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Thread: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

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    Default Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I am not going to lie here, I ALWAYS been apprehensive to APPROACH a dancer for...a dance. I feel like if they're just chilling sipping a glass or on their phone texting or just chilling, they obviously want to take a break (or are lazy but that's another thing) or are waiting for something and OBVIOUSLY don't want to be bothered with dancing....at the moment. Is this true, because sometimes some of these ladies be frigging hot but are just deliberately sitting away from the gentlemen. I don't want to be rude and disrupt your break time, because I want you dancing at your peak, not while your irritated, because that's no fun for you or me (I've had one chick give me a lap dance while text and frankly that was half assed and I got rid of her real quick for that). I would just say fuck it and go for broke, but because I know ladies talk to each other about what type of customer is what, I don't want to be pegged as the desperate needy and possibly creepy guy and thus get avoided like the plague. What do you ladies think?

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Of course you can approach a dancer that you like and ask them for a dance ! As long as they aren't busy talking to another customer, why not? I'm amazed that girls are allowed to be on their phones on the floor btw-that's a little rude, uninviting and unprofessional IMO.
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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Quote Originally Posted by OliveJardin View Post
    I'm amazed that girls are allowed to be on their phones on the floor btw-that's a little rude, uninviting and unprofessional IMO.
    I agree totally with this. Some of the clubs I go to flat-out don't allow it and police it well. Others don't seem to care. The girls that are constantly texting seem disconnected from the job to me. I know that often times they are actually in contact with customers who are coming in to see them but I think that sort of thing needs to be kept in the dressing room. When a dancer is on the floor she needs to have her head in the game.

    As far as the OP's concern about feeling needy, desperate or creepy I can't even fathom that thought process. You are not in a singles bar. it's a strip club. They are selling and you are buying. The only time you appear desperate, needy or creepy is when you start asking for discounts, start asking too many personal questions or get too clingy before or after your money has been spent. Relax and enjoy. Stop over analyzing. It's a simple exchange of money for a girl's attention.
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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I actually liked being approached. One of my best regulars did this and I'm glad he did because I probably wouldn't have approached him because he wasn't my typical regular.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I love when customers approach me. If I'm sitting alone or even talking to another dancer, I will never be mad if a customer approaches me.

    ...Unless he just tries to eat up my time without spending any money, but that's always irritating.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Quote Originally Posted by estafador View Post
    OBVIOUSLY don't want to be bothered with dancing....at the moment.
    Not obvious at all. 100% incorrect, actually. We are at the club to make money, not pay to sit around at the bar and play on our phones. We are happy to have you come up to us and ask for a dance, saving us the effort of having to approach and hustle.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I presume that a dancer on the floor is available, if she needed a break, she would be in the back, plus they can get called to the stage, so they are ready. Cell usage by dancers is very common in So. Cal, especially if they are trying to think of the next song they want to go up stage to, though personally I think the ones who make the most try to minimize time just sitting around on phones like this.

    Talk to the DJ/bouncers and waitresses if you need to be occupied or chill in the back and come out periodically. Makes you look more in demand, instead of the surly dancer, bitter she isn't making bank tonight that sits on her phone checking FB for her friends updates.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Why would we mind? The entire point of being there is to do dances and make money. If a girl is just sitting around, it's probably because she's sick of approaching customers and would LOVE a customer to approach her instead.
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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    100 percent of the time, my best experiences have come from dancers I approached. A lot of this has to do with where I position myself. Sitting at the bar in the rear of the club lends itself to lesser contact, because dancers tend to approach customers at tables and/or VIP area. This works out great for me, because I can scan the club at my leisure, pick out a dancer based on how she does lap dances, and then approach.
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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Obviously not.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I love to be approached for dances. I feel thats much better but I think alot of guys think like this..

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I approach dancers all the time without any ill effects. I'm very picky. I'd rather select from all the girls in the club than just the ones who happen to come my way. As for appearing desperate and possibly creepy, relax. That already comes with being a customer in a strip club.

    I never simply ask for a dance. I usually say something like it would be awesome if she could join me when she's not too busy. Of course, a dance is assumed to be the eventual objective, unless she somehow turns out to be toxic. And if she's just been sitting fooling around with her phone, it's laughably obvious that she's "not too busy".

