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Thread: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

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    Default Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    I'm thinking of stripping as a way to pay for my college education and avoid putting my parents in debt. I think I might be good at it. I did intense ballet growing up, and it's kept me in good shape and made me very graceful. I've always been very comfortable with my body and my sexuality, and I enjoy talking to people and making conversation. In short, I think I could make a lot of money and that this could be a good opportunity for me.

    The only problem is I'm afraid to actually go audition and work. I'm afraid the second I walk in I'll suddenly hate myself, or that I'll be intimidated and completely freeze up.
    I'm also afraid of losing money initially. I read that a new girl who doesn't know what she's doing can lose $100 in a night. My parents are paying for everything for me, and I only have $300 of my own savings right now.
    I'd have to keep stripping a secret from my family, everyone I know, and my future colleagues and employers. Is that all possible?
    I'm also afraid of rowdy clients, stalkers, excessive groping, drugs, catfights: basically every horror story. I read that these aren't really problems in an upscale club, but would I be able to start in an upscale club? Are there any upscale clubs in Connecticut? I don't think I'll be able to travel out of state every night.
    Lastly, I've never actually given a lap dance before in my life. Is that something you pick up on the job?

    Any advice you guys could offer would be great. Thanks so much

    P.S. I really like the name Sylvia, but if that's really awful/hard to pronounce/sounds too much like 'saliva', I was thinking Willow, because I'm tall, pale, and thin.

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    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    VERY long post to answer all your questions:

    The only way to get over the audition thing is to actually do it. It's not as big a deal as girls make it out to be. Don't psych yourself out about it.
    Why would you suddenly hate yourself?

    I've never seen a new girl LOSE money. Usually the managers are pretty understanding and won't let you go into the negatives if you haven't made enough to tip out and pay house, so the worst I've really seen is them breaking even. Maybe I am lucky enough to have managers with a little bit of a conscience though; mine do this even for the established girls, if they've had a rough day and been off their game, or the club has been super dead, they will knock some money off their tipouts. I've also seen a lot of clubs do free house fee for the first 3 shifts.
    Try to go in early when the house fees are very low, so you minimize payout. If you try to start at 8pm on a Friday when the house fees are high and there's house moms to tip out in addition, you will be stressed out about paying that back, in addition to being in the sea of girls and usually crazy atmosphere.

    I have never been found out by anyone. I dance at the largest club in the state, and the only people that know are the people I've told. On the other hand, I dance a good 35 miles away from school, with 3 or 4 other clubs in between, so that helps minimize odds of a professor walking in. Try to dance a good distance away from your school or work, but it's never a guarantee someone won't come in. I would advise to just OWN IT if they do; "Yeah so what? I dance. Big deal. Why are YOU in here?" If they're gonna give you shit for being in there, you can give it right back.

    Yes you can start in an upscale club. I work in a gown club that hires newbies all the time.
    As for your fears:
    - Rowdy clients: You'll eventually turn into a bitch that will just say "Knock it the fuck off" and walk away, or else in any decent club, flag down a floor host or bouncer to help you.
    - Stalkers: have a bouncer/floor host walk you to your car (tip him). My club has a mandatory walk-out procedure, where they walk us all the way to our car and even open the door for us. The girls staying until closing all stay inside until the parking lot has been cleared of any guys who might wait in their cars, and then are walked out as a group. Just be aware when you leave; watch behind in your mirror to see if anybody turns out of the club lot after you, and if so, get to the nearest well-lit area (a gas station, Walmart, etc). Don't have a vanity plate, or a super recognizable car. Some girls even register their license plates to a different address. I drive my boyfriend's car, so if a creep went far enough to run the plates, he'd probably think twice. Read the newbie safety tips sticky.
    - Groping: Again, tell them to knock it off. I give them 3 strikes, and on the 3rd strike I end the dance and they have to pay up. You'll learn to dance "defensively" and be able to avoid much of it. Pinning their hands down is often viewed as "hot", and prevents groping.
    - Drugs and catfights: Just stay out of them. Don't touch shit that isn't yours in the dressing room. Don't gossip. Show up and do your job, be pleasant, but stay out of the other girls' business.

    Yes, you can pick up lap dancing. I think there are videos on Youtube and a thread of them here even.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

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    Veteran Member yinyang's Avatar
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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    It will be hard to keep it a secret from your parents if you're living with them, but if you're on your own, it'll be easier. Keep in mind that they will be curious where you are when you're at work though, and they will also wonder where your money is coming from. You'll probably need to come up with a complicated fake story about what you do for work.

    Also: in some cases, working at a stripclub will show up on your past employment records, whether or not you file taxes. I assume I will never, ever be a politician or work with military/ central intelligence/ police force, etc.

