So...a follow-up to your responses (thank you, by the way), After thinking a lot about it (obsessing, really, and feeling totally like shit), I really think it has to do with my personal insecurities.
It bothered me that people would imply that there were some deeper issues in my marriage (rightfully so, I would assume so as well reading my post as an outsider), but it bugged me because I actually consider myself really happy in my relationship. Very happy actually. My husband is a good man, good to me, and I adore him. I'm not trying to convince anyone of the stability of my marriage, more so just stating the status of it. Hence why I feel like shit about this...
I really think (aside from my curiosity), I felt validated in being on Omegle and having men turned on by me. Not that my husband doesn't tell me I'm beautiful, he does all the time. But having been with him for 5 years, it's kind of become "a given." I hear it from him all the time, so I think I've sort of become use to it.
I felt like Omegle was a reminder to me that other men still thought me to be attractive. It felt good! Reassuring. And so I fed into it.
It makes me feel like shit because I feel like it's completely disrespectful to my husband. He SHOULD be the only opinion that matters to me, but for some reason I feel I need more. I don't know why--I've always been that way. Dancing fulfilled that need for me. It made me feel desirable and upon comparing myself to other women, I felt like I had an advantage. Getting older has taken away a lot of my confidence as well.
I'm not trying to make excuses, but the whole "there must be something wrong in your marriage" comment really freaking irked me. Again, not blaming you for the comment, in fact I rather appreciate it because it made me do some hard thinking about the situation.
I still feel like crap, but I definitely won't be visiting Omegle again. I'd just really like to get over it and move on.
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