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Thread: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

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    Arrow Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

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    Last edited by gingersnap; 02-06-2015 at 06:37 AM.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't *like* it, but I'll allow it. I'm okay with touching the back and legs. If they try to go anywhere else, I'll dance "defensively" and most of them seem to realize it's not okay.
    If anyone outright touches somewhere else, I tell them it's not allowed and it's their only warning. If they do it again, I'll stop the dance and collect.
    Also when it's busy, my club managers or bouncers will be rounding with flashlights, so just their presence is enough to deter most guys from really pushing it. I'm not in the minority either though, we have tons of signs in the back about touching rules and most of our girls are very "Hell no, you can't touch my boobs, for $10 *I* set the boundaries!"

    If they're not listening to you, stand your ground. That shit's not cool. Set your boundaries and stick to it. It may make them get less dances, but you'd probably rather have that then deal with Octopus McFeely for 2 more songs.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't like it. But it happens. Clubs have various levels of contact. If that level of contact is permitted in that club, the customers will probably touch the dancers and some sneaky dudes will try and push those boundaries further. It's annoying but it comes with the territory if the club allows that sort of thing.

    When customers ignore my warnings, I act sad/upset rather than angry. They get the message then. Ugh. It's a pain but it's effective.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    no i of course i don't like it! SOME touching ill allow, my club is extremely flooded with girls and competition is fierce so ill allow legs, thighs, back, not pussy though. i hate that. set your own boundaries, everyone has them. honestly even when the club rules are NO contact they'll still try and other girls will still let them..so just stick to what you are comfortable with

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I tell guys up front that my contact rules are 'No junk, & no boobs, everything else is ok.' I allow it more just so I know where their hands are - I despise being touched by strangers but even more than that, I hate surprises.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't think I've ever met a stripper who "likes" being touched during a lap dance. Lol. I don't let them touch any of the three areas, and if they start trying to rub my thighs or waist I will move their hands.

    If they wan't to "touch" or set their hand on my thighs or waist minus the creepy rubbing I will allow that.

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    God/dess chanzep's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't like it, most guys are ok but a guy bit my nipple so I punched him in the head and he was shocked.
    xoxo

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't really mind it, for the most part. I started dancing and mainly continue to dance in a very high contact area, and while there are the odd rough customers, most are fairly gentle and just want to cuddle or engage in sensual contact (face touching, back/shoulder rubs, running fingers through hair, etc.). I've worked in non-contact clubs and found it awkward and hard to sell dances, but, again, starting in high contact so I just 'grew up' with it and am fairly comfortable allowing it.

    Long story short, I don't like it as in I would do it for free or look forward to it, but I am not at all bothered by it provided the customer is respectful and not rough.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I dont see a look of disgust like how I feel.
    Last edited by gingersnap; 02-06-2015 at 06:38 AM.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    Naturally, I don't think anyone enjoys it-but if you work in a touching club, then it's a necessary evil and you become desensitized to it or used to it over time.

    When working in a non touching club, I will allow customers to either place their arm over my shoulder or around my waist on the floor (as long as it's friendly and there are no wondering hands). Often it's only a natural reaction and they do this in a response to me either touching their arm as we speak or placing my hand loosely on their back or as they lean in to hear me over the music etc. But, during a dance I wont even let a customer (big spender or not) touch my legs (this has never impacted on my earnings either).

    If you feel violated then a touching club isn't worth the mental stress. Trying a non touching club if possible is a good option if you wish to maintain your sanity. Working in a club where the "non touching" rule isn't enforced isn't fun, but you just have to get more creative in how you avoid Mr. Handsy pants without it impacting on your income.

    I'm sure there's info' in Hustle Hut about how to approach this this . But IMO:
    *Become a master of conversation (it's amazing how this actually increases your money, helps you obtain and keep regulars and expands your niche customer base)!
    *If a custy goes to touch you-hold their hands above their head as if you are being "kinky" or "dominant". Guys seems to react well to this and you are protecting yourself.

    Assert your boundaries and remove yourself from any situation that greatly compromises them. For example, if someone has already paid and becomes handsy give them a warning and if they are a repeat offender then it's your right to end the dance without giving them a refund!
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I dont think you should dance if it affects you that much. If you have to "tell yourself its okay."

    I don't think most of the women I work with are drunk or high either. They're just able to separate their stage personality from who they really are and are really good actresses.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    Most of the ones trying or touching me have no clue how to touch a women correctly. I feel they are trying to rip my skin off or just simply do not know the right way. If they knew how to touch without being a rapist or molester it would be different. Telling someone no and, they do it anyway reminds of a molester. They must be like that with their women and dates. Women never try to rip my skin off or touch me in molester way in the club.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't allow much touching outside VIP, but I don't mind it all unless the guy is totally gross. Sometimes I can kind of like it or find it exciting depending on the guy (rarely). But, like you said, I'm usually drunk...