    Thread 1 that mentions this happening:
    https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sh...ckground-check

    And this one, on Paramedic background check:
    https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sh...05#post2440105
    Last edited by yinyang; 05-19-2013 at 01:19 AM.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    I honestly think that if you have a dancers body already, you won't lose money. If you are looking at a club with $100 in fee's ... that's only 5 lap dances.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Quote Originally Posted by yinyang View Post
    Also: in some cases, working at a stripclub will show up on your past employment records, whether or not you file taxes. I assume I will never, ever be a politician or work with military/ central intelligence/ police force, etc.

    Thread 1 that mentions this happening:
    https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sh...ckground-check

    And this one, on Paramedic background check:
    https://www.stripperweb.com/forum/sh...05#post2440105
    NuclearMartini had it come up because she used it to apply for credit. So don't do that.
    TrophyStripper never got back to anyone with *how* it came up... for all we know, she let it slip herself. But she was not denied any licensing, and it sounds like they just gave her hell for not disclosing it, not actually doing it. That's just how I'm reading it though.

    Also, I have heard from some police that they *like* ex-strippers and will assign them to vice squads. Military is a hazy sector, but there are a few girls on here who have passed military security clearance with having stripped and filed 1099s and all that. However, those were civilian jobs. I agree that if you ever want to enter the actual service, be prepared to disclose it and defend it and probably catch hell... not because they have a high chance of finding it, but if they do, there's trouble for failing to disclose it... honesty is the big one with the police and military.

    IMHO, it's very difficult for someone to find out via the paper trail, since dancer licenses require a court order to release (in AZ at least), 1099s have to be requested via 4506-T (very, very few employers actually would do this, except maybe the FBI, and you would know which years and documents they requested; they can also only go 4 years back I believe), and if you don't apply for credit with it, it won't pop up on there. The only person I've heard of really getting found out and caught for stripping is Melonie, via an arrest.

    That's all just my 2 cents. It is so stupid that anyone should need to worry about getting "busted" for doing a legal profession. Fuck this society.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    1. If you walk out of the club owing money on your first few shifts, don't keep dancing. That's the best way to not lose money through stripping. It's ok if it's not for you, just don't push yourself to do it if it's not working.

    2. I hid dancing from everyone in my life for the first two years I did it, and my parents still don't know. They live 5 hours away, and at one point I was dancing on a different continent, so that certainly helps. It's totally hideable if you're a good liar, much harder if you live with them. You know your parents best though, so plan accordingly.

    Your main issue will be explaining how you suddenly have all this money and no longer need their assistance. Waitressing and bartending can be good cover stories, though I recommend you downplay how much you're actually earning if you go that route and don't live extravagantly. In any case, have an airtight excuse for all the money.

    If you need a license in your city, dancing won't be as hideable from future employers. Colleagues? Yes. But a license will likely turn up in a background check.

    3. If you walk into a club for an audition and don't feel safe, don't work there. Pretty simple. Most clubs have bouncers that are there to keep you safe and won't tolerate the behaviour you're afraid of, so you'll be fine. Always tip your bouncers well.

    4. Lap dancing, stage dancing, and hustling are all picked up on the job. Really, you'll be fine. Stripping is less about dancing and more about being sensual and creating rapport with a client.

    5. I prefer Willow to Sylvia.

    6. Welcome and good luck!

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Wow, thanks so much! This is all really helpful.
    I do live with my parents, but I have my own car and they've always been good about giving me space. That, and they believe everything I tell them. I'm going to say I got a job as a waitress. And I don't ever plan on applying for the FBI, so that won't be a problem. I was just worried about pictures showing up on Facebook or something.
    I found a club a good distance away that's supposed to be very, very safe and have very good bouncers. It's a full-nude club, which I don't have a problem with, per se. It'll just be a lot to get used to right off the bat.
    I'm thinking of buying the shoes and clothes tomorrow, practicing in them for a bit, and then calling the club to set up an audition next week. I'm actually really excited! Also I'm leaning towards Willow for my name but I'm still thinking about it. Thanks again!

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Here is a decent video that can give you an basic idea of how to give a lapdance:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dq974WY5dGo

    Some clubs have rules about things like not going down on your knees or keeping one foot on the floor during a dance so check with the club to be sure.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Honestly, don't worry about buying clothes and practicing. You're going to look like a newbie no matter what, so you may as well practice while making $$$! There's also no sense spending too much on clothes when you won't know what works best right now anyway.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    don't ever agree to take pics for the club and don't work big high profile events that you suspect may have a floating photographer taking pics. events like having a feature or an anniversary party or something. otherwise most clubs are strict about phones and pics. I recommend starting on dayshift, usually less fees and uglier girls so itll be easier. if u lose money your first day find a new club. if u lose $ again then. assess your problem. ive never lost $ dancing and the only girls who I know who have are alcoholics or stupid and waste their time. if it was really easy for us to leave in the negative then this wouldnt be much of an industry.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Make sure to watch the other girls and get an idea of what contact levels are acceptable! I can say that that video up above would get you FIRED at the club I work at - we are no/minimal contact with no grinding where I work.