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I love being approached as well. The only time it becomes an issue is when I'm on stage and multiple men approach and ask for a dance...some get offended if they are "in line" waiting for me. In that case I just organize it as a "first come first serve" situation.
    I'd grab my trumpet and I'd do a stripper sound, like the old Louis Armstrong, real raspy. And the people would go nuts! Then I knew that the sexual, sensual, guttural sound, that throbbing sound, is where it's at.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Quote Originally Posted by curt828 View Post
    I approach dancers all the time without any ill effects. I'm very picky. I'd rather select from all the girls in the club than just the ones who happen to come my way. As for appearing desperate and possibly creepy, relax. That already comes with being a customer in a strip club.

    I never simply ask for a dance. I usually say something like it would be awesome if she could join me when she's not too busy. Of course, a dance is assumed to be the eventual objective, unless she somehow turns out to be toxic. And if she's just been sitting fooling around with her phone, it's laughably obvious that she's "not too busy".
    Agreed! WE are never too busy to do a dance, we look at our phones because we are bored an nobody is getting us naked!lbs. We are there to do dances, as many as possible so you asking us makes our job easier and funner cause we didnt have to "sell you" on a dance, you just wanted one.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Quote Originally Posted by curt828 View Post
    I approach dancers all the time without any ill effects. I'm very picky. I'd rather select from all the girls in the club than just the ones who happen to come my way. As for appearing desperate and possibly creepy, relax. That already comes with being a customer in a strip club.

    I never simply ask for a dance. I usually say something like it would be awesome if she could join me when she's not too busy. Of course, a dance is assumed to be the eventual objective, unless she somehow turns out to be toxic. And if she's just been sitting fooling around with her phone, it's laughably obvious that she's "not too busy".
    Agreed! WE are never too busy to do a dance, we look at our phones because we are bored an nobody is getting us naked!lbs. We are there to do dances, as many as possible so you asking us makes our job easier and funner cause we didnt have to "sell you" on a dance, you just wanted one.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    if we don't want to be approached we will hide in the dr. even if we arw on our phones, we are hoping someone will approach us. I often have better nights when I patiently wait for someone to approach me than potentially waste my time going up to guys who arent interested

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    I'm quite shy by nature & would not be put off at all by a customer approaching me for a dance. Often I will stand in a corner or near the bar where I can see the whole floor & think to myself, 'Awwww shit ... Where the hell do I start???' so yes plz. Yes, plzplzplz if you fancy me, come grab me!

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    This is like saying "i wonder if fat chick would mind me giving her a double cheesburger with fries & a "diet" coke for FREE."

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Quote Originally Posted by Aniela View Post
    I'm quite shy by nature & would not be put off at all by a customer approaching me for a dance. Often I will stand in a corner or near the bar where I can see the whole floor & think to myself, 'Awwww shit ... Where the hell do I start???' so yes plz. Yes, plzplzplz if you fancy me, come grab me!
    One of the things that's occurred to me over the past couple of years is how often I look at a stripper and think she looks incredibly aloof (with "aloof" being the nicest word I can think of!), only to find out that what has been coming off as aloofness is actually shyness. As a customer, I wouldn't have thought shy girls get into this biz, but sure enough, they do. My fave dancer through most of 2012 came off as so untouchable that I was practically terrified of her (okay, I'm exaggerating ... a little). She turned out to be INSANELY shy, and the rewards for finally making her acquaintance were amazing. She was an wonderful woman, once you drew her out, and she so disdained having to "go talk to strangers" that once she finally met a customer, she really cultivated the relationship so he'd keep coming back. And I did. Ironically, I was never going to approach her ... the only reason we met is because the club manager saw me sit at the stage for her show, and he knows I never sit at the stage, so he practically forced her to come say hi to me.

    On the other side, I realize this is a strip club, but one of the things I enjoy about it is being approached by the women. As a result, I tend never to walk over and immediately ask a stripper for a dance. But, if I see her alone at the bar, I will go up, make a joke and some small talk; if she's sitting with girls I know, I'll approach the one I do know and then introduce myself to the one I *want* to know. I won't ask for a dance -- she needs to put in a little flirting time and ask me -- but if I can't get her attention any other way, I will approach her just to shoot the shit, make my interest as plain as day, and then let her take it where she wants.

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Sometimes I need to wear a sign "ask me" as often ignored at some clubs as are some others I go with.

