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Thread: Relationship Game

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    Default Relationship Game

    So I wont say I am a nice guy because I aint. I'm selfish, greedy, materialistic, vain, hostile...in other words I am human. Now I will say nice guys are good guys and they don't finish last, pushovers and door mats finish last. One can be nice but still retain his spine...no jelly. On to my observation, I see jerks with beautiful or pretty women. They have a girl, exterior is on point....not sure about the internals of the female they are with ie. confidence, self esteem, intelligence, etc. What makes the guy a jerk in my eyes? Well for starters he will sit down while his girl orders the food, once the food is ready she retrieves it. He asks her to get a refill for his drink, etc. He does not pull out her chair or offer his jacket when she is feeling cold...now thats cold literally and figuratively. Now do these guys really get the girl? Is she his, does he have her heart, respect, and admiration? Perhaps the female has low self esteem? Or do women simply like the bad boy I dont give a fudge types who do what they want, when they want.

    "In terms of psychology, "the 'asshole' consists of the following traits: High Extraversion, Low Neuroticism (perhaps), Low Conscientiousness, Low Agreeableness, High Openness to Experience, and a bit of a dip into the dark triad traits (those with an extreme dark triad profile aren't considered sexually attractive)." The dark triad refers to three personality deficiencies: narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy."

    "SBK also raised the question, why do girls want to be with the bad boy?

    He found the answer from Michelle at Girlfriend's Planet who eloquently put it like this, "[Bad Boys] don't really ever commit to you, therefore you're always chasing after them. The challenge! As women, we're kind of wired to think that we can change anyone, and bad boys are no exception."

    So where am I getting at? I am pondering the thought that these women feel they can tame these jerks...make em nice. Take away their bad sauce and lower the heat just a bit. And then...he will be perfect.

    "Maybe for me, it boils down to this old saying, you always want what you can't have.

    Women want some chase, some drama, some intrigue. If it's too easy to get the guy, then she might think, "Wait, he just fell into my lap. This is fishy. Maybe he thinks that I'm too good for him. Cool. I'm too good for him. Wait, if I'm too good for him, then that means I could do better. Next!"

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    Default Re: Jerks, men who cannot be tamed or contained...get the girls or do they?

    And I hate to say this because love is not a game, its love and there should be no mind games. But to actually have a relationship...at least in this day and age, one has to play the game. There is rules about when to call, how to approach, creepy behavior when in reality the shit aint creepy...its endearing to say the least and maybit a bit needy but not creepy...stop being paranoid. Creepy is when they stalk you, creepy is when they leave you 56 voicemails, not creepy is sharing your true and honest feelings for the first time and breaking tradition....but that would be viewed as creepy because its to soon. Telling someone you like them right off the bat is not creep, telling em you wanna marry them within 1 hour of meeting them...well thats nuts.

    I am getting into a rant about how this whole relationship game is swiss cheese...full of holes. Why can't people just be genuine and quit with the mind games. I have spent a lot of time on the PUA forums and its made me hate those men...then again you have women with all the mind games and men just want to get laid. Not all, I should rephrase that...not all men are pigs and not all women are head cases.

    I am just frustrated that there is a lack of proper decency in the romantic world...its all a friggin game.

    P.S. the title should have been, The relationship "game" is poop.
    *Okay just realized now I can edit the the thread title...over and out.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    i just read an article that said women like bad boys because back in the cavemen era you wanted the biggest, baddest dude around to protect you, hunt for you, and to scare off any other undeserirable suitors. i don't know if i agree with that, but that's what they had to say on the subject.i like men who don't give a shit about societal norms and who are a bit on the rebellious, take-no-shit-from-anyone side because that's how i am. i don't want a pussy. now "bad boy" means different things to different people. i don't consider a jekoff who lives with mommy and beats women and kills puppies to be a bad boy. i consider that to be a nasty little bitch coward.
    dating is a bit of a game at first, but isn't that waht people want? a thrill? the chase? the mystery of getting to know somebody and NOT knowing if they like you back? both sexes want an independent, intelligent mate who has their own life and doesn't feel the need to give it all away and gush about their feelings on the first date. so is it a game...maybe. you show your best sides at first, but you aren't really lying. does anybody REALLy want to know about how much you hate your boss or about how you haven't washed your hair in 6 weeks at first?
    i think there was already a debate about what was "creepy" to us, and about why women don't like the "nice guy"

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    I do agree with that to some extent...the dude doesn't have to be the biggest and baddest (thats a preference of aesthetics) but he should be willing and able to protect his girl. She should feel secure and safe with him.

