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Thread: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

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    Default Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    Negatively or positively?

    If so, how?

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It's brought out sides of me that I keep surprised always trying to be a good girl; now I'll ask for anything I want. Will turn down money & that's empowering

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    Stripping has definitely had more positive effects on my life than negative ones. For example, I had Body dysmorphic disorder through out my teens (unnecessarily so ). Dancing helped me over come this and it's also taught me to accept and appreciate my body (being women we all have our insecurities and of course I still have some, but not to an excessive degree anymore).

    It's made me a lot less naïve about men. Or rather it's "exposed them" to me/opened my eyes. I don't view this as being negative, I'm no "man hater". I think we've all seen the worst of both genders working in this field. I feel like I just understand them better (we do have more of an insight, not simply sexually either, by just interacting with them in a personal setting) than I otherwise would have and ironically I guess I am a bit more tolerant with them or more forgiving of them, in general, because of it.
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    it has made me SOO much more comfortable with my body. for the first time in my life i feel beautiful! as a teen i was akward, my father was a bit abusive and always called me ugly, my first boyfriend at 19 knocked me up and after being in that abusive relationship which turned me into a shell of a human being i thought i was dog-shit and put up with men treating me like crap for years because i believed i was grotesque and unworthy.. now not only do i KNOW im sexy and beautiful as hell, i've learned to wield my feminine powers like never before its a relief and my one regret is that i didn't do this earlier!
    i have a shit ton of confidence and I'm enjoying life for the fist time. i have plenty of money and im saving, planning for the future, and supporting my son myself. it feels amazing not to have to be stressed and crying all the time because i am so worried about money and not seeing my son because im working so much! i work 3 days a week, have plenty of money to raise my kid and spoil both of us a bit, and pay the bills, and spend the rest of the 4 days with him.
    like olive said, because of this job i've gotten a good look into the male psyche, and i've gotten a lot smarter about choosing a mate. overall its' been nothing but positive! some of it at first was daunting, and sometimes i put too much pressure on myself, but im working to overcome this and i have NO complaints about my job.

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    This job has affected me n both negative and positive ways..

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    wow thats amazing to hear simone! glad everything has worked out so well for you(:

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It has made me way more confident and made me understand humans more.
    xoxo

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It made me realize some of the assumptions I had about men were almost spot on. My eyes are definitely opened more though, and even though I got to see the real dark side that some of them are capable of- I don't paint all of them with the same brush. I did not turn into a man hater like some of my coworkers.

    I do like my body better than I would have had I not been a stripper. I don't think I will LOVE it the way that I should until I quit though, I see too many augmented bodies around to not compare myself to them. I know that is a personal issue that I must get over. When I remove myself from the clubs and this industry I can put it out of my mind that I don't measure up! LOL I go back and forth on getting surgery on myself. I'm hoping I can get the look I want through exercise.

    I don't like going out with men or people I don't consider close friends without getting paid for it. That's definitely a negative! LOL My friends say I need to accept more invites to be taken out, but when I get them I turn them down because I feel like if I'm not making money, I could be in bed relaxing.
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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    I'm definitely vainer and more health conscious since I started dancing. I find myself becoming more "insular" as the years go by. I almost never associate with "outsiders" because I feel that they just don't understand the business. I sometimes find myself becoming a bit elitist as well.

    I'm definitely more money hungry and materialistic. I'm more assertive, arrogant, cynical, and confident.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    On the negative side it has made me a bit jaded and the money of it has made me slightly materialistic, I must admit.

    On the positive side it has made me more assertive, motivated, confident, successful, and has helped with my social anxiety a great deal.

    All in all, it has changed me for the better and I have no regrets about it.
    "Rather have my feet hurting than my pockets."

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    Positive: I can read people like an open book. 75% of the time I know within a minute of talking to a customer if he's gonna buy or not. This translates easily into everyday life because now I can tell how a person is feeling just by looking at them. Being around so many people, being lied to, being led on about money, watching the guilty micro expressions men make when they talk about their wives, etc. I pick up on everything. My social intelligence has heightened tremendously. I'm less gullible, more confident, more assertive, more precise when asking for what I want. I learn new things everyday. I can think on my feet. I'm more resilient emotionally.

    Negative: I find myself compulsively lying, not just at work. I'm too good at lying. I hate lying to my friends and family.I temporarily lost my ambition for the future and am now working on getting myself back on track. I'm materialistic. I spend too much money. I'm shallow. I talk behind people's back wayyyy more than I ever did before I started dancing. I'm spoiled and entitled sometimes. I'm lazy and can't stick to a schedule to save my life. I act like a spoiled child when managers reprimand me. I don't respect my bosses. I don't respect a lot of the customers. I don't respect the club or any of the property in it. I used to hate being impolite and would RARELY insult a person to their face and I catch myself calling customers assholes and it doesn't make me feel very good. I equate money with happiness. I'm selfish. I don't trust anyone. I'm scared to get married because of all the husbands I meet who ask if they can fuck me. I can't make friends because I don't want people to know I dance. I've distanced myself from my family because I'm afraid of them finding out. I started dancing at 19 and every dancer and customer would comment on how innocent I looked. They don't anymore. I have to constantly remind myself that this job is just a stepping stone to my education and career and it'll all be over soon and deep down I am really a good person because sometimes I feel like a horrible twisted corrupted version of the girl I used to be.