    I usually position myself furthest from the stage (I've seen zillions of nude women , isn't my interest unless they are really good acrobatic type skilled dancers not just seductive). I joke at these times almost feel like tripping them walking by so will notice me, but of course never would - not a good intro.

    Dancers I do connect with have told me they guys further away are probably interested more in lap dances vs those by the stage.

    Often I stand so can move around, sometimes where dancers have to walk by on the way to or from the dancers room etc.

    I am hesitant to approaching a dancer because one can get a vibe when dancer approaches you if she has a bit of intelligence and ability to do more than wiggly her butt (no offense intended). I usually turn down the "wanta dance" approach since prefer those that actually want some intelligent conversation (many do) instead of just fast buck for a dance. There are many dancers that do enjoy talk and not about sports or the weather!

    Some dancers enjoy meaningful conversation so much I have to suggest dances. Once a friend and I went together and two gals sat in our laps just enjoying our company (and in heaven with me massaging her back she said) we felt uncomfortable about taking away their money time for an hour. We talked to them about it and they both said they just enjoyed the break from the typical guys at the club and enjoyed more mature guys and tired of being turned down so much.

    I am also selective physically (not into huge breasts and prefer natural and slimmer bodies but not too thin). I also observe dancers interactions with others since I'm more interested in quality touch intimacy vs wild dancers. I've enjoyed many great, my type of dancers for 30 years. But not always easy to find since high turnover of dancers at most clubs. Many are going to college etc and are preparing for other careers.

    Whether I am standing or sitting also note the approach if its "wanta dance" from 3 feet away of cuddling up to me in my lap or by my side.

    Another hesitation in me approaching is some dancers prefer the young wild guys and others prefer the more elderly nice gentlemen like I think I am more like! Many have talked about this with me.

    If I don't have the right type of gal approach me I usually get very bored and eventually leave as I am not into drinking, staring at stage dancers and can hardly stand most of the loud blaring noise some folks call music!!

    But when I find the right dancers it can be well worth the frustration. Yet as a customer would rather be approached (and can agree or not) vs having to pick.

    The opposite is the case in the Thailand massage places or the hostess clubs of LA I use to enjoy and do many reports on. In Thailand select from zillions of women just based on looks often behind glass. In LA Hostess clubs gals all sit in an area and like a High School dance (long ago) the guys stand another area and have to approach the gals for dances. (you pay by time and then can go to couch and do various things depending on the club and gal. One of the clubs was all Asian and very high priced. Then their were Hispanic clubs but most dancers didn't speak any English - hard for me that does not know Spanish but enjoyed a few times. In those situations the women never were allowed to approach men, only men could select.
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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    Quote Originally Posted by Radius View Post
    One of the things that's occurred to me over the past couple of years is how often I look at a stripper and think she looks incredibly aloof (with "aloof" being the nicest word I can think of!), only to find out that what has been coming off as aloofness is actually shyness. As a customer, I wouldn't have thought shy girls get into this biz, but sure enough, they do. My fave dancer through most of 2012 came off as so untouchable that I was practically terrified of her (okay, I'm exaggerating ... a little). She turned out to be INSANELY shy, and the rewards for finally making her acquaintance were amazing. She was an wonderful woman, once you drew her out, and she so disdained having to "go talk to strangers" that once she finally met a customer, she really cultivated the relationship so he'd keep coming back. And I did. Ironically, I was never going to approach her ... the only reason we met is because the club manager saw me sit at the stage for her show, and he knows I never sit at the stage, so he practically forced her to come say hi to me.

    On the other side, I realize this is a strip club, but one of the things I enjoy about it is being approached by the women. As a result, I tend never to walk over and immediately ask a stripper for a dance. But, if I see her alone at the bar, I will go up, make a joke and some small talk; if she's sitting with girls I know, I'll approach the one I do know and then introduce myself to the one I *want* to know. I won't ask for a dance -- she needs to put in a little flirting time and ask me -- but if I can't get her attention any other way, I will approach her just to shoot the shit, make my interest as plain as day, and then let her take it where she wants.
    I often just wait to go onstage in order to gauge customers' interest in me. I think of my stage show, along w/ any resulting tips, as the icebreaker. I hate cold-approaching customers, esp after having gotten several rebuffs in a row. But once I know that I have your attention ...

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    Default Re: Do you mind the customer coming up to YOU for a dance

    If I am in the building, I am interested in dancing for money.

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