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Thread: Have You Ever Been Outted?

  1. #26
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    *hugs* Marina, I hope you can get past this and get to the bottom of it. Perhaps they weren't staring because of your camming situation, but because you were outed as trans? I've thought of the possibility of me getting caught/outed several times and I've come to the conclusion that the only people who really deserve an explanation is my family. And even so, what can they say/do, I'm grown and none of them pay my bills. I tend to isolate myself anyway, I purposely don't live anywhere near my family though they are amazing, it's just how things are for me because of my past. So, in the extremely rare (but awkward) moment that they "know" I can continue to live my life without really giving two shits as I don't speak to them regularly anyway. I'll just be the niece/cousin/grand daughter/daughter who is a virtual stripper/phone sex operator, they can take it or leave it. I mean, my mom would have a fit, but I would simply tell her that maybe if she was around more and didn't drop me off with strangers who had horny sons I would probably be a different person. All she and my grand mother can do is pray for me haha. My point being, I'm already living like I have leprosy, what's anything else gonna do to effect me? I was a victim of sexual abuse so if they want a victim, I can play that card too lol.

    In terms of career and business, well I don't mind packing my shit up and moving as I have wonderlust. I've always wanted to live in Europe. Or, a simple change of the business name would put a stop to that and I wouldn't even have to show up to the offie if I hired an office manager and several employees. We can still live happily ever after even if we do get outed. Kim Kardashian has her boring sex video all over the place and that bitch is still banking and society doesn't completely hate her.

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  3. #27
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Thank you, BB! I think it's hard for me to explain but I'm very good at picking up on if someone is looking at me because I'm Trans or if it's something else. The stares/whispers I'm getting lately are just more than usual. I guess it's a double edged sword when you're in a unique situation like mine. I just could feel something fishy is up.
    Quote Originally Posted by kortneykay View Post
    *hugs* Marina, I hope you can get past this and get to the bottom of it. Perhaps they weren't staring because of your camming situation, but because you were outed as trans? I've thought of the.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Have you thought about confronting your sister in a not so much accusatory way? lol.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Quote Originally Posted by kortneykay View Post
    Have you thought about confronting your sister in a not so much accusatory way? lol.
    This is a good idea...
    Just be like...hey you didn't tell anyone right? nonchalantly..

    If she says no its still a good idea to reinforce she shouldn't tell anyone, not because you don't want everyone to find out but for your safety.
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  7. #30
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    We haven't spoken since I came out to her. I saw her a few days ago at a family get together. I said hi to her but she didn't say hi back. I could see the look of judgement on her face.
    Quote Originally Posted by kortneykay View Post
    Have you thought about confronting your sister in a not so much accusatory way? lol.

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    Veteran Member Rosemary Rabbit's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    -----
    Last edited by Rosemary Rabbit; 07-10-2017 at 01:09 PM.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Ouch....yep, pretty safe bet it was the sis, but whether or not it was intentional or malicious is up for debate.I'm sure you'll know in time..

    I'm hoping she will eventually come around, my sibling is crazy and I had to cut him completely our of my life for almost a full yr last yr.we have since started speaking again, but it'll be a long time before our relationship is back to what it was..

    My heart cries for yours,I personally know how devastating and painful sibling betrayal can be.I hope in time your relationship will be mended..
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  12. #33
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?


    Quote Originally Posted by Rosemary Rabbit View Post
    Being insanely close to my sisters, this pulled a heartstring pretty hard. You know, if you wanted to adopt a few of us, we would be awesome sisters who would never ever do this 'cause we like love you and junk. <3
    Quote Originally Posted by VoluptiousBriadda View Post
    Ouch....yep, pretty safe bet it was the sis, but whether or not it was intentional or malicious is up for debate.I'm sure you'll know in time..

    I'm hoping she will eventually come around, my sibling is crazy and I had to cut him completely our of my life for almost a full yr last yr.we have since started speaking again, but it'll be a long time before our relationship is back to what it was..

    My heart cries for yours,I personally know how devastating and painful sibling betrayal can be.I hope in time your relationship will be mended..

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Yes, Marina, You did read about that in a past post of mine. I say "always trust Your Gut", and better 'Safe, than sorry'.
    Back in the day, I remember a fellow dancer told me that~"What You are speaks so loudly, I can't hear what You're saying". It was her reply to my being so annoyed when a date, or random person woud instantly ask if I was an adult performer, even though I tried to hide it. She said that we carry ourselves differently, even if we are in sweats, and a sweatshirt(hair in a bun,and glasses on, and no makeup). It did serve me well when working in corporate, because I was never afraid of public speaking, and saw every guy as a client from the club, so my leadership skills were off the charts, compared to the girls who acted so shy and always afraid of our bosses.