    And I agree with you Simone on taking the norms and shoving it...I get a lot of shit from friends/people for having an umbrella at car meets. Really? Why yall tripping its hot as fuck out here with 90+ degree Cali summer weather so I am staying cool (literally cool...from an appearance stand point I think its dorky but whatever its function) and protecting my skin. Its as if what I am doing according to them is "gay" or feminine. And any guy who hits women or men when it is not in self defense and or for sport ie. MMA/boxing/etc. is a piece of shit. Torturing animals is terrible...the guilty should be tortured right back...eye for eye.

    I guess thinking about it now...yeah it is a game. And its a game we all play when we enter. I was just bothered by how both sides have their negatives but that is to be expected...of course. I think the PUA forums have fuckled my mind in the relationship/dating department. Its confusing because some of their advice makes plenty of sense and even the women on there agree that it works...I mean women won't know the guy is using PUA techniques because it really is just confidence and being fun and spontaneous. So there is nothing bad about that, whats bad is if all he wants is to get laid and not have a true connection where even without sex...it would still mean something. Then here I am feeling like an AFC (average frustrated chump) because apparently nearly everything I am doing or have done is a demonstration of lower value or etc.

    Okay, I will just be me. I know I am good enough and I am a decent enough person with enough intelligence and common sense to hold my own in all facets of life. Ill be fine with that.
    Last edited by BlackSheEp3; 06-29-2013 at 09:18 PM.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    You seem like a very nice person at heart, but I get the impression that you have an underlying issue that is causing you to have problems in several facets of life. From what I recall of most of your threads, you come off as being hypercritical of your appearance, and you also exhaustively analyze your interactions/how others might perceive you. I also suspect that some female or another has called you creepy, since that word in particular is a recurring theme in your threads. Maybe I'm totally off base, but it has been my experience that those who have chronic social difficulties and adopt cynical standpoints need to work on something within themselves. Yes, some people are complete dicks and being in an area that is heavily populated by them can make life shittier, but my impression is that you are at least partly responsible for the perpetuation of this problem.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by tuesdaymarie View Post
    You seem like a very nice person at heart, but I get the impression that you have an underlying issue that is causing you to have problems in several facets of life. From what I recall of most of your threads, you come off as being hypercritical of your appearance, and you also exhaustively analyze your interactions/how others might perceive you. I also suspect that some female or another has called you creepy, since that word in particular is a recurring theme in your threads. Maybe I'm totally off base, but it has been my experience that those who have chronic social difficulties and adopt cynical standpoints need to work on something within themselves. Yes, some people are complete dicks and being in an area that is heavily populated by them can make life shittier, but my impression is that you are at least partly responsible for the perpetuation of this problem.
    You are correct that I care about my looks way to much. Its to the point that I avoid looking in the mirror at times. Despite people telling me that I look decent enough (bear in mind the people I asked are brutally honest and critical so if they say I am alright I will believe it) and I do know that I aint butt ugly but yeah it is what it is. Ever since I was little my mom would tell me, will get your nose fixed when your older. Coming from a Asian family (cant speak for all) but having a "white" nose and fair skin was always desired...I didn't think much of it then but constantly hearing that my face needed to be modified...it made me feel that damn my nose sucks, my facial structure is not chiseled...damn Asian features. Its like how some white people want to be tan...well I actually like being tanned and I am but my family always says "Your so dark, stay out of the sun." People want what they dont have....I will admit I like the western features such as eyes and nose...but the tan/olive complexion I cherish that. It just looks better in my eyes. But I like white skin too, its nice just not on me.

    And perception is everything at least to me so that is why I am so concerned about my body language, tone of voice, actions, etc. Because if I was truly myself in public, people would think I was bananas. I guess it comes down to simply conforming to the norms...anything that is not the norm is considered abnormal and that means a lot to me because to get further in life...I have to appear as normal as possible. I know there is a time and place to be serious and to be playful and what not...okay Ill stop here because I think I am over analyzing again.

