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Thread: Stripper haiku

  1. #1
    Featured Member Tsepmet1's Avatar
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    Default Stripper haiku

    Inspired by the camming haiku thread!

    A haiku is a poem with 5 syllables, then 7, then 5 again.

    Strap on my Pleasers
    Oh no, another blister
    Where are my band-aids?

    Would you like some gum?
    We are so close together
    Your breath smells like death

    That'll be twenty
    Would you like another, sir?
    Maybe VIP?

    Would you like a drink?
    I'd love a glass of champagne.
    Dont be cheap, asshole.

    You are so handsome
    I bet all the girls love you
    Take good care of me

    What, you want extras?
    You are in the wrong place, hun
    Don't fucking touch me
    Last edited by Tsepmet1; 05-16-2013 at 02:28 PM.


  2. #2
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    ^Fun and funny
    “Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world” -Marilyn Monroe

    "True sexiness has many facets-confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. It isn’t just about trying to look sexy; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical"-Dita Von Teese

  3. #3
    Featured Member Tsepmet1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    Too bad strippers don't want to play.

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    God/dess simone87's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    i like the breath one hahaha, have soo many customers with breath that would knock a buzzard off a dumpster

    don't touch my pussy
    all the other girls let me
    i am not a whore

    i need your house fee
    fuck all you pimp wanna be's
    put it on my tab

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  6. #5
    Member AnthroGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    Sorry bout your nose
    Pole tricks and slip-ons don't mix
    Give me back my shoe

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  8. #6
    Featured Member Tsepmet1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    ^^ I wish that I could like that more than once. I imagine an eloquent and well-spoken dancer sashaying over to a customer angrily holding a shoe while the other hand clutches his face, and plucking away the shoe with a grin on her face.

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  10. #7
    God/dess papillonluvr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    Some men want house cats
    Well I'm a fucking tiger
    Strutting in high heels


    I dance on a stage
    So it's a stage with a pole
    I'm not less than you


    Dancing on a lap
    Dancing in a VIP
    How did I get here?


    It's been six hours
    My feet are so exhausted
    My liver hates me


    Glitter and glamour
    Flirting with the customers
    Dancing for twenties
    "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories -Stainslaw J. Lec

    Confuscius say: "Man who pull bra stap get bust in face"


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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    What does "later" mean?
    You are a cheap asshole, friend.
    Get the fuck out, please.

    Of course I like you
    I'm not using you for cash
    How 'bout one more dance?

    Have you heard of soap?
    How about basic hygiene?
    Get the fuck out, please.

    Gee, thanks, two dollars
    Such gratuity from you.
    Get the fuck out, please.

    What are you doing?
    Get that finger out of me
    Prepare to die now

    Where is my lipgloss?
    Where is any of my shit?
    What am I doing?

    Out of babywipes
    Will not feel so fresh all night
    Such is my poor life...

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  14. #9
    God/dess papillonluvr's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    I am a stripper
    I only dance for money
    Now fuck you, pay me.
    "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories -Stainslaw J. Lec

    Confuscius say: "Man who pull bra stap get bust in face"


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  16. #10
    Featured Member Tsepmet1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    So burnt out from this
    All I need is one good night
    Where is the money?

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  18. #11
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    My vagina chafes.
    Too many laps in my life.
    Need softer panties.

    Please shave your face well;
    I has razorburn tittties.
    It's not a good look.
    There is no reason to take it up the ass and then act all butthurt.
    -Sophia_Starina

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  20. #12
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    Not this song again
    DJ, what are you doing?
    I tip you well, dude

    Dressing room problems
    Who took my curling iron?
    Oh here's your fishnets

    Let's go to the back
    It's way more private back there
    We'll have lots of fun

    Wait, not that much fun
    Keep your hands to your sides, bro
    Or no tits for you

    Leaving with a stack
    This is why I do this gig
    It's always worth it

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  22. #13
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    my dances are great
    my tits in your face, honey
    only twenty five

  23. #14
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    where is the money
    heart flutters at suit by bar
    shit just the owner

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  25. #15
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    making it rain down
    many ones for the dancers
    tip the ladies well

    sitting on my ass
    damn why is the club so slow
    give me money now

    red lights and blacklights
    cocaine and razor sharp nails
    the club is alive

    pole so slippery
    who the fuck put on lotion
    i will hunt you down

    showers are a thing
    before you come inside, dude
    please wash your face first

    no, i will not dance
    for less than what i ask for
    you are very cheap

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  27. #16
    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    I've never laughed so hard at a thread on SW. These are so good!!!

    i need your house fee
    fuck all you pimp wanna be's
    put it on my tab
    ^Next time door girl asks for house fee, telling her to put it on my tab. Genius.
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

  28. #17
    Veteran Member summerbre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stripper haiku

    I don't do dances
    Let me just buy you a drink
    …Where are you going?!

    You're too good for this
    Says the Captain Save-a-Hoe,
    Ogling my tits

    Hundred bucks an hour
    To flirt, drink and hold the power?
    Best. Damn. Job. Ever.
    “The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
    - Anne Morris

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