    The world has, and is, continuing to change, (sad to say), and becoming more and more blatantly violent. I am feeling that You should be careful, and be on the 'down low'. At least until You feel otherwise. You'll know when the storm has passed.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    I still can't understand why people care about OTHER PEOPLE'S choices that don't affect them or hurt anyone. Is caring or being mad about other people's choices supposed to make them suddenly change their minds? Because that shit does not work lol.

    When people have done this to me, I go with the whole "ONE DAY WE ARE ALL GOING TO BE DEAD AND DUMB CRAP YOU CARED TOO MUCH ABOUT WON'T MATTER" and then they usually come to their senses. But its true. One day we will all be dead or dying or too old to function and the things you cared too much about won't matter, and the things you didn't care enough about (like FRIENDSHIPS) will be all you regret.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    The census from a couple years ago said there are 38K people in our town. I'm really not ready to be outed. When the day comes, I hope I can be witty and not freak out like I expect myself to. My partner doesnt let anything phase him. I wish I knew how he lacks embarrassment completely. I was already known for erotic photos on the net right after highschool and some little birdies told me guys in 11th and 12th grade were looking at them IN CLASS >.< better start memorizing my comeback for when it happens. Something along the lines of " I make more working from home doing things most couples do for free,I get as many sick days as I want and I'm not hurting anyone, sounds good doesnt it" But if It's family and they dont approve, then there will definitely be some distance. It's alright though since most of my family does not have that thing you call a heart. If anyone of you gets found out in the near future, just stay strong and dont let them make you quit!

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  17. #37
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Thank you and I am sorry for what happened to you. I'm glad you have such strong will to push through it.
    Quote Originally Posted by foxxyredd33 View Post
    Marina Starr I'm so sorry that happened to you! I was outed by my a person I thought was my friend, and I know that it can be a difficult situation to deal with. I live in a small town with around 800 or so people so I know it made the 'rounds'. I went through the 5 stages of grief when I coped. Denial-no she didn't!, Anger-how could she?!, Bargaining- please god don't let my family hate me and I'll do......, Depression-we all know what's that's like. For me, it was refusing to get out of bed, work, crying etc. and Acceptance. I had to accept the fact what's done is done and although I'm angry/hurt what good will my anger/hurt do for me? Yes, people are giving me weird looks, asking asinine questions which are none of their business, and in general things are less than ideal. I also know the same people aren't paying my bills, I'm nothing to them except a subject of conversation/speculation-they have nothing better to do, I'm not doing anything illegal, and I will get through this. Soon something else will come up about someone else and I'll be forgotten for some new juicy bit of gossip. If they're talking about me they're giving some other pour soul a much needed break. Although I know it's hard to believe right now things will get better for you lady. Good luck with everything.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Quote Originally Posted by foxxyredd33 View Post
    Marina Starr I'm so sorry that happened to you! I was outed by my a person I thought was my friend, and I know that it can be a difficult situation to deal with. I live in a small town with around 800 or so people so I know it made the 'rounds'. I went through the 5 stages of grief when I coped. Denial-no she didn't!, Anger-how could she?!, Bargaining- please god don't let my family hate me and I'll do......, Depression-we all know what's that's like. For me, it was refusing to get out of bed, work, crying etc. and Acceptance. I had to accept the fact what's done is done and although I'm angry/hurt what good will my anger/hurt do for me? Yes, people are giving me weird looks, asking asinine questions which are none of their business, and in general things are less than ideal. I also know the same people aren't paying my bills, I'm nothing to them except a subject of conversation/speculation-they have nothing better to do, I'm not doing anything illegal, and I will get through this. Soon something else will come up about someone else and I'll be forgotten for some new juicy bit of gossip. If they're talking about me they're giving some other pour soul a much needed break. Although I know it's hard to believe right now things will get better for you lady. Good luck with everything.
    And here I was worrying about being outed to a town thats 10xs the size of yours.I give you major kudos for being so strong,I can only imagine how brutal its been for you ...I love that you look at it as giving some other poor soul a break - that never even occurred to me,and Im def gonna hold strong to that thought when my own time comes..

    *sigh* Im hurting for everyone so much right now...I know that its part of the job and that we should expect it to happen,but that still doesnt make it any easier when it actually DOES.Especially when you add in the betrayal factor- sooo many family and "friends" end up stabbing camgirls in the back and outing them,its just so so sad
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?