    And yes my best friend (female) has said I was creepy when we first met at college...then she took it back and just says I am weird and random as hell. Also she says I am crazy...but not cereal killer crazy but more of shits and giggles crazy. I feel the things I do to poke fun with her are just novelties...nothing out of this world. Because I am just a human...no superpowers so what can I do that is possible so groundbreaking. Also I am sure some females/males thought I was creepy...but thats okay with me because I can only be me. I wear my sunglasses indoors sometimes so people don't see my eyes...they tell me that its creepy and ask why I do it. I say its like the window tint on my car...it provides privacy. Or I go to the movies alone because I simply dont have a friend to go with me...and thats creepy. Or I eat out alone...and thats creepy. People will all have their definition.

    I do take responsibility and will admit I am socially awkward. I mean I can hold on my own well enough in public but I never had a lot of friends and still dont. I don't even want a bunch of friends...I just want a few that are of good quality. I know I deserve it because I do good for my best friend...I help her out when she needs advice, a ride, a shoulder to cry on...and I genuinely care for her well being and success. I know how to be a friend...I stay loyal.

    P.S. Change starts with ourselves, and I dont live my life in denial. I know and admit what I am.
    Last edited by BlackSheEp3; 06-29-2013 at 10:27 PM.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    ^I have an Asian-American friend who has similar appearance-related obsessions. He admits he thinks he has body dysmorphic disorder and talks about it in relation to his relatives who have eating disorders. I really do think it is a cultural thing, at least in large part. Have you considered therapy for it? I know that I am also hypercritical of my appearance, and that it can ruin your day (or more). I really only have one close friend, my boyfriend, and I'm socially awkward too, so I feel you on pretty much all of these issues. I don't have any great advice for solving them, but I've found that quieting my almost constant inner dialogue has helped. Mine was definitely related to social anxiety and it caused me to frequently reinforce negative thoughts about myself, the world, and other people's opinions of me. Once my head became a bit clearer, a healthy relationship that's still going strong fell into place, and people commented on how much more friendly and open I seemed.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Can we merge all your threads about relationships? This is getting a little redundant.
    Quote Originally Posted by qurl View Post
    You are sassy AND smart Miss Pickles.

    "Well behaved women seldom make history." - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    A decent guy who is okay looking, a little socially awkward, and generally nice. That's a dime a dozen. No, that's a penny for a few million. You're going to need confidence, the ability to take rejection and approach hundreds/thousands of women, good conversation skills, humor, and many other traits to begin to have a chance with an attractive woman. It's one of those 80/20 rules. The top 20% of men have the top 80% of women chasing after them, and vice versa. The rest are left with the scraps like us.

    You sound a lot like me 5-10 years ago. Today I'm more bitter and more aware of my own shortcomings. Two ex-girlfriends have loved me and were ready to get married to me. They were both great people. I just wasn't attracted to either one of them, and I wasted my time (and theirs) trying to convince myself I was. Both relationships were great in all regards, except the bedroom. I lack the looks and other qualities required for me to get the sort of woman I'm looking for, though. Women like me just fine, but are rarely attracted to me. I can't exactly complain, since I'm just as shallow. Women pushing 300lbs just don't do it for me.

    Today I focus on being happy while single for two reasons. (1) I'm not going to find love until I love myself. (2) If I'm going to be alone forever, then I'd damned well better get used to (and enjoy) it. I'm doing alright. I go to Vegas twice a year, I have disposable income, and I have enough hobbies and interests that I'm never bored when I'm by myself. Not everyone gets to be a winner in life, and plenty have it far worse off than me.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by tuesdaymarie View Post
    ^I have an Asian-American friend who has similar appearance-related obsessions. He admits he thinks he has body dysmorphic disorder and talks about it in relation to his relatives who have eating disorders. I really do think it is a cultural thing, at least in large part. Have you considered therapy for it? I know that I am also hypercritical of my appearance, and that it can ruin your day (or more). I really only have one close friend, my boyfriend, and I'm socially awkward too, so I feel you on pretty much all of these issues. I don't have any great advice for solving them, but I've found that quieting my almost constant inner dialogue has helped. Mine was definitely related to social anxiety and it caused me to frequently reinforce negative thoughts about myself, the world, and other people's opinions of me. Once my head became a bit clearer, a healthy relationship that's still going strong fell into place, and people commented on how much more friendly and open I seemed.
    Body dysmorphic disorder, hmmm I might have that but isn't that when your never satisfied with your appearance? I would be content if my facial structure was chiseled. I am already content with my nose (after the rhino was complete) and I like my eyes now because they have become more almond shaped...im cool with my skin tone. Its just that chiseled face. I think someone like Michael Jackson (which I am a big fan of) had body dysmorphic disorder....the endless number of surgeries on his nose for one thing. But I remember reading his father would torment and call him big nose/ugly. That is damaging...especially coming from all people, your own father.

