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Thread: Complicated situation... what can i do?

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    Dizzy Complicated situation... what can i do?

    Thank you for all the answers <3
    Last edited by ChefKitty; 09-13-2014 at 08:45 PM.

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    take it as a lesson learned. Don't shit where you eat. there is probably NOTHING you can do about this.

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    dude, sounds like you need to start making some better life choices.
    The best thing i have heard in a strip club to date:
    customer: we should get married right now! we should get a shotgun marriage!
    me: uhh... i think you are misunderstanding what a shotgun marriage means. A shotgun marriage means you knock me up and my daddy shows up at your door with a gun and forces you to marry me and raise the baby. You mean elope.
    customer: hmm... nah actually i will take the shotgun marriage. At least then we would be having sex.


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    God/dess chanzep's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    Just learn from this find a new club and a new house if you can and don't mix your life up, don't fuck people you work with.
    xoxo

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    Featured Member kaninchen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    It's probably not going to be in your best interest to explain yourself and tell corporate that you had non-professional relations with club employees. If I were in your shoes, I'd say fuck it, chalk it up to experience, and move on. Actually, I have been in your shoes before, and that's exactly what I did.

    Not Sleeping With Co-Workers is a really hard lesson to learn and I think plenty of people learn it the hard way, so there's no shame in that. But from now on, please try to keep it in your pants!

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    While I strongly advocate the "don't shit where you eat" rule I realize that...well...shit happens. You don't choose who you're attracted to and I don't blame you for liking somebody you work with. You obviously didn't try to get yourself into this situation so don't beat yourself up. If this guys the manager now, I'm gonna say you're probably not gonna get your job back and even if you did this guy would make your life a living hell even if you didn't work the same shifts as him you would probably still bump into him often enough and this guy sounds psychotic. Do yourself a favor and stay away. Do yourself another favor and be a little more discerning when it comes to guys. Get to really know someone before you pursue anything ESPECIALLY if you work together. A guy like that can't hide his psycho behavior for very long so if you had probed about his past a little bit you probably would have dug up some land mines.
    Plus even if a guy isn't off his rocker he could still be wrong for you and then it's super awkward working together. I've never dated a coworker but I did have a MAJOR interest with a certain male at my current club for a while. I never clued him in on it because I wanted to befriend him and find out more. Turns out his long term plans didn't even remotely match up to what I want in life. He wanted at least 3 kids, I want 1 at most, he wanted to move to a rural town eventually and I love the city, he wasn't super interested in traveling and it's my dream to travel the world. also his taste in music was SO far from mine, his hobbies were not things I could find myself interested in (he loves fishing, hunting, camping), his friends were super nice but a little stupid, and he has a lot of pets to take care of and while I love animls I don't want to live with more than one.
    What I'm getting at is there is NOTHING wrong with this guy at all but he's not a good match for ME and if we had dated I would have found that out and then hurt his feelings. Instead, we're just friends, I go to his house and watch movies, we gossip about all the girls, I found a boyfriend who's compatible with me, he started seeing someone, and our friendship is awesome.

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    never ever ever ever mix business with pleasure. there are plenty of men in this world, you don't need to fuck the people you work with.
    "Unless it's mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it's a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldn't be one of them." - Dream for an Insomniac

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    Featured Member Nina_'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    Sounds like you've gotten yourself into a mess... As long as A is the manager and doesn't want to allow you to work there, you probably don't have much of a chance to work there unless you were really tight with the upper level management/whoever his boss is. If you want to get your spot back there, you should talk to A about it and try not to seem confrontational. He's the manager now, unfortunately, so he is in control.

    I can't stress enough how much of a general bad idea it is to date guy you work with... I almost dated a guy I worked with. He worked for the talent agency that I'm with at a couple clubs I worked at. Maybe things could've gone better, but he wasn't able to handle his job. It just caused drama and now I know not to do it ever again.
    "Rather have my feet hurting than my pockets."

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    although it is a bad, bad idea to sleep with co-workers i totally understand..for a lot of adults, your life is work, sleep, work. you don't have much of a social life outside of work especially if you don't have many friends outside of the business or you are in a new area. i've always gotten myself into this pitfall ( almost every bf/fuckbuddy i've had i've met through work) because i don't have time in my life for anything but work and being in this industry you gravitate more towards people who are involved in it somehow because besides not having much time for anything else you just don't have anything in common with vanilla people or time for them. soo i sympathize chef kitty!!! it sucks, but i'd just leave it behind ! good luck

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    I dated one of the cooks when I worked at the Spearmint Rhino in Albuquerque YEARS ago. He wound up being a terrible cook and giving all the girls the shits. Guess who got the rap for it? LOL Sometimes it works but 98% of the time it blows up in your face. Take it as a lesson learned and move on. Sometimes it is nice to meet someone outside of the asylum.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: Complicated situation... what can i do?

    Dont tell your manager its just gonna be gossip that is going to spread around like honey on toast. I would suggest to never date bouncers djs managers because its just to much business going around unless you like the drama. Then you have controlling people to tell you what you can and cant do also no offense but you should be dating a guy with a good job not a guy taht works in the industry there is only room for one
    pink lemonaid

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