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    Stripping changed me for the worse-gave me a drinking problem and I probably never would've tried cocaine if it weren't for stripping. Made me too obsessed with my looks too and less trusting of men in general. But it is good to hear about how it's changed people for the better.






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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It has made me more cynical and judgmental of the male species. Also it has dug deeper holes into my anxiety issues.

    To be honest, without this site I would of been eaten alive. The empowerment and wisdom I have gotten from this forum has made everything worthwhile, despite the drawbacks of actually being on the job, I feel like I have come out a better person because of you ladies.

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It has made me more cynical and judgmental of the male species. Also it has dug deeper holes into my anxiety issues.

    To be honest, without this site I would of been eaten alive. The empowerment and wisdom I have gotten from this forum has made everything worthwhile, despite the drawbacks of actually being on the job, I feel like I have come out a better person because of you ladies.

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    I think because we're such a stigmatized group, we have a tendency to exaggerate the positives and minimize the negatives. We want to give palatable answers to this question.

    Someone once said "This job takes something away from everyone: you won't know what it is until it's gone." That seems to be pretty accurate. It gives and it takes. The wider your eyes going in, the better you'll understand how the job is affecting you...but that doesn't mean you'll be able to stop it from affecting you.

    Negatives and positives for me as well. I have no regrets, but I also find myself wanting to protect my past self from a number of things (not so much specific events - just from the gradual distillation of certain effects).

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It's made me more impatient with vanilla jobs, especially serving and retail. I never had the patience for the managers in those places who 9/10 times don't have a clue what they're doing, but it was always the "best option" (because it was accepted by society... broke college kid has to waitress, yada yada) until I said fuck it and went back to dancing. Now if I don't like managers or a customer is a dick, I can say "fuck you" and walk away and not feel trapped and like some manager has me under their thumb.

    I put myself first a lot more now. My exes would be either pissed off and possessive or upset and disappointed with me dancing, and I didn't do it for a couple years because of them... I didn't do a lot of things because they wouldn't have liked them. My current boyfriend, I told up front various conditions of what dating me entails (everything from being a stripper to my destructive dog moving into his house to my temper), and that if he couldn't deal with it, I wasn't dating him. Happily, he accepted everything (he just spends a good chunk of time keeping his mouth shut =P ) But I know now I'd be unhappy if I changed or gave up something for someone again.

    It's also made me take a good look in the mirror and realize that I am relatively lazy, so I've had to become accountable to myself. I set rules about how many shifts I have to work each week and while I still allow my commitment-phobic self to move days and times around, I make sure I work X number of shifts that I decided on. It's kind of funny how we have a job that overall makes soooo much more than everyone else, and we can go in and make that whenever we please, but how often we choose not to work!
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    It has affected me positively. I have become so independent and confident!

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    In the past negatively by getting driving while drunk arrests (2) over a 5yr period. A couple public intoxication arrests. An arrest for not having nipples with tit tape. I was sucked into the hustle of selling drinks!
    I quit awhile and came back to not drinking anymore and work at club that don't have to sell drinks. I hate those clubs that do. It also better because the house mom has a cordless phone and we don't carry our phones on floor , so when guys ask for your number we give them club's number and the house mom takes the calls and will tell them if you are there that night. So we don't give out a number of our own to be followed home or a guy to turn into a stalker. That was also something negative that has happened to me. A few different times in the past a stalker tracking me down and leaving things on my car etc. That has made me a paranoid scared freak!!! I still get scared at night and think every noise is a stalker lol.

    Positively: money, easy schedule with freedom to travel and meet all kinds of people

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    Made me 100x more confident
    Made me independent

    Crap relationship with family because of it
    And over jealous friends

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    I've been surprised at they types of men attracted to me. I never thought men of other races would be interested in me but I was wrong and now I can pick up on the vibe easier. I also like feeling confident and in control of my sexuality and know that I can earn money from something men and some women desire.

    On the flip side , I don't feel fully comfortable because I still live a double life and don't like the fact that most people view this career field in a negative light even though it can be done responsibly. For this reason I have constant anxiety and have to adjust to relieve the stress.

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    This industry taught me how to say no, to be assertive and to value myself and my body. When I started dancing at 18 I had never seen beautiful powerful and independent women like the strippers at my first club and that for me was eye opening and inspiring. I think dancing for me at 18 was very very positive and tbh probably saved my life. Is it positive for me now? I am starting to think maybe not I feel like it's important to keep growing and I think stripping is a little stagnant for me. I think it's going to be very hard to stop. As others mentioned I also lie all the time lately even in situations where lying is unecesary. It's just become a habit but it feels super uncomfortable and weird. I also tend to look at most relationships romantic and otherwise as highly transactional eg what does this person need from me and how can I exploit that to my ultimate advantage? Considering the length of time I've been dancing though idk what changes are from dancing and which are just from growing up!

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    Default Re: Do you feel working in this industry has changed you

    Also I think that this question is hard to answer cos i started dancing when i was 20 and now im 27. I think most people are gonna change uite significantly during those years regardless of what job they are doing.

    Dancing gave me confidence in myself and financial independence. It also gave me the opertunity to travel and get away from bad influences in my life.In a way starting dancing kinda saved me from a life of drug addiction and crime.But It probably made things worse to begin with since i suddenly had loads of money to spend on drugs.I had to make the decision to move away from my friends and start again in a different city.But if i hadnt been a dancer it would have been a lot harder.

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