    I have seen a therapist in the past, I have depression that comes and goes. The depression is always in regards to my looks. Sometimes I feel really good about my looks...other times I am just meh on it. Its better now...before I used to look at myself and just sit and feel uber bad...like damn if only I had some white mixed in me. I tend to like the look of the mixed Asians...you know white father/asian mother. Once again its a cultural thing. And like you I really only have one close friend...my best friend Kristina.

    I just feel like if I was a hot looking guy...id be one hell of a cocky SOB. It doesnt make it right..but hey I can be cocky and respectful. It dont mean that I will be a meanie...it just means I will be full of confidence Ill be approaching women left and right because looks is what gets the girl....personality keeps her. Looks matter...anybody who says otherwise is full of crap. Looks arent everything yes I know...but it matters. Success in life is a game changer when you have looks vs no looks.

    I just need to learn to accept myself...but maybe later I will consider plastic surgery in a discreet manner if I ever have the funds for the luxury of doing so. My savings right now is for laser eye surgery granted I am a candidate...I am ready to be free of my glasses.

    I am glad your thoughts have cleared/improved, good for you and I wish you all the best. There is room for improvement all the time...in all of us. We can always be better in mind, body, and soul.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    I lack the looks and other qualities required for me to get the sort of woman I'm looking for, though. Women like me just fine, but are rarely attracted to me. I can't exactly complain, since I'm just as shallow. Women pushing 300lbs just don't do it for me.
    I am curious, what are these things? Are they things that you can work on or change?
    “Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.”

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    A decent guy who is okay looking, a little socially awkward, and generally nice. That's a dime a dozen. No, that's a penny for a few million. You're going to need confidence, the ability to take rejection and approach hundreds/thousands of women, good conversation skills, humor, and many other traits to begin to have a chance with an attractive woman. It's one of those 80/20 rules. The top 20% of men have the top 80% of women chasing after them, and vice versa. The rest are left with the scraps like us.

    You sound a lot like me 5-10 years ago. Today I'm more bitter and more aware of my own shortcomings. Two ex-girlfriends have loved me and were ready to get married to me. They were both great people. I just wasn't attracted to either one of them, and I wasted my time (and theirs) trying to convince myself I was. Both relationships were great in all regards, except the bedroom. I lack the looks and other qualities required for me to get the sort of woman I'm looking for, though. Women like me just fine, but are rarely attracted to me. I can't exactly complain, since I'm just as shallow. Women pushing 300lbs just don't do it for me.

    Today I focus on being happy while single for two reasons. (1) I'm not going to find love until I love myself. (2) If I'm going to be alone forever, then I'd damned well better get used to (and enjoy) it. I'm doing alright. I go to Vegas twice a year, I have disposable income, and I have enough hobbies and interests that I'm never bored when I'm by myself. Not everyone gets to be a winner in life, and plenty have it far worse off than me.
    True that, and plus I don't stand out. Not like I try but I did noticed when some Asian friends flipped the script and grew their hair out for braids/dreadlocks/Asian Afro they received more attention/conversation from strangers especially girls without any effort on their part. The thing is I dress to blend in, as well as conduct myself in a stealthy manner. My friend Jason (he is seriously a Filipino version of rapper T.I.) he gets girls talking to him simple because he has so much swag/confidence. He even managed to get marry a hot ass Italian chick...good for him. What I am getting at is I should act like I own it...just be confident even when I am not...eventually I will truly feel it. I feel once I persevere with growing out my hair and get some dreadlocks or maybe even fro it out...I know I am gonna stand out. I mean how many Asian dudes you see with dreads or long hair...well maybe the long hair but still its enough to be different. I feel like I will be full of swag once I get my hair the way I want it. I can already talk/sound black...my favorite genre is hip hop. So if I look like a black/Asian dude...its a change in the mix from your typical Asian dude. Although I do notice a good amount of black girls already notice me...I just never said wassup to them because I was scurred. I need to man up and stop worrying about rejection...its not the end of the world.