    I've run into people that I know from real life multiple times. Usually it's more weird than anything. I tend to find that if I explain that I keep it private for safety reasons and ask them not to really talk about it, then they respect that. Often if you aren't in context and have strippified yourself, then people don't recognize you as much. I should note that my family knows, my old boss knows, and a number of other people close to me do as well. I've been very fortunate on that front, with having them accept me. (Of course, I do have a degree at this point in my career - after that, my parents were like 'Well, it's her life.')

    As far as shoes go, I'd recommend either of these style-wise for beginners.
    http://www.snaz75.com/pl-kiss-201.html
    http://www.snaz75.com/pl-adore-708.html

    Steer clear of the super thin stiletto heels if you can and get a shoe with some grip on the bottom. Pleasers are some of the best shoes on the market, comfort-wise.

    Also, feel free to PM if you have any more questions.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Okay, I visited the club today, and the bouncer said that since I was under 21 I needed a notarized letter from a parent saying that I could work somewhere that served alcohol. I thought that was a little strange since the legal bartending age in CT is 18. I searched on this site and found a short thread that said that the law only really applies to dancers, but since I can't actually find the law online I'm not sure. The note doesn't have to say I have permission to dance, only to work in a place that serves alcohol. I told my mother I found a cocktail waitressing job and asked her for the letter. I'm a little afraid that she'll find out because of this if the law only applies to dancers.

    The weird part is that after I asked her, she said that since it's been so difficult for me to find a job, I might have more luck as a stripper. She proceeded to name all of the clubs in the area and suggest the nicer ones. I couldn't tell if she was joking. It was really strange. So I might not have to keep it from her after all? I'm still not sure what's up with this letter though.
    Last edited by pirouette; 05-29-2013 at 08:20 PM. Reason: wrote under 18 when I meant under 21

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Are there any other clubs in your area? I'd give them a call to see if they require a letter. That's hardly a foolproof system since anyone could just sign a letter as their parents, so it sounds a little strange.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Keep in mind that they will be curious where you are when you're at work though

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    It has to be notarized by a notary officer and cannot just be signed and I believe her mom would have to be there to sign it.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    Quote Originally Posted by pirouette View Post
    The weird part is that after I asked her, she said that since it's been so difficult for me to find a job, I might have more luck as a stripper. She proceeded to name all of the clubs in the area and suggest the nicer ones. I couldn't tell if she was joking. It was really strange. So I might not have to keep it from her after all? I'm still not sure what's up with this letter though.
    Maybe she saw your internet history? There's nothing to be ashamed about being a stripper. You make plenty of money while keeping your boundaries. Before you work, just know your boundaries and don't let anyone cross it. Try to work at an upscale place, and don't worry about the social stigma. But remember to never give out your real name, and if you don't like the job, you can simply leave.

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    Default Re: Thinking about stripping, but I have some fears?

    I'm stripping to pay for college too. Strip a decent distance from your home, I commute about 30 minutes to NYC to strip. Then also, consider not telling anyone. I mean, no one. Nobody knows I strip, because I don't say anything to ANYBODY. I just say I work at a retail place, and thats it. Thats that. You don't need more explanation. You can also find a place to keep your stripper stuff, I keep mine in a little drawer, but I was thinking about getting a locker somewhere to keep my things in .
    Once you start working, all those preconceived notions about the industry and dancing might become either heightened for a little while or desensitized but I believe its just a job like any other, a fun job for me. Auditioning is not hard, and in some clubs is all BS, I see girls literally just stand there touching their boobs and moving their hips....

    , when I auditioned, I was all nerves, but once you get up there just move to the music, and remember to dance sensually and slowly, I got tipped on my audition, don't think about it as an audition, just get up there and believe you're sexy, if you don't nobody else will.



    You have your reasons for being attracted to being a dancer, whether thats financial needs or just regular curiosity, you just want to , you're an adult, you can make that choice... At the end of the day, at least try, then you can say you tried and at least did something once , You make the choice if thats for you

    Don't worry about losing money, focus, the remedy for worry is focus on making money. I lost some money sometimes, but If I let that ruin my day then I would never make tips because people rarely tip frowning dancers lol. But Hey , heres my two cents girl I'm kind of in the same boat, nobody in my family/friends has found out I strip ....just dont say anything...use a different name at the club and make up a fake biography

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