    Quote Originally Posted by foxxyredd33 View Post
    You will make it through this as well. You've already overcome so much in your life and I have deep admiration for you. It sounds far fetched now I'm sure, but this is just something that will make you stronger if that is at all possible. You're seem to be already there.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Today was the first time someone admitted to recognizing me. He was in free chat and had specific info about where I grew up and where I live now (he guessed within a few miles). I did not answer any questions, and I banned him quickly before he could blab any more with his rapid-fire questions.

    Yep, always knew this day would come, but I'm at peace with it surprisingly. Thanks to *many* of you here, I had already taken precautions, and some things like this guy I just can't do anything about. If I had geo-blocked my area, it would have wiped out LA, Orange County and San Diego. Too much money here to miss out on, and many of my regs are here.

  24. #41
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Do you think he will start outting you to random ass people?

    Quote Originally Posted by Via Flaminia View Post
    Today was the first time someone admitted to recognizing me. He was in free chat and had specific info about where I grew up and where I live now (he guessed within a few miles). I did not answer any questions, and I banned him quickly before he could blab any more with his rapid-fire questions.
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.



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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Quote Originally Posted by Marina Starr View Post
    Do you think he will start outting you to random ass people?
    Love that pic.
    I don't know. It could be anyone. I don't really keep up with high school friends, just a few girls, so it's possible this is a past coworker, or maybe it's someone in my life now. A friend of a friend? The husband of a friend? I am studying for my private pilot's license, and I'm around mostly men at the flight school and airports. Maybe it's someone there. Because I am in my early forties, that's a lot of hard miles and paths crossed for me, and man oh man, it's a small world.

    Your question is a really good question and thought provoking. I'll certainly continue following the good advice here. I'm going to keep camming and enjoying what I'm doing.

    I have deep compassion for anyone who suffers consequences as a result of outing, especially if it's malicious.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Last month someone recognized me and he kept cool about it. But I felt weird that someone has found me already.

    But today, another dude found me and said I remind him of his friend, THEN sent me a Facebook private message asking me do I remember him, at same time? Damn. I looked at the phone while in the freechat and looked like I am busted. Then he said keep it cool and will keep it low profile and then said mmmmm. He asked me if I wanna know where he saw me and I said tell my husband. He said nooo he won't and y husband jumped in the conservation cuz we share Facebook together and the dude didnt think twic beforehand. Haha. Glad the dude is all cool about it but hope he doesn't tell my friends.




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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Quote Originally Posted by Via Flaminia View Post
    Today was the first time someone admitted to recognizing me. He was in free chat and had specific info about where I grew up and where I live now (he guessed within a few miles). I did not answer any questions, and I banned him quickly before he could blab any more with his rapid-fire questions.

    Yep, always knew this day would come, but I'm at peace with it surprisingly. Thanks to *many* of you here, I had already taken precautions, and some things like this guy I just can't do anything about. If I had geo-blocked my area, it would have wiped out LA, Orange County and San Diego. Too much money here to miss out on, and many of my regs are here.
    Geoblock doesn't work. I can co-sign that I had California blocked, was streaming from California, and many people who lived there including one who knew me, was in my chat room. lol.

    I'm pretty sure that everyone on Streamate has people they know who go in their chat room and recognize them. The difference is, most of them don't have the balls to say anything. Or they are probably getting off the fact that you have no idea they are watching you.

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    Tired Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    So I'm a total lurker here but did a little experiment a few days ago and, reading this thread, thought it might be useful to post. Even if it's just so that someone can point out some errors in my method! I used 3 sites over the course of about 5 hours: SM, MFC and naked. I've been camming on all but SM for about 5 months, SM for about a week. SM made me the most money per hour than I've ever made but when I started reading about the whole affiliate thing on here over the past week it kinda started freaking me out and sparked said experiment. I signed on each site on a computer then tried to find myself on a separate laptop (with safari, Firefox and IE, each with and without a proxy and through an "anon site") PC (same as laptop,) iPhone, jailbroken iPhone with an anonymous browser and my iPad.

    Results were: I could NOT find myself on MFC except when using a computer with either an "anon site" or through a proxy. SM I could find myself on EVERY device except for the computers using regular browsing. On naked I only found myself using the computer's via a foreign proxy and on my jailbroken iPhone.

    This obviously could differ day-to-day or by the proxies used, or the state or the country, etc., etc., etc. BUT it definitely dissuaded me from continuing to use SM. Considering the HUGE amount of money that I made there, especially over this past weekend, I'm pretty damned disappointed...but thought I should share my efforts to figure this whole geo-blocking thing out.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    That is the beauty of classic chat on SM. One what idiot says, the others won't see. Today I had a guy stop in my chat, and I'm pretty sure he used to live/work in the same town where I lived for the last 6 years. He probably worked at the resort where a family member used to work as well. I wanted to scream, I totally know where you used to live dude, but I kept my calm. lol My partner has plenty of guns and crazy to keep me safe, and parents are far far away from here, so I don't care much if I get outted, but I'm still trying to stay reasonably safe, and not put myself out there for stupid reasons.