    But hey you know what...you approach 5-10 women a day you are probably bound to get at least one or two that are interested lol. I know if I get more active and start hollering something will have to happen...I know that.

    At least you have your finances in order...that's a big deal/relief. And you have hobbies to keep you busy and happy. Ill be okay to in that department...not rich but more than average. I dont want much anyways...I will already get two houses from my dad when he passes and my dream car is a mere 30-70K (Acura NSX) so I have reachable dreams/goals.

    Sucks about your past relationships but they are learning experiences none the less.

    And best of luck to you, hope you find that inner peace once and for all.

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by safado View Post
    I am curious, what are these things? Are they things that you can work on or change?
    Confidence and self esteem would be the biggest. I tried therapy at one point, but the therapist told me "I can't give you self esteem." I'm not really sure where they come from. Practice and positive experiences? If so it's a bit of a catch-22; without confidence, I have negative experiences when trying to date, and that just pushes my self-esteem and confidence down further. After several years of online dating I feel worse about myself now than when I started. Most people just say "fake it til you make it," which is like telling an idiot to fake being smart until they're smart.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    1.) Different women want different things.

    2.) You can't go out searching and pushing for a relationship. You need to authentically just so happen to come across a woman who will fit into your life nicely, whom you are attracted to. You need to pursue her and pursue other women until you find someone whom ALSO thinks you are a good match for them, whom they are also attracted to.

    3.) You need to pursue multiple women at once and not be hung up on just one of them. That doesn't mean being a crazy date-a-holic or a serial cheater, but just date around til something works out. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.



    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    Confidence and self esteem would be the biggest. I tried therapy at one point, but the therapist told me "I can't give you self esteem." I'm not really sure where they come from. Practice and positive experiences? If so it's a bit of a catch-22; without confidence, I have negative experiences when trying to date, and that just pushes my self-esteem and confidence down further. After several years of online dating I feel worse about myself now than when I started. Most people just say "fake it til you make it," which is like telling an idiot to fake being smart until they're smart.
    IMO, self-esteem is just rooted in being in your own element, because that is what makes you authentic happy and authentically able to enjoy life. Being obsessed with your hobbies and own interests, working hard at work, being financially stable (or at least working toward it), and casting out all the minor-to-moderate problems in life that you don't really need to worry about.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    Confidence and self esteem would be the biggest. I tried therapy at one point, but the therapist told me "I can't give you self esteem." I'm not really sure where they come from. Practice and positive experiences? If so it's a bit of a catch-22; without confidence, I have negative experiences when trying to date, and that just pushes my self-esteem and confidence down further. After several years of online dating I feel worse about myself now than when I started. Most people just say "fake it til you make it," which is like telling an idiot to fake being smart until they're smart.
    At times I suffer from the confidence thing. It seems like I have my best luck meeting women when I already have a FWB situation going on, probably because I just don't care and don't really try so hard, and I think women can smell even the slightest bit of desperation from a mile away lol.
    “Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.”

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    I think PUA shit is just that: shit. You don't need to play a game to get women (nor do women need to play a game to get men). Treat women like human beings, not like some alien species that you have to play some intricate game of body language or whatever to trick her into sleeping with you. Be yourself, be strong and confident, work out and get yourself some interesting hobbies and don't be needy or clingy. Some women will like you, some won't.

    I think the whole "women like jerks" thing is a misconception. Women don't like jerks, they like guys who are INTERESTING, confident, assertive and strong, maybe with a bit of a mysterious streak. Some guys think that just because they are nice to a woman that she owes them sex. Because what could be better than being "nice"? This is wrong. I've had a couple boyfriends who were just nice and nothing else. They were really sweet and all, but they weren't fun, interesting or sexy. They didn't have much of a personality. They were boring, clingy, had no idea how to be charming or passionate, etc.

    There's no doubt that some girls are really attracted to the "bad boys" in that they gravitate towards assholes, criminals, etc. I have no idea why that is. But I think most of the time it's just girls going after interesting, unique, assertive guys and then the nice guys see this and they're all like "he's a JERK!" because they're jealous or something, idk.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Women don't like jerks, we like good guys. However most men who think they are nice guys aren't nice at all.