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    Quote Originally Posted by lokikola View Post
    They're just able to separate their stage personality from who they really are and are really good actresses.
    ^This is a great ability to have. We can all benefit from it
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I'm kind of going against the grain on this one, but I like being touched (in the right way & the right places). No vag obviously but the back and hips are fine. I find it easier to dance when being gently touched and awkward when there is no touching. To me no human contact feels like dancing for a statue or something. I should mention that my area is EXTREMELY high contact so like a previous poster mentioned the girls at our club are somewhat desensatized to it.
    I'd grab my trumpet and I'd do a stripper sound, like the old Louis Armstrong, real raspy. And the people would go nuts! Then I knew that the sexual, sensual, guttural sound, that throbbing sound, is where it's at.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    Quote Originally Posted by gingersnap View Post
    I think I dont understand how other dancers seem to not cringe or look bothered by it. Like if they are turned away from the guy, I dont see a look of disgust like how I feel.
    Money. Money is excellent motivation to hone those acting skills.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    In my club during dances they can touch your back but and thighs. During rooms your boobs as week. I like this it makes it easy to make a connection with them that gets them to spend more cash plus get feedback throu body language.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I hate it but I've always worked in clubs with a no-touch rule so the guys basically have to sit on their hands the entire time.
    Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I work in an extremely high contact club and the only time I am bothered by normal touching is during single dances with dudes my stripper senses tell me won't tip. Those are the only dudes I make keep their hands at their sides. Otherwise, obviously stuff like my nipples or pussy are no-gos but a hand on my hip? Nah. Doesn't bother me.

    ETA: I confess to loving the shit out of back rubs and foot rubs no matter who is giving them. But "like" doesn't really apply any other time.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I think the better question is how many of us are tolerant of touching, not whether or not we like it.

    My home club was a no-touch club, which I had a love/hate relationship with before I got friendly with the bouncers. It's really a turn off to the customers when they're not doing anything more than sitting their hands on your legs comfortably, being completely respectful, and some big jerk starts barking at them about "NO TOUCHING!" like they've got my boob in their mouth or something. Granted, those customers can be far and few between, but you don't need that kind of hostile interjection when you find them and, on a subconscious level to me, it feels like a subtle insult from staff, like they think I'm too weak to even set my own boundaries, much less enforce them.
    Once I got friendly with the bouncers though, they started realizing that I DID set boundaries and was not afraid to stand up for myself, walk out, and/or call them if something was hinky. They still poked their head in on me for the obvious safety reasons, but they didn't bug me/customers about innocent types of touching like my legs or rubbing my back or feet.
    Some times, it just feels more natural if there's some kind of mild touching, like putting their hands on my legs, but it's less that I liked it and more so that it just seems normal in situations where you're as close to another person as you are during a lapdance. If they touched me in a way that I'm not comfortable with, I used a three strike system on it; I'll ask politely the first time, I'll tell them the second, and walk out/call a bouncer the third.

    Overall, unless you're rubbing my back or feet during the dance (something that benefits ME just as much or more so than the customer), I don't like it but I would tolerate it because it just seems awkward for a guy to have to sit with his hands behind his back or hanging limply. My boobs, butt, and groin area were (and I think always will be) 100% off limits to customers. A little touching can add to the experience for the customer and some times even myself under the right circumstances, and for the right price (if you're touching anything other than my legs, I better be getting tipped for it, even in the case of back/foot rubs, and especially in the case of my hair), but I'm an entertainer, not sex doll.
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I danced a few years ago in a club that allowed touching anywhere but between the legs. And some guys wanted mouth to breast contact too. And a lot wanted to touch anywhere and everywhere! Quit after 2 days :p Just can't handle that type of thing. I prefer the no touching clubs. Some guys brush their hand lightly along my hip/butt if I'm sitting next to them in the CR, but that's it.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    Quote Originally Posted by gingersnap View Post
    Most of the ones trying or touching me have no clue how to touch a women correctly. I feel they are trying to rip my skin off or just simply do not know the right way. If they knew how to touch without being a rapist or molester it would be different. Telling someone no and, they do it anyway reminds of a molester. They must be like that with their women and dates. Women never try to rip my skin off or touch me in molester way in the club.
    yes, I know exactly the type of customer you are talking about, and I often wonder if they have ever even been intimate with a woman in real life, the way they grab is that inappropriate. While it really seems to be a regional thing, when I come across these guys they are more often than not from India or Mexico, or an older white guy. I think that they realize they're going to get in trouble or you're going to make them stop, so their goal is to quickly feel up your body before that happens, and are oblivious to how uncomfortable they are making you feel. Basically they are horny selfish bastards who are just trying to get away with as much as they can! If its an option, allowing touching during your dances for an additional price can actually help a lot since men are cheap. For example: "its $20 a song but you must keep your arms to the side, or for $60 a song you can touch" this way, if they try to touch during your dance you can tell them if they continue you're going to charge them $60. (also, when you use this tactic you appear less prude or uptight, more gold digger, which they all think we are anyways haha.) hth good luck! also what state do you dance in, just out of curiosity?
    Last edited by keepitclassy; 05-03-2013 at 12:47 AM.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I don't allow it except for one guy that likes to rub my legs but only because he is a real sweetheart. Everyone else I move their hands down to their sides.

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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    I make a point to encourage and compliment customers who are respectful and gentle as I really don't mind this so much, and I want them to know that their respectful behaviour is appreciated so they'll be more likely to keep it up either for me in the future if they buy dances again, or with another dancer. The ones who treat my breasts like squeeze toys? Hell YES I mind, and I make a point to reprimand these kinds of customers. I have also had many customers who like to give massages...you won't hear me complaining about that either! The biggest thing I've noticed is that guys like it/spend more when it appears that you are enjoying yourself. The easiest way to appear as if you are enjoying yourself is to actually enjoy yourself, therefore I don't tolerate anything that really turns me off/makes me uncomfortable. But I've always danced in high contact clubs so I'm probably way more used to it than girls who work at no contact clubs.
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    Default Re: Do you dancers like when customers touch you during lapdances?

    hell no I don't like that

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