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  35. #47
    God/dess Marina Starr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    You could be outted for working on ANY site so why not maximize your income and work for the site that you could make the most money on?
    Quote Originally Posted by Anabelle View Post
    This obviously could differ day-to-day or by the proxies used, or the state or the country, etc., etc., etc. BUT it definitely dissuaded me from continuing to use SM. Considering the HUGE amount of money that I made there, especially over this past weekend, I'm pretty damned disappointed...but thought I should share my efforts to figure this whole geo-blocking thing out.
    Quote Originally Posted by ~Carmen~ View Post
    I can see you being 90 and flipping your long hair, still teasing the boys.



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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Quote Originally Posted by Anabelle View Post
    So I'm a total lurker here but did a little experiment a few days ago and, reading this thread, thought it might be useful to post. Even if it's just so that someone can point out some errors in my method! I used 3 sites over the course of about 5 hours: SM, MFC and naked. I've been camming on all but SM for about 5 months, SM for about a week. SM made me the most money per hour than I've ever made but when I started reading about the whole affiliate thing on here over the past week it kinda started freaking me out and sparked said experiment. I signed on each site on a computer then tried to find myself on a separate laptop (with safari, Firefox and IE, each with and without a proxy and through an "anon site") PC (same as laptop,) iPhone, jailbroken iPhone with an anonymous browser and my iPad.

    Results were: I could NOT find myself on MFC except when using a computer with either an "anon site" or through a proxy. SM I could find myself on EVERY device except for the computers using regular browsing. On naked I only found myself using the computer's via a foreign proxy and on my jailbroken iPhone.

    This obviously could differ day-to-day or by the proxies used, or the state or the country, etc., etc., etc. BUT it definitely dissuaded me from continuing to use SM. Considering the HUGE amount of money that I made there, especially over this past weekend, I'm pretty damned disappointed...but thought I should share my efforts to figure this whole geo-blocking thing out.
    ^ For geoblocking, I had it activated for about a week when I first started camming (on SM). I cannot remember exactly which area I activated, but it was a specific circumference. I asked my boyfriend and best friend (the only two people I have confided in re: camming) to test the geoblock. They are located within the circumference, in the same city and live about 2 miles from each other. Results were inconsistent, and one night one person saw me on SM and the other did not.

    Edit: They tested other things as well, like going outside the area and looking. This was also inconsistent. I concluded leaving it off is best.

    Geez, to me it should either work or not work, granted I'm not an IT person, so maybe steady, successful geoblocking is easier said than done (?).

    I also cam on another site, and I don't geoblock there, either.

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  39. #49
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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    My husband found me in the same house, yet I couldn't see myself most times. Doesn't work and def doesn't hide your vids from tubesites lol.

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    Default Re: Have You Ever Been Outted?

    Wasn't really outted because I told my family already and they are cool with it. BUT I do have a cousin who tried camming after she saw that I was able to take care of myself and my son just by camming. She tried it and it didn't work out for her, so for the past few months she's been coming to my chatroom under a different name harassing me, not knowing I know it's her the whole time just by the way she types. One day she came to my room and said, Ur so conceited ur a bitch ur so into urself blah blah blah. My guys were like, what's wrong with that person they must have a grudge against you. The next time she came to my room, she was saying, I'm gonna expose u bitch. That time I called out her real name and said, (her name) I already expose myself online so what the hell is your problem?? She left after that. Then another time she came to my room, she was talking about something only she would know from being my friend on facebook. So she came to my room and said, Oh u went to vegas and had a good time huh u think ur all that guess what bitch u aint shit. I didn't tell any of the guys I went so they didn't know what the hell was going on lol. It's so weird because she doesn't talk to me on fb and avoids family events yet she comes to my chat room talking nonsense. Clearly she has issues lol. I wouldn't ask her if she's the one whose doing those things in person because I already know what kind of person she is so I'm not even gonna waste my time. I just know she's a jealous person who has no life and no job and is miserable. I remember one time we went to the club, me, her, and another one of our cousins, and this lame ass local rapper was trying to talk to me. I could care less but the look on her face was like, evil or something. Like she was mad he wasn't talking to her. She's really into rappers and athletes and even tried to be on the bad girls club. She hasn't been to my chatroom for about a month but I'm pretty sure she'll be making her rounds lol.

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