    Quote Originally Posted by lestat1 View Post
    Confidence and self esteem would be the biggest. I tried therapy at one point, but the therapist told me "I can't give you self esteem." I'm not really sure where they come from. Practice and positive experiences? If so it's a bit of a catch-22; without confidence, I have negative experiences when trying to date, and that just pushes my self-esteem and confidence down further. After several years of online dating I feel worse about myself now than when I started. Most people just say "fake it til you make it," which is like telling an idiot to fake being smart until they're smart.
    I hate online because it seems (at least from my perspective)that the men on there were either losers, ugly, or pieces of shit. A decent professional man without kids? not online or at least they never contacted me. Instead I got the obese men, the guys with kids (though my profile stated no kids), the perverts and the inbreds who could barely read or write and worked jobs way below what they should be (like the 50 year old KFC cook). Guys I know who did online said they got the female versions of this. Leads me to believe that online isn't really for meeting quality people.

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    Default Re: The relationship "game" is poop.

    Quote Originally Posted by Smurfette View Post
    I think PUA shit is just that: shit. You don't need to play a game to get women (nor do women need to play a game to get men). Treat women like human beings, not like some alien species that you have to play some intricate game of body language or whatever to trick her into sleeping with you. Be yourself, be strong and confident, work out and get yourself some interesting hobbies and don't be needy or clingy. Some women will like you, some won't.

    I think the whole "women like jerks" thing is a misconception. Women don't like jerks, they like guys who are INTERESTING, confident, assertive and strong, maybe with a bit of a mysterious streak. Some guys think that just because they are nice to a woman that she owes them sex. Because what could be better than being "nice"? This is wrong. I've had a couple boyfriends who were just nice and nothing else. They were really sweet and all, but they weren't fun, interesting or sexy. They didn't have much of a personality. They were boring, clingy, had no idea how to be charming or passionate, etc.

    There's no doubt that some girls are really attracted to the "bad boys" in that they gravitate towards assholes, criminals, etc. I have no idea why that is. But I think most of the time it's just girls going after interesting, unique, assertive guys and then the nice guys see this and they're all like "he's a JERK!" because they're jealous or something, idk.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    Women don't like jerks, we like good guys. However most men who think they are nice guys aren't nice at all.




    I hate online because it seems (at least from my perspective)that the men on there were either losers, ugly, or pieces of shit. A decent professional man without kids? not online or at least they never contacted me. Instead I got the obese men, the guys with kids (though my profile stated no kids), the perverts and the inbreds who could barely read or write and worked jobs way below what they should be (like the 50 year old KFC cook). Guys I know who did online said they got the female versions of this. Leads me to believe that online isn't really for meeting quality people.
    1. After spending more time on the PUA forums, I have come to conclude that most men on there are good guys. The real PUAs make it clear to women they are dating, do not lead the girl on, and no mind games. They are pretty legit and the advice/techniques they give is common sense but its crucial and most men make the mistakes of not being socially savvy. For example, just being confident and assertive goes a long way.

    I have learned quite a bit. For example I practice good posture, keep my hands out of my pockets, walk with confidence. I maintain eye contact with the person I am talking to. I make sure that my movements are smooth and my body language is strong. I have even tried a few cold approaches and gotten two phone numbers today from approaching 4 girls (2 in the mall, 2 in Starbucks). I had some major AA (approach anxiety) but I told myself fuck it...gotta learn and try. Its all a learning experience. One of the chicks in Starbucks was a HB8;hot babe 8, I use the rating for overall social value...not just looks. But she was a top package. Anyways I used the 3 second rule to make sure I would approach. Basically that means within 3 seconds of making eye contact with the girl...the guy should approach. Just hanging around and looking might make it awkward/show lack of confidence and or look supposedly creepy. Well she was with 3 other friends...one looked like a mother hen who kept eyeing me. I made sure to disarm her by addressing the whole group and focusing on the target ;the HB8. I managed to close with her number after some small talk and building attraction (at least I believe I did) and some kino (I touched her shoulder lightly during the middle of the convo). Anyways this PUA stuff does work and there is no mind games/bullshit about it...its just common sense really. You have to show girls you have value vs. talking about it. And confidence...thats the big one. There is so much to learn but just from reading the glossary alone...I have picked up a lot of good stuff.


    2. Men should not bother saying they are good guys..rather they should SHOW it. Actions speak louder than words.

    And as for online dating...the paid vs. free tend to have better quality of males/females.
    I say just go out and meet people, thats a lot better than online hands down.

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