is valuable" crap. Free conversation?! Dude's paying me my club's VIP prices to sit at the bar and talk to him, and the bartender and the other dancers! Who in their right *stripper* mind would go in the dressing room and read a BOOK rather than talk to a customer for money?! LOL!



    Ironically I just got this via text today...

    Last edited by summerbre; 03-12-2013 at 04:27 PM.
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    Quote Originally Posted by summerbre View Post
    I usually like the feedback that you give, Shanna, and we seem to agree on a lot of things, but this time you've come off as a little aggressive and I don't appreciate it.
    I wasn't trying to come off as aggressive, so apologies for that. I obviously don't know how your club payout works or how often you go on stage, so it just seemed like he was getting a sweet deal while you weren't - especially since the amount of stage tips basically doubles what you get from him, but you didn't mention just how significant that is. It just read as if you were sitting for 1-2 hours for sometimes as little as $100, being hassled to go OTC with promises of spending cash that had yet to materialize, and yet somehow thinking he might spend $300 for a topless photo. I mean, we can only give you advice based on the information you offer, you know?

    Basically, all you can really do is keep making excuses for not going OTC. Since he's actually paid for a photo in the past, it's definitely worth bringing up that option. Again, I didn't know he had paid for one before, and given how you described his spending, he just didn't seem like he'd bite. How did you come to that arrangement before?

    As for getting the rest of that stack in his wallet - does he spend it on other girls? Drinks? Does he leave with it? I'm not sure how to combat it if he spends it on other girls since some customers come in wanting variety, and it's not like you can offer a lesbian show right out on the floor. If it's drinks though, maybe you could try and get tipped for doing shots together? Some sort of drinking game?

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    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    Quote Originally Posted by shanna dior View Post
    I wasn't trying to come off as aggressive, so apologies for that. I obviously don't know how your club payout works or how often you go on stage, so it just seemed like he was getting a sweet deal while you weren't - especially since the amount of stage tips basically doubles what you get from him, but you didn't mention just how significant that is. It just read as if you were sitting for 1-2 hours for sometimes as little as $100, being hassled to go OTC with promises of spending cash that had yet to materialize, and yet somehow thinking he might spend $300 for a topless photo. I mean, we can only give you advice based on the information you offer, you know?

    Basically, all you can really do is keep making excuses for not going OTC. Since he's actually paid for a photo in the past, it's definitely worth bringing up that option. Again, I didn't know he had paid for one before, and given how you described his spending, he just didn't seem like he'd bite. How did you come to that arrangement before?

    As for getting the rest of that stack in his wallet - does he spend it on other girls? Drinks? Does he leave with it? I'm not sure how to combat it if he spends it on other girls since some customers come in wanting variety, and it's not like you can offer a lesbian show right out on the floor. If it's drinks though, maybe you could try and get tipped for doing shots together? Some sort of drinking game?
    It's alright, I understand I totally wasn't clear on the math or my club's day prices.

    The rest of it he usually leaves with. I've seen him tip the bartender anywhere from $20-$100 (same girl) so he's definitely inconsistent. I've never seen him hand money to another dancer, even on stages. Two sweet dayshift girls who've known him from years ago warned me not to sit with him, because they didn't realize he was paying me. When I mentioned he was, they were both very surprised.

    When we did the photo thing before, he had asked for it and I said he'd have to pay, he asked how much, and I said $100. I texted the photo on good faith, and he gave me the extra hundred next time I saw him (that day was the most I made off of him, which was around $300). That was also how he got my phone number (charged him $100).

    The only reason I hadn't sent him more is because my smartphone was stolen while I was out of town and I literally JUST replaced it (although my contract wasn't eligible for an upgrade yet, ugh), so the photos were no longer an option when I originally made this thread looking for ideas.

    The drinking game is a good idea, thank you. He's more of a "mental" guy if that makes sense (evidenced by the fact that he wants to talk for an hour rather than get dances), so maybe a trivia/memory game of some sort would work, too. I think if I challenged him to something like that then he'd pay... play... pay.
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with a regular

    Too bad the photos aren't an option! Although, I suppose you could take webcam shots and send them via email?

    Re: memory/trivial games, all I can think of is Scrabble and crosswords, but I can't really think of how you could monetize them. I feel like http://cardsagainsthumanity.com (a risqué version of Apples to Apples) could be interesting as well... He could tip you every time you win? It's meant to be a game for a group, but I think it could be adapted to just the two of you as well. Man, I really blanking on games that don